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(The Atlantic)   The financial benefits of being really, really, really, ridiculously good looking. Which is something all Farkers can relate to, obviously   (m.theatlantic.com) divider line 48
    More: Spiffy, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Greg Mankiw  
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9696 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Jan 2014 at 4:04 PM (35 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



48 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-01-11 04:11:39 PM
The downside is that still you too can't not die in a freak gasoline fight accident.
 
2014-01-11 04:12:39 PM
media.giphy.com
 
2014-01-11 04:13:55 PM
I couldn't get past the word "snuggly".
 
2014-01-11 04:14:17 PM
Question: What are the financial ramifications of being ugly but hung like a moose?

Answer: I'll tell ya in five years.
 
2014-01-11 04:14:50 PM

www.schnarff.com


I'm, too sexy for my chin.

 
2014-01-11 04:15:05 PM
People prefer prettier things, film at eleven.
 
2014-01-11 04:15:59 PM

Contents Under Pressure: I couldn't get past the word "snuggly".


It's just a way to refer to babies that aren't really really good looking and instead look like Lyndon Johnson.

/I said 'that one is one *snuggly* baby'
 
2014-01-11 04:17:27 PM
1.bp.blogspot.com

/oblig
 
2014-01-11 04:18:25 PM

BigLuca: Question: What are the financial ramifications of being ugly but hung like a moose?

Answer: I'll tell ya in five years.


As an ugly but hung guy, your odds of getting laid on a given night at the bar are about the same as an ugly guy with a small cawk.
 
2014-01-11 04:20:38 PM

Oldiron_79: BigLuca: Question: What are the financial ramifications of being ugly but hung like a moose?

Answer: I'll tell ya in five years.

As an ugly but hung guy, your odds of getting laid on a given night at the bar are about the same as an ugly guy with a small cawk.


Well thank god I was just kidding.  I'm actually hung like a gerbil.
 
2014-01-11 04:23:22 PM
I'm no bog troll, but during the vast majority of my work and client interactions I'm usually wearing ratty boxer shorts and a stained white t-shirt and I haven't showered or shaved; on several occasions I've conducted conference calls with CEO's and Medical Directors of major healthcare organizations (I'm looking at you Blue Cross Blue Shield) while sitting on the toilet taking a shiat.

/just have to remember to hit "mute" before the kerplunk
//works from home
///makes good money despite average looks
 
2014-01-11 04:26:12 PM
I myself am actually quite handsome.

I don't have anything to contribute to this thread, just sort of putting that out there.
 
2014-01-11 04:28:31 PM

Shrink: I'm no bog troll, but during the vast majority of my work and client interactions I'm usually wearing ratty boxer shorts and a stained white t-shirt and I haven't showered or shaved; on several occasions I've conducted conference calls with CEO's and Medical Directors of major healthcare organizations (I'm looking at you Blue Cross Blue Shield) while sitting on the toilet taking a shiat.

/just have to remember to hit "mute" before the kerplunk
//works from home
///makes good money despite average looks


I guess this is as good a place as any, we haven't had the heart to tell you but we switched to video conferencing months ago.  Yes, we are all excellent poker players.
 
2014-01-11 04:31:47 PM
static3.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-01-11 04:33:49 PM
I wouldn't know.

I make ugly seem an inadequate word.
 
2014-01-11 04:38:29 PM
Well, gentlemen of that persuasion.  First take a look at my profile and bask in the gloriousness of my gorgeous facade, then email me with photos of your own facade and genitals, and finally, with any luck, I'll be willing to share with you some of the ridiculously fabulous wealth I've managed to acquire over the years.
 
2014-01-11 04:45:53 PM

BumpInTheNight: Shrink: I'm no bog troll, but during the vast majority of my work and client interactions I'm usually wearing ratty boxer shorts and a stained white t-shirt and I haven't showered or shaved; on several occasions I've conducted conference calls with CEO's and Medical Directors of major healthcare organizations (I'm looking at you Blue Cross Blue Shield) while sitting on the toilet taking a shiat.

/just have to remember to hit "mute" before the kerplunk
//works from home
///makes good money despite average looks

I guess this is as good a place as any, we haven't had the heart to tell you but we switched to video conferencing months ago.  Yes, we are all excellent poker players.


ha!
 
2014-01-11 04:47:36 PM
I'm so handsome chicks throw money at me on the street. True, it's mostly coins, but hey.
 
2014-01-11 04:47:39 PM
My penis and I can relate.
 
2014-01-11 04:48:00 PM

Rapmaster2000: I'm, too sexy for my chin.


Obscenely large piles of filthy lucre also substitutes for Spanish Fly for fugly guys and vapid gold digging women.

/Only slightly bitter
 
2014-01-11 04:48:31 PM
Wait, you mean people don't normally hide their face behind a paper bag and benefit?
 
2014-01-11 04:48:51 PM

BumpInTheNight: Shrink: I'm no bog troll, but during the vast majority of my work and client interactions I'm usually wearing ratty boxer shorts and a stained white t-shirt and I haven't showered or shaved; on several occasions I've conducted conference calls with CEO's and Medical Directors of major healthcare organizations (I'm looking at you Blue Cross Blue Shield) while sitting on the toilet taking a shiat.

/just have to remember to hit "mute" before the kerplunk
//works from home
///makes good money despite average looks

I guess this is as good a place as any, we haven't had the heart to tell you but we switched to video conferencing months ago.  Yes, we are all excellent poker players.


Well, that explains a lot. I hope the camera angle and shadows makes everything look bigger...
 
2014-01-11 04:50:35 PM

houstondragon: Rapmaster2000: I'm, too sexy for my chin.

Obscenely large piles of filthy lucre also substitutes for Spanish Fly for fugly guys and vapid gold digging a lot of women.

/Only slightly bitter


FTFY
 
2014-01-11 04:55:15 PM

BigLuca: Oldiron_79: BigLuca: Question: What are the financial ramifications of being ugly but hung like a moose?

Answer: I'll tell ya in five years.

As an ugly but hung guy, your odds of getting laid on a given night at the bar are about the same as an ugly guy with a small cawk.

Well thank god I was just kidding.  I'm actually hung like a gerbil.


Then you have a chance to score with one of the rich & famous...if you're "into" Richard Gere.
 
2014-01-11 04:55:40 PM
 
2014-01-11 04:56:43 PM
In the abstract, I'd probably be doing alright. But, I have this thing where I look broody and pissed-off, even when I'm smiling.

/which I never do.
//Because I'm broody and pissed-off.
 
2014-01-11 05:00:39 PM
www.mbird.com
 
2014-01-11 05:08:23 PM
FTA : Paying for pulchritude isn't limited to Wall Street


I'm too ridiculously good looking to know what pulchritude means.
 
2014-01-11 05:11:11 PM

Driver: BigLuca: Oldiron_79: BigLuca: Question: What are the financial ramifications of being ugly but hung like a moose?

Answer: I'll tell ya in five years.

As an ugly but hung guy, your odds of getting laid on a given night at the bar are about the same as an ugly guy with a small cawk.

Well thank god I was just kidding.  I'm actually hung like a gerbil.

Then you have a chance to score with one of the rich & famous...if you're "into" Richard Gere.


No thanks, that guy looks like a giant arsehole from my perspective.  It's the same crappy story over and over: he gets a little anal puts pressure on you from all directions, you have no wiggle room, and turns the relationship into a shiatty mess.

/please note the colon
 
2014-01-11 05:11:58 PM
Better ugly than fat.
 
2014-01-11 05:19:21 PM

BigLuca: Question: What are the financial ramifications of being ugly but hung like a moose?

Answer: I'll tell ya in five years.


AIDS.
 
2014-01-11 05:21:03 PM

macadamnut: [www.mbird.com image 400x598]


White? Really? I hate white cars. Only vehicles that should be white are limos, government and business vehicles (it's a lot easier to put your name/logo on a white background).

/yes i know that's 26 min guy
 
2014-01-11 05:32:19 PM

Shrink: I'm no bog troll, but during the vast majority of my work and client interactions I'm usually wearing ratty boxer shorts and a stained white t-shirt and I haven't showered or shaved; on several occasions I've conducted conference calls with CEO's and Medical Directors of major healthcare organizations (I'm looking at you Blue Cross Blue Shield) while sitting on the toilet taking a shiat.

/just have to remember to hit "mute" before the kerplunk
//works from home
///makes good money despite average looks



You know when women say that looks or money don't matter as much as intelligence and humor? It's all true.

Now excuse me while I sneak out the window. It seems like a group of women have lined up outside my house -- again. Come on, please let me rest. I'm only one man!
 
2014-01-11 05:39:37 PM
I grew up wanting to look like Gomez Addams, but instead I look like Uncle Fester.

/Was once asked if I was Paul Giamatti.
 
2014-01-11 05:43:13 PM
Why yes, with my awesome gray highlights and magnificent handlebar mustache, I am quite financially secure, of course...
 
2014-01-11 06:05:23 PM

baconbeard: Better ugly than fat.


Yes, but I'll be sober in the morning.
 
2014-01-11 06:25:39 PM
I was blessed(cursed) with large sweater pups at a very early age, and in no time at all, no one took me seriously.  I had long blonde hair, and with these distractions, it was assumed I had the IQ of a turnip.  It took me a few years to figure out to turn it to my advantage, and my 30's were my glory years.  Seriously, kicking ass and taking names.

Alas, I got old, gravity and gray hair is taking over.  Now, people look me in the eye and flinch.  Good thing I married someone who could benefit from a seeing eye dog.
 
2014-01-11 06:28:53 PM
Snarfangel:

You know when women say that looks or money don't matter as much as intelligence and humor? It's all true.

Now excuse me while I sneak out the window. It seems like a group of women have lined up outside my house -- again. Come on, please let me rest. I'm only one man!


At the gym a few weeks ago I saw a Garth Algar-looking dude (yes, complete with glasses) wearing a t-shirt that said, "Ladies, one at a time please." You might need one of those.
 
2014-01-11 06:41:51 PM
I would benefit from getting a little more sunlight, but my puny muscles rebel against climbing the stairs out of my basement. I wish I could report that I wasn't really poor, but, alas, I don't even have a working refrigerator and have to wash my Cheetos down with room temperature Mountain Dew. Thankfully my girlfriend (she's from Canada, you don't know her) loves me the way I am. I used to be quite wealthy, but I mistakenly bought some Adidas from Amazon and my fortune disappeared.
 
2014-01-11 09:09:36 PM

cherryl taggart: I was blessed(cursed) with large sweater pups at a very early age, and in no time at all, no one took me seriously.  I had long blonde hair, and with these distractions, it was assumed I had the IQ of a turnip.  It took me a few years to figure out to turn it to my advantage, and my 30's were my glory years.  Seriously, kicking ass and taking names.

Alas, I got old, gravity and gray hair is taking over.  Now, people look me in the eye and flinch.  Good thing I married someone who could benefit from a seeing eye dog.


Similar to you (but as a man), I was genetically blessed with a very stout muscular figure and an easy on the eyes appearance.  At a youthful age I amassed quite a healthy bank account and enjoyed the fruits.

I broke my neck and was laid up for over a year, gained weight and lost a bit of my drive (temporarily).

Quickly discovered the truth behind the facade and have never looked back.

Married an ugly woman and I bless her with the gifts this world has to offer.

Happier that a pig in shiat.
 
2014-01-11 10:12:04 PM
If our economy can be effected by the way a CEO looks then we are truly farked
 
2014-01-11 11:05:46 PM
Because looks are everything.
www.comicalcreatures.com
 
2014-01-11 11:06:35 PM

cherryl taggart: Alas, I got old, gravity and gray hair is taking over.  Now, people look me in the eye and flinch.  Good thing I married someone who could benefit from a seeing eye dog.


That's why our eyesight goes as we get older. It helps preserve our happy memories.
 
2014-01-11 11:33:04 PM

cherryl taggart: I was blessed(cursed) with large sweater pups at a very early age, and in no time at all, no one took me seriously.  I had long blonde hair, and with these distractions, it was assumed I had the IQ of a turnip.  It took me a few years to figure out to turn it to my advantage, and my 30's were my glory years.  Seriously, kicking ass and taking names.

Alas, I got old, gravity and gray hair is taking over.  Now, people look me in the eye and flinch.  Good thing I married someone who could benefit from a seeing eye dog.


"Seeing Eye" is a copyrighted phrase that can only be used when referring to dogs trained at "The Seeing Eye" organization in Morristown, New Jersey. The correct term is "guide dog."
 
2014-01-12 03:30:07 AM

macadamnut: [www.mbird.com image 400x598]


Is that the guy who has to be at the gym in 26 minutes?
 
2014-01-12 06:46:05 AM
i305.photobucket.com
 
2014-01-12 09:28:05 AM

HillshirefarmsGOMEAT: "Seeing Eye" is a copyrighted phraseregistered trademark that can only be used when referring to dogs trained at "The Seeing Eye" organization in Morristown, New Jersey. The correct term is "guide dog."


FTFY.   Also, why are you protecting trademarks in obscure discussion forums late on a Saturday night?
 
2014-01-12 11:51:15 AM

Autistic Hiker: HillshirefarmsGOMEAT: "Seeing Eye" is a copyrighted phraseregistered trademark that can only be used when referring to dogs trained at "The Seeing Eye" organization in Morristown, New Jersey. The correct term is "guide dog."

FTFY.   Also, why are you protecting trademarks in obscure discussion forums late on a Saturday night?


Because I'm a nerd, and a bored one at that.
 
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