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(Huffington Post)   Even after Cooch was licked, Virginia Republican vows to pass law banning consensual oral sex   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 128
    More: Dumbass, Eugene Volokh, crimes against nature, Cooch, pass laws, Cuccinelli, Virginia Law, UCLA School of Law, dockets  
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5092 clicks; posted to Politics » on 11 Jan 2014 at 8:54 AM (41 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



128 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-01-11 12:16:22 AM  
The party of "smaller government" strikes again.
 
2014-01-11 01:16:43 AM  
Looks like they found their replacement for Governor Ultrasound.
 
2014-01-11 02:57:03 AM  
A laser-like focus on jobs.
 
2014-01-11 03:38:08 AM  
C'mon.  Any Republican will tell you it's hotter when it's wrong.
 
2014-01-11 06:33:28 AM  
Wait until his boyfriend finds out.
 
2014-01-11 07:46:36 AM  

LIGAFF: A laser-like focus on jobs anus.

 
2014-01-11 08:38:51 AM  
Yes, because banning it will certainly stop teens from having oral sex.

Dear GOP,

This is why you are considered to be a bunch of idiots.

Thank you,

America
 
2014-01-11 08:45:41 AM  
So you're saying that teenagers should only have the kind of sex that can result in pregnancy?
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2014-01-11 08:48:37 AM  

Sybarite: So you're saying that teenagers should only have the kind of sex that can result in pregnancy?


It doesn't result in pregnancy, it just results in having to go live with grandma for a year.
 
2014-01-11 08:48:44 AM  

LIGAFF: A laser-like focus on jobs.


Sodomy Tsar would technically be a job.
 
2014-01-11 08:57:49 AM  
One more asinine Republican story to go to make this a trifecta....
 
2014-01-11 08:59:25 AM  
Out in the convenience stores, they're wearing camouflage jackets and coveralls.
It's rural Virginia, buncha backwards farks.
 
2014-01-11 09:00:14 AM  
According to an "impact statement" accompanying this new bill, limiting the proscriptions to non-adults is an attempt to get around the due process problems.

So the Virginia GOP thinks teenagers don't have equal rights under the 14th Amendment?

Sorry, that was a silly question.  Teenagers are obviously just one of the many groups of people they think don't deserve equal rights.
 
2014-01-11 09:01:11 AM  

nekom: LIGAFF: A laser-like focus on jobs.

Sodomy Tsar would technically be a job.


I would put that on my resume with pride.
 
2014-01-11 09:02:37 AM  
They do seem to enjoy having their minds in the gutter.
 
2014-01-11 09:03:28 AM  
In defense of Virginia Republicans, no one else has signed on to co-sponsor or even support the bill. This guy seems to have a fixation.
 
2014-01-11 09:06:47 AM  

nekom: LIGAFF: A laser-like focus on jobs.

Sodomy Tsar would technically be a job.


Great band name as an opening act for Pussy Riot too.
 
2014-01-11 09:06:51 AM  

The way Republicans protest about sex so much, it reminds me of the kind of people that protest beauty pageants...


vid.alarabiya.net



The louder the protests, the more we all know it's because you'd fail at it if you tried.

Why do conservatives advertise their shortcomings so readily like this? It just leaves them open to ridicule. Ridicule they're impotent to address.
 
2014-01-11 09:16:58 AM  
Another raging closeted politician who spends his evenings furiously masturbating in shame to the thought of young men having oral sex.

They still gonna do it, dude.
 
2014-01-11 09:20:45 AM  
oh, FFS, draft a law that prohibits adults engaging in sexual conduct with underage persons, clarify a Romeo and Juliet exception for borderline cases, and be done with it.


Oh wait, you guys managed to block that one because all you can think about is punishing the gays.
 
2014-01-11 09:21:04 AM  
This thread needs more facepalm images. It's the only response to something this idiotic.
 
2014-01-11 09:21:56 AM  
"The kids are all libby Democrats anyway, so fark 'em."

The GOP voter outreach continues unabated.
 
2014-01-11 09:22:08 AM  

slayer199: Yes, because banning it will certainly stop teens from having oral sex.

Dear GOP,

This is why you are considered to be a bunch of idiots.

Thank you,

America


Who mopped up the floor in house races when running a RINO for president, against massive vote fraud. What do you think will happen when we run a real Republican.
 
2014-01-11 09:24:15 AM  
What's the over/under on how many weeks till this imbecile is caught at a glory hole at a Richmond truck stop?
 
2014-01-11 09:24:34 AM  

snowshovel: Who mopped up the floor in house races when running a RINO for president, against massive vote fraud. What do you think will happen when we run a real Republican.


That looks like English, but makes no sense whatsoever.
 
2014-01-11 09:24:55 AM  

snowshovel: Who mopped up the floor in house races when running a RINO for president, against massive vote fraud. What do you think will happen when we run a real Republican.


That's cute. It's a Fark Libertariantm trying to make a name for itself.

Is it true that every time Rush Limbaugh passes gas on a teenage boy, one of you gets a new login?
 
2014-01-11 09:29:21 AM  

snowshovel: What do you think will happen when we run a real Republican.


You'll get your ass handed to you and immediately have your minitruthers rewrite the past so that you were just running a RINO and wait until you run a real Republican....

And so it goes.
 
2014-01-11 09:33:19 AM  

snowshovel: Who mopped up the floor in house races when running a RINO for president, against massive vote fraud. What do you think will happen when we run a real Republican.


Okay, so, assuming that you can find such a thing, and that they win, traditionally the legislative would go the other way, you guys are funny balance wise that way.  Might take 'til mid terms, but it nearly always happens.

Who is this RINO of whom you speak?
And this massive voter fraud thing, I'm sure you have examples?
 
2014-01-11 09:37:58 AM  

snowshovel: slayer199: Yes, because banning it will certainly stop teens from having oral sex.

Dear GOP,

This is why you are considered to be a bunch of idiots.

Thank you,

America

Who mopped up the floor in house races when running a RINO for president, against massive vote fraud. What do you think will happen when we run a real Republican.


Please name one "real Republican".
 
2014-01-11 09:38:05 AM  

nekom: LIGAFF: A laser-like focus on jobs.

Sodomy Tsar would technically be a job.


And a good name for an opening act for The Dismemberment Plan.
 
2014-01-11 09:39:12 AM  

sno man: snowshovel: Who mopped up the floor in house races when running a RINO for president, against massive vote fraud. What do you think will happen when we run a real Republican.

Okay, so, assuming that you can find such a thing, and that they win, traditionally the legislative would go the other way, you guys are funny balance wise that way.  Might take 'til mid terms, but it nearly always happens.

Who is this RINO of whom you speak?
And this massive voter fraud thing, I'm sure you have examples?



Well, the RINO's son did have business dealings with the company that made a lot of voting machines. His name was Tagg or Bagg or Bort or Tunk or Spat or Grok or Bapp or Tarp or Bloop or Wank or Wax or Pap or something like that.
 
2014-01-11 09:41:24 AM  
Sorry, my mistake. Pap ran the smear campaign.
 
2014-01-11 09:42:10 AM  

Epic Fap Session: Please name one "real Republican".


Dubya (1999-2007): "real Republican"
Dubya (2008-present): RINO statist

/this is what Fark LibertardiansTM truly believe
 
2014-01-11 09:43:56 AM  

pueblonative: Epic Fap Session: Please name one "real Republican".

Dubya (1999-2007): "real Republican"
Dubya (2008-present): RINO statist

/this is what Fark LibertardiansTM truly believe


Also see Mitch McConnell pre- and post- 2013 debt ceiling crisis
 
2014-01-11 09:44:17 AM  
If that pic doesn't scream "I THINK COCKS IN MY ASS ARE COOL" I don't know what does.
 
2014-01-11 09:46:15 AM  
WTF is wrong with Republicans?
 
2014-01-11 09:50:37 AM  

Leishu: snowshovel: Who mopped up the floor in house races when running a RINO for president, against massive vote fraud. What do you think will happen when we run a real Republican.

That's cute. It's a Fark Libertariantm trying to make a name for itself.

Is it true that every time Rush Limbaugh passes gas on a teenage boy, one of you gets a new login?


And people wonder why the youth of today seems so farked up.
 
2014-01-11 09:51:19 AM  
I view this the same way I view abortion.

I'm a man, so I'll never have an abortion so I don't have anything to say about it, but I completely support any woman's right to make all decisions regarding reproductive rights and her body herself.

As far as sex acts are concerned, even if it's not my cup of tea, I don't think I should be trying to decide or dictate who sticks what where or who licks whose body part or what body part they want to lick, stick, or flick. That's a private, personal decision.

Fark the politicians who want to dictate permissible bedroom behavior or women's health issues.
This is a free country, so fark off and let people be free.
 
2014-01-11 09:52:57 AM  
Great headline.
 
2014-01-11 09:55:45 AM  

Apos: One more asinine Republican story to go to make this a trifecta....


There is a trifecta every day.  Usually a hat trick of trifectas (9 total, for the math challenged).
 
2014-01-11 09:55:55 AM  
So the law is that anyone that performs or receives oral sex is guilty of a felony?  But not consenting adults.  So wait, they're basically writing the law that would make felons out of minors?
 
2014-01-11 10:01:02 AM  

Epic Fap Session: snowshovel: slayer199: Yes, because banning it will certainly stop teens from having oral sex.

Dear GOP,

This is why you are considered to be a bunch of idiots.

Thank you,

America

Who mopped up the floor in house races when running a RINO for president, against massive vote fraud. What do you think will happen when we run a real Republican.

Please name one "real Republican".


Weedlord Bonerhitler.
 
2014-01-11 10:02:14 AM  

Semantic Warrior: So the law is that anyone that performs or receives oral sex is guilty of a felony?  But not consenting adults.  So wait, they're basically writing the law that would make felons out of minors?


There looks to be a consent element too, so as long as neither party consented everyone is good.  TAA DAA!
 
2014-01-11 10:03:39 AM  

HotIgneous Intruder: [I am a person who believes in common sense and personal freedom]


Looks like we've got a new addition to the LOPCATGOPATA.
 
2014-01-11 10:04:59 AM  

sno man: Semantic Warrior: So the law is that anyone that performs or receives oral sex is guilty of a felony?  But not consenting adults.  So wait, they're basically writing the law that would make felons out of minors?

There looks to be a consent element too, so as long as neither party consented everyone is good.  TAA DAA!


i18.photobucket.com
 
2014-01-11 10:11:02 AM  
Gay sex for adult: legal and constitutionally protected.Gay sex for minors: felony and lands you on a sex offender registry for life.It's a special kind of Republican stupid where minors face longer jail sentences than adults for committing the exact same 'crime'.
 
2014-01-11 10:12:42 AM  
Lawrence v Texas invalidated these laws explicitly on 14th-amendment grounds.  It's not possible to re-institute them without, y'know, getting another constitutional amendment passed.

Sorry, bud, no dice on this one.
 
2014-01-11 10:27:08 AM  
sound more like what he doing is a work around.  by just saying its anyone under 18 who can't do these.  He is trying to make it so as these teens grow up they think these things are off limits and don't do them when they become adults.  Even if this passes everything it would backfire so bad its not going be funny
 
2014-01-11 10:28:49 AM  
I'm not speaking as a partisan here because in all seriousness, Republicans are farked in the head.
 
2014-01-11 10:29:08 AM  

jumac: sound more like what he doing is a work around.  by just saying its anyone under 18 who can't do these.  He is trying to make it so as these teens grow up they think these things are off limits and don't do them when they become adults.  Even if this passes everything it would backfire so bad its not going be funny


I know. This will be as much of a deterrent as making the legal drinking age 21. Because we all know, no one ever tried to drink alcohol before their 21st birthday.

I think the dude just can't stop fantasizing about having sex with minors.
 
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