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(Daily Mail)   "I was kidnapped by lap dancers wearing miniskirts, stilettos and Daisy Duke shorts"   ( ) divider line
    More: Strange, Bristol Crown Court, lap dancers  
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10373 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jan 2014 at 3:04 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-01-10 04:41:47 PM  
1 vote:
You've told us that sir.

NOW, what were the kidnappers wearing?
2014-01-10 03:36:14 PM  
1 vote:
Heh, that style of writing made me laugh.  Dry British humor.

The alleged victim says: They threatened me with a knife, made me get in a car, beat me, and took my watch and money.

The alleged perps say: He got in the car of his own free will, and we didn't threaten or beat him ... though we DID beat him, but it was because he mocked one of our girlfriends so that's okay, not to threaten him ..I mean we did have a knife and we did pull it out infront of him while beating him so that he could describe it's type ... but he just gave us the watch and his money for no reason - that's why we stuck the watch in our ass, because that's what you do with nice watches people give you for no reason - and also look, he likes money, don't he! There! He's guilty then, clearly, and we're innocent, and we want thousands of dollars for breaking a contract that got his business shut down.  A movie says so, doesn't it, cause he likes money so he's obviously the criminal.

I'm really surprised their lawyer isn't being sent to jail for wasting the court's time.
2014-01-10 03:24:14 PM  
1 vote:
in case we are still unclear as to the proper direction of this thread
2014-01-10 03:22:33 PM  
1 vote:
or the classics, for historical perspective
2014-01-10 03:20:31 PM  
1 vote:
this headline has a lot of potential.  let's tune in to see how farkers react

DoctorOfLove: [ image 463x437]

sweet jesus

eyebleach stat!!
2014-01-10 03:12:38 PM  
1 vote:
So how much did he pay for this service, and was it worth it?
2014-01-10 02:49:38 PM  
1 vote:
He described his Brietling watch, later found in the anus of Alexander Morris, as his 'pride and joy'.

That entire story is comedy gold
2014-01-10 02:47:37 PM  
1 vote:
"That's my story and I'm sticking to it!"
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