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(Pro Football Talk)   Johhny Manziel files his application to be the fall-guy for the Houston Texans next season   (profootballtalk.nbcsports.com ) divider line
    More: Obvious, Johnny Manziel, Texans, Johhny Manziel, NFL Draft, Manti Te, fools, Gil Brandt  
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980 clicks; posted to Sports » on 08 Jan 2014 at 2:36 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



208 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2014-01-08 03:07:36 PM  

chapman: EqualOpportunityEnslaver: Grand_Moff_Joseph: The_Sponge: Grand_Moff_Joseph: He'll know he's made it big time when people start burning his jersey in the parking lot.  XD


Or when Matt Schaub burgers are taken off the menu and replaced with Johnny Football burgers.

I'd like a Johnnyception with cheese, and an order of pick-six fries to go.

*and since we're referring to Texas*

"...oh, and a coke."

Cashier: What type of coke would you like?

"Mt. Dew please."

Grew up in Houston, and that order is so true.

To be truly authentic, the order needs to follow up with

"what vegetables would you like on the side?

"Cornbread and macaroni and cheese."


Indeed
 
2014-01-08 03:07:38 PM  

HaywoodJablonski: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Maybe the greatest NCAA quarterback ever. At least top three all time in the entertaining department.


That boy is going to get hurt in the NFL.

He's Doug Flutie 2.0. I think he'll not only land on his feet but excel as an NFL QB


Don't you dare desecrate the memory of Doug Flutie by comparing Johnny Fraudball to him.  If anything, Manziel is like Favre but without the arm or the size.  The only thing he has in common with Flutie is his height.
 
2014-01-08 03:07:51 PM  

EqualOpportunityEnslaver: ongbok: I would rather have his receivers at TAM. Those guys are the ones that made him look so good. After he ran around the backfield and chucked the ball in the air up for grabs, those guys were the ones going up and fight off the DB's to get the ball.

Glad someone else noticed that too


You could also argue that the defense's need to spy/focus on Manziel constantly puts his receivers in single coverage. That said, Mike Evans is a stud and could probably make me look good at QB ... and I can't throw for shiat!
 
2014-01-08 03:08:35 PM  

AdmirableSnackbar: HaywoodJablonski: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Maybe the greatest NCAA quarterback ever. At least top three all time in the entertaining department.


That boy is going to get hurt in the NFL.

He's Doug Flutie 2.0. I think he'll not only land on his feet but excel as an NFL QB

Don't you dare desecrate the memory of Doug Flutie by comparing Johnny Fraudball to him.  If anything, Manziel is like Favre but without the arm or the size.  The only thing he has in common with Flutie is his height.


See?
 
2014-01-08 03:08:59 PM  

lecavalier: Ivandrago: What is he? 5'10'' and 175lbs? He's going to get crushed the first time he holds on to the ball too long trying to create some of his Johnny Football magic.

Why do people think he is that small?  I am a bartender in a sports bar so I talk about college football a lot and I have never met one person that realizes he is 6'1, 210. And even if you want to call that program weight, then he is 6'0/200. Nobody is even close when guessing how big he is.


Because that's what teams do. South Carolina did it all year with Connor Shaw. Listing him as 6'1 209. It's hard to call someone 6'1 when they're barely two inches taller than the 5'9 running back they're standing next to.
 
2014-01-08 03:09:28 PM  

EqualOpportunityEnslaver: ongbok: I would rather have his receivers at TAM. Those guys are the ones that made him look so good. After he ran around the backfield and chucked the ball in the air up for grabs, those guys were the ones going up and fight off the DB's to get the ball.

Glad someone else noticed that too


Glad somebody else noticed also, thought I was the only one.
 
2014-01-08 03:09:45 PM  

lecavalier: GardenWeasel: lecavalier: As has been spoken about on various blogs/forums, I would not be surprised to see the Texans call New England and get Mallett.

Houston has already said they would consider trading away the 1st pick. Ya never know.

I don't think he warrants a first round pick, but I'm sure New England wouldn't argue.


God no. They trade the 1st to someone else for a buttload of picks, and use some lower pick to grab Mallett
 
2014-01-08 03:10:03 PM  

lecavalier: Why do people think he is that small? I am a bartender in a sports bar so I talk about college football a lot and I have never met one person that realizes he is 6'1, 210. And even if you want to call that program weight, then he is 6'0/200. Nobody is even close when guessing how big he is.


That's because he is standing next to giants. For some reason people think they are as large as the line men there for the running backs and QB are shorter than they are.

I don't know why but it is something I've noticed
 
2014-01-08 03:10:48 PM  

IlGreven: fmcgalaxie500: I certainly hope not. Teddy Bridgewater or Blake Bortles

More likely, Manziel will be the next QB to be added to this famous jersey:

[cdn.bleacherreport.net image 599x600]


Missing Jason Campbell
 
2014-01-08 03:11:10 PM  
Doug Flutie 2 Electric Boogaloo
 
2014-01-08 03:11:20 PM  

ShadowKamui: RumsfeldsReplacement: Just stop it Subby, we all know the Browns will draft Manziel and it will be hilarious.

Outside chance they get Vick instead, but getting washed up Eagles QBs is more of a Vikings things


You could leave "Eagles" out of that sentence and still be 100% correct.

/has a sad because I'm a Vikings fan
 
2014-01-08 03:11:35 PM  

ongbok: chapman: There is already a draft Johnny movement going in Houston.  http://www.draftjohnnymanziel.com/

You know if they don't draft him they are going to have a backlash like the Pacers did when they drafted Reggie Miller instead of Steve Alford.


Yeah, and since the Texans FO doesn't have the IQ of a potato (Ed Reed notwithstanding), they'll ignore that backlash.  Then, a few years later, they'll be sitting smug watching all of the people who bashed their draft choices eating crow a-la JJ Watt and Mario Williams.  They've been here before, and they've got no problems ignoring the idiots in the fanbase because they know those idiots will shut up when the team starts performing.
 
2014-01-08 03:11:35 PM  

Ivandrago: lecavalier: Ivandrago: What is he? 5'10'' and 175lbs? He's going to get crushed the first time he holds on to the ball too long trying to create some of his Johnny Football magic.

Why do people think he is that small?  I am a bartender in a sports bar so I talk about college football a lot and I have never met one person that realizes he is 6'1, 210. And even if you want to call that program weight, then he is 6'0/200. Nobody is even close when guessing how big he is.

Because that's what teams do. South Carolina did it all year with Connor Shaw. Listing him as 6'1 209. It's hard to call someone 6'1 when they're barely two inches taller than the 5'9 running back they're standing next to.


Well, I don't know what to say because this is impossible to argue about. If you want to say that is his program weight, then what can I say? I will just respond that with my eyeballs that I use to watch him on TV, I don't see a lie in 6'1/210.
 
2014-01-08 03:12:50 PM  

scottydoesntknow: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 229x188]

/Seriously, keep that prima donna douche away from my Texans


Yeah no, he's a project.  I know some GM/front office guy is going to convince themselves to think this guy can play week 1; he's got a better arm than Tebow but that's about it.
 
2014-01-08 03:14:13 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: lecavalier: Why do people think he is that small? I am a bartender in a sports bar so I talk about college football a lot and I have never met one person that realizes he is 6'1, 210. And even if you want to call that program weight, then he is 6'0/200. Nobody is even close when guessing how big he is.

That's because he is standing next to giants. For some reason people think they are as large as the line men there for the running backs and QB are shorter than they are.

I don't know why but it is something I've noticed


I'm sure he'll get an invite to the combine. We'll just have to wait and see how he measures up. I remember we used to say Alshon Jeffery was 6'4. At the combine he didn't even make it to 6'3.
 
2014-01-08 03:14:52 PM  

RumsfeldsReplacement: Just stop it Subby, we all know the Browns will draft Manziel and it will be hilarious.


Nah, the Browns will go for Bortles. Bortles is "still learning" and "has a lot of potential," which means none of that is true and he'll be McCoy/Weeden 2.0
 
2014-01-08 03:14:59 PM  

HaywoodJablonski: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Maybe the greatest NCAA quarterback ever. At least top three all time in the entertaining department.


That boy is going to get hurt in the NFL.

He's Doug Flutie 2.0. I think he'll not only land on his feet but excel as an NFL QB


In a year or two...not right now.
 
2014-01-08 03:15:23 PM  

Ivandrago: The Stealth Hippopotamus: lecavalier: Why do people think he is that small? I am a bartender in a sports bar so I talk about college football a lot and I have never met one person that realizes he is 6'1, 210. And even if you want to call that program weight, then he is 6'0/200. Nobody is even close when guessing how big he is.

That's because he is standing next to giants. For some reason people think they are as large as the line men there for the running backs and QB are shorter than they are.

I don't know why but it is something I've noticed

I'm sure he'll get an invite to the combine. We'll just have to wait and see how he measures up. I remember we used to say Alshon Jeffery was 6'4. At the combine he didn't even make it to 6'3.


We've all seen Jeffery play this year and I feel confident in saying that he is 7'4" with 52" hands.
 
2014-01-08 03:17:49 PM  

Rwa2play: he's got a better arm than Tebow but that's about it.


I actually think Tebow's got a better arm. I'm not sure I've ever seen Manziel make an "NFL throw" that wasn't a wounded duck. If he's a 1st round pick, predicting him to be a bust might be the easiest prediction of the entire round.
 
2014-01-08 03:18:08 PM  

Rwa2play: HaywoodJablonski: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Maybe the greatest NCAA quarterback ever. At least top three all time in the entertaining department.


That boy is going to get hurt in the NFL.

He's Doug Flutie 2.0. I think he'll not only land on his feet but excel as an NFL QB

In a year or two...not right now.


I'm ok with that
 
2014-01-08 03:18:51 PM  

lecavalier: Ivandrago: lecavalier: Ivandrago: What is he? 5'10'' and 175lbs? He's going to get crushed the first time he holds on to the ball too long trying to create some of his Johnny Football magic.

Why do people think he is that small?  I am a bartender in a sports bar so I talk about college football a lot and I have never met one person that realizes he is 6'1, 210. And even if you want to call that program weight, then he is 6'0/200. Nobody is even close when guessing how big he is.

Because that's what teams do. South Carolina did it all year with Connor Shaw. Listing him as 6'1 209. It's hard to call someone 6'1 when they're barely two inches taller than the 5'9 running back they're standing next to.

Well, I don't know what to say because this is impossible to argue about. If you want to say that is his program weight, then what can I say? I will just respond that with my eyeballs that I use to watch him on TV, I don't see a lie in 6'1/210.


Either way, he doesn't have prototypical NFL QB height and his NCAA-level elusiveness won't translate to the NFL because he's not big enough and not fast enough, and his arm isn't good enough for teams to wait it out while he figures out how to play at the next level.  He might - might - stick it out as a backup, but I doubt he'll last in the NFL through his rookie deal.
 
2014-01-08 03:19:46 PM  
lecavalier:We've all seen Jeffery play this year and I feel confident in saying that he is 7'4" with 52" hands.

I'm so happy to see he's excelling.
You always want your guys to do well and South Carolina fans were pissed that he fell to the 2nd round because he was thought to be "fat and slow" and we knew he was a stud. It's not his fault his QB forgot how to throw the ball.

/I don't think I'll be able to pick him in the 12th round of my fantasy draft next year.
 
2014-01-08 03:24:39 PM  

NEDM: because they know those idiots will shut up when the team starts performing.


Until they start losing, that is. I listen to Fred Faour and A.J. Hoffman's show quite a bit and they just hang up if anyone mentions VY or Keenum or Cowher/Gruden, which is quite a bit. Honestly, I don't know why sports radio doesn't just do away with call ins, since they never say anything insightful or ask a question that doesn't gives you a migraine.
 
2014-01-08 03:24:45 PM  
As a Husker (not a student but family of former alumni) I got to see him mutilate the Husker defense for a half before Dennard jumped him and got them both tossed.  He is a monster and I love seeing receivers work like him,
 
2014-01-08 03:24:53 PM  

HaywoodJablonski: Rwa2play: HaywoodJablonski: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Maybe the greatest NCAA quarterback ever. At least top three all time in the entertaining department.


That boy is going to get hurt in the NFL.

He's Doug Flutie 2.0. I think he'll not only land on his feet but excel as an NFL QB

In a year or two...not right now.

I'm ok with that


There's your problem:  You, me and several others see him as good a year or two down the line.  I could see it with RGIII when he came out that he can be a week 1 starter.  Not with JM.
 
2014-01-08 03:26:04 PM  

The_Sponge: Grand_Moff_Joseph: The_Sponge: Grand_Moff_Joseph: He'll know he's made it big time when people start burning his jersey in the parking lot.  XD


Or when Matt Schaub burgers are taken off the menu and replaced with Johnny Football burgers.

I'd like a Johnnyception with cheese, and an order of pick-six fries to go.

*and since we're referring to Texas*

"...oh, and a coke."

Cashier: What type of coke would you like?

"Mt. Dew please."


Heh.

But seriously....people need to stop calling all sodas "Coke".....it's annoying.  That would be like calling all beers "Budweiser" or "Bud".

"I'll have a Budweiser."

"What kind?"

"Guinness."

/And that's what really grinds my gears.


I have lived all over the south and in texas my entire life and have never heard anybody do that.  When people say they want a coke.  That is what they are looking for.  A Coca-cola.  If they don't have that, then they might be offered a pepsi.  or some other drink.  In texas, usually a dr pepper.  But nobody ever asks for a coke and expects a dr. pepper.  It flat out never happens.
 
2014-01-08 03:26:26 PM  
What's his status on signing autographs now? I know he wasn't signing them during that football game but I hope he's signing autographs again. I want to get one before that little squirt is smooshed by some 400 lb. defensive lineman.

/His entire NFL career will be spent impersonating Dark Helmet and running the "Hide the Midget" play
 
2014-01-08 03:26:35 PM  
Dear Vikings,

Hire Mike Zimmer, draft Johnny Football.

Thanks.
 
2014-01-08 03:27:54 PM  
I want him on the Vikings. The thought of him and Peterson together is very Sports Entertaining for me.
 
2014-01-08 03:30:12 PM  
ESPN bobbleheads seen buying lots of Chapstick and knee pads.  Stephen A Smith and his b*tch Skip Bayliss fighting over who's first.

/ meanwhile Jonny Manziel is in Canton OH having his bust cast of his H.O.F. induction.

// Tim Tebow thankful that he's out of the spotlight...... until NEXT SEASON baby !!!
 
2014-01-08 03:30:41 PM  
He's going to Oakland, where he'll get fat and fail.
 
2014-01-08 03:31:59 PM  
He'll learn that suicide is painless, it brings on many changes, and I can take or leave it, if I please.
 
2014-01-08 03:32:28 PM  

HeathenHealer: I want him on the Vikings. The thought of him and Peterson together is very Sports Entertaining for me.


Hope he enjoys playing in sub-zero weather in December.
 
2014-01-08 03:32:47 PM  
Aggie fan here:  Manziel was one of the greatest college football players of all time.  This year, he had better stats than Jameis Winston against tougher competition (even if you include the two down games Manziel had at the end of the season when he was nursing an injury).

If he's going to make it in the NFL, he has to a) accept a lot of coaching, and b) be ready to sit for a couple of years behind a veteran.

I don't think he's any less mature than your typical 20 year old, but I guess time will tell.  It's got to be hard to keep your head about you when everybody is telling you you're a god.

plcow: But nobody ever asks for a coke and expects a dr. pepper.  It flat out never happens.


It happens all the time here in Texas.
 
2014-01-08 03:33:31 PM  
Johnny Fartball sucks. He will never make it, in fact he will fail miserably. So many dumb farkers out there.
 
2014-01-08 03:33:42 PM  
How will Johnny D-Bag adjust to the pay cut of playing in the NFL?
 
2014-01-08 03:34:54 PM  
Thread seems to be missing something ...

guyism.com

There, that's better.
 
2014-01-08 03:35:15 PM  

HaywoodJablonski: RumsfeldsReplacement: Just stop it Subby, we all know the Browns will draft Manziel and it will be hilarious.

Nah, the Browns will go for Bortles. Bortles is "still learning" and "has a lot of potential," which means none of that is true and he'll be McCoy/Weeden 2.0


Hey now, Weeden didn't have any potential. After all, he was already older than the guy he was replacing.
 
2014-01-08 03:35:21 PM  

Cowboy Spencer: Aggie fan here:  Manziel was one of the greatest college football players of all time.   This year, he had better stats than Jameis Winston against tougher competition (even if you include the two down games Manziel had at the end of the season when he was nursing an injury).

If he's going to make it in the NFL, he has to a) accept a lot of coaching, and b) be ready to sit for a couple of years behind a veteran.

I don't think he's any less mature than your typical 20 year old, but I guess time will tell.  It's got to be hard to keep your head about you when everybody is telling you you're a god.

plcow: But nobody ever asks for a coke and expects a dr. pepper.  It flat out never happens.

It happens all the time here in Texas.


I hate when people trot this out. They all seem to forget that Winston rarely played past halfway through the third quarter.
 
2014-01-08 03:35:55 PM  

plcow: The_Sponge: Grand_Moff_Joseph: The_Sponge: Grand_Moff_Joseph: He'll know he's made it big time when people start burning his jersey in the parking lot.  XD


Or when Matt Schaub burgers are taken off the menu and replaced with Johnny Football burgers.

I'd like a Johnnyception with cheese, and an order of pick-six fries to go.

*and since we're referring to Texas*

"...oh, and a coke."

Cashier: What type of coke would you like?

"Mt. Dew please."


Heh.

But seriously....people need to stop calling all sodas "Coke".....it's annoying.  That would be like calling all beers "Budweiser" or "Bud".

"I'll have a Budweiser."

"What kind?"

"Guinness."

/And that's what really grinds my gears.

I have lived all over the south and in texas my entire life and have never heard anybody do that.  When people say they want a coke.  That is what they are looking for.  A Coca-cola.  If they don't have that, then they might be offered a pepsi.  or some other drink.  In texas, usually a dr pepper.  But nobody ever asks for a coke and expects a dr. pepper.  It flat out never happens.


[Mustacheddownsguylookingquizzical.jpg]
 
2014-01-08 03:36:40 PM  

Rwa2play: HeathenHealer: I want him on the Vikings. The thought of him and Peterson together is very Sports Entertaining for me.

Hope he enjoys playing in sub-zero weather in December.


At least it won't be a problem in January.

:(
 
2014-01-08 03:37:27 PM  
flak attack:
I have this theory about those people that speak highly of Mallett.  They are all Patriots fans that realize how terrible he has been in the few appearances he's made.  They are hoping to drum up enough interest in him that someone will be stupid enough to take them off the Patriots' hands.

If that's true obviously O'Brien won't touch him.  But I'm more of a Mallett supporter because I'd want to see him do well in the same way I'd want to see Hoyer and Cassell do well.  You're not getting a chance in New England with Brady still here.
He was drafted at 74 in the third round.  Pretending a trade did happen, there's your barometer - obviously he's not going for the first rounder - the second rounder means O'Brien means business with this guy, and the third rounder is basically Belichick doing O'Brien a favor (or vice versa).  Anything lower is either a favor (unlikely) "oh my god we're going 2-14 again"
Either way, I'm sure the Texans could do a lot better than to take an iffy quarterback with that number one pick if they can get an iffy quarterback cheaper elsewhere and strengthen another area of need.
 
2014-01-08 03:37:27 PM  

IAmRight: HaywoodJablonski: RumsfeldsReplacement: Just stop it Subby, we all know the Browns will draft Manziel and it will be hilarious.

Nah, the Browns will go for Bortles. Bortles is "still learning" and "has a lot of potential," which means none of that is true and he'll be McCoy/Weeden 2.0

Hey now, Weeden didn't have any potential. After all, he was already older than the guy he was replacing.


Good call
 
2014-01-08 03:40:15 PM  

VvonderJesus: Rwa2play: HeathenHealer: I want him on the Vikings. The thought of him and Peterson together is very Sports Entertaining for me.

Hope he enjoys playing in sub-zero weather in December.

At least it won't be a problem in January.

:(


You and I both know that's true, but you still didn't need to point it out.

:(
 
2014-01-08 03:40:36 PM  

ongbok: I hate when people trot this out. They all seem to forget that Winston rarely played past halfway through the third quarter.


I didn't forget.  I ran an analysis that showed they played roughly the same percentage of their team's plays this season.

I initially found an analysis that suggested this, but only broke it down by quarter.  Then I did my own by play, and found similar results.
 
2014-01-08 03:41:33 PM  

Cowboy Spencer: Aggie fan here: Manziel was one of the greatest college football players of all time.


Please back up this statement, Kanye.
 
2014-01-08 03:47:03 PM  
Prediction - Houston trades the pick with the Raiders for their first, a second, and Matt McGloin.  O'Brien will want nothing to do with Manziel, but Mark Davis needs to sell seats

/i'll shiat if this actually happens though
 
2014-01-08 03:47:33 PM  

AdmirableSnackbar: Please back up this statement, Kanye.


LMGTFY.

He holds the first three spots on the record books for total offense in a game in the SEC.
He holds the record for most total offense in a season in the SEC.
He holds the NCAA freshman record for total offense, and for rushing yards by a QB.
First freshman in NCAA history with 3000+ passing yards and 1000+ rushing yards in a season.
He was the fastest player in NCAA history to reach 7000 yards in total offense.

He was the first freshman to win the Heisman.  And this season, he outperformed the player who was awarded the Heisman.
 
2014-01-08 03:48:18 PM  

EqualOpportunityEnslaver: VvonderJesus:

At least it won't be a problem in January.

:(

You and I both know that's true, but you still didn't need to point it out.

:(


We'll get there in a few years when they move to 18 games
 
2014-01-08 03:49:42 PM  

HaywoodJablonski: lecavalier: HaywoodJablonski: lecavalier: As has been spoken about on various blogs/forums, I would not be surprised to see the Texans call New England and get Mallett.

*facepalm*

That makes no sense

Why not?

Because Mallett is dreadful. Have you not watched him in preseason or mop-up duty?


This.  I think Brain Hoyer showed more development during his time on the bench than Mallett has.  Though, if they do go for Mallett, I'm sure NE would be than happy to take a draft pick or three in return as they are wont to do.  Of course, all the sports hacks up here will say it's "genius".  I'm still waiting for these brilliant moves to actually pay off.

/Really wanted NE to draft Patterson and Elam last year
 
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