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(Lincoln Journal Star)   Couple gets happiest waitress at restaurant and when they ask why she's so joyful, she tells a tale that would leave most of us in the fetal position. What the couple tips her at the end of the meal is a bit dusty   (journalstar.com ) divider line
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27920 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Jan 2014 at 12:48 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-01-06 12:21:47 AM  
"I couldn't believe it. I tried to thank them, and they said, 'thank God.'"

Good on them, but I'd prefer doing a good deed in the name of Satan. Nobody ever thanks him and I think that's why he's always in such a bad mood.
 
2014-01-06 12:37:55 AM  

ultraholland: "I couldn't believe it. I tried to thank them, and they said, 'thank God.'"

Good on them, but I'd prefer doing a good deed in the name of Satan. Nobody ever thanks him and I think that's why he's always in such a bad mood.


Seems like a good place to put this. - The Oklahoma Atheist
 
2014-01-06 12:52:09 AM  
When the headline says "it gets dusty," I say "Well, fark that then," and I go read something else.
 
2014-01-06 12:52:24 AM  
There are restaurants that accept checks?

I guess there would be. I suppose in small towns and they accept local bank checks but I've never seen anyone write out a check to pay for a dinner.
 
2014-01-06 12:53:29 AM  
Dust causes impotence.
 
2014-01-06 12:55:06 AM  

SirEattonHogg: There are restaurants that accept checks?

I guess there would be. I suppose in small towns and they accept local bank checks but I've never seen anyone write out a check to pay for a dinner.


I usually pay cash, but I'll pay with a check if I go out someplace upscale and expensive like Carrabba's.
 
2014-01-06 12:55:06 AM  
A) A restaurant that accepts checks?

B)  Seems kind of odd to tell some random customer her life story.
 
2014-01-06 12:55:10 AM  

ultraholland: "I couldn't believe it. I tried to thank them, and they said, 'thank God.'"

Good on them, but I'd prefer doing a good deed in the name of Satan. Nobody ever thanks him and I think that's why he's always in such a bad mood.


I want to take a trip to a hot country (Cuba will do nicely) so I can worship Satan for a week. Cheque please?  $1000 should cover it.
 
2014-01-06 12:55:12 AM  
 I guess the article doesn't really say they paid their tab with a check.
 
2014-01-06 12:56:32 AM  
Zombies give fellow zombie free ticket to brain farm.
 
2014-01-06 12:57:21 AM  
I don't normally complain about headlines (this is, in fact, the first time ever) but this is Buzzfeed-quality garbage.  Whoever wrote it is bad and should feel bad, and same goes for whoever let this abomination go green.
 
2014-01-06 01:00:11 AM  
they would probably only have given her a 10% tip if she wasnt a christian like them.
 
2014-01-06 01:01:11 AM  

Jamesac68: I don't normally complain about headlines (this is, in fact, the first time ever) but this is Buzzfeed-quality garbage.  Whoever wrote it is bad and should feel bad, and same goes for whoever let this abomination go green.


"A thousand people have already clicked this headline. What are you waiting for?"
 
2014-01-06 01:02:17 AM  
It's better to keep these things on the downlow

*cough* taxman *taxman*
 
2014-01-06 01:02:54 AM  
Could be I've just become overly skeptical but this story smells funny.

At any rate, it's nice that the waitress caught a break.
 
2014-01-06 01:03:22 AM  
Touching but....

"She had just finished her first semester at Trinity Bible College in North Dakota, where she's studying youth ministry and psychology."

Fail.
 
2014-01-06 01:04:35 AM  
img1.fark.net IRS says "God Bless" to cheery Lincoln waitress
 
2014-01-06 01:05:56 AM  
Uh oh. Something nice happened to a Christian. This could get snarky.
 
2014-01-06 01:06:30 AM  
My window got a pop up asking me to answer a question before I can read the rest of the article. The question: what I would do if today was my last day on earth?

Oh...all the snarky answers I could post to this....
 
2014-01-06 01:10:57 AM  

JosephFinn: A) A restaurant that accepts checks?

B)  Seems kind of odd to tell some random customer her life story.


Some people are more open about that sort of thing. My brother's GF is the same way. I guess it's just how they work.
 
2014-01-06 01:12:19 AM  

JosephFinn: A) A restaurant that accepts checks?


It sounds like they gave her a couple of cheques for tuition and stuff, but paid for the meal/tip normally.
 
2014-01-06 01:13:11 AM  

Danger Avoid Death: Uh oh. Something nice happened to a Christian. This could get snarky.


I know - Imagine if she was a jew or a muslim?! She's would have gotten double!
 
2014-01-06 01:14:50 AM  

JosephFinn: B)  Seems kind of odd to tell some random customer her life story.


As a diner denizen for most of my life, I wish I had a dollar for every time I've sat in frustration, trying to read, but instead being forced to listen to the boring and poorly told life story of some bone-headed server who thinks she's the reason you stopped in for a cup of coffee.
 
2014-01-06 01:21:22 AM  
I hope she does well, but pursuing majors in ministry and psych will mean she could make more money as a waitress.
 
2014-01-06 01:21:34 AM  
Faaaaaaaaaaake
 
2014-01-06 01:25:15 AM  
I have been tipped $500 a few times, given 1st class roundtrip airfare once, and hot sex on numerous occasions (once it was with 3 blondes visiting from MN).  There are some mighty generous people out there.  AMDG, men for others.
 
2014-01-06 01:26:44 AM  

EdNortonsTwin: It's better to keep these things on the downlow

*cough* taxman *taxman*


I don't think there's any tax problem here.

http://www.irs.gov/Businesses/Small-Businesses-&-Self-Employed/Frequ en tly-Asked-Questions-on-Gift-Taxes
Who pays the gift tax?
"The donor is generally responsible for paying the gift tax."

How many annual exclusions are available?
"$14,000 on or after January 1, 2013"
 
2014-01-06 01:26:47 AM  

muddythinker: I hope she does well, but pursuing majors in ministry and psych will mean she could make more money as a waitress.


You might be surprised how much money there is in starting a church.  She may have the *perfect* double-major.
 
2014-01-06 01:29:01 AM  
A Nigerian Prince gave me the same windfall.
 
2014-01-06 01:41:43 AM  
I left someone a tip for $5 at that grease pit once. Why don't they tell my story? Mine has more sex and twice the ninjas.
 
2014-01-06 01:46:24 AM  
You know what I call customers who ask me a million questions about my life? A pain in my farking ass. But then again I'm a rather antisocial type who doesn't enjoy meeting new people. Why I never get tipped is beyond me, lmfao.
 
2014-01-06 01:53:30 AM  
That's a cute story, but does her sister work there too? Why is she being quoted in the telling of the story?

And why is that couple claiming to be god?
 
2014-01-06 01:57:48 AM  
I no longer believe any of these ZOMG amazing tip/ racist nontip stories.
 
2014-01-06 02:00:21 AM  

The My Little Pony Killer: That's a cute story, but does her sister work there too? Why is she being quoted in the telling of the story?


Maybe the sister is the one who went to the "bible college" with the idea and got the press onto it.

It seems unlikely one of these guys was looking to do a random deed of charity at a random restaurant and just happened to get a waitress who was a student with financial difficulties at his podunk out-of-state alma mater.
 
2014-01-06 02:04:11 AM  
Sorry for being cynical, but the story just seems a little too neat and perfect. It may just be poor writing on the part of the author, but it's hard to believe conversations like that would happen.

Would you really tell complete strangers about abuse in foster homes as a child? If they ask you why you're so happy, why not just say "oh, I have a wonderful family!"
 
2014-01-06 02:06:10 AM  
This smells like doody.
 
2014-01-06 02:15:04 AM  
Who the fark is this "God" character, anyway?
 
2014-01-06 02:16:03 AM  

ultraholland: "I couldn't believe it. I tried to thank them, and they said, 'thank God.'"

Good on them, but I'd prefer doing a good deed in the name of Satan. Nobody ever thanks him and I think that's why he's always in such a bad mood.


Hey don't look now
But there goes god
In his sexy pants
And his sausage dog
And he can't stand
Beelzebub
'cos he looks so good in black, in black
 
2014-01-06 02:23:23 AM  

SirEattonHogg: There are restaurants that accept checks?

I guess there would be. I suppose in small towns and they accept local bank checks but I've never seen anyone write out a check to pay for a dinner.


There's a mom and pop breakfast place here in Deland (not a small town, btw) - they do a TON of business but they don't take credit cards. It's cash or check only.
 
2014-01-06 02:29:39 AM  
Wow another person trying to buy their way into heaven. Film at 11.
 
2014-01-06 02:41:56 AM  

Jamesac68: I don't normally complain about headlines (this is, in fact, the first time ever) but this is Buzzfeed-quality garbage.  Whoever wrote it is bad and should feel bad, and same goes for whoever let this abomination go green.


At least we don't have to read it day in day out.
Seriously, how many times does Drew think we need to see that Neil deGrasse Tyson trolled gravity on twitter?
 
2014-01-06 02:50:05 AM  

sjcousins: Jamesac68: I don't normally complain about headlines (this is, in fact, the first time ever) but this is Buzzfeed-quality garbage.  Whoever wrote it is bad and should feel bad, and same goes for whoever let this abomination go green.

At least we don't have to read it day in day out.
Seriously, how many times does Drew think we need to see that Neil deGrasse Tyson trolled gravity on twitter?


There's gravity on Twitter??

/bored
 
2014-01-06 02:51:26 AM  

FDR Jones: Who the fark is this "God" character, anyway?


4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-01-06 02:53:26 AM  

ArcadianRefugee: sjcousins: Jamesac68: I don't normally complain about headlines (this is, in fact, the first time ever) but this is Buzzfeed-quality garbage.  Whoever wrote it is bad and should feel bad, and same goes for whoever let this abomination go green.

At least we don't have to read it day in day out.
Seriously, how many times does Drew think we need to see that Neil deGrasse Tyson trolled gravity on twitter?

There's gravity on Twitter??

/bored


There might be. I never clicked the link.
 
2014-01-06 03:00:29 AM  
proof that god exists?
even if only in the hearts of the charitable, it is tangible proof of his existence because if the real affect on people's lives.
 
2014-01-06 03:01:53 AM  
Have fun with that degree from Trinity Bible College. My family tried to get me to go to one of these training camps for bullshiat artists and I knew it was a bad scene even before I had all the coolaid out of my system.

Different strokes I guess.
 
2014-01-06 03:16:14 AM  
Is this the story in which god crashed the family car giving the mother an unrecoverable brain injury and making it so the father is unfit to be a father and then moving the children into homes where they were abused only to be moved to another home that they would again be abused and then ultimately having the girl work as a waitress only to be given a small amount of money and told to thank the deity that caused all this to happen in the first place?
 
2014-01-06 03:21:34 AM  

C18H27NO3: Is this the story in which god crashed the family car giving the mother an unrecoverable brain injury and making it so the father is unfit to be a father and then moving the children into homes where they were abused only to be moved to another home that they would again be abused and then ultimately having the girl work as a waitress only to be given a small amount of money and told to thank the deity that caused all this to happen in the first place?


No. That one's over in the Sports tab.
 
2014-01-06 03:23:52 AM  

C18H27NO3: Is this the story in which god crashed the family car giving the mother an unrecoverable brain injury and making it so the father is unfit to be a father and then moving the children into homes where they were abused only to be moved to another home that they would again be abused and then ultimately having the girl work as a waitress only to be given a small amount of money and told to thank the deity that caused all this to happen in the first place?


i think the answer you are looking for is:
god doesn't cause these things to happen, or "allow" them to happen.
god might give people the strength to overcome these things, or motivate people in some way to help others and embrace them like family. if course it could just be kindness, but that is what god is. god isn't some dude that looks like charleton heston, god is kindness, charity, love....
 
2014-01-06 03:30:47 AM  
This is why I tell people sob stories while showing an optimistic spirit, you never know who might fall for your stories and give you money.
 
2014-01-06 03:31:22 AM  

Popular Opinion: C18H27NO3: Is this the story in which god crashed the family car giving the mother an unrecoverable brain injury and making it so the father is unfit to be a father and then moving the children into homes where they were abused only to be moved to another home that they would again be abused and then ultimately having the girl work as a waitress only to be given a small amount of money and told to thank the deity that caused all this to happen in the first place?

i think the answer you are looking for is:
god doesn't cause these things to happen, or "allow" them to happen.
god might give people the strength to overcome these things, or motivate people in some way to help others and embrace them like family. if course it could just be kindness, but that is what god is. god isn't some dude that looks like charleton heston, god is kindness, charity, love....


You're obviously a lunatic if you actually believe any of that bullshiat. I mean seriously, get help. If you're simply trolling then, "meh", no harm done.
 
2014-01-06 03:35:07 AM  
Oh damn you, I didn't realize until after I hit Enter but by then it was too late.
 
2014-01-06 03:37:48 AM  

GreenSun: This is why I tell people sob stories while showing an optimistic spirit, you never know who might fall for your stories and give you money.


Well, if you don't show them an optimistic spirit, they just call you whiny and an attention whore.
 
2014-01-06 03:45:26 AM  

theslowblade: Have fun with that degree from Trinity Bible College.


The Trinity Colleges, like the name implies, are actually three campuses in one. The Trinity Bible College, the Trinity Barber College, and the Trinity Clown College.

meanspirited.net
 
2014-01-06 03:46:52 AM  

C18H27NO3: Popular Opinion: C18H27NO3: Is this the story in which god crashed the family car giving the mother an unrecoverable brain injury and making it so the father is unfit to be a father and then moving the children into homes where they were abused only to be moved to another home that they would again be abused and then ultimately having the girl work as a waitress only to be given a small amount of money and told to thank the deity that caused all this to happen in the first place?

i think the answer you are looking for is:
god doesn't cause these things to happen, or "allow" them to happen.
god might give people the strength to overcome these things, or motivate people in some way to help others and embrace them like family. if course it could just be kindness, but that is what god is. god isn't some dude that looks like charleton heston, god is kindness, charity, love....

You're obviously a lunatic if you actually believe any of that bullshiat. I mean seriously, get help. If you're simply trolling then, "meh", no harm done.


John 1.4
 7 Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God.
 8 He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.


people get different things out of the new testament.
i believe the message is simply to love each other and treat others as you would have them treat you.

i don't think that is crazy.
crazy to expect selfish, self centered people to comprehend? absolutely.
 
2014-01-06 03:51:13 AM  
I bring not peace, but a Sword ... for champagne service.
 
2014-01-06 03:52:06 AM  
Good on her.
 
2014-01-06 03:54:13 AM  
Another reference to god being in our hearts.

12 No one has ever seen God. Yet, if we love one another, God remains in us, and his love is brought to perfection in us.
 
2014-01-06 03:55:02 AM  

Popular Opinion: people get different things out of the new testament.
i believe the message is simply to love each other and treat others as you would have them treat you.


What does that have to do with anything?

Please, justify human suffering to me.
 
2014-01-06 03:55:22 AM  

TheOtherMisterP: Sorry for being cynical, but the story just seems a little too neat and perfect. It may just be poor writing on the part of the author, but it's hard to believe conversations like that would happen.


The tip: the reporter has not, apparently, even tried contacting Trinity for comment on whether they ever got such a check - even if only to say they can't comment on an individual student's tuition payment.

Classic too-good-to-check story. The editor deserves an ass kicking for not catching this.
 
2014-01-06 04:03:02 AM  
Wow. I haven't seen an honest-to-goodness Bible thumper since my chatroom days.
 
2014-01-06 04:03:54 AM  

C18H27NO3: Popular Opinion: people get different things out of the new testament.
i believe the message is simply to love each other and treat others as you would have them treat you.

What does that have to do with anything?

Please, justify human suffering to me.


i think you misinterpret god, or me, or both.

sh*t happens. there is no reason for it. people crash, fall down stairs, do bad things...
this is not part of some plan.
 
2014-01-06 04:10:58 AM  
Danger Avoid Death:

The Trinity Colleges, like the name implies, are actually three campuses in one. The Trinity Bible College, the Trinity Barber College, and the Trinity Clown College.

[meanspirited.net image 534x450]

Great, I wasn't afraid of clowns before. Now I won't be able to sleep at night, there goes doing that sleep study
 
2014-01-06 04:14:47 AM  

Peki: Wow. I haven't seen an honest-to-goodness Bible thumper since my chatroom days.


well, i did have to google the verses ;o)
 
2014-01-06 04:15:41 AM  

Popular Opinion: C18H27NO3: Popular Opinion: people get different things out of the new testament.
i believe the message is simply to love each other and treat others as you would have them treat you.

What does that have to do with anything?

Please, justify human suffering to me.

i think you misinterpret god, or me, or both.

sh*t happens. there is no reason for it. people crash, fall down stairs, do bad things...
this is not part of some plan.


Oh, it's that interpreting thing again. How convenient. This whole religion thing has played out well past its prime.
It didn't take me 9 years of catholic school (thanks mom and dad) to realize what a total crock of shiat it is. The only thing I gained from it was a much better general education that I wouldn't have had from public schooling. That's it.
To be honest I guess it helped me realize the perpetual scam going around but I'm sure I would have figured that much out no matter my circumstances.
One thing rings true even now; you can take people out of the stone age but you can't take the stone age out of the people.
 
2014-01-06 04:19:31 AM  
 20 If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen?
 21 And this commandment have we from him, That he who loveth God love his brother also.
 
2014-01-06 04:21:20 AM  

C18H27NO3: Popular Opinion: C18H27NO3: Popular Opinion: people get different things out of the new testament.
i believe the message is simply to love each other and treat others as you would have them treat you.

What does that have to do with anything?

Please, justify human suffering to me.

i think you misinterpret god, or me, or both.

sh*t happens. there is no reason for it. people crash, fall down stairs, do bad things...
this is not part of some plan.

Oh, it's that interpreting thing again. How convenient. This whole religion thing has played out well past its prime.
It didn't take me 9 years of catholic school (thanks mom and dad) to realize what a total crock of shiat it is. The only thing I gained from it was a much better general education that I wouldn't have had from public schooling. That's it.
To be honest I guess it helped me realize the perpetual scam going around but I'm sure I would have figured that much out no matter my circumstances.
One thing rings true even now; you can take people out of the stone age but you can't take the stone age out of the people.


what scam is this?
sounds like you got nothing but your knickers in a twist.
 
2014-01-06 04:38:49 AM  

Popular Opinion: C18H27NO3: Popular Opinion: C18H27NO3: Popular Opinion: people get different things out of the new testament.
i believe the message is simply to love each other and treat others as you would have them treat you.

What does that have to do with anything?

Please, justify human suffering to me.

i think you misinterpret god, or me, or both.

sh*t happens. there is no reason for it. people crash, fall down stairs, do bad things...
this is not part of some plan.

Oh, it's that interpreting thing again. How convenient. This whole religion thing has played out well past its prime.
It didn't take me 9 years of catholic school (thanks mom and dad) to realize what a total crock of shiat it is. The only thing I gained from it was a much better general education that I wouldn't have had from public schooling. That's it.
To be honest I guess it helped me realize the perpetual scam going around but I'm sure I would have figured that much out no matter my circumstances.
One thing rings true even now; you can take people out of the stone age but you can't take the stone age out of the people.

what scam is this?
sounds like you got nothing but your knickers in a twist.


Try to deflect. Typical. You know full well what I said.
If you actually do need help then I'm saying all religion is a scam. It's bullshiat propagated throughout generations to instill control of the masses and money to the maintainers. That's all it is, all it was, and all it ever will be until people grow the fark up and realize they've been had all this time.
You people are so sad.Yes, You People.
I find it rather easy to live a fulfilling life in which I'm also kind to other people without some rag telling me to do so.
I also think if I were on the level of your (oh yes, I'm going to say it) god then I think I would most likely NOT have suffering every single second of the day. Because that's what we have, people and animals suffering every single second of the day.
When I say that I don't think you actually appreciate what I mean when I say suffering. You can't even get past your fairy tales much less the horrible things that people endure. Go fark yourself.
 
2014-01-06 04:42:57 AM  
Ah, and there's the guy who says "all religion is BS."

I swear to god it's 1999 again.
 
2014-01-06 04:54:20 AM  

Peki: Ah, and there's the guy who says "all religion is BS."

I swear to god it's 1999 again.


Religion in the sense that there is some higher omniscient, omnipotent being controlling everything then yes; bullshiat.
If we're simply talking a state of mind without direction from that said being (which you seem to be eluding to) then ok.
/Either way I couldn't care less what you post.
 
2014-01-06 04:58:47 AM  

C18H27NO3: Peki: Ah, and there's the guy who says "all religion is BS."

I swear to god it's 1999 again.

Religion in the sense that there is some higher omniscient, omnipotent being controlling everything then yes; bullshiat.
If we're simply talking a state of mind without direction from that said being (which you seem to be eluding to) then ok.
/Either way I couldn't care less what you post.


And you think we are sad. You're pathetic. And miserable.
 
2014-01-06 05:02:33 AM  

Danger Avoid Death: C18H27NO3: Peki: Ah, and there's the guy who says "all religion is BS."

I swear to god it's 1999 again.

Religion in the sense that there is some higher omniscient, omnipotent being controlling everything then yes; bullshiat.
If we're simply talking a state of mind without direction from that said being (which you seem to be eluding to) then ok.
/Either way I couldn't care less what you post.

And you think we are sad. You're pathetic. And miserable.


/hugs and kisses
 
2014-01-06 05:09:46 AM  
bible college eh? nothing says gods got a plan like putting you through childhood hell, death of millions and billions, and the suffering of countless human beings.

thanks god
 
2014-01-06 05:14:12 AM  
I knew, I just knew when the article started off at a Cracker Barrel in the mid-west, it would end with God.

Does any ministry really want to be that predictable?
 
2014-01-06 05:18:27 AM  

Danger Avoid Death: C18H27NO3: Peki: Ah, and there's the guy who says "all religion is BS."

I swear to god it's 1999 again.

Religion in the sense that there is some higher omniscient, omnipotent being controlling everything then yes; bullshiat.
If we're simply talking a state of mind without direction from that said being (which you seem to be eluding to) then ok.
/Either way I couldn't care less what you post.

And you think we are sad. You're pathetic. And miserable.


I'm pathetic and miserable because why? All I did was say religion is a farce.
It might come off as a thorn in your side but I am in fact neither pathetic nor miserable.
If calling me that is part of being in your religion then I guess I'm going to have to plead ignorant of what you people decide is ok and not ok. After all, didn't god make me like he made other people that are against what you *cough* believe.
I would expect that he made everybody or am I wrong?
Perhaps there is someone even stronger than he, or equally strong but neither would make sense. If god were the big daddy of all things he wouldn't even have let that happen.
If you were the absolute supreme being in the history of all things real and unreal; you were the creator. You wouldn't even have to make such a thing as suffering.
But you did.
For that you can go fark yourself.
Obviously I don't mean you, I mean your imaginary friend.
 
2014-01-06 05:23:14 AM  

Omahawg: I left someone a tip for $5 at that grease pit once. Why don't they tell my story? Mine has more sex and twice the ninjas.


A bunch of strangers gave me enough money for five years of college, but I wasn't working as a waiter at the time.
 
2014-01-06 05:43:52 AM  

C18H27NO3: Danger Avoid Death: C18H27NO3: Peki: Ah, and there's the guy who says "all religion is BS."

I swear to god it's 1999 again.

Religion in the sense that there is some higher omniscient, omnipotent being controlling everything then yes; bullshiat.
If we're simply talking a state of mind without direction from that said being (which you seem to be eluding to) then ok.
/Either way I couldn't care less what you post.

And you think we are sad. You're pathetic. And miserable.

I'm pathetic and miserable because why? All I did was say religion is a farce.
It might come off as a thorn in your side but I am in fact neither pathetic nor miserable.
If calling me that is part of being in your religion then I guess I'm going to have to plead ignorant of what you people decide is ok and not ok. After all, didn't god make me like he made other people that are against what you *cough* believe.
I would expect that he made everybody or am I wrong?
Perhaps there is someone even stronger than he, or equally strong but neither would make sense. If god were the big daddy of all things he wouldn't even have let that happen.
If you were the absolute supreme being in the history of all things real and unreal; you were the creator. You wouldn't even have to make such a thing as suffering.
But you did.
For that you can go fark yourself.
Obviously I don't mean you, I mean your imaginary friend.


You are equating all religion with Christianity, my friend. I think you need to read some.

/not all religions have a creator. Not all religions have a god. All religions are meant to tie people together in community.
 
2014-01-06 06:07:59 AM  
I am honestly curious if this story would've played out the same way if the waitress wasn't cute.
 
2014-01-06 06:34:57 AM  
So, after she gets her degree from Bibble College, she can at Cracker Barrel. Oh...wait....
 
2014-01-06 06:40:11 AM  
it does read like glurge. I'm open to it turning out to be true, but I'm going with glurge.
 
2014-01-06 06:41:34 AM  
Her mother never fully recovered from her brain injury, and her father wasn't fit to be a father.
They endured abuse there for years, said Abigail's older sister, Sydnie Murphy. That foster father is still in prison.
"All the horror stories you hear about foster care," Sydnie said, "we lived through it."


/Here's some money. We cool?
//God is AMAZING
 
2014-01-06 06:51:52 AM  
 
2014-01-06 06:53:13 AM  
digitalrain:

There's a mom and pop breakfast place here in Deland (not a small town, btw) - they do a TON of business but they don't take credit cards. It's cash or check only.

Deland.. Florida? The place where U.S. 17  is the main drag and the McDonalds entrance looks like a drunk designed the plans?  Not a small town?  I love to laugh in the morning.

/Never been there
// Love that museum don't think it's still there though.
///Actually it's a beautiful little city.
 
2014-01-06 07:02:07 AM  
What a waste of a life - waiting tables to save enough money to buy a worthless education in Make Believe.
 
2014-01-06 07:11:29 AM  
Just when I thought I was a cynic, Fark reminds me that some people are much worse.
 
2014-01-06 07:14:20 AM  
Oh it's all true, I'm sure. Every last word.
 
2014-01-06 07:18:37 AM  
The fact that she goes into another room and reappears a few minutes later with Cracker Barrel's tasty hasbrown casserole makes her a saint in my book!
 
2014-01-06 07:41:08 AM  
What the couple tips her at the end of the meal is a bit dusty

So they gave her a set of ancient books?

/someone's going to have to clean up that mess
 
2014-01-06 07:44:31 AM  

Peki: You are equating all religion with Christianity, my friend. I think you need to read some.

/not all religions have a creator. Not all religions have a god. All religions are meant to tie people together in community.


I can appreciate what you are getting at except the 'tie the whole people together thing'.
I thought we did that just because it was the right farking thing to do. We need some fairy tale to tell us that?
Honest to goodness question: Do people really need religion to tell them how to behave to each other? Are some people that shallow?
 
2014-01-06 07:48:58 AM  
Good story, even if I do think it's fake.
 
2014-01-06 07:56:31 AM  
I'm sensing rich person guilt. They were out to find someone to help out.

/that or fake.
 
2014-01-06 08:13:34 AM  

Crewmannumber6: Good story, even if I do think it's fake.


If you need a point of reference to understand what a real fake story looks like, scroll back up the thread to this guy:

CoonAce: I have been tipped $500 a few times, given 1st class roundtrip airfare once, and hot sex on numerous occasions (once it was with 3 blondes visiting from MN).  There are some mighty generous people out there.  AMDG, men for others.

 
2014-01-06 08:13:41 AM  
scalpod:
Hey don't look now
But there goes god
In his sexy pants
And his sausage dog
And he can't stand
Beelzebub
'cos he looks so good in black, in black


NICE!

A tip of the hat from the temple of low men, to you.

/I hope that's the right album
 
2014-01-06 08:13:48 AM  

Fuggin Bizzy: When the headline says "it gets dusty," I say "Well, fark that then," and I go read something else.


Does somebody need a hug?
 
2014-01-06 08:20:30 AM  

StopLurkListen: EdNortonsTwin: It's better to keep these things on the downlow

*cough* taxman *taxman*

I don't think there's any tax problem here.

http://www.irs.gov/Businesses/Small-Businesses-&-Self-Employed/Frequ en tly-Asked-Questions-on-Gift-Taxes
Who pays the gift tax?
"The donor is generally responsible for paying the gift tax."

How many annual exclusions are available?
"$14,000 on or after January 1, 2013"


Yeah, but tips aren't generally considered gifts, but rather income... Given how they split up the checks separately from the official tip, maybe a case could be made for it being a gift instead, but I wouldn't put it past the IRS to dispute that...

C18H27NO3: Peki: /not all religions have a creator. Not all religions have a god. All religions are meant to tie people together in community.

I can appreciate what you are getting at except the 'tie the whole people together thing'.


images3.wikia.nocookie.net

That religion really tied the whole people together, didn't it?
farkin' A.
And, this guy peed on it.
 
2014-01-06 08:35:09 AM  

Omahawg: I left someone a tip for $5 at that grease pit once. Why don't they tell my story? Mine has more sex and twice the ninjas.


How can you know how many ninjas there are in any given story?
 
2014-01-06 08:43:55 AM  

fugeeface: Good on her.


Agreed. I know it's Fark and all, but the kid caught a nice break. Good for the people who did it, too.
 
2014-01-06 08:57:10 AM  

Spanky McStupid: Fuggin Bizzy: When the headline says "it gets dusty," I say "Well, fark that then," and I go read something else.

Does somebody need a hug?


Yes. C18H27NO3 seems pretty upset.
 
2014-01-06 09:14:07 AM  

Popular Opinion: 20 If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen?
 21 And this commandment have we from him, That he who loveth God love his brother also.


So... God IS OK with the gays?
 
2014-01-06 09:15:29 AM  
No need to have social programs that help these people.

The private sector is handling it.
 
2014-01-06 09:21:54 AM  
But was she happy and gay?
 
2014-01-06 09:37:25 AM  

Peki: ultraholland: "I couldn't believe it. I tried to thank them, and they said, 'thank God.'"

Good on them, but I'd prefer doing a good deed in the name of Satan. Nobody ever thanks him and I think that's why he's always in such a bad mood.

Seems like a good place to put this. - The Oklahoma Atheist


Now that is awesome!
 
2014-01-06 09:46:49 AM  

ultraholland: "I couldn't believe it. I tried to thank them, and they said, 'thank God.'"

Good on them, but I'd prefer doing a good deed in the name of Satan. Nobody ever thanks him and I think that's why he's always in such a bad mood.


First thing that I thought of was "what a great world in which social injustice and economic want are remedied by unlikely happenstance and random charity".
 
2014-01-06 10:03:48 AM  

muddythinker: I hope she does well, but pursuing majors in ministry and psych will mean she could make more money as a waitress.


Fark handle is appropriate.

/ministry-work people have a different definition of "doing well."
 
2014-01-06 10:05:02 AM  
And this waitress did not play the fake racism or compulsive lesbian liar card.

See, there are some good white folk in the world.
 
2014-01-06 10:05:51 AM  
She had just finished her first semester at Trinity Bible College in North Dakota, where she's studying youth ministry and psychology.

I think I found the problem with her being broke...
 
2014-01-06 10:10:55 AM  
Hmm, so I was going to comment on how you shouldn't go to the media with stories like this, because then you'll have to report that tip on your taxes.  But, the guy spread it across a few checks.  Can she count the $100 as a tip, and the $5000 and $1000 as some kind of gift?
 
2014-01-06 10:14:14 AM  
Sweet story, but did it make me cry? No
 
2014-01-06 10:17:10 AM  

C18H27NO3: And you think we are sad. You're pathetic. And miserable.


Dude, every time you try to debate religion (particularly Christianity) with a believer and you make a point about how it is ENTIRELY made up bullshiat, that is the response you will get almost every farking time. Don't sweat it.
 
2014-01-06 10:23:28 AM  
I think that I am going to throw up. Well, actually I am going to throw up.

ataglanztv.com
 
2014-01-06 10:32:07 AM  
Stories like this sure do bring out the worst in some people around here. Or maybe that's their best. Which is sad.
 
2014-01-06 10:43:00 AM  

C18H27NO3: Peki: You are equating all religion with Christianity, my friend. I think you need to read some.

/not all religions have a creator. Not all religions have a god. All religions are meant to tie people together in community.

I can appreciate what you are getting at except the 'tie the whole people together thing'.
I thought we did that just because it was the right farking thing to do. We need some fairy tale to tell us that?
Honest to goodness question: Do people really need religion to tell them how to behave to each other? Are some people that shallow?


Religion makes a lot of people happy. I'm sorry you're not.

Don't go acting like the right thing is always so obvious, though. Sometimes one needs to look to outside wisdom to determine what's right, and one source of wisdom can be religion.
 
2014-01-06 10:46:28 AM  

NobleHam: Don't go acting like the right thing is always so obvious, though. Sometimes one needs to look to outside wisdom to determine what's right, and one source of wisdom can be religio


ha ha. Yup...every time.
 
2014-01-06 11:11:45 AM  
*sigh*

Public disclaimer time: the over-generalizing anti-religious people do not represent all atheists.  Many of us are aware of awesome Christians who do not attend/rarely go to church nor buy into the BS spewed by many a crooked evangelist.  These guys have seen for themselves people nodding their heads in agreement at a Christmas mass within the walls of a church, then fighting each other to be the first out of the parking lot while flipping the bird to the fellow parishioners.  I've met many who believe in the Ten Commandments, who believe Jesus is god, and who also believe human kind has tainted the bible & many of the teachings are incorrect or flawed.  I call these folks "enlightened" because they believe with their eyes & ears open.  I don't see anything harmful or wrong with that whatsoever, even though it is very different than what I believe (not having faith & all)

TL;DR version: not all atheists over-generalize Christians.  Some of us grasp the notion of individuality.  Proceed with caution.
 
2014-01-06 11:27:02 AM  
As someone who went through a similar childhood, I can say that it can lead to believing all sorts of irrational things. I, for one, believed that I was literally unworthy of being complemented until my late 20s. I turned compliment deflection into an art form. So, this girl's belief that a college accredited by a bogus accreditation group will give her a degree worth the paper it's printed on is not exactly a stretch.
 
2014-01-06 11:44:13 AM  

C18H27NO3: Popular Opinion: C18H27NO3: Popular Opinion: C18H27NO3: Popular Opinion: people get different things out of the new testament.
i believe the message is simply to love each other and treat others as you would have them treat you.

What does that have to do with anything?

Please, justify human suffering to me.

i think you misinterpret god, or me, or both.

sh*t happens. there is no reason for it. people crash, fall down stairs, do bad things...
this is not part of some plan.

Oh, it's that interpreting thing again. How convenient. This whole religion thing has played out well past its prime.
It didn't take me 9 years of catholic school (thanks mom and dad) to realize what a total crock of shiat it is. The only thing I gained from it was a much better general education that I wouldn't have had from public schooling. That's it.
To be honest I guess it helped me realize the perpetual scam going around but I'm sure I would have figured that much out no matter my circumstances.
One thing rings true even now; you can take people out of the stone age but you can't take the stone age out of the people.

what scam is this?
sounds like you got nothing but your knickers in a twist.

Try to deflect. Typical. You know full well what I said.
If you actually do need help then I'm saying all religion is a scam. It's bullshiat propagated throughout generations to instill control of the masses and money to the maintainers. That's all it is, all it was, and all it ever will be until people grow the fark up and realize they've been had all this time.
You people are so sad.Yes, You People.
I find it rather easy to live a fulfilling life in which I'm also kind to other people without some rag telling me to do so.
I also think if I were on the level of your (oh yes, I'm going to say it) god then I think I would most likely NOT have suffering every single second of the day. Because that's what we have, people and animals suffering every single second of the day.
When I say that I don't thi ...


And this logic is why atheists want to start churches.

/They also tend to be petty and bitter. See comments above
 
2014-01-06 11:49:01 AM  

Lee451: /They also tend to be petty and bitter. See comments above


Every time.
 
2014-01-06 11:53:39 AM  
I'm going to go with Faaaaake too, this line stood out

When the men were finished eating, one told her he had graduated from Trinity.

Reads like an advertisement for Trinity to show how "jesus-y" they are
 
2014-01-06 12:49:52 PM  

santadog: Popular Opinion: 20 If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen?
 21 And this commandment have we from him, That he who loveth God love his brother also.

So... God IS OK with the gays?


And incest apparently.
 
2014-01-06 01:28:00 PM  
Yea, god has done so much for her and her siblings so far.

Did he just wake up, and try to make her life better after all these years?
 
2014-01-06 01:45:37 PM  

kwame: Crewmannumber6: Good story, even if I do think it's fake.

If you need a point of reference to understand what a real fake story looks like, scroll back up the thread to this guy:

CoonAce: I have been tipped $500 a few times, given 1st class roundtrip airfare once, and hot sex on numerous occasions (once it was with 3 blondes visiting from MN).  There are some mighty generous people out there.  AMDG, men for others.


Believe what you will.  Scandalous shiat goes down in restaurants and bars, some rich folks with the black AmEx are loose with overtipping, and countless female tourists hit New Orleans looking for a buck-wild weekend.  It's all true.  For me it was polish, skill, charm, & hustle ... and lucky timing in the instance of airfare home for Mardi Gras.  (A rich older couple who were impressed with my service noticed my LSU necktie that night, and asked if I was homesick.  I explained that my dad's wedding was the following night in New Orleans & cashflow was too tight to make the trip while due to putting my wife through U-M law school, and on top of that it was going to be my first Mardi Gras I'd ever missed.  The husband put me on the first flight out the next morning, and the wife wrote a check out to cash for $500 pocket money.)  Pay it forward y'all, and have a good one.
 
2014-01-06 03:25:51 PM  

Popular Opinion: proof that god exists?
even if only in the hearts of the charitable, it is tangible proof of his existence because if the real affect on people's lives.


And proof that god is an asshole, for letting her and her siblings suffer as they did for years.
 
2014-01-06 04:02:36 PM  

C18H27NO3: Peki: You are equating all religion with Christianity, my friend. I think you need to read some.

/not all religions have a creator. Not all religions have a god. All religions are meant to tie people together in community.

I can appreciate what you are getting at except the 'tie the whole people together thing'.
I thought we did that just because it was the right farking thing to do. We need some fairy tale to tell us that?
Honest to goodness question: Do people really need religion to tell them how to behave to each other? Are some people that shallow?


Sometimes. Look at Wall Street. Would be nice if those guys had a little bit of religion, don't you think? It helps you remember the big picture, instead of always letting your own self-interest guide you.

I'm an atheist who doesn't think you need religion to be a good person, but becoming a UU is forcing me to address parts of my personality that aren't always nice or positive-minded. Plus, you can justify almost any action or belief to yourself; much harder when you have a group of folks looking at you going, "That's not such a good idea." You need that outside voice to counteract the BS you're telling yourself.
 
2014-01-06 04:27:24 PM  

Peki: C18H27NO3: Honest to goodness question: Do people really need religion to tell them how to behave to each other? Are some people that shallow?

Sometimes. Look at Wall Street. Would be nice if those guys had a little bit of religion, don't you think? It helps you remember the big picture, instead of always letting your own self-interest guide you.


Great theory, but in reality, in general, the people lacking personal ethics and with low empathy and little conscience will just use the religion as a tool to justify their assholish ways rather than try to change them... Basically, the only people religion can make into "good" people were already mostly good to begin with... They may have made some mistakes along the way, but the important thing is that they already regret them because they already have personal ethics and feel bad about hurting others... The religion may give them an excuse or motivation to change for the better, and that's cool, but ultimately it only works because they're decent people with ethics and a conscience to start with... The sociopaths on Wall Street don't have any of that... Give them religion, and they'll just find a way to profit more off of it, and continue not caring about the harm they're doing... If they cared what others thought of them, they'd already be vulnerable to just normal societal pressure to act ethically without the need for a much smaller church group to do it...

/Disclaimer: I'm not calling everyone on Wall Street a sociopath... Necessarily...
 
2014-01-06 06:10:42 PM  

Peki: Ah, and there's the guy who says "all religion is BS."

I swear to god it's 1999 again.


Can you prove that it's not bullshiat? Can you prove that people absolutely need to have a book of fairy tales in order to tell them how to live their lives?

Are you saying that churches somehow don't exist in order to control the masses?

/there's a very good reason I farkied you as 'potato' when you started making your rounds
 
2014-01-06 07:47:05 PM  
Oh this is such farking bullshiat, how does this trite qualify as "news"? fark you. What is the moral of the story here? Tell your customers a sob story and they'll give you 6 grand? fark this
 
2014-01-06 09:07:12 PM  

JosephFinn: A) A restaurant that accepts checks?

B)  Seems kind of odd to tell some random customer her life story.


Didn't read the article did you.

A) $5,000 dollar check for tuition written to the school.
    $1,000 dollar check written to her.
    Then on top of all of that left a hundred dollar tip, not a check that she split with another server.

B)The two Patrons kept asking her questions that she would answer.
 
2014-01-06 09:46:04 PM  

C18H27NO3: If you were the absolute supreme being [...] You wouldn't even have to make such a thing as suffering.


Take this as a thought-experiment: Imagine a popular book or movie ("Iron Man 2", Harry Potter and the Unnecessary Sequel, "12 Years a Slave", The Lord of the Rings, etc) and remove all the suffering from it. If there's no conflict, no struggle between good guys and bad guys, no action, every character is just happy and content, the book/movie will be boring as fark. And nobody will read it or want to read it.

If the Creator is an author/director and humans are just actors playing out parts for an audience of beings outside our universe, this provides plausible explanations for the whole Problem Of Evil and why existence is filled with a sense of pervasive unsatisfactoriness. It does raise other troubling questions. What sort of audience would enjoy stories where Joe Sixpack gets colon cancer at 32, can't pay the huge medical bills, and dies painfully, leaving Jane Sixpack with horrible emotional trauma and a young son to support? And what sort of audience would have the actors on stage 24/7 with no green room or even any reassurance that when the gig's over, they can go home and get another gig?

There are flaws in this thought experiment--it's totally untestable, for one--but it provides an understandable/relateable explanation for why suffering exists. Also, every major religious tradition I know of would consider it horribly heretical.

/For further information, consult your pineal gland.
 
2014-01-06 10:37:44 PM  

Inflatable Rhetoric: Popular Opinion: proof that god exists?
even if only in the hearts of the charitable, it is tangible proof of his existence because if the real affect on people's lives.

And proof that god is an asshole, for letting her and her siblings suffer as they did for years.


god doesn't exist in everyone my friend. that is pretty obvious, don't you think.
but thankfully, along with disturbed and worthless slime, there are good people with love and charity (god) in their hearts.
some may not even know it, or might not think of it that way,
god is not a being, he is a way of life, a way of looking at others, the desire to help others and to get joy from that.
 
2014-01-06 10:48:28 PM  
So did everybody answer the survey question before reading the complete story?
 
2014-01-06 11:17:05 PM  

SmithHiller: So did everybody answer the survey question before reading the complete story?


it was one question.
 
2014-01-06 11:33:16 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: Peki: Ah, and there's the guy who says "all religion is BS."

I swear to god it's 1999 again.

Can you prove that it's not bullshiat? Can you prove that people absolutely need to have a book of fairy tales in order to tell them how to live their lives?

Are you saying that churches somehow don't exist in order to control the masses?

/there's a very good reason I farkied you as 'potato' when you started making your rounds


Hmm. My religion teaches that all life deserves dignity and respect. That all have a right to the free search for truth. The right to live in a just society. That all life is interdependent, so we should be mindful of how we treat each other and our environment.

This is BS? Sure, you don't need religion to believe in all that stuff, but it sure helps when you're raising kids and want to be part of a supportive community to have the same beliefs.

And no, I won't claim religion doesn't exist to control the masses, I think it does. Is that always such a bad thing, when you have crap like Wall Street? Might be my age, but I can see the value of a whole community that uses peer pressure to help people get along better.
 
2014-01-06 11:42:37 PM  
Sounds like my mother's life story. And she's a gorgeous red head. Mmm. Time to take a road trip to a greasy spoon.
 
2014-01-07 06:31:20 AM  

C18H27NO3: Is this the story in which god crashed the family car giving the mother an unrecoverable brain injury and making it so the father is unfit to be a father and then moving the children into homes where they were abused only to be moved to another home that they would again be abused and then ultimately having the girl work as a waitress only to be given a small amount of money and told to thank the deity that caused all this to happen in the first place?


The name of that waitress? Albert Einstein.
 
2014-01-07 09:04:23 AM  
Cracker Barrel does take checks, and always has.
 
2014-01-07 09:12:17 AM  
hoark hoark hoark hoark

not as good as a stripper sob story
but a happier ending
 
2014-01-07 11:12:27 AM  
Gee. This article sounds like complete bullshyte. I guess I'd have to be an imbecile to believe a word of this.
 
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