If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Daily Mail)   Dude... leaving your wife and kids by faking your suicide to start a pot farm after you were indicted over a $21m bank fraud is soooo not cool   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 40
    More: Followup, suicides  
•       •       •

7162 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Jan 2014 at 11:56 AM (15 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



40 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-01-04 09:11:10 AM
Beats waitin around to die
 
2014-01-04 10:21:03 AM
Leaving your career as a banker to start a pot farm?
Sounds like a great idea for a "Green Acres" reboot.
 
2014-01-04 11:33:11 AM

bearded clamorer: Leaving your career as a banker to start a pot farm?
Sounds like a great idea for a "Green Acres" reboot.



Green Acres is the place to be
Pot growing is the life for me
Weed spreadin' out so far and wide
Keep Valdosta, I didn't commit suicide
 
2014-01-04 11:51:34 AM
Again, if you're going to fake your death, you need to get more than 100 miles away from where you lived, and you need to be a bit more careful what and how you drive.......

/and while the wife may still love him
//financially, you better divorce his ass
///the dude really farked his family over
 
2014-01-04 12:02:56 PM

twistedmetal: Again, if you're going to fake your death, you need to get more than 100 miles away from where you lived, and you need to be a bit more careful what and how you drive.......

/and while the wife may still love him
//financially, you better divorce his ass
///the dude really farked his family over


While (this) it might've been to access the money he had stashed away in Georgia. $21 million is a lot to move.

That said: tinted windows. Really. I know you're a white man but people who look like dirty hippies don't get the same benefit of the doubt bankers do. Whoops.
 
2014-01-04 12:05:24 PM
Nice. A pastor and a fraudster.
But then I repeat myself.
 
2014-01-04 12:05:43 PM
News flash, subby:  Sociopathy doesn't come with an "off" switch.
 
2014-01-04 12:08:32 PM

twistedmetal: Again, if you're going to fake your death, you need to get more than 100 miles away from where you lived, and you need to be a bit more careful what and how you drive.......


You need to get somewhere where you don't have to drive, ever. If you drive chances are you are going to come in contact with the police at some point because of a violation or an accident or some random "safety check".
 
2014-01-04 12:09:15 PM
This is what all bankers secretly wish they could do.
 
2014-01-04 12:10:52 PM

lordjupiter: This is what all bankers secretly wish they could do.


And we all not-secretly want them to do
 
2014-01-04 12:12:19 PM
It actually is pretty cool.
 
2014-01-04 12:14:14 PM
Time for the real suicide.
 
2014-01-04 12:25:55 PM
I'm shocked that a banker of all people would fark people over for his own benefit, like some kind of sociopath only interested in his own wealth.
 
2014-01-04 12:28:25 PM
FTFA: "'Some of the preacher folks who invested their money were fairly hostile toward Rebekah,' said Holt.
The aspersions became so hot that the widow was fearing reprisals."

Hot aspersions? Who could those be from... hmmm... I wonder...
carolcassara.com
 
2014-01-04 12:30:46 PM

DrewCurtisJr: twistedmetal: Again, if you're going to fake your death, you need to get more than 100 miles away from where you lived, and you need to be a bit more careful what and how you drive.......

You need to get somewhere where you don't have to drive, ever. If you drive chances are you are going to come in contact with the police at some point because of a violation or an accident or some random "safety check".


The dumb ass  got popped for having tinted windows, this seems like an invitation to get stopped.
 
2014-01-04 12:33:05 PM
What if I accidentally kill the au pair (after mistaking her for my wife) and then disappear completely?

Is that okay?

/Lucan-style
 
2014-01-04 12:38:14 PM
Special kind of stupid, this guy.
 
2014-01-04 12:39:50 PM
He was living the dream no wife or kids or 9-5 commitment and he threw it all away. Any married man that says he doesn't dream of faking his own death and taking off is either a liar or just hasn't been married long enough.
 
2014-01-04 12:46:31 PM

bearded clamorer: Leaving your career as a banker to start a pot farm?
Sounds like a great idea for a "Green Acres" reboot.


www.maggiore.net
 
2014-01-04 12:53:40 PM
And, on top of that, she will probably have to pay back the SS that she received from the government.  Triple whammy.
 
2014-01-04 01:07:33 PM
As someone who lost his father to suicide at age eleven, nothing could have made me happier than to find out my father was still alive. Those poor kids are going to have issues all their lives. I can't think of a shiattier thing for that man to do than fake suicide. I hope he lives friendless and without family, for a long time in prison. Farker!
 
2014-01-04 01:10:42 PM
Um, if the picture in the article is his grow op I don't really think it qualifies as a "farm."
 
2014-01-04 01:12:25 PM

StreetlightInTheGhetto: While (this) it might've been to access the money he had stashed away in Georgia. $21 million is a lot to move.


qph.cf.quoracdn.net


Yeah, imagine missing out on your storage rent because you were in jail.....

 
2014-01-04 01:14:09 PM

UNAUTHORIZED FINGER: As someone who lost his father to suicide at age eleven, nothing could have made me happier than to find out my father was still alive. Those poor kids are going to have issues all their lives. I can't think of a shiattier thing for that man to do than fake suicide. I hope he lives friendless and without family, for a long time in prison. Farker!


He was looking at going to prison and may have been planning on covertly contacting his family at some point.
 
2014-01-04 01:27:02 PM
the bar for pot farm is pretty low I see..
 
2014-01-04 01:27:22 PM

DrewCurtisJr: UNAUTHORIZED FINGER: As someone who lost his father to suicide at age eleven, nothing could have made me happier than to find out my father was still alive. Those poor kids are going to have issues all their lives. I can't think of a shiattier thing for that man to do than fake suicide. I hope he lives friendless and without family, for a long time in prison. Farker!

He was looking at going to prison and may have been planning on covertly contacting his family at some point.


Yeah, I'm a bit maudlin today; I just found out my uncle passed away, less than two hours ago. I think I'm done posting for the day.
 
2014-01-04 01:45:22 PM
Yes.  Yes,it is.
 
2014-01-04 01:58:03 PM

twistedmetal: StreetlightInTheGhetto: While (this) it might've been to access the money he had stashed away in Georgia. $21 million is a lot to move.
[qph.cf.quoracdn.net image 600x690]
Yeah, imagine missing out on your storage rent because you were in jail.....


That reminds me...does anyone else think he has a resemblance to Saul Goodman?

i.dailymail.co.uk  fbexternal-a.akamaihd.net
 
2014-01-04 01:59:44 PM
Seems like a case of arrested development or possibly bad behavior.

But I have to admit I love the Green Acres idea. Sounds like a winner.
 
2014-01-04 02:02:06 PM

FatherChaos: twistedmetal: StreetlightInTheGhetto: While (this) it might've been to access the money he had stashed away in Georgia. $21 million is a lot to move.
[qph.cf.quoracdn.net image 600x690]
Yeah, imagine missing out on your storage rent because you were in jail.....

That reminds me...does anyone else think he has a resemblance to Saul Goodman?

[i.dailymail.co.uk image 306x423]  [fbexternal-a.akamaihd.net image 306x408]


He wished he could have called Saul.
 
2014-01-04 02:07:47 PM
img.fark.netimg.fark.net
 
2014-01-04 02:16:21 PM

Rigger1955: DrewCurtisJr: twistedmetal: Again, if you're going to fake your death, you need to get more than 100 miles away from where you lived, and you need to be a bit more careful what and how you drive.......

You need to get somewhere where you don't have to drive, ever. If you drive chances are you are going to come in contact with the police at some point because of a violation or an accident or some random "safety check".

The dumb ass  got popped for having tinted windows, this seems like an invitation to get stopped.


The woman who held my job before me was on the run for killing her husband. He got caught by failing to use her turn signal in another state. Since she was wanted for murder, they quickly unraveled her fake identity (she was Hispanic and had bought someone else's papers) when the cop spotted her fake license and brought her in and ran her prints. She now is looking for prison pen pals online last I heard.
 
2014-01-04 02:22:23 PM

Wild Eyed and Wicked: Rigger1955: DrewCurtisJr: twistedmetal: Again, if you're going to fake your death, you need to get more than 100 miles away from where you lived, and you need to be a bit more careful what and how you drive.......

You need to get somewhere where you don't have to drive, ever. If you drive chances are you are going to come in contact with the police at some point because of a violation or an accident or some random "safety check".

The dumb ass  got popped for having tinted windows, this seems like an invitation to get stopped.

The woman who held my job before me was on the run for killing her husband. He got caught by failing to use her turn signal in another state. Since she was wanted for murder, they quickly unraveled her fake identity (she was Hispanic and had bought someone else's papers) when the cop spotted her fake license and brought her in and ran her prints. She now is looking for prison pen pals online last I heard.


imagine the pressure of filling that job and how crappy it'd make you feel if everyone was like "damn, I wish the lady who killed her husband still worked here this guy's a putz, stupid turn signals"... "Yeah tell me about it, Maria was so fun, I loved the parties she would throw for everyone on their birthday, those cakes were phenomenal and she used to make the vulgar pinatas herself, how cool is that... now we got captain boring"
 
2014-01-04 04:35:44 PM
I knew this guy very well many years ago. Ill have to say that I would have never guessed he would have done any of this.
 
2014-01-04 05:22:58 PM

MaxSupernova: I knew this guy very well many years ago. Ill have to say that I would have never guessed he would have done any of this.

R

eally? That is pretty bizarre, would it be weird if I asked for any other details about his life that you can recall other than the newspeak from TFA?
 
2014-01-04 05:38:20 PM

Rigger1955: The dumb ass got popped for having tinted windows, this seems like an invitation to get stopped.


Doesn't EVERYBODY know this already? If you're on the lam or engaged in illegal activity you DON'T invite police attention. For example, when driving keep your "sound system" turned down, your head and tail lights working and covered, your windows transparent and you muffler off the road. Do your best to be invisible or at least keep from standing out from whatever "normal" is in your area; if in doubt, refer to whatever middle-aged middle-class white people are like on TV.

Yes I know it's "inauthentic" and so on, you want to "be real," but this is the same advice older people were giving me when I was a teenager in the '70s wondering why the police were always bothering me when I wore my purple cowboy boots, patched up jeans, hair halfway to my waist and a sex-drug-&-rock'n'roll themed T-shirt. "No ossifer, I'm not carrying anything illegal because I know you'll be farking with me. And I do not know anything about anything illegal going on around here: people see you stopping me all the time and won't tell me anything you might get me to tell you. In fact I haven't gotten stoned in two weeks since the last time you made a big show of harrasing me in public. You're killing my social life." At least I learned to avoid carrying any "illegal substance" or "contraband jewelry" while I bebopped down the street singing show tunes to myself. ("Shinin' streamin' gleamin' flaxen waxen.") These days I'd probably insist on getting FARK THE POLICE tattooed on my forehead.

And the obvious corrollary is that since I'm such an obvious loudmouth on th Intertubes you can bet my real life is dreadfully boring. I'd make the cops get a warrant not because I'm afraid they'll find anything but because I know my rights and don't mind showing it. (Besides, I'm a prick.)

In short, unless you want attention from the police don't go around virtually hollering "Yoo-hoo, Mister Police! Look at ME!!" And if I can figure this stuff out anybody can. Really.
 
2014-01-04 05:50:32 PM

Rigger1955: The dumb ass got popped for having tinted windows, this seems like an invitation to get stopped.



When you get behind the wheel the cops can pretty much pull you over under any pretext. I don't know why you would put yourself in that position if you are a fugitive.


Wild Eyed and Wicked: The woman who held my job before me was on the run for killing her husband. He got caught by failing to use her turn signal in another state. Since she was wanted for murder, they quickly unraveled her fake identity (she was Hispanic and had bought someone else's papers) when the cop spotted her fake license and brought her in and ran her prints. She now is looking for prison pen pals online last I heard.


This is actually how most military deserters are caught (aside from the ones who turn themselves in).  Some people are shocked, they've been hiding in plain sight for a decade a more, not trying very hard to hide so after a while they think they are in the clear and all is forgotten. Then they get pulled over and next thing they know they are in the custody of the military police.
 
2014-01-04 05:59:55 PM

Sybarite: bearded clamorer: Leaving your career as a banker to start a pot farm?
Sounds like a great idea for a "Green Acres" reboot.


Green Acres is the place to be
Pot growing is the life for me
Weed spreadin' out so far and wide
Keep Valdosta, I didn't commit suicide



Well played.
 
2014-01-04 11:56:24 PM

R1mbaud: MaxSupernova: I knew this guy very well many years ago. Ill have to say that I would have never guessed he would have done any of this.

Really? That is pretty bizarre, would it be weird if I asked for any other details about his life that you can recall other than the newspeak from TFA?


I could tell you a lot but it would be nothing but praise. He was the "smart, cool, athletic etc etc" guy that would drive 20 miles out of his way to pick up the poor unpopular kid and make sure that he was included and accepted by group(s) of people who otherwise would have never known the kid existed. It's been hard to separate this guy with the one I knew. Thankfully I've never put much faith in my fellow man and seeing his story makes me glad I never did.
 
2014-01-05 06:33:06 AM

RTOGUY: He was living the dream no wife or kids or 9-5 commitment and he threw it all away. Any married man that says he doesn't dream of faking his own death and taking off is either a liar or just hasn't been married long enough.


How sad that these helpless men were forced into their situations against their will, not unlike the child brides of the 3rd world.
 
Displayed 40 of 40 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report