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(TMZ)   Lindsay Lohan's New Year's resolutions include stealing DJ equipment   (tmz.com ) divider line
    More: Obvious, Lindsay Lohan, Diplo, new year's resolutions, lindsay, TMZ, dance music, sycophants  
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4542 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 01 Jan 2014 at 8:08 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



38 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-01-01 08:23:44 AM  
Omgwhothehellcares.gig

/too lazy to even go find it
 
2014-01-01 08:29:03 AM  
Well, she can still make out with her mom, and in the end, isn't that what really matters?
 
2014-01-01 08:37:26 AM  
This girl can literally NOT stay out of "clubs". I do not understand the attraction.
 
2014-01-01 08:50:01 AM  
She does know that Paris arrives on time and actually works, right?  Yes I just held up Paris Hilton as an example for LiLo.  Don't forget to tip your waitress for wiping down all of the Scanner exploded brain chunks.
 
2014-01-01 09:01:19 AM  

pueblonative: She does know that Paris arrives on time and actually works, right?  Yes I just held up Paris Hilton as an example for LiLo.  Don't forget to tip your waitress for wiping down all of the Scanner exploded brain chunks.


You've got to be shiatting me.

As for Hilton setting an example for LiLo, is that sort of like saying you should have had richer parents?
 
2014-01-01 09:06:49 AM  
Lindsay Lohan / Paris Hilton
Jello Wrestling to the Death Pay Per View.

/I am going to be so freaking rich!!!!
 
2014-01-01 09:26:13 AM  
Will someone please explain to me how DJ's are ranked. What makes a great DJ? How does someone become a great DJ? I just don't get that.........
 
2014-01-01 09:33:46 AM  

tkgeisha: Will someone please explain to me how DJ's are ranked. What makes a great DJ? How does someone become a great DJ? I just don't get that.........


oi43.tinypic.com: "Simple, tell your wife you're going to your mistress, tell your mistress you're going to your wife, then go to club and learn, learn, learn!"
 
2014-01-01 09:46:14 AM  
I can see her doing something like this in a couple days? probably?  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sb1yGyvrYDc
 
2014-01-01 09:56:16 AM  

tkgeisha: Will someone please explain to me how DJ's are ranked. What makes a great DJ? How does someone become a great DJ? I just don't get that.........


Since I'm a jaded former raver, I have no idea what defines a great DJ today.  Hopefully it's the things that defined a great DJ back when I still went to parties on the regular.  But it boiled down to track selection, set programming, and mixing.  The whole idea is to mix tracks seamlessly back to back so that folks on the dancefloor have something to dance to.  If a DJ is good, their set would start in one place and end in a completely different place.  Guys like Mark Farina or Miguel Migs will cover multiple styles of house music, change up the tempo, and mix tracks creatively.  You would go see a DJ in hopes they'd play your favorite tune, but really it was all about new stuff.

Now, DJs are more like rock stars.  They pre-record sets, only do hit parades, and rarely ever stray from whatever their chosen subgenre is.
 
x23
2014-01-01 10:28:32 AM  
Major Lazer is major garbage.

one of the worst DJs i think i've ever heard in my life.
 
2014-01-01 10:35:43 AM  

tkgeisha: Will someone please explain to me how DJ's are ranked. What makes a great DJ? How does someone become a great DJ? I just don't get that.........


Mainstream DJs?  There's a magazine called DJ Mag and it publishes a list once a year of the top 100 DJs.

The list is supposedly made based on votes from readers.  The truth is the entire list is completely made up by DJ Mag, probably based on whatever record labels are paying the most for advertisements.

Forbes also has a list of which DJs are paid the most, no surprise it mirrors the DJ Mag Top 100.
 
2014-01-01 10:47:18 AM  

question_dj: Now, DJs are more like rock stars.  They pre-record sets, only do hit parades, and rarely ever stray from whatever their chosen subgenre is.


rock stars tend to write their own music, not remix tracks already written by actual artists and remixed for "dance" music. Sure the top 5 get a boatload of cash, anyone in any field at the top of their level would get payed a ton.
The average DJ around here? a few hundred a night - this one AC/DC tribute band that comes around and plays makes more money then the typical DJ does.

/People hire "paris hilton" for the brand name, would you rather hire "DJ Who gives a fark" or someone who might be a house hold name? yeah sadly...it works like this
 
2014-01-01 10:53:01 AM  

Misconduc: remix tracks already written by actual artists and remixed for "dance" music.


That's remixing, not DJing
 
2014-01-01 10:54:21 AM  
I'm gonna get reamed but I just don't get why DJs are good or bad. If it's about the music then they should seem invisible. If it's more like they're the MC, then there's less music. Watched  a couple on a NYE show last night, bouncing around and fiddling with knobs and I'm thinking: WTF is this?

But I hate clubs so what would I know.
 
2014-01-01 11:10:27 AM  
Oh, DJ equipment.
 
2014-01-01 11:15:47 AM  

Misconduc: question_dj: Now, DJs are more like rock stars.  They pre-record sets, only do hit parades, and rarely ever stray from whatever their chosen subgenre is.

rock stars tend to write their own music, not remix tracks already written by actual artists and remixed for "dance" music. Sure the top 5 get a boatload of cash, anyone in any field at the top of their level would get payed a ton.
The average DJ around here? a few hundred a night - this one AC/DC tribute band that comes around and plays makes more money then the typical DJ does.

/People hire "paris hilton" for the brand name, would you rather hire "DJ Who gives a fark" or someone who might be a house hold name? yeah sadly...it works like this


*scratches head* Most professional DJs also produce music.  But they opt to DJ instead of put on a live show.
 
2014-01-01 11:19:01 AM  

edmo: I'm gonna get reamed but I just don't get why DJs are good or bad. If it's about the music then they should seem invisible. If it's more like they're the MC, then there's less music. Watched  a couple on a NYE show last night, bouncing around and fiddling with knobs and I'm thinking: WTF is this?

But I hate clubs so what would I know.


I do video and audio editing so I know that there's some technical aspect into what some DJs do. I have serious doubt that these girls know anything about these elements. But I could be wrong. But I'm probably not.
 
2014-01-01 11:23:55 AM  
Top-5 wedding reception songs that allow the DJ to take a decent dump:

1. "I Would Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That) - Meatloaf
2. "Paradise by Dashboard Light" - Meatloaf
3. "Red, Red, Wine" - UB40
4. "1999 (extended version)" - Prince
5. "Disco Inferno (12" mix)" - The Trammps
 
2014-01-01 11:32:04 AM  

edmo: I'm gonna get reamed but I just don't get why DJs are good or bad. If it's about the music then they should seem invisible. If it's more like they're the MC, then there's less music. Watched  a couple on a NYE show last night, bouncing around and fiddling with knobs and I'm thinking: WTF is this?


95% any DJ who bounces around and looks like they're fiddling knobs is a complete phony.  Modern software will beat match for you and since you can set cue points and everything ahead of time, it's as easy as pie.

You know when a real DJ is actually doing their job because they're concentrating on their work, not waving their hands in the air or jumping into the crowd.  They have headphones on and you can watch them cue up tracks and do actual EQ adjustments and cross fades.

DJs should be invisible, but the mainstream side has seen to it that DJs are the new superstars and should be worshiped.

It's a great trick, because a lot of these fakers are charging $100-500 for shows and they are literally doing very little while on stage.  In fact, Deadmau5 himself said anyone with an hours worth of training could do his job.

But a real DJ like Jeff Mills or Frankie Bones?  Yeah, they really are amazing and not everyone could do what they do.
 
2014-01-01 11:43:08 AM  

Glitchwerks: Yeah, they really are amazing and not everyone could do what they do.


I'll have to take your word for it cause it all seems pretty silly to me, but what do I know.....
 
2014-01-01 12:07:06 PM  
img.fark.net
Oblig.
 
2014-01-01 12:42:38 PM  
She wants to be a Dick Jockey?

But, isn't she already?
 
2014-01-01 12:59:01 PM  
schmoesknow.com
I am the DJ, I am what I play
I got believers believing in me...
 
2014-01-01 01:02:45 PM  
Ranked #1 DJ

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-01-01 01:24:58 PM  

The Pope of Manwich Village: Top-5 wedding reception songs that allow the DJ to take a decent dump:

1. "I Would Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That) - Meatloaf
2. "Paradise by Dashboard Light" - Meatloaf
3. "Red, Red, Wine" - UB40
4. "1999 (extended version)" - Prince
5. "Disco Inferno (12" mix)" - The Trammps


Too bad for DJs that 50-year old people don't have a lot of wedding receptions.
 
2014-01-01 01:29:24 PM  

Glitchwerks: But a real DJ like Jeff Mills or Frankie Bones? Yeah, they really are amazing and not everyone could do what they do.


It takes amazing skills to plug your iPod into a big sound system and press Play.
 
2014-01-01 01:36:47 PM  

jaytkay: The Pope of Manwich Village: Top-5 wedding reception songs that allow the DJ to take a decent dump:

1. "I Would Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That) - Meatloaf
2. "Paradise by Dashboard Light" - Meatloaf
3. "Red, Red, Wine" - UB40
4. "1999 (extended version)" - Prince
5. "Disco Inferno (12" mix)" - The Trammps

Too bad for DJs that 50-year old people don't have a lot of wedding receptions.


Thankfully, there are plenty of 50-year-old wedding DJs who do not know their audience - and eat at Taco Bell.
 
2014-01-01 03:08:07 PM  
I didn't know you could get pointers on how to be a DJ just by coking up and sucking one off.
 
2014-01-01 03:27:30 PM  

jaytkay: Glitchwerks: But a real DJ like Jeff Mills or Frankie Bones? Yeah, they really are amazing and not everyone could do what they do.

It takes amazing skills to plug your iPod into a big sound system and press Play.


I am always glad when people advertise how stupid they are, thanks
 
2014-01-01 03:45:04 PM  

gfid: pueblonative: She does know that Paris arrives on time and actually works, right?  Yes I just held up Paris Hilton as an example for LiLo.  Don't forget to tip your waitress for wiping down all of the Scanner exploded brain chunks.

You've got to be shiatting me.

As for Hilton setting an example for LiLo, is that sort of like saying you should have had richer parents?


I know, I know.  However, when was the last time you heard about Paris Hilton showing up late, or so farked up she couldn't even "work", or stealing the equipment?  I have no idea of the level of her talent or LiLo's--never watched the videos.  But I do know about LiLo's past "work experience".  Doesn't seem to bode well for somebody trying to get into a new career.
 
2014-01-01 04:22:08 PM  
I'm actually rooting for Lilo to learn the craft, kick some ass and steal Paris's Ibiza gig, leaving Little Miss Lazy Eye crying in a heap wondering how it all went wrong.
 
2014-01-01 04:23:35 PM  
I dunno, dude looks like he's having a blast

girl talk

(skip about 2:00 in to get past intro)


I d/l'd 'All Day'

Fun shiat
 
2014-01-01 04:24:30 PM  
I also hope she takes the name "DJ Firecrotch"

/FU Paris
 
2014-01-01 05:30:24 PM  

gfid: You've got to be shiatting me.
As for Hilton setting an example for LiLo, is that sort of like saying you should have had richer parents?


We can hate Paris Hilton all we want, but I think the woman has worked pretty hard. She's made millions a year doing whatever it is that she does--selling her "brand," I guess. But that's work too. I don't know about her talent for DJing--I haven't been clubbing since....whenever that was.

jaytkay: The Pope of Manwich Village: Top-5 wedding reception songs that allow the DJ to take a decent dump:
1. "I Would Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That) - Meatloaf
2. "Paradise by Dashboard Light" - Meatloaf
3. "Red, Red, Wine" - UB40
4. "1999 (extended version)" - Prince
5. "Disco Inferno (12" mix)" - The Trammps
Too bad for DJs that 50-year old people don't have a lot of wedding receptions.


Ha. I"m working at this place that must have a satellite radio feed of 70's music. The other night I heard Paradise by the Dashboard lights--I swear I haven't heard that song in 20 years. And some of the other songs I haven't heard since the 70's.
But I like Red Red Wine. I have that one on my ipod (the UB40 version). 1983. Holy fark, I 'm old.
 
2014-01-01 07:16:22 PM  
"She wasn't spinning, but she was getting pointers from the 2 guys for hours."

The most unintentionally filthy line I have ever read.

Or maybe it's just how I read it.
 
2014-01-02 12:45:09 AM  

LarryDan43: I can see her doing something like this in a couple days? probably?  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sb1yGyvrYDc


I watched this entire video and didn't understand what the white girls dancing in the corner were doing. That is some awkward dancing!
 
2014-01-02 09:29:19 AM  
Why are DJs considered celebrities anyway? All they do is play shiatty farking music.
 
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