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(Komo)   Man is gifted gun, accidentally shoots wife. Wife is gifted the trump card for every future disagreement the couple ever has. Ever   (komonews.com ) divider line
    More: Amusing, trumps, gifts, dispute, guns  
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3527 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Dec 2013 at 11:52 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



45 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-12-31 11:55:13 AM  
This is why only the police should have access to firearms!
 
2013-12-31 11:55:51 AM  
Lulz. It's true.
 
2013-12-31 11:55:57 AM  
Things to remember when giving someone a gun as a Christmas present:

1) Make sure the gun isn't loaded.

2) No eggnog beforehand.

3) Seriously, don't hand someone a loaded gun unless there's a damn good reason.
 
2013-12-31 11:58:04 AM  
I don't think I would stay married to someone so grossly negligent.
 
2013-12-31 11:58:43 AM  
Another case of Glock wife?
 
2013-12-31 12:00:19 PM  
This is what I never understand about all these "accidental" shootings...

Even when a gun is loaded, you have to pull the trigger in order to release the hammer that actually fires the bullet.  When the gun is not cocked, the hammer is at rest, and unless you pull the trigger pretty friggin hard, it's not going to cock itself and release.  This is even true with semi-automatics.  You have to cock it first.  THEN it has a hair trigger.  THEN it will automatically cock itself with the recoil from the shot.

So how does one accidentally shoot someone?
 
2013-12-31 12:04:01 PM  
Pearl necklace....
 
2013-12-31 12:04:24 PM  

durbnpoisn: This is what I never understand about all these "accidental" shootings...

Even when a gun is loaded, you have to pull the trigger in order to release the hammer that actually fires the bullet.  When the gun is not cocked, the hammer is at rest, and unless you pull the trigger pretty friggin hard, it's not going to cock itself and release.  This is even true with semi-automatics.  You have to cock it first.  THEN it has a hair trigger.  THEN it will automatically cock itself with the recoil from the shot.

So how does one accidentally shoot someone?


A Glock (and a few others) have no hammer. It's striker fired. It's never cocked. If there's a round in the chamber, you pull the trigger and boom. It's basically a double action pistol all the time.
 
2013-12-31 12:04:32 PM  

durbnpoisn: This is what I never understand about all these "accidental" shootings...

Even when a gun is loaded, you have to pull the trigger in order to release the hammer that actually fires the bullet.  When the gun is not cocked, the hammer is at rest, and unless you pull the trigger pretty friggin hard, it's not going to cock itself and release.  This is even true with semi-automatics.  You have to cock it first.  THEN it has a hair trigger.  THEN it will automatically cock itself with the recoil from the shot.

So how does one accidentally shoot someone?


Sometimes people do a lot of the wrong thing consecutively.  My uncle is a bit of a gun nut, Ive never seen him mishandle a gun and he is very fastidious about things typically.  He still managed to shoot a hole through all the clothes lined up on one side of his closet.  Happened to be his wifes side, she was kind of happy she got to go do a bunch of shopping.
 
2013-12-31 12:05:10 PM  
"You'll shoot your wife's eye out"
 
2013-12-31 12:08:46 PM  

durbnpoisn: This is what I never understand about all these "accidental" shootings...

Even when a gun is loaded, you have to pull the trigger in order to release the hammer that actually fires the bullet.  When the gun is not cocked, the hammer is at rest, and unless you pull the trigger pretty friggin hard, it's not going to cock itself and release.  This is even true with semi-automatics.  You have to cock it first.  THEN it has a hair trigger.  THEN it will automatically cock itself with the recoil from the shot.

So how does one accidentally shoot someone?


Since you're not supposed to point a firearm at anything you're not willing to destroy, the answer is stupidity.  Stupidity is the answer we are looking for.
 
2013-12-31 12:11:16 PM  
Thats his story and he's sticking to it.
 
2013-12-31 12:11:35 PM  
Did she give him a loaded gun for Christmas?  Did he decide to load it up to fondle it?  Why was he putting a loaded gun in a safe?  Was she inside the safe and that's why the muzzle was pointed at her?

Too many questions left unanswered. 

Of course, terminal stupidity appears to be the actual answer.
 
2013-12-31 12:13:54 PM  
Possibly, though I'd think the potential for shooting her again would still be the queen of clubs.
 
2013-12-31 12:14:22 PM  

Mr. Eugenides: This is why only the police should have access to firearms!


So they can shoot your wife?
 
2013-12-31 12:16:02 PM  

Mr. Eugenides: This is why only the police

people with proper training should have access to firearms!

If I need a license to drive (which I can't get without passing a proficiency test), I should need a license for a gun that requires at least passing a gun safety course.
 
2013-12-31 12:20:51 PM  

ManateeGag: Mr. Eugenides: This is why only the police people with proper training should have access to firearms!

If I need a license to drive (which I can't get without passing a proficiency test), I should need a license for a gun that requires at least passing a gun safety course.


So you want to punish the poor and minorities, who can't afford to take a gun safety course?

Next you're going to require they have a valid ID to vote in an election.
 
2013-12-31 12:21:36 PM  
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-12-31 12:22:58 PM  
Wife was heard to say her husband may as well never even asking for another BJ. He shot his last load.
 
2013-12-31 12:23:21 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: ManateeGag: Mr. Eugenides: This is why only the police people with proper training should have access to firearms!

If I need a license to drive (which I can't get without passing a proficiency test), I should need a license for a gun that requires at least passing a gun safety course.

So you want to punish the poor and minorities, who can't afford to take a gun safety course?

Next you're going to require they have a valid ID to vote in an election.


Hey!  That's conservative fascism!
 
2013-12-31 12:25:32 PM  

ManateeGag: Mr. Eugenides: This is why only the police people with proper training should have access to firearms!

If I need a license to drive (which I can't get without passing a proficiency test), I should need a license for a gun that requires at least passing a gun safety course.


Requiring people to demonstrate proficiency doesn't require that we stipulate where or how they acquire the knowledge - we don't do that with cars.
 
2013-12-31 12:29:27 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: ManateeGag: Mr. Eugenides: This is why only the police people with proper training should have access to firearms!

If I need a license to drive (which I can't get without passing a proficiency test), I should need a license for a gun that requires at least passing a gun safety course.

So you want to punish the poor and minorities, who can't afford to take a gun safety course?

Next you're going to require they have a valid ID to vote in an election.


Or we could, oh, I don't know, teach firearm safety and marksmanship in public schools as a required course like we used to?
 
2013-12-31 12:30:37 PM  
This guy is a "gifted gun"?
 
2013-12-31 12:32:20 PM  

jso2897: ManateeGag: Mr. Eugenides: This is why only the police people with proper training should have access to firearms!

If I need a license to drive (which I can't get without passing a proficiency test), I should need a license for a gun that requires at least passing a gun safety course.

Requiring people to demonstrate proficiency doesn't require that we stipulate where or how they acquire the knowledge - we don't do that with cars.


Sorry. You were saying?
 
2013-12-31 12:35:58 PM  
What's the problem? Isn't that what guns are designed for? What other use do they have?
 
2013-12-31 12:39:22 PM  
Is there anything to say about guns anymore? Neither side listens to the other, what's the point?
 
2013-12-31 12:41:46 PM  

demaL-demaL-yeH: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: ManateeGag: Mr. Eugenides: This is why only the police people with proper training should have access to firearms!

If I need a license to drive (which I can't get without passing a proficiency test), I should need a license for a gun that requires at least passing a gun safety course.

So you want to punish the poor and minorities, who can't afford to take a gun safety course?

Next you're going to require they have a valid ID to vote in an election.

Or we could, oh, I don't know, teach firearm safety and marksmanship in public schools as a required course like we used to?


Dare I ask, who exactly does the second "we" encompass?
 
2013-12-31 12:44:09 PM  
17seconds.co.uk
You're supposed to KILL her, dumbass. Then SAY it was an accident.
 
2013-12-31 12:46:44 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: ManateeGag: Mr. Eugenides: This is why only the police people with proper training should have access to firearms!

If I need a license to drive (which I can't get without passing a proficiency test), I should need a license for a gun that requires at least passing a gun safety course.

So you want to punish the poor and minorities, who can't afford to take a gun safety course?

Next you're going to require they have a valid ID to vote in an election.


But from what I keep hearing, voting is a right of the people granted by the Constitution and you can't put undue strain or impose costs on people to exercise the right.... whereas guns are, well, hm. I see the conundrum in that line of thought.
 
2013-12-31 12:49:55 PM  
img843.imageshack.us

Look, I'm sorry for shooting EVERYBODY!
/One of my favorite lines.
 
2013-12-31 12:50:49 PM  
So apparently fark blatantly ignores height/with tags in posts, even if they work in previews?
 
2013-12-31 01:06:11 PM  

Sim Tree: So apparently fark blatantly ignores height/with tags in posts, even if they work in previews?


"Blatantly"?
 
2013-12-31 01:21:46 PM  

SwiftFox: This guy is a "gifted gun"?


Using "gift" as verb is Palin-level retardation.
 
2013-12-31 01:56:52 PM  

jso2897: ManateeGag: Mr. Eugenides: This is why only the police people with proper training should have access to firearms!

If I need a license to drive (which I can't get without passing a proficiency test), I should need a license for a gun that requires at least passing a gun safety course.

Requiring people to demonstrate proficiency doesn't require that we stipulate where or how they acquire the knowledge - we don't do that with cars.


I still have to take a road test as well as a written test before they hand me a license to drive.
 
2013-12-31 02:01:00 PM  

AspectRatio: What's the problem? Isn't that what guns are designed for? What other use do they have?


How else am I going to hold onto six donuts at once?
 
2013-12-31 02:04:47 PM  

ElLoco: But from what I keep hearing, voting is a right of the people granted by the Constitution and you can't put undue strain or impose costs on people to exercise the right.... whereas guns are, well, hm. I see the conundrum in that line of thought.


Also, don't forget that The Constitution was written back when they only had muskets and clearly the founding fathers didn't mean for anyone to have super-turbo-supercharged-baby-killing-assault rifles.....whereas freedom of speech over phones, internet, social, and mass media can't be limited because The Constitutional 1st ammendment and, well, hmm, I see a conundrum...
 
2013-12-31 02:31:05 PM  

DarwinianReject: ElLoco: But from what I keep hearing, voting is a right of the people granted by the Constitution and you can't put undue strain or impose costs on people to exercise the right.... whereas guns are, well, hm. I see the conundrum in that line of thought.

Also, don't forget that The Constitution was written back when they only had muskets and clearly the founding fathers didn't mean for anyone to have super-turbo-supercharged-baby-killing-assault rifles.....whereas freedom of speech over phones, internet, social, and mass media can't be limited because The Constitutional 1st ammendment and, well, hmm, I see a conundrum...


Muskets WERE the military "assault rifles" of the day.  They were the pinnacle of technology.  In fact, some civilians even owned the cannon that were used by the militia.  That rule was in place from the French-Indian War, before Independence was even considered, and was the 2nd item that was added to the Bill of Rights.  260 years.

Voting has only been universal since 1965 in the US.  49 years.

Freedom of Speech shouldn't be limited, neither should the right to keep and bear arms.
 
2013-12-31 02:38:15 PM  

AngryDragon: Freedom of Speech shouldn't be limited, neither should the right to keep and bear arms.


Right.  I'm not condoning limiting either.  I just like to point out the hypocrisy of claiming the 2nd amendment shouldn't evolve to include current technology while also demanding modern communications and media should be covered by the 1st.  Goose.  Gander.  All that jazz.
 
2013-12-31 03:23:41 PM  

ManateeGag: jso2897: ManateeGag: Mr. Eugenides: This is why only the police people with proper training should have access to firearms!

If I need a license to drive (which I can't get without passing a proficiency test), I should need a license for a gun that requires at least passing a gun safety course.

Requiring people to demonstrate proficiency doesn't require that we stipulate where or how they acquire the knowledge - we don't do that with cars.

I still have to take a road test as well as a written test before they hand me a license to drive.


Try carrying a gun around in public without a license. That'll net you an arrest in most places*. You don't need a license to own a cary.

*constitutional carry states not withstanding
 
2013-12-31 04:57:55 PM  
gifted?

fark you, generation of dumbasses
 
2013-12-31 09:04:28 PM  
He didn't accidentally shoot her, he negligently shot her, and he should be arrested and charged.
 
2013-12-31 11:53:33 PM  
If you ever want to murder someone just shout, "DON'T WORRY, IT'S NOT LOADED, SEE?" and fire square in the chest. Then you can't be charged with a crime!
 
2014-01-01 12:30:27 AM  

durbnpoisn: This is what I never understand about all these "accidental" shootings...

Even when a gun is loaded, you have to pull the trigger in order to release the hammer that actually fires the bullet.  When the gun is not cocked, the hammer is at rest, and unless you pull the trigger pretty friggin hard, it's not going to cock itself and release.  This is even true with semi-automatics.  You have to cock it first.  THEN it has a hair trigger.  THEN it will automatically cock itself with the recoil from the shot.

So how does one accidentally shoot someone?


Well... you could be playing Quick Draw McGraw with your new handgun.....
Or maybe you try to accidently discharge it at your wife, eff it up and not kill her, and report that you were putting the gun in the safe and it went off.
 
2014-01-01 12:32:57 AM  

ManateeGag: Mr. Eugenides: This is why only the police people with proper training should have access to firearms!

If I need a license to drive (which I can't get without passing a proficiency test), I should need a license for a gun that requires at least passing a gun safety course.


Possibly true, if you can point out where it mentions a drivers license in the Constitution.
 
2014-01-01 12:35:37 AM  

monoski: Wife was heard to say her husband may as well never even asking for another BJ. He shot his last load.


You dont ask for one.  You just tell her it is that time of the week.
 
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