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(MLive.com)   Young man wishes he had the privacy to wipe his poop on things at home   (mlive.com) divider line 53
    More: Strange, local church  
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6769 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Dec 2013 at 3:34 PM (51 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-12-30 02:36:59 PM  
"He stated that he lives in an apartment with his mother and father and does not have enough privacy to do the things he wants," the deputy wrote in his report, contained in court records.

Parents are so lame and hygienic.
 
2013-12-30 03:10:07 PM  

Diogenes: "He stated that he lives in an apartment with his mother and father and does not have enough privacy to do the things he wants," the deputy wrote in his report, contained in court records.

Parents are so lame and hygienic.


I am wondering what type of privacy is in his future.
 
2013-12-30 03:38:11 PM  
Wonder what his fark/4chan handle is?

Sounds like the guy knows how to party.
 
2013-12-30 03:38:19 PM  
Hasn't this kid ever heard of a lock on the bathroom door?
 
2013-12-30 03:39:34 PM  
fc08.deviantart.net
 
2013-12-30 03:39:40 PM  
Excuse me sir We're gonna need to see your asshole.
 
2013-12-30 03:40:02 PM  
Well, he just wanted to say how shiatty the church he attends is, and how priest helps him masturbate. Some people file a police report to say that, he wanted to express it in realism art.
 
v15
2013-12-30 03:40:19 PM  
"When a person is insane, as you clearly are, do you know that you're insane? Maybe you're just sitting around, reading Guns and Ammo, masturbating in your own feces. Do you just stop and go, 'Wow! It is amazing how farking crazy I really am!'? Yeah, do you guys do that?"
 
2013-12-30 03:41:25 PM  
img.photobucket.com
 
2013-12-30 03:42:32 PM  
There is another drain on societies coffers.
 
2013-12-30 03:44:29 PM  
who the f*ck still uses a magazine to jerk off?
 
2013-12-30 03:44:37 PM  

garandman1a: Diogenes: "He stated that he lives in an apartment with his mother and father and does not have enough privacy to do the things he wants," the deputy wrote in his report, contained in court records.

Parents are so lame and hygienic.

I am wondering what type of privacy is in his future.


I predict very little privacy but many opportunities to experience more poop adventures than he ever dreamed of.

Some rusty trombones, dirty sanchezes, and maybe even the coveted cleveland steamer.
 
2013-12-30 03:44:51 PM  
He's a modern day Martin Luther. Theses, feces, what's the big diff?
 
2013-12-30 03:46:53 PM  

calbert: who the f*ck still uses a magazine to jerk off?


At least it wasn't the Sears catalog, those are too heavy to carry around on a bike
 
2013-12-30 03:47:21 PM  
He probably  learned it from that child's book, "Everybody Smears Their Poop on the Church Door".
 
2013-12-30 03:47:24 PM  
"A few days later, a deputy interviewed Gorski. When asked about the last time he went to church, Gorski did not respond."

For some reason, I find this hilarious.
 
2013-12-30 03:50:04 PM  
He's an angry young man seeking attention and counselling. Cut him a break.
Oh, wait.  This is Fark.
What's his handle??
 
2013-12-30 03:51:17 PM  

calbert: who the f*ck still uses a magazine to jerk off?


Teenaged boys who don't get enough privacy at home apparently. Maybe the parent who set the filter on their home computer is really into encryption or something.
 
2013-12-30 03:51:45 PM  
Just wait till you're married with kids. Pooping on the floor then using your own socks to pick up said poop and then smearing it on the door will never be the same.
 
2013-12-30 03:52:48 PM  
If the kid had someone get caught on cam jacking it in the woods or something, I could see his side. But, this, it makes no sense.
 
2013-12-30 03:53:49 PM  
Durr "somehow". Freaking auto-correct.
 
2013-12-30 03:55:06 PM  

Wasilla Hillbilly: Durr "somehow". Freaking auto-correct.


Keep going.
 
2013-12-30 03:59:57 PM  

calbert: who the f*ck still uses a magazine to jerk off?


Well its much better to nut all over a page than it is to nut all over your keyboard.
 
2013-12-30 04:02:21 PM  
Looks like we got a Picasso here, well you'll have all the time in the world to do your poop painting when your living in a VAN down by the RIVER
 
2013-12-30 04:03:21 PM  

bikerbob59: "A few days later, a deputy interviewed Gorski. When asked about the last time he went to church, Gorski did not respond."

For some reason, I find this hilarious.


He lost his faith after Neil Armstrong's shpoutout failed to work
 
2013-12-30 04:03:35 PM  
I must be getting old because now I use a magazine to poop and no magazine for the other thing.
 
2013-12-30 04:04:22 PM  
Did he heel it in the Holy Water?
 
2013-12-30 04:04:51 PM  

Stoj: I must be getting old because now I use a magazine to poop and no magazine for the other thing.


What do you use to smear on church doors then?
 
2013-12-30 04:05:49 PM  

HailRobonia: He's a modern day Martin Luther. Theses, feces, what's the big diff?


Maybe he'll be condemned by a Poopal Bull. er ... I mean Papal Bull.
 
2013-12-30 04:06:20 PM  
Must be some hot looking nuns at that church.
That hes hoping are into poop fetishes.
 
2013-12-30 04:06:22 PM  

HailRobonia: Stoj: I must be getting old because now I use a magazine to poop and no magazine for the other thing.

What do you use to smear on church doors then?


Socks are timeless.
 
2013-12-30 04:08:03 PM  
Did he use the same hand?  Because, eww.
 
2013-12-30 04:15:43 PM  

HailRobonia: Stoj: I must be getting old because now I use a magazine to poop and no magazine for the other thing.

What do you use to smear on church doors then?


Natural propulsion.

Like a sock offers the hand any sort of protection against feces or spunk.
 
2013-12-30 04:19:10 PM  
Glad to see my hometown representing again on Fark. I work in the court system so I may meet him in person soon. The last time Bay City made it on to Fark was when a guy was having sex with a dead dog in public.

http://blog.mlive.com/bctimes/2008/02 /saginaw_man_convicted_of_sex_w. h tml
 
2013-12-30 04:27:07 PM  

triptrap: Glad to see my hometown representing again on Fark. I work in the court system so I may meet him in person soon. The last time Bay City made it on to Fark was when a guy was having sex with a dead dog in public.

http://blog.mlive.com/bctimes/2008/02 /saginaw_man_convicted_of_sex_w. h tml


Who would want to have sex with a dead dog...without lighting it on fire first?

/Pyro-necro-bestiality
 
2013-12-30 04:38:11 PM  

jxb465: triptrap: Glad to see my hometown representing again on Fark. I work in the court system so I may meet him in person soon. The last time Bay City made it on to Fark was when a guy was having sex with a dead dog in public.

http://blog.mlive.com/bctimes/2008/02 /saginaw_man_convicted_of_sex_w. h tml

Who would want to have sex with a dead dog...without lighting it on fire first?

/Pyro-necro-bestiality


He may have gotten there eventually. Sometimes you gotta liven things up a bit when it's the same old routine day-after-day.
 
2013-12-30 04:45:14 PM  
Here is the church, and here is the apse
Open the door and see where he craps
Here's the parson reciting his sermon,
And here's the boy playing Pee Wee Herman
 
2013-12-30 05:08:00 PM  

calbert: who the f*ck still uses a magazine to jerk off?


The paper cuts are brutal.
 
2013-12-30 05:11:57 PM  
He's like a panda.  Craps.  Shoots.  Leaves.
 
2013-12-30 05:29:26 PM  

triptrap: Glad to see my hometown representing again on Fark. I work in the court system so I may meet him in person soon. The last time Bay City made it on to Fark was when a guy was having sex with a dead dog in public.

http://blog.mlive.com/bctimes/2008/02 /saginaw_man_convicted_of_sex_w. h tml


You forgot the chick that dressed as a Boston Marathon victim for Halloween.
 
2013-12-30 05:43:19 PM  

triptrap: Glad to see my hometown representing again on Fark. I work in the court system so I may meet him in person soon. The last time Bay City made it on to Fark was when a guy was having sex with a dead dog in public.

http://blog.mlive.com/bctimes/2008/02 /saginaw_man_convicted_of_sex_w. h tml


But was it in front of a daycare?

/been here too long.
 
2013-12-30 05:58:21 PM  

Lord Farkwad: triptrap: Glad to see my hometown representing again on Fark. I work in the court system so I may meet him in person soon. The last time Bay City made it on to Fark was when a guy was having sex with a dead dog in public.

http://blog.mlive.com/bctimes/2008/02 /saginaw_man_convicted_of_sex_w. h tml

You forgot the chick that dressed as a Boston Marathon victim for Halloween.


I missed that one appearing on Fark. I don't recall her being from Bay City though.
 
2013-12-30 06:43:03 PM  

Hector Remarkable: He probably  learned it from that child's book, "Everybody Smears Their Poop on the Church Door".


Is this the Bay City of bubble gum rock band, the "B ay City Rollers?"
 
2013-12-30 06:49:05 PM  

calbert: who the f*ck still uses a magazine to jerk off?


www.eonline.com

i like to read, ok?
 
2013-12-30 06:55:31 PM  
Dammit, Orton!

/Hide your bags...
 
2013-12-30 06:57:27 PM  

eldie: Hector Remarkable: He probably  learned it from that child's book, "Everybody Smears Their Poop on the Church Door".

Is this the Bay City of bubble gum rock band, the "B ay City Rollers?"


S-A  T-U-R  D-A-Y NIGHT!
 
2013-12-30 07:08:06 PM  
Kid is a serious atheist.  Seriously.
 
2013-12-30 07:15:50 PM  
Talk about a shiatty sock puppet...the kid has no talent whatsoever!
 
2013-12-30 07:34:43 PM  

v15: "When a person is insane, as you clearly are, do you know that you're insane? Maybe you're just sitting around, reading Guns and Ammo, masturbating in your own feces. Do you just stop and go, 'Wow! It is amazing how farking crazy I really am!'? Yeah, do you guys do that?"


Not really. Honestly, I just look at the pictures.
 
2013-12-30 10:19:34 PM  
These  poop-smearing weirdos freak me out.  I just can't begin to fathom how they manage to think this shiat up in the first place.
 
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