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(Agora Cosmopolitan)   "Many speculated that Big Bertha could have hit the side walls of one of the many alien bases on Earth"   (agoracosmopolitan.com ) divider line
    More: Followup, Big Bertha, Seattle, ESL  
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13032 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Dec 2013 at 3:38 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



105 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-12-29 11:49:49 AM  
Cue the birds nest hair "I'm not saying it's aliens" guy
 
2013-12-29 11:53:14 AM  
Uh... yeah
 
2013-12-29 12:11:20 PM  
Something happened that I, as someone with zero knowledge of the field, cannot explain.

Therefore, aliens
 
2013-12-29 12:13:19 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Uh... yeah


I know, right? Like the alien infiltration of the zoning board wouldn't have routed around the alien bases. How naive does he think we are??
 
2013-12-29 12:18:47 PM  
It's a UFB.

/unidentified farking boulder
 
2013-12-29 12:23:46 PM  
Well, at least it wasn't boring.
 
2013-12-29 12:26:53 PM  

stratagos: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Uh... yeah

I know, right? Like the alien infiltration of the zoning board wouldn't have routed around the alien bases. How naive does he think we are??


I think may also be a repeat

/I know the spaceship from Five Million Years To Earth was posted about a dozen times
 
NFA [TotalFark]
2013-12-29 12:27:08 PM  
How is it they know about aliens and UFO's but not big rocks?
 
2013-12-29 12:28:13 PM  
Yep... repeat fro Dec. 11
 
2013-12-29 12:34:01 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Yep... repeat fro Dec. 11


listen not to the heretic! He is here to deceive you. Trust me folks. I was probed by these aliens several summers ago after 2and 1/2  bottles of Cuervo. They are real and they are coming for you. You must prepare yourselves for the end of days. And probing. They really, really like probing.
 
2013-12-29 02:03:01 PM  
Weed is legal in Washington, right?
 
2013-12-29 02:57:26 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-12-29 03:24:45 PM  
www.giantfreakinrobot.com
 
2013-12-29 03:42:38 PM  
They may be on to something.  Here's a pic of me and some of my buddies on the dig standing in front of it:

3.bp.blogspot.com

Why are we dressed like that?  Hey, it's Seattle, it rains a lot.
 
2013-12-29 03:43:44 PM  

SurfaceTension: Cue the birds nest hair "I'm not saying it's aliens" guy


Apparently, crazy hair guy owns a couple of dispensaries. Me thinks that someone is sampling their own product ..
 
2013-12-29 03:44:02 PM  
December 2013 marked a very unforgettable day for the people of Seattle.

Your blog very sucks.
 
2013-12-29 03:44:39 PM  
Well, duh. It's the most reasonable and likely scenario to postulate that the tunnel boring machine hit an alien base.

/Occam wept.
 
2013-12-29 03:45:23 PM  

NewportBarGuy: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Yep... repeat fro Dec. 11

listen not to the heretic! He is here to deceive you. Trust me folks. I was probed by these aliens several summers ago after 2and 1/2  bottles of Cuervo. They are real and they are coming for you. You must prepare yourselves for the end of days. And probing. They really, really like probing.


You said probing twice...
 
2013-12-29 03:45:37 PM  

NewportBarGuy: I was probed by these aliens several summers ago after 2and 1/2 bottles of Cuervo.


'Sokay, bro. Sometimes you start fooling around with one of the empties and things get out of hand. You can admit it, you're among friends.
 
2013-12-29 03:45:58 PM  
[wtfamireading.jpg]
 
2013-12-29 03:46:08 PM  
So what was it?
 
2013-12-29 03:46:51 PM  
FTA -- "UFO Sightings Daily is coordinated by Scott C. Waring who had been affiliated with the United States Air Force at SAC base and is currently an ESL teacher and UFOlogist who lives in Taiwan."

Worked the second shift in the base cafeteria at Eglin AFB, most likely.
 
2013-12-29 03:47:44 PM  
It *IS* a UFO.

An unidentified  felsic object.
 
2013-12-29 03:48:42 PM  
Whoo, boy, that site is chock full of fun stuff. Like this one here.
 
2013-12-29 03:49:05 PM  
not sure if serious or idiots
 
2013-12-29 03:49:18 PM  

Prey4reign: Worked the second shift in the base cafeteria at Eglin AFB, most likely.


I was thinking maybe he cleaned out the oil sumps at the motor pool.
 
2013-12-29 03:50:34 PM  
I called aliens the first week.
 
2013-12-29 03:50:55 PM  
 
2013-12-29 03:51:49 PM  

twistedmetal: It's a UFB.

/unidentified farking boulder



Wait, are you claiming a boulder is under the ground? Oh, I suppose someone dug a big hole and buried a boulder they just happened to have lying around, or maybe the boulder fairies placed it there. How gullible do you think I am?
 
2013-12-29 03:52:28 PM  

Uchiha_Cycliste: not sure if serious or idiots


[whynotboth.jpg]
 
2013-12-29 03:52:34 PM  
What about Large Marge?

survivingboystown.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-12-29 03:53:24 PM  
Yes, Canada has religious wackadoodles too.
 
2013-12-29 03:53:27 PM  
The chevrons are locking!
 
2013-12-29 03:54:03 PM  
Judging by the big headline banner on that page... Religion is a mental disease and there are medications to help the sites owner/writer get some help to restore reality.

/Sleestaks hate the cold of Seattle, but they do enjoy the moisture for their breeding programs.
 
2013-12-29 03:54:14 PM  
December 2013. A day that will live in anonimity.
 
2013-12-29 03:54:37 PM  

That's why if you please. I am on my bended knees. Bertha don't you come around here anymore.


 cdn1.bigcommerce.com

♪♫ I had a hard-on, runnin' from your window.  ♪♫

 
2013-12-29 03:55:48 PM  
December 24, 2013: A day that will live in infancy.
 
2013-12-29 03:55:53 PM  
It's a deep one stuck in the muck. Try not to wake it.
 
2013-12-29 03:56:17 PM  

MFAWG: I called aliens the first week.


Did aliens call back?
 
2013-12-29 03:57:06 PM  
"Project manager Chris Dixon, did not expect that this colossal machine would hit anything with the depth of the digging they were already at."

That there is some fine writin'.
 
2013-12-29 03:57:12 PM  
onevideogamersview.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-12-29 03:58:50 PM  

djcunix: It *IS* a UFO.

An unidentified  felsic object.


It's clearly  mafic.  You and your crazy theories.
 
2013-12-29 03:59:09 PM  
They're designed to roughly crumble stone and scoop up muck. If there's some steel, like a railroad track or some sort of rebar filled pile from the past that's been forgotten it could tangle up and be uncuttable but rock breakers.

Besides, it's glacial deposits. If it was a spaceship someone would have found it in the past century. It has not been there longer than the last ice age, 10k years or so.
 
2013-12-29 03:59:52 PM  
Um... it's only 60 feet down. The story and the comments make it sound like they are near the center of the Earth.

Also, what kind of boring (no pun intended) aliens would set up a base 60 feet under Seattle?
 
2013-12-29 04:00:16 PM  

Relatively Obscure: Well, at least it wasn't boring.


Well played, sir!
 
2013-12-29 04:00:59 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2013-12-29 04:02:28 PM  
ts1.mm.bing.net

I say they must have hit a casino. And were they using the machine from the French side or the English? I can never remember.
 
2013-12-29 04:03:36 PM  

Bolo Jungle: Um... it's only 60 feet down. The story and the comments make it sound like they are near the center of the Earth.

Also, what kind of boring (no pun intended) aliens would set up a base 60 feet under Seattle?


Very damp ones, I would imagine.
 
2013-12-29 04:03:47 PM  

Cybernetic: The chevrons are locking!


How many damn gates did they need? This makes what? Three? Or is it four?
 
2013-12-29 04:04:16 PM  
"Many speculated that Big Bertha could have hit the side walls of one of the many alien bases on Earth"

What a lot of weird euphemisms for sex.

/DRTFA
 
2013-12-29 04:04:51 PM  

twistedmetal: It's a UFB.

/unidentified farking boulder


Lisa, I would like to buy your boulder.
 
2013-12-29 04:05:33 PM  
I love when I click on one of these articles and it's about my own neck of the woods.
 
2013-12-29 04:08:01 PM  
Am I the only one who saw the video image and thought Lily Tomlin got a job in journalism?
 
2013-12-29 04:13:04 PM  

wiwille: Am I the only one who saw the video image and thought Lily Tomlin got a job in journalism?


Nope. Me, too. We sound old.
 
2013-12-29 04:13:56 PM  
I don't know why someone would bury a streetlight.
 
2013-12-29 04:14:19 PM  

whidbey: I love when I click on one of these articles and it's about my own neck of the woods.


You mean... Earth?
 
2013-12-29 04:14:59 PM  
What else would you expect her to find?

www.estesrockets.com
 
2013-12-29 04:22:03 PM  
Just get that damn thing off my porch already.
 
2013-12-29 04:26:18 PM  
Tenner says they tie a rope around some guy's waist and send him to investigate armed with nothing but a lamp. Muffled screams followed by radio silence and when they pull the rope back up there's nothing on the end but a leg and half a torso. 

Seen it all before.
 
2013-12-29 04:26:25 PM  
the whole part about 'tunneling through glacial deposits' is a rather big farking clue, one they passed right over in the rush to find aliens.
ngm.nationalgeographic.com

glaciers do tend to move move rather stupendously large boulders fairly outrageous distances, then recede and drop them right where they least belong.
 
2013-12-29 04:26:39 PM  
It's one of Paul Bunyan's buried gallstones.
 
2013-12-29 04:27:34 PM  
Did they get a Building Permit for that alien base?
 
2013-12-29 04:27:57 PM  
I think I have found the connection!

images.gibson.com
 
2013-12-29 04:30:52 PM  
Maybe it's the last boring machine that tried to dig through all that silt.
 
2013-12-29 04:32:34 PM  

Dahnkster: That's why if you please. I am on my bended knees. Bertha don't you come around here anymore.
 [cdn1.bigcommerce.com image 850x583]♪♫ I had a hard-on, runnin' from your window.  ♪♫


Wow. I just farkied you out of Grateful Dead love. I have that exact image hanging as a tapestry in my computer room.
 
2013-12-29 04:33:34 PM  

Ivan the Tolerable: the whole part about 'tunneling through glacial deposits' is a rather big farking clue, one they passed right over in the rush to find aliens.
[ngm.nationalgeographic.com image 670x447]

glaciers do tend to move move rather stupendously large boulders fairly outrageous distances, then recede and drop them right where they least belong.




What's amazing about that is how the glacier did not destroy the roadway where it deposited the boulder.
 
2013-12-29 04:33:42 PM  
all of you are wrong its one of Chuck Norris giant balls. I mean he has to keep them somewhere.
 
2013-12-29 04:36:17 PM  
The Wedgewood Erratic's big brother?
 
2013-12-29 04:37:08 PM  

Ivan the Tolerable: the whole part about 'tunneling through glacial deposits' is a rather big farking clue, one they passed right over in the rush to find aliens.
[ngm.nationalgeographic.com image 670x447]

glaciers do tend to move move rather stupendously large boulders fairly outrageous distances, then recede and drop them right where they least belong.


That is an awesome pebble right there! Too big to move efficiently? Just build the road around it! I like their problem solving process, simple, effective and elegant!
 
2013-12-29 04:39:34 PM  
Am I the only one who thought,  "Total Annihilation thread?"
 
2013-12-29 04:42:08 PM  
www.thescifishow.com

I guess we'll never know, will we.
Thanks Fox.
 
2013-12-29 04:43:30 PM  
I say it is Bigfoot's underground lair. He is nocturnal and sleeps there during the day.
 
2013-12-29 04:46:04 PM  

jake_lex: They may be on to something.  Here's a pic of me and some of my buddies on the dig standing in front of it:

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 842x401]

Why are we dressed like that?  Hey, it's Seattle, it rains a lot.


Nicely done on the aliens/Kubrick/moon crossover reference.
 
2013-12-29 04:47:22 PM  

twistedmetal: It's a UFB.

/unidentified farking boulder


+1
 
2013-12-29 05:02:37 PM  

DarkSoulNoHope: What about Large Marge?

[survivingboystown.files.wordpress.com image 450x204]

Came for this reference, leaving satisfied :)

 
2013-12-29 05:15:04 PM  

illannoyin: I think I have found the connection!

[images.gibson.com image 300x300]



Finally!  Someone else gets it!  The first thing I thought of.  Bertha Butt and the Butt Sistas!

/p-funk
//uncut
///tha' bomb
 
2013-12-29 05:23:42 PM  
Mother Nature left a hell of a mess north of Salina, Kansas. Probably did in Seattle, too.

encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com
 
2013-12-29 05:33:18 PM  
Big Bertha has no forward looking window and cannot back up. Maybe we'll just leave it there for the next Big Bertha.

Big Bertha can't back up
 
2013-12-29 05:33:48 PM  

iheartscotch: SurfaceTension: Cue the birds nest hair "I'm not saying it's aliens" guy

Apparently, crazy hair guy owns a couple of dispensaries. Me thinks that someone is sampling their own product ..


Ahaahahah if that's farking true then that's amazing. He gets to smoke weed all day and talk about dumbshiat on tv. Perfect job.
 
2013-12-29 05:37:25 PM  
Manning should just hit the showers with a minute to go in the half
 
2013-12-29 05:45:15 PM  

zerkalo: Manning should just hit the showers with a minute to go in the half


Ah, the old non sequitur
 
2013-12-29 05:56:28 PM  
ok  ...
the "F"
in UFO...
yes,  last time I checked, it stood for flying,  as in
air...
high up above ground...
altitude...
moving fast...
hovering...
cloaking devise with bright flashing lights switched on an all...

are they digging tunnels through clean air now,  or am I just missing it completely here...

Sorry ...  just had to... :)
 
2013-12-29 06:00:21 PM  
Ivan The Tolerable:

I have drunk beer on top of that rock. Peed off it as well. Not me in the picture, though
 
2013-12-29 06:12:14 PM  
lh6.googleusercontent.com
That's where they're coming in, along the Oregon coast.......

/battle beneath obscurity???
 
2013-12-29 06:27:27 PM  

3rotor: ok  ...
the "F"
in UFO...
yes,  last time I checked, it stood for flying,  as in
air...
high up above ground...
altitude...
moving fast...
hovering...
cloaking devise with bright flashing lights switched on an all...

are they digging tunnels through clean air now,  or am I just missing it completely here...

Sorry ...  just had to... :)


I guess you have forgotten about 'Quatermass and the Pit' ?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quatermass_and_the_Pit_(film)


3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-12-29 06:37:06 PM  

Ivan the Tolerable: the whole part about 'tunneling through glacial deposits' is a rather big farking clue, one they passed right over in the rush to find aliens.
[ngm.nationalgeographic.com image 670x447]

glaciers do tend to move move rather stupendously large boulders fairly outrageous distances, then recede and drop them right where they least belong.


That would have to be a heckuva anomaly.

/hey I can smell fresh air down there
//and breakfast
 
2013-12-29 07:16:18 PM  
Not impressed:

www.smbhq.com
 
2013-12-29 07:18:49 PM  

edgar1981: Tenner says they tie a rope around some guy's waist and send him to investigate armed with nothing but a lamp. Muffled screams followed by radio silence and when they pull the rope back up there's nothing on the end but a leg and half a torso.

Seen it all before.


And then the radio crackles to life one last time: "You fool! Warren is dead!"
 
2013-12-29 07:19:37 PM  

Summoner101: Not impressed:

[www.smbhq.com image 352x240]


Impressed:

www.x-entertainment.com
 
2013-12-29 07:24:19 PM  

Ivan the Tolerable: the whole part about 'tunneling through glacial deposits' is a rather big farking clue, one they passed right over in the rush to find aliens.
[ngm.nationalgeographic.com image 670x447]

glaciers do tend to move move rather stupendously large boulders fairly outrageous distances, then recede and drop them right where they least belong.


No farking way thats Seattle, they know how to use a traffic circle...
 
2013-12-29 07:48:56 PM  

Snarfangel: Wait, are you claiming a boulder is under the ground? Oh, I suppose someone dug a big hole and buried a boulder they just happened to have lying around, or maybe the boulder fairies placed it there. How gullible do you think I am?


It's an alien boulder, so it was placed there by aliens. Christ, how stupid do you have to be to believe in fairies?
 
2013-12-29 08:44:13 PM  
Let me at it. I got five kids to feed!
 
2013-12-29 08:44:33 PM  

whidbey: Ivan the Tolerable: the whole part about 'tunneling through glacial deposits' is a rather big farking clue, one they passed right over in the rush to find aliens.
[ngm.nationalgeographic.com image 670x447]

glaciers do tend to move move rather stupendously large boulders fairly outrageous distances, then recede and drop them right where they least belong.

That would have to be a heckuva anomaly.


True, but which is more likely to find in glacial deposit; glacial boulder or alien headquarters?
 
2013-12-29 08:53:16 PM  

OK So Amuse Me: Ivan the Tolerable: the whole part about 'tunneling through glacial deposits' is a rather big farking clue, one they passed right over in the rush to find aliens.
[ngm.nationalgeographic.com image 670x447]

glaciers do tend to move move rather stupendously large boulders fairly outrageous distances, then recede and drop them right where they least belong.

That is an awesome pebble right there! Too big to move efficiently? Just build the road around it! I like their problem solving process, simple, effective and elegant!


I worked in a restaurant that was built around one of those. It made up a wall of the basement, and kept the wine cellar at the perfect temperature.

It was very cool.
 
2013-12-29 10:28:29 PM  
i0.kym-cdn.com
 
2013-12-29 10:39:34 PM  

jojostan: [lh6.googleusercontent.com image 640x352]
That's where they're coming in, along the Oregon coast.......

/battle beneath obscurity???



merryfrolics.files.wordpress.com
Sgt Yellowhat: "Sir! Our sensor outposts have detected a lame attempt at obscurity!"
General Blackhat: "Fools! They do not realize how many B-Movie fanatics are part of the Farkistan Army!"

/Even made it too easy with the title search
//Battle Beneath The Earth 1967
///I own it, along with several thousand other SciFi & Horror titles - the cheesier, the better
 
2013-12-29 11:13:11 PM  

genner: djcunix: It *IS* a UFO.

An unidentified  felsic object.

It's clearly  mafic.  You and your crazy theories.


Albite. What is really graben Big Bertha?
 
2013-12-29 11:47:22 PM  
4.bp.blogspot.com
No one yet?
 
2013-12-29 11:58:39 PM  
Boring Machines can drill thru Hard Rock and a boulder would be no problem, hence the mystery.
 
2013-12-30 12:41:33 AM  
i.imgur.com

Wanted for questioning...
 
2013-12-30 12:46:17 AM  
"Many are off their meds."
 
2013-12-30 12:23:03 PM  

Bolo Jungle: Um... it's only 60 feet down. The story and the comments make it sound like they are near the center of the Earth.

Also, what kind of boring (no pun intended) aliens would set up a base 60 feet under Seattle?


Aliens from the planet Starbucks, maybe?
 
2013-12-30 12:54:15 PM  

SurfaceTension: Cue the birds nest hair "I'm not saying it's aliens" guy


i52.photobucket.com
 
2013-12-30 04:26:31 PM  
Alright alright alright.

cincinnati.com

HC SVNT DRACONES
 
2013-12-30 06:18:46 PM  
Beware the Tommy-knockers.

/These guys are already Becoming.
 
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