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(Deadspin)   Deadspin tackles one of the most contentious issues in food circles: what exactly IS the 'proper' way to eat raw oysters   (deadspin.com) divider line 138
    More: Interesting, tackles, common mistake  
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4105 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Dec 2013 at 10:55 AM (15 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



138 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-12-29 09:41:40 AM
Dash of Tabasco and down the hatch. Rinse and repeat.
 
2013-12-29 10:00:31 AM
Lift.  Slurp.  Repeat until all oysters are consumed.  Wipe hands on pants.
 
2013-12-29 10:36:22 AM

NewportBarGuy: Dash of Tabasco and down the hatch. Rinse and repeat.


Do yourself a favor: find Crystal hot sauce. It's less vinegary and is absolutely perfect for raw oysters.
 
2013-12-29 10:56:50 AM
Open shell, get disgusted, throw directly in trash.
 
2013-12-29 10:56:56 AM
squirt of lemon
 
2013-12-29 10:58:05 AM
Screw up your face first, Gag while eating them. Throw up shortly afterwards.
 
2013-12-29 10:58:10 AM
Oyster + house radish.

Or oyster + vodka + hotsauce.

Goddamn I want some raw oysters.

Also, my autocorrect really wants "oyster" to be "it's wet." I think my autocorrect has been drinking.
 
2013-12-29 10:58:28 AM
Best way. Don't eat them .
 
2013-12-29 10:58:54 AM
A bit of horseradish, a squirt of lemon, and slurp.
 
2013-12-29 10:59:06 AM
House radish?

Really?
 
2013-12-29 11:00:09 AM
I have never eaten raw oysters and I never, ever will.  The thought of it is absolutely disgusting.
 
2013-12-29 11:00:55 AM
Umm easy subs: Schuck'em an Chuck'em

rawesomebar.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-12-29 11:01:02 AM

Revenge of the Muttonstache: Open shell, get disgusted, throw directly in trash.


Skip the first two steps for those into the whole brevity thing
 
2013-12-29 11:01:20 AM
Now I'm craving oysters.

But the family is meeting up at a sports bar for lunch.

This is bullsh*t. Someone post something to make me crave wings instead, stat.
 
2013-12-29 11:01:45 AM
With beer
 
2013-12-29 11:02:20 AM

TinyFist: Now I'm craving oysters.

But the family is meeting up at a sports bar for lunch.

This is bullsh*t. Someone post something to make me crave wings instead, stat.


You know what would be a great lunch?

A dozen oysters and a dozen wings. And beer.
 
2013-12-29 11:02:25 AM
Trick question. There is more than one correct answer.
 
2013-12-29 11:03:12 AM
Smoke them then eat them.
 
2013-12-29 11:03:15 AM
On a cracker with a little cocktail sauce. One bite.

Source: former professional oyster shucker
 
2013-12-29 11:03:25 AM
1) skip the oysters

2) Order sushi
 
2013-12-29 11:03:39 AM

AbiNormal: Smoke them then eat them.


This, too.
 
2013-12-29 11:04:01 AM
I really hate Foodspin.
 
2013-12-29 11:04:43 AM

SDRR: Trick question. There is more than one correct answer.


I'm so tired of the whole 'there is only one right way to do ____________'. Fark that shiat, let people do whatever they want.
 
2013-12-29 11:05:17 AM

megarian: TinyFist: 
You know what would be a great lunch?

A dozen oysters and a dozen wings. And beer.


As much as I enjoy this bar we go to, I am NOT eating oysters from there.

There will be beer.
 
2013-12-29 11:05:45 AM

notyomama: I have never eaten raw oysters and I never, ever will.  The thought of it is absolutely disgusting.


i dont want them raw, but steamed medium or well is good. or fried. or in stew. mmmm
 
2013-12-29 11:05:51 AM
Replace with pork rind.
 
2013-12-29 11:06:04 AM
I can settle this. I down a few dozen a week at Harbor Seafood in Kenner, La.

Cocktail sauce with horseradish and Tabasco, with a squeeze of lemon. Stir that up in a small bowl to dip raw oysters. Eat oysters with a cracker and an Abita Amber beer.

If you have never been to this hole in a wall place to eat seafood, put it on your list of places to eat while in the Greater New Orleans Metro area.
 
2013-12-29 11:07:39 AM
If you must put something on an oyster, mignonette is the way to go.
 
2013-12-29 11:07:47 AM
Is this the same douchebag who wrote the article over thanksgiving about making mashed potatoes? The one where it took 4000 words to give 3 tips? Yeah. Seems like it.
 
2013-12-29 11:08:39 AM

yagottabefarkinkiddinme: I can settle this. I down a few dozen a week at Harbor Seafood in Kenner, La.

Cocktail sauce with horseradish and Tabasco, with a squeeze of lemon. Stir that up in a small bowl to dip raw oysters. Eat oysters with a cracker and an Abita Amber beer.

If you have never been to this hole in a wall place to eat seafood, put it on your list of places to eat while in the Greater New Orleans Metro area.


I second this endorsement. That said, I was at Redfish Grille last night, and the raw oysters were perfect Ralph Brennan must be in really good with the local distributors because they are always good there. Cooter Brown's uptown has consistently good raw oysters, too. And over 100 varieties of beer.
 
2013-12-29 11:09:10 AM

INeedAName: SDRR: Trick question. There is more than one correct answer.

I'm so tired of the whole 'there is only one right way to do ____________'. Fark that shiat, let people do whatever they want.


That's not the right way to discuss things on the Internet.
 
2013-12-29 11:09:48 AM
Steamed, on crackers with redbull hotsauce (or texas pete)

/miss my fav place in cocoa beach named shuckleberry fins, dozen oysters and wings cost $8 and beer on top was cold as ice :(
 
2013-12-29 11:12:00 AM
I read that as Deadpool at first...was disappointed...

/lil lemon, hot sauce, horseradish all mixed up
 
2013-12-29 11:14:14 AM
Never. That is the correct way to eat oysters.
 
2013-12-29 11:14:41 AM
1) Deep fry them first

2) Hot cocktail sauce, apply liberally
 
2013-12-29 11:15:04 AM
step 1. Stuff them in your pie-hole.
 
2013-12-29 11:15:05 AM
Marine biologists do not eat oysters, I hear.

They know where they've been and what they've been doing.

I don't mind them smoked though, wrapped in bacon. You know what else is good wrapped in bacon (besides everything)? Sweet potatoes. Cut them into bite-sized pieces, boil or bake them, wrap in bacon and boil and they are so delicious you hardly miss the oyster.
 
2013-12-29 11:15:52 AM
People that I know that like eating oysters also like boiled Okra. It must be a slime thing.
 
2013-12-29 11:15:57 AM
The best oysters on the West Coast are from Humboldt Bay. They're larger and more flavorful, because the bay has no freshwater , and receives a complete refreshment of nutrients every tidal cycle. You can get them fresh out of the water at either the Eureka or Arcata farmer's markets. Highly recommended. I don't know what they go for now, but a decade ago, they were $5 a dozen.
 
2013-12-29 11:17:07 AM
Ever notice how a woman will expect you to go down on her until SHE's finished, but then won't have the decency to reciprocate?
 
2013-12-29 11:17:54 AM

sparkeyjames: People that I know that like eating oysters also like boiled Okra. It must be a slime thing.


Love raw oysters, hate boiled okra - so much for that theory
 
2013-12-29 11:19:02 AM
wheresthedrama.files.wordpress.com

Slurp.
 
2013-12-29 11:19:25 AM

notyomama: I have never eaten raw oysters and I never, ever will.  The thought of it is absolutely disgusting.


That's fine, no one's ever forced you to eat one, have they?

More for the rest of us.
 
2013-12-29 11:20:34 AM
Former MD'er now NC'er here - I love oysters. I used to just eat them raw (with a bit of Texas Pete) but I've now started to really, really like them steamed. Take your fork, dip 'em melted butter & sprinkle with some black pepper. Too damned good.

/Thank you oyster haters - more for me.
 
2013-12-29 11:21:05 AM

Nabb1: yagottabefarkinkiddinme: I can settle this. I down a few dozen a week at Harbor Seafood in Kenner, La.

Cocktail sauce with horseradish and Tabasco, with a squeeze of lemon. Stir that up in a small bowl to dip raw oysters. Eat oysters with a cracker and an Abita Amber beer.

If you have never been to this hole in a wall place to eat seafood, put it on your list of places to eat while in the Greater New Orleans Metro area.

I second this endorsement. That said, I was at Redfish Grille last night, and the raw oysters were perfect Ralph Brennan must be in really good with the local distributors because they are always good there. Cooter Brown's uptown has consistently good raw oysters, too. And over 100 varieties of beer.


Hahahaha, anyone in New Orleans from the Brennan family has the distributors at their beck and call.
 
2013-12-29 11:22:49 AM
yagottabefarkinkiddinme: Monday and Tuesday $6.00 a dozen at Harbor.
 
2013-12-29 11:23:53 AM
Courage is eating the second oyster.
 
2013-12-29 11:23:55 AM
Skip the oyster knife, open them with a churchkey-style can opener. Google it for instructions, save yourself from mortal wounds.
 
2013-12-29 11:23:56 AM
1.) Crack open
2.) Slup it down
3.) Die from allergic reaction
 
2013-12-29 11:25:36 AM

notyomama: I have never eaten raw oysters and I never, ever will.  The thought of it is absolutely disgusting.


Growing up in the Midwest, I always felt this way about a lot of seafood.

As an adult in the northeast, I regret growing up landlocked and missing out on fresh oysters. One of the best things there is, and part of my last meal when they finally come to give me the electric chair.
 
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