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(Daily Mail)   Introducing "The Good Night" ring that claims it is guaranteed to stop snoring, not to be confused with the wedding ring which is guaranteed to stop sex   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 42
    More: Interesting, clinical research  
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6491 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Dec 2013 at 2:28 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



42 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-12-19 02:14:18 PM  
Bullshiat.

There, I saved you $50.
 
2013-12-19 02:23:38 PM  
I want to buy their rock.
 
2013-12-19 02:30:35 PM  
I think the bracelets like this are great. They help me identify morons at a diatance.
 
2013-12-19 02:31:09 PM  
It only stop sex with the wife, subby. Everything else is fair game.
 
2013-12-19 02:33:12 PM  
What's next? A sta-hard ring for your weener?
My pinkie is just fine, thank you.
 
2013-12-19 02:34:56 PM  
I know someone who had surgery on his sinus passages as a means of treating severe sleep apnea. He does not snore any more.

Unfortunately, he does not snore any less, either.
 
2013-12-19 02:34:57 PM  

encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com

 
2013-12-19 02:35:51 PM  
Instructions: Slip ring on finger, make fist, use ring hand to punch snorer in mouth.
 
2013-12-19 02:36:23 PM  

Dimensio: I know someone who had surgery on his sinus passages as a means of treating severe sleep apnea. He does not snore any more.

Unfortunately, he does not snore any less, either.


Bravo!
 
2013-12-19 02:36:24 PM  
So says study conducted by company that exists entirely to "substantiate" those sort of claims.
 
2013-12-19 02:36:35 PM  
shennanigins.
 
2013-12-19 02:38:06 PM  
So now Fark is shilling scam products?

/stop snoring with this one trick
//stop snoring secrets they don't want you to know
 
2013-12-19 02:38:30 PM  
Hey, I believe them! I just bought one and put it on, and I haven't snored yet! So there!
 
2013-12-19 02:59:21 PM  

Dimensio: I know someone who had surgery on his sinus passages as a means of treating severe sleep apnea. He does not snore any more.

Unfortunately, he does not snore any less, either.


I also know a gent who got a 50k surgery for his sleep apnea, paid out of pocket.  He no longer has sleep apnea, so the snoring sound isn't the air going out vibrating his nasal passages and making rather odd noises, when it doesn't sound like snoring.  Now he just makes normal snoring noises....  very loudly.

Ex-gf didn't have sleep apnea, she was just a big girl(little bigger than I normally like, but pleasantly plump, all the same).  Convinced herself she did have the apnea, and went on a woe is me rant whenever anyone brought it up.  Tried to work with her on losing weight, using the "we'll be together longer if you lose weight" argument, and the "type 2 diabet-us is going to severely impact our lives" argument.  Didn't work well.  She went on the celery diet, atkins, juice diet.  Worst thing was that whenever she did these diets, I'd have to sneak in extra meals(I'm naturally skinny), because I'd be pulled into the diet.  2 weeks of whatever and she'd admit defeat and go on a food binge, and this woman can bake.  2 more weeks and the next diet would start.  Her weight never went down, and her snoring only ever got worse.  If I'd have had my current phone, I'd have recorded the night that drove me to the brink; I was in the next room, sleeping on the couch, which had become our after-sex arrangement, and I still couldn't sleep due to the noise. With earplugs.  The bedroom door closed.

The bedroom door was vibrating on its hinges.

Dumped her the next day.  Should have waited one more day and gotten video of it, but sleep deprivation was driving me crazy.

/whenever I think of calling her up and working on things, all I have to do is think about the never-ending string of diets, and the vibrating door
//she was crazy amazing in the sack, though
 
2013-12-19 03:10:26 PM  
I have one just like it that keeps tigers away.
 
2013-12-19 03:17:42 PM  

Snort: I have one just like it that keeps tigers away.


OK, so have you been attacked by tigers since you got it?
 
2013-12-19 03:21:23 PM  
Marriage ends sex? Ummm, no. After my husband and I got married that part increased waaaaay more...for 22 years we never got tired of each other. Rest in peace honey.

With that said, I'm sure that snoring thing is BS...
 
2013-12-19 03:24:02 PM  
You guys doubting this makes me laugh.  They guy that invented it played saxophone on Bend Me, Shake Me, and you really think it doesn't work?  Idiots.
 
2013-12-19 03:25:02 PM  

Crass and Jaded Mother Farker: Snort: I have one just like it that keeps tigers away.

OK, so have you been attacked by tigers since you got it?


I have suffered 0 tiger attacks.  In fact, since I have had it, I have not seen any tigers!  It is 100% completely effective!  Definitely worth the money.
 
2013-12-19 03:27:01 PM  

abhorrent1: So now Fark is shilling scam products?

/stop snoring with this one trick
//stop snoring secrets they don't want you to know


Discovered by a MOM in your area!
 
2013-12-19 03:32:49 PM  
It probably costs them about 50 cents per ring so that's a pretty sweet markup. They only have a sell a few for it to make good money. Genius!
 
2013-12-19 03:36:29 PM  

Snort: Crass and Jaded Mother Farker: Snort: I have one just like it that keeps tigers away.

OK, so have you been attacked by tigers since you got it?

I have suffered 0 tiger attacks.  In fact, since I have had it, I have not seen any tigers!  It is 100% completely effective!  Definitely worth the money.


In that case you should definitely buy the snoring ring. I bet the tigers would really appreciate it when they stop snoring.

/Last night I shot an elephant in my pajamas.
//How it got in my pajamas I'll never know.
 
2013-12-19 03:45:42 PM  
$50 for something that

a) doesn't work, and
b) you could make in your garage using a pair of pliers and some scrap metal.
 
2013-12-19 03:56:30 PM  
Spend the $50 on blow and you won't snore... for a little while anyway.

/just add hookers
 
2013-12-19 03:57:35 PM  
You had me going there until I looked at the article and saw that the ring goes on your finger and not in your nose. It must be one of those magic rings.

But that is fixable.

Here's what you do:  buy the snorer a nose ring and piercing for the septum of their nose. Add a chain. When the snorer snores, pull the chain until they stop. If the problem is open mouth snoring, put a ring in the upper lip and a catch (a double ball and chain arrangement might work) in the lower lip and shut their mouth.

Snoring is caused by the vibration of soft tissue in the air passages. I don't see how pressure on your finger (or acupuncture, or Qi or any of that quasi- or pseudo- scientific crap, would stop that vibration. Maybe a bit of a placebo effect--you might sleep better if you thought the snoring was going to stop.

But I think my suggestions are better: use body jewelry to shut the snorer up. If that doesn't work, the old smothering-them-with-a-pillow technique is a sure fire way to stop snoring permanently. Until you find that your cell mate snores or you find him or her pressing a pillow into your face. By then, though, it's too late.

Because let's face it. Nobody realizes that they snore until they wake themselves up one night while they are sleeping alone.
 
2013-12-19 03:58:48 PM  
How about something that more likely works? I highly recommended:

img.fark.net
 
2013-12-19 04:03:40 PM  

abhorrent1: So now Fark is shilling scam products?

/stop snoring with this one trick
//stop snoring secrets they don't want you to know


Why do you think comments are disabled on the Sponsored Links?
 
2013-12-19 04:04:48 PM  

bentley57: How about something that more likely works? I highly recommended:

[img.fark.net image 400x400]


That does zero for me.  The only thing that stops me from snoring is my wife's elbow.  I snore loud and long and from the minute I fall asleep.  I'm not fat, don't have apnea, and don't drink anymore.  I really don't know what the problem is or how to stop it.  I'm almost desperate enough to try  $50 pinkie ring.
 
2013-12-19 04:16:56 PM  

Three Crooked Squirrels: bentley57: How about something that more likely works? I highly recommended:

[img.fark.net image 400x400]

That does zero for me.  The only thing that stops me from snoring is my wife's elbow.  I snore loud and long and from the minute I fall asleep.  I'm not fat, don't have apnea, and don't drink anymore.  I really don't know what the problem is or how to stop it.  I'm almost desperate enough to try  $50 pinkie ring.


Try a sleep disorder clinic.  Might be worth the visit.
 
2013-12-19 04:34:39 PM  

Three Crooked Squirrels: bentley57: How about something that more likely works? I highly recommended:

[img.fark.net image 400x400]

That does zero for me.  The only thing that stops me from snoring is my wife's elbow.  I snore loud and long and from the minute I fall asleep.  I'm not fat, don't have apnea, and don't drink anymore.  I really don't know what the problem is or how to stop it.  I'm almost desperate enough to try  $50 pinkie ring.


are you sleeping on your side or your back?  Switch to side.  Invest in good pillows.
 
2013-12-19 04:55:07 PM  
I have used mouthpieces that significantly reduce my snoring. They are about $30 and are essentially a sports mouthguard that you shape so it holds your lower jaw a little more forward while you sleep. I got used to it pretty quickly. They don't last forever so you do need to keep buying them, but they are effective and I found that I feel more rested in the morning when I use them. Unfortunately, I have also found that the mouthguard also significantly reduces sexy time as, according to my wife, it makes me look mongoloid.
 
2013-12-19 04:58:58 PM  

bentley57: How about something that more likely works? I highly recommended:

[img.fark.net image 400x400]


Yeah, no.  That's not why people snore.

Buttknuckle: Three Crooked Squirrels: bentley57: How about something that more likely works? I highly recommended:

[img.fark.net image 400x400]

That does zero for me.  The only thing that stops me from snoring is my wife's elbow.  I snore loud and long and from the minute I fall asleep.  I'm not fat, don't have apnea, and don't drink anymore.  I really don't know what the problem is or how to stop it.  I'm almost desperate enough to try  $50 pinkie ring.

Try a sleep disorder clinic.  Might be worth the visit.


Seconded.  While I do have sleep apnea, the side benefit of CPAP therapy is that my nightly volume instantly went from chainsaw to stealth dust buster.  It probably saved my marriage.

And CPAP is so simple-  No surgery, no drugs, no mouthpiece, no sticky thing on your nose- it doesn't do anything other than provide enough positive pressure to keep your uvula from blocking the airway.  100% effective, all the time.  Snoring is the same process, just without the complete blockage.

The other side benefit is that you now have a sleep snorkel.  Wanna bury under a pile of blankets?  Sandwich your head between two pillows?  Get your air intake down at floor level and across the room because your wife has McDonalds farts and is unintentionally giving you the dutch oven?  No problem.
 
2013-12-19 05:16:38 PM  

unyon: bentley57: How about something that more likely works? I highly recommended:

[img.fark.net image 400x400]

Yeah, no.  That's not why people snore.

Buttknuckle: Three Crooked Squirrels: bentley57: How about something that more likely works? I highly recommended:

[img.fark.net image 400x400]

That does zero for me.  The only thing that stops me from snoring is my wife's elbow.  I snore loud and long and from the minute I fall asleep.  I'm not fat, don't have apnea, and don't drink anymore.  I really don't know what the problem is or how to stop it.  I'm almost desperate enough to try  $50 pinkie ring.

Try a sleep disorder clinic.  Might be worth the visit.

Seconded.  While I do have sleep apnea, the side benefit of CPAP therapy is that my nightly volume instantly went from chainsaw to stealth dust buster.  It probably saved my marriage.

And CPAP is so simple-  No surgery, no drugs, no mouthpiece, no sticky thing on your nose- it doesn't do anything other than provide enough positive pressure to keep your uvula from blocking the airway.  100% effective, all the time.  Snoring is the same process, just without the complete blockage.

The other side benefit is that you now have a sleep snorkel.  Wanna bury under a pile of blankets?  Sandwich your head between two pillows?  Get your air intake down at floor level and across the room because your wife has McDonalds farts and is unintentionally giving you the dutch oven?  No problem.


Thirded. The CPAP is the way to go. It will take a week or two to get used to, but the snoring and apnea is gone. after a couple years now it is my sleep signal. I'm usually asleep within a minute of putting it on. The only downside is it makes it tougher to spoon with my wife. I wish they would make a mask that vents up the hose more effectively than the ones I have tried.
 
2013-12-19 05:30:16 PM  

Three Crooked Squirrels: bentley57: How about something that more likely works? I highly recommended:

[img.fark.net image 400x400]

That does zero for me.  The only thing that stops me from snoring is my wife's elbow.  I snore loud and long and from the minute I fall asleep.  I'm not fat, don't have apnea, and don't drink anymore.  I really don't know what the problem is or how to stop it.  I'm almost desperate enough to try  $50 pinkie ring.


I've snored since I was a skinny kid, but it's gotten worse with age.

I stumbled upon at least part of my problem when I was researching the stupid constant rhinitis thing I have going (my grandmother and mom had it too, I think). I have a deviated septum, which I never knew was a thing - asked at the doctor's office about it and had it confirmed since my nose is slightly crooked, but in a gradual way. Weight gain plus way too much stress and not enough sleep seems to have combined to an epic problem these days.

The breathe right strips work pretty well for me but it's not 100% even when combined with pseudoephedrine and a humidifier; depends on the night I guess.

I'm hoping to look into the surgery when we move but someone else here said it didn't work for them. There are nights I'm banished to the couch with a sleeping bag =/
 
2013-12-19 05:41:22 PM  

garumph: Thirded. The CPAP is the way to go. It will take a week or two to get used to, but the snoring and apnea is gone. after a couple years now it is my sleep signal. I'm usually asleep within a minute of putting it on. The only downside is it makes it tougher to spoon with my wife. I wish they would make a mask that vents up the hose more effectively than the ones I have tried.


I know exactly the issue that you're talking about.  I've tried several different mask configurations.  I've changed to using nasal pillow, not mask configurations for several years now.  They're less bulky, and most allow the hose to rotate so that even if the 'exhaust' velocity is high, it can be deflected either towards the head of the bed, or down along the wearers body.  This is helpful at snuggle time.  My wife senses when she hears me peel off the mask entirely that I'm likely going to invade her personal space.

FYI, I use the Resmed Swift LT, but they also make the Swift II, which actually is designed to exhaust away from both the user and bedmates.  I haven't tried it personally, though.
 
2013-12-19 06:08:15 PM  

unyon: garumph: Thirded. The CPAP is the way to go. It will take a week or two to get used to, but the snoring and apnea is gone. after a couple years now it is my sleep signal. I'm usually asleep within a minute of putting it on. The only downside is it makes it tougher to spoon with my wife. I wish they would make a mask that vents up the hose more effectively than the ones I have tried.

I know exactly the issue that you're talking about.  I've tried several different mask configurations.  I've changed to using nasal pillow, not mask configurations for several years now.  They're less bulky, and most allow the hose to rotate so that even if the 'exhaust' velocity is high, it can be deflected either towards the head of the bed, or down along the wearers body.  This is helpful at snuggle time.  My wife senses when she hears me peel off the mask entirely that I'm likely going to invade her personal space.

FYI, I use the Resmed Swift LT, but they also make the Swift II, which actually is designed to exhaust away from both the user and bedmates.  I haven't tried it personally, though.


I'm using the Swift LT also. It is definitely better than the one I had before, but still almost impossible to keep from blowing on your partner if you want to snuggle close. I'll have to check out the Swift II.
 
2013-12-19 07:17:41 PM  
Only thing I've found that helps.
Doesn't stop me snoring, but lasts long enough for
Mrs jamspoon to (mostly) get to sleep before I start
img.fark.net
 
2013-12-19 07:24:25 PM  
I've also recently found this article on singing to prevent snoring
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-23753524

Been trying it on my (lone) commute to work in the car. Jury is out regarding effectiveness, but may help.
 
2013-12-19 08:40:27 PM  
had anti snoring surgery. the work on the nasal passages was useless but the doctor also put in a stitch to tighten the soft palette and reduced the uvula, that helped.
 
2013-12-19 11:28:52 PM  

myworld: I have used mouthpieces that significantly reduce my snoring. They are about $30 and are essentially a sports mouthguard that you shape so it holds your lower jaw a little more forward while you sleep. I got used to it pretty quickly. They don't last forever so you do need to keep buying them, but they are effective and I found that I feel more rested in the morning when I use them. Unfortunately, I have also found that the mouthguard also significantly reduces sexy time as, according to my wife, it makes me look mongoloid.


If my husband found something to reduce the snoring, I would totally reward him with like twice the sexytimes. It is damned hard to feel interested in staying awake for nookie when I know I'm going to lose more sleep once he conks out. I'm making a shopping list from this thread.
 
2013-12-20 12:19:18 AM  
And if the wife is the Nightly Freight Train?   Whats sexy time?

/reduce to weekend mornings
//"McDonalds farts?"
 
2013-12-20 01:06:00 AM  

SecretAgentWoman: Bullshiat.

There, I saved you $50.


No, I believe wearing it would keep me from snoring - by being so damn annoying that I couldn't sleep.
 
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