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(USA Today)   It's that time of year again. How much should you tip the garbage man, the paper boy, the cleaning girls, the janitors at work, Concetta from the outcall massage parlor?   (usatoday.com) divider line 135
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3134 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Dec 2013 at 8:24 PM (31 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



135 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-12-18 07:42:16 PM
The what? I'm supposed to tip people? I don't even know those people.
 
2013-12-18 07:43:38 PM
11k a piece.
 
2013-12-18 07:44:48 PM
Tip a garbage man?
 
2013-12-18 07:45:17 PM
Do we have to do this every day?
 
2013-12-18 07:45:47 PM
A blowie
 
2013-12-18 07:48:50 PM
I'm not sure I have anyone that deserves a tip this year.
 
2013-12-18 07:49:25 PM

mitchcumstein1: Tip a garbage man?


We did this in Chicago.  Beer and money, and occasionally helping them hoist (not me, the SO).

The result:  they would take anything, even if there were an arm sticking out.  Our neighbors would put out similar stuff and it would never get taken.  Those guys remember that stuff.  A gift at the holidays can pay off throughout the year.
 
2013-12-18 07:51:27 PM
Growing up my dad tipped the garbage guys because it was a three man job - one driving the truck and two on the back manually lifting all the trash cans in all sorts of weather. Now the trash is picked up by one man sitting in the comfort of the cab with a robotic arm. No tip.
 
2013-12-18 07:52:32 PM
I bought the owner of my favorite bar a bottle of Woodford because he's a good friend and has given me plenty of free bourbon over the year.  I've been asking him to stock Woodford, so I thought if I got him some he might find he likes it as well.  Plus I know he'll just hide it behind the bar and drink it with me when I'm around, so it's really a gift that keeps giving back.
 
2013-12-18 07:52:36 PM
The only person I really tipped was my doorman in NYC but that's because he did a lot of stuff for me throughout the year.
 
2013-12-18 07:54:48 PM
How many times this year are we going to have this thread?
 
2013-12-18 07:55:01 PM
Mr. Pink is disappointed in all of you.
 
2013-12-18 07:55:04 PM

CommieTaoist: Growing up my dad tipped the garbage guys because it was a three man job - one driving the truck and two on the back manually lifting all the trash cans in all sorts of weather. Now the trash is picked up by one man sitting in the comfort of the cab with a robotic arm. No tip.


He sees your trash, tip him before he tells the neighbors about your "used" dakis.
 
2013-12-18 07:55:30 PM
I just moved into a new neighborhood and my garbage can had a Xmas card taped to it "from your garbage man, Bill (last name withheld to protect the clueless)."  My neighbor told me that was Bill's way of asking for a Xmas tip.  Now I find out Xmas tipping is like a tradition for a lot of people: the people listed in the headline; mail carrier; hair stylist; your kids' teachers, etc.  I'm inclined to not give Bill a brown penny because I haven't had him as "my personal garbage man" for all that long.  I'm accustomed to tipping waitresses and waiters and barbers and the guy who delivers the pizza but this puts a new wrinkle on life for me.
 
2013-12-18 07:56:28 PM
I'm tipping everyone in this thread with a handjob.

You heard me.
 
2013-12-18 07:56:58 PM

Rev.K: I'm tipping everyone in this thread with a handjob.

You heard me.


I'm out.
 
2013-12-18 07:57:33 PM

Prey4reign: I just moved into a new neighborhood and my garbage can had a Xmas card taped to it "from your garbage man, Bill (last name withheld to protect the clueless)."  My neighbor told me that was Bill's way of asking for a Xmas tip.  Now I find out Xmas tipping is like a tradition for a lot of people: the people listed in the headline; mail carrier; hair stylist; your kids' teachers, etc.  I'm inclined to not give Bill a brown penny because I haven't had him as "my personal garbage man" for all that long.  I'm accustomed to tipping waitresses and waiters and barbers and the guy who delivers the pizza but this puts a new wrinkle on life for me.


This tyranny, it's horrible. Actually he doesn't get jack either if it's from me in that situation.
 
2013-12-18 07:59:22 PM
Postman?  This week I have a certified letter.  I was home.  He didn't knock on the door, he left a "nobody was home" slip in the mailbox.   And I'm supposed to tip him?  Fark that noise.  I feel like telling my postmaster instead.
 
2013-12-18 07:59:28 PM
Tips

- the garbage man, community dumpster 0

-the paper boy, I don't get the paper 0

-the cleaning girls, I clean sometimes 0

-the janitors at work, Thieving farks 0

-Concetta from the outcall massage parlor, I get me Nookie for free, at least dinner and drinks.

Grand Total ZERO!!!!
 
2013-12-18 07:59:39 PM

Rev.K: I'm tipping everyone in this thread with a handjob.

You heard me.


Will you at least wear a Marilyn Monroe wig this time?
 
2013-12-18 08:00:04 PM

RedPhoenix122: He sees your trash, tip him before he tells the neighbors about your "used" dakis.


You don't simply throw out a daki, you wouldn't put your ex-girlfriend in the trash. Ok, most people wouldn't toss their ex-girlfriends in the trash. Ok, maybe it's ok to throw out a daki.
 
2013-12-18 08:01:18 PM

we'refromthesamestory: How many times this year are we going to have this thread?


Every day until Christmas.

/sending you five bucks as a tip for posting that.
 
2013-12-18 08:02:40 PM

weknowmemes.com

 
2013-12-18 08:02:43 PM
I'm kinda friends with the guy that cuts my hair.  I bought him a book instead of the traditional year-end super-tip.
 
2013-12-18 08:04:22 PM
I give the mail lady and the garbage guy $20.  They appreciate it and I get better service all year because they don't realize how big of a prick I am the rest of the time.
 
2013-12-18 08:06:50 PM
If your are too stupid to figure it out, $5 each.
 
2013-12-18 08:08:03 PM
I tipped the UPS guy $20.  He delivers to us all the time, so it makes sense.
 
2013-12-18 08:09:45 PM

Rev.K: I'm tipping everyone in this thread with a handjob.

You heard me.


I hope your aren't using that rose scented crap like you did last time. It's like getting a handy from your mom.
 
2013-12-18 08:09:59 PM

Prey4reign: I just moved into a new neighborhood and my garbage can had a Xmas card taped to it "from your garbage man, Bill (last name withheld to protect the clueless)."  My neighbor told me that was Bill's way of asking for a Xmas tip.  Now I find out Xmas tipping is like a tradition for a lot of people: the people listed in the headline; mail carrier; hair stylist; your kids' teachers, etc.  I'm inclined to not give Bill a brown penny because I haven't had him as "my personal garbage man" for all that long.  I'm accustomed to tipping waitresses and waiters and barbers and the guy who delivers the pizza but this puts a new wrinkle on life for me.


Back when I had a newspaper subscription, I always got a card from the delivery driver every December.  Same deal, a little elbow nudge to solicit potential tips.
 
2013-12-18 08:10:12 PM

hillbillypharmacist: I tipped the UPS guy $20.  He delivers to us all the time, so it makes sense.


I can't figure out how to tip my UPS guy.  He jumps out of the truck, runs to my door, drops the boxes, and runs away again.
 
2013-12-18 08:10:35 PM
Six pack of Alaskan Winter in the mailbox for the mailman, twelve pack for the garbage guys.
 
2013-12-18 08:11:07 PM
WTFGREEN
 
2013-12-18 08:13:42 PM

Earguy: hillbillypharmacist: I tipped the UPS guy $20.  He delivers to us all the time, so it makes sense.

I can't figure out how to tip my UPS guy.  He jumps out of the truck, runs to my door, drops the boxes, and runs away again.


Pellet Rifle will slow him down.
 
2013-12-18 08:14:32 PM

Linkster: Earguy: hillbillypharmacist: I tipped the UPS guy $20.  He delivers to us all the time, so it makes sense.

I can't figure out how to tip my UPS guy.  He jumps out of the truck, runs to my door, drops the boxes, and runs away again.

Pellet Rifle will slow him down.


grease the ice.
 
2013-12-18 08:14:38 PM

soosh: Six pack of Alaskan Winter in the mailbox for the mailman, twelve pack for the garbage guys.


Is that beer or pot?

Does pot come in a six pack?
 
2013-12-18 08:14:52 PM

Earguy: hillbillypharmacist: I tipped the UPS guy $20.  He delivers to us all the time, so it makes sense.

I can't figure out how to tip my UPS guy.  He jumps out of the truck, runs to my door, drops the boxes, and runs away again.


Yeah, me too.  But here's what I did:  I carefully strung fishing wire across my front walk, and placed an envelope (in a ziploc in case it was raining) with 'UPS MAN' printed on the front, approximately his height forward from the fishing wire.  I heard him yell "THANK YOU" a few nights ago.
 
2013-12-18 08:18:01 PM

feckingmorons: soosh: Six pack of Alaskan Winter in the mailbox for the mailman, twelve pack for the garbage guys.

Is that beer or pot?

Does pot come in a six pack?


it's beer brewed with spruce tips instead of hops.   tasty tasty stuff.

I'm not giving pot to a federal employee, even though I'm pretty sure it would be appreciated.
 
2013-12-18 08:19:19 PM

Earguy: I can't figure out how to tip my UPS guy. He jumps out of the truck, runs to my door, drops the boxes, and runs away again.


Call for pickup.

Pack a box with treats like condoms, beer, porn, coffee filters, beef jerky, AAA batteries, etc.

Write 'MR. UPS GUY' instead of a real label.
 
2013-12-18 08:19:27 PM

soosh: feckingmorons: soosh: Six pack of Alaskan Winter in the mailbox for the mailman, twelve pack for the garbage guys.

Is that beer or pot?

Does pot come in a six pack?

it's beer brewed with spruce tips instead of hops.   tasty tasty stuff.

I'm not giving pot to a federal employee, even though I'm pretty sure it would be appreciated.


They probably have their own anyway. The post office is a lot calmer these days, they haven't had a shooting in decades.
 
2013-12-18 08:21:21 PM

hillbillypharmacist: : I carefully strung fishing wire across my front walk,


and promptly beheaded the UPS guy.  I see what you're doing.
 
2013-12-18 08:22:58 PM
Nobody tips me for doing my job, so those people can kiss my ass for Christmas and be grateful for having my business.
 
2013-12-18 08:25:26 PM

feckingmorons: soosh: feckingmorons: soosh: Six pack of Alaskan Winter in the mailbox for the mailman, twelve pack for the garbage guys.

Is that beer or pot?

Does pot come in a six pack?

it's beer brewed with spruce tips instead of hops.   tasty tasty stuff.

I'm not giving pot to a federal employee, even though I'm pretty sure it would be appreciated.

They probably have their own anyway. The post office is a lot calmer these days, they haven't had a shooting in decades.


They keep that sort of stuff in the public school systems.  Kids these days.
 
2013-12-18 08:26:02 PM

feckingmorons: we'refromthesamestory: How many times this year are we going to have this thread?

Every day until Christmas.

/sending you five bucks as a tip for posting that.


media.tumblr.com
 
2013-12-18 08:26:14 PM
feckingmorons:

They probably have their own anyway. The post office is a lot calmer these days, they haven't had a shooting in decades.

Way to jinx it!
 
2013-12-18 08:27:32 PM

Mr_Ectomy: feckingmorons:

They probably have their own anyway. The post office is a lot calmer these days, they haven't had a shooting in decades.

Way to jinx it!


right?
 
2013-12-18 08:28:33 PM
Pay a living wage, no tips.
 
2013-12-18 08:28:58 PM
I'll start tipping when I start getting Christmas bonuses.
 
2013-12-18 08:30:03 PM

hillbillypharmacist: Earguy: hillbillypharmacist: I tipped the UPS guy $20.  He delivers to us all the time, so it makes sense.

I can't figure out how to tip my UPS guy.  He jumps out of the truck, runs to my door, drops the boxes, and runs away again.

Yeah, me too.  But here's what I did:  I carefully strung fishing wire across my front walk, and placed an envelope (in a ziploc in case it was raining) with 'UPS MAN' printed on the front, approximately his height forward from the fishing wire.  I heard him yell "THANK YOU" a few nights ago.


I do the same thing. Except no envelope, and the line is at ankle level.
 
2013-12-18 08:31:52 PM
Wow. This thread going green is going to mean a lot more handjobs.
 
2013-12-18 08:32:00 PM
They have cozy government jobs. I too them very generously every April.
 
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