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(Local10 WPLG)   Broward County puts an end to the practice of cow rental. In other news, you could rent cows in Florida   (local10.com) divider line 34
    More: Florida, Broward County, Corrections Corporation of America, appraisers, private prison  
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2167 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Dec 2013 at 12:50 PM (31 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



34 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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DAR [TotalFark]
2013-12-18 11:21:44 AM
This wouldn't happen out here in Iowa, I've a few farmer buddies whom rent & or swap "bulls" every year for breeding the cows.  Something about genetics I'm told.....k/dar
 
2013-12-18 11:40:52 AM
Your buddies were practicing animal husbandry until they were caught at it.
 
2013-12-18 12:51:15 PM
Is this a repeat from yesterdays prostitution bust thread?
 
2013-12-18 12:51:43 PM
They've really been cracking down on prostitution in Florida lately. Prostitution of all kinds.
 
2013-12-18 12:53:05 PM
why rent the cow when you can tap that ass for free?
 
2013-12-18 12:53:24 PM

DAR: This wouldn't happen out here in Iowa, I've a few farmer buddies whom rent & or swap "bulls" every year for breeding the cows.  Something about genetics I'm told.....k/dar


Maryland either. My family raised lambs for tasty meat and rams are an often literal pain in the ass.
 
2013-12-18 12:55:34 PM
We don't rent pigs.  Uva uvum vivendo varium fit.
 
2013-12-18 01:00:07 PM
Bad moo's for land owners.
 
2013-12-18 01:01:22 PM
Ah, don't get in the way of Government taxing your property with an agricultural exemption.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-12-18 01:01:59 PM
The Broward Property Appraiser's Office busted 127 properties it says used agricultural exemptions to receive big tax breaks -- a practice commonly called "rent-a-cow."

In Massachusetts electing to be taxed at the agricultural rate carries consequences if you convert the land to non-agricultural use. If your cow dies and you sell the land to a real estate developer, there is a 10% transfer tax and there may be other penalties too. Some similar tax exemptions give the town a right to match the financial terms of any sales contract.
 
2013-12-18 01:03:06 PM
glossynews.com
 
2013-12-18 01:06:21 PM
In Texas you can rent a herd of cattle to graze on your land for the six weeks or however long it takes to qualify for the huge agricultural rebate on your property taxes. Many is the time you will be driving through an urban setting and there's a bunch of longhorn chilling out on the front lawn of a medical company or Internet start-up.
 
2013-12-18 01:07:12 PM
They're great at parties.  Just don't let them try to wear a lampshade on their head.
 
2013-12-18 01:07:14 PM

dabbletech: [glossynews.com image 460x300]



OMFG, that's humor. Sick, but humorous.
 
2013-12-18 01:07:45 PM
Enterprise Rent a Cow.  How can I help you?

I'm calling to complain about this cow I rented from you.

Yes.  How can I help you?

Well, I reserved a full size Holstein and I got a medium Guernsey.  They said  they were out of the Holsteins but I saw a guy drive off the lot with one right behind me.  I specifically requested a milking cow.  That usually means four teats.  But this one only has one.

Those are our Economilkers.  You just have to work the single teat to get the output.

Really.

Yes and the cow won't put up a fight.  You might even get a kiss when you're down?  Now how's that?

Sounds pretty good...

Great.  I'm going to redirect you to our customer care rep, Helen Waite.  If you get cut off, just call back in and ask to go to Helen Waite. She's filling in for Heywood U. Buzzoff.  Click and clack.  Bye bye!
 
2013-12-18 01:12:39 PM
"Don't forget to tip your cow!"
 
2013-12-18 01:14:55 PM
This puts an end to cow rental in the same way the DEA puts end to the drug trade.
 
2013-12-18 01:16:28 PM
Sure this isn't about your mom, subby?
 
2013-12-18 01:28:38 PM
How many days does the animal have to spend on the land before it meets the regulations for being taxed at farmland rates?
This would be something like leasing farm land for the growing season.
Which is done everywhere.
I know that most of the landowners were using a loophole.
But I know of a few "farmland owners" that have a horse or two and that qualifies the land as farmland for tax   purposes.
 
2013-12-18 01:40:14 PM
i only tip the cow's 15%
 
2013-12-18 01:40:49 PM
the apostrophe gnome strike's again.
 
2013-12-18 01:51:41 PM

medius: i only tip the cow's 15%


If you don't tip them at least 20% they won't fall over.
 
2013-12-18 01:53:33 PM
 
2013-12-18 02:06:56 PM
Just the tip.
 
2013-12-18 03:16:34 PM
There's always plan B
img.fark.net
 
2013-12-18 03:25:26 PM

dbrunker: There's always plan B
[img.fark.net image 300x398]


That should have a NSFW tag.  Or NSF Lunch tag.  Hey, is there a slutty cow tag?
 
2013-12-18 03:46:04 PM
stand and fight like men, you stinking cowherds
 
2013-12-18 04:09:31 PM
ESCORTS, subby, they prefer to be called escorts.
 
2013-12-18 04:20:39 PM
Funny.. In many states you don't rent cows, but you can buy a share in a cow.

/That way they can legally sell you the raw milk for free. Nothing to do with taxes, just milking the issue.
 
2013-12-18 04:51:19 PM

iamgoz: ESCORTS, subby, they prefer to be called escorts.


have you rented a ford lately?
 
2013-12-18 05:05:41 PM
Harry Freakstorm:

Enterprise Rent a Cow. How can I help you?

I'm calling to complain about this cow I rented from you.

Yes. How can I help you?

Well, I reserved a full size Holstein and I got a medium Guernsey. They said they were out of the Holsteins but I saw a guy drive off the lot with one right behind me. I specifically requested a milking cow. That usually means four teats. But this one only has one.

Those are our Economilkers. You just have to work the single teat to get the output.

Really.

Yes and the cow won't put up a fight. You might even get a kiss when you're down? Now how's that?

Sounds pretty good...

Great. I'm going to redirect you to our customer care rep, Helen Waite. If you get cut off, just call back in and ask to go to Helen Waite. She's filling in for Heywood U. Buzzoff. Click and clack. Bye bye!


I have a friend who does... well, pretty much exactly that for Enterprise. Mind if I steal that?
 
2013-12-18 06:36:40 PM
fine, but will i get my the deposit back?

asking for a friend...
 
2013-12-18 07:43:57 PM
They don't rent pigs!
s3.amazonaws.com
 
2013-12-18 07:45:26 PM
You don't rent a cow for the exemption, you rent them so they leave in the morning.
 
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