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(Mirror.co.uk)   Man asks directions from strangers, wakes up in ER with shot glass up his ass hours later and doesn't remember a thing. Or so his story goes (with X-ray goodness. We know how you love those)   (mirror.co.uk) divider line 75
    More: Unlikely, Chinese TV  
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10253 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Dec 2013 at 11:53 AM (35 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



75 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-12-17 11:51:53 AM
(sigh) If I only had a nickle for the times I've woken up in the ER with a shot-glass up my ass...
 
2013-12-17 11:55:21 AM
TO BILL BRASKY!
 
2013-12-17 11:56:49 AM

076dd0a50e0c1255009e-bd4b8aabaca29897bc751dfaf75b290c.r40.cf1.rackcdn.com

 
2013-12-17 11:58:28 AM
it's the rarely used schezwan  revival method, you have to use the shot glass to hold the soy sauce
 
2013-12-17 11:59:43 AM
Million to one shot, doc. Million to one.
 
2013-12-17 12:00:20 PM
img.fark.netimg.fark.net
 
2013-12-17 12:05:04 PM
Ok that thing was almost 2 inches wide, now I'm not saying this guy is lying but I don't think anyone that isn't used to inserting items could get a 2" thick item in there.

My bet is kinky time went south when they put that in and couldn't get it out.
 
2013-12-17 12:05:42 PM
I hate when that happens.
 
2013-12-17 12:07:10 PM
And this my dear females is why men don't stop to ask for directions.
 
2013-12-17 12:09:10 PM
I have some friends who work in an ER. Foreign objects in the rectum are quite common.

TNel: Ok that thing was almost 2 inches wide, now I'm not saying this guy is lying but I don't think anyone that isn't used to inserting items could get a 2" thick item in there.


well he was bleeding from the ass, and it is china so it could have happened as told.

/rape van photo
 
2013-12-17 12:09:38 PM
Thats his story and he's sticking to it.
 
2013-12-17 12:11:55 PM
What we have here is a case of USGIA

s23.postimg.org
 
2013-12-17 12:12:42 PM
I wonder if the Xray I saw back in med school of the Mrs. Butterworth's bottle up the rectum is out there somewhere.  I better go look!
 
2013-12-17 12:12:59 PM

TNel: Ok that thing was almost 2 inches wide, now I'm not saying this guy is lying but I don't think anyone that isn't used to inserting items could get a 2" thick item in there.

My bet is kinky time went south when they put that in and couldn't get it out.


People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.
 
2013-12-17 12:13:11 PM
Was it full? The shot glass, not the dude's ass.
 
2013-12-17 12:13:12 PM

justanotherfarkinfarker: well he was bleeding from the ass, and it is china so it could have happened as told.

/rape van photo


eh that's a delicate location.  I'm still going with him saving face.
 
2013-12-17 12:15:28 PM

Sin_City_Superhero: Was it full? The shot glass, not the dude's ass.


i23.photobucket.com
 
2013-12-17 12:18:40 PM

HailRobonia: People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.


From inside to outside is different than outside to inside.  Go get a 2" thick blunt rod and see how easy it is to insert.  Ever notice how your turds are taperd?
 
2013-12-17 12:21:16 PM

TNel: justanotherfarkinfarker: well he was bleeding from the ass, and it is china so it could have happened as told.

/rape van photo

eh that's a delicate location.  I'm still going with him saving face.


His BS excuse is BS. 3 men in a van, can't remember a thing...... yeah right.

At least it's a better excuse than falling backwards (at the same time as his trousers fell off) and he landed on the shot glass.
 
2013-12-17 12:22:00 PM
theverbalrelease.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-12-17 12:23:54 PM
This guy needs to get some new friends. Sharpie on the face is one thing.
 
2013-12-17 12:24:12 PM

HailRobonia: TNel: Ok that thing was almost 2 inches wide, now I'm not saying this guy is lying but I don't think anyone that isn't used to inserting items could get a 2" thick item in there.

My bet is kinky time went south when they put that in and couldn't get it out.

People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.


Hmmm you sound tampered with?
/NTTIAWWT
 
2013-12-17 12:25:01 PM

HailRobonia: TNel: Ok that thing was almost 2 inches wide, now I'm not saying this guy is lying but I don't think anyone that isn't used to inserting items could get a 2" thick item in there.

My bet is kinky time went south when they put that in and couldn't get it out.

People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.


For a size comparison, the normal width of duct tape is 1.9" to 2.0" so go and get your roll and see what width we are talking about.  Also don't forget 2" in width is 6.28" in circumference.....
 
2013-12-17 12:28:36 PM
Will not look.
 
2013-12-17 12:28:51 PM
Just the shot glass?  Keep looking - there should be a bottle of tequila and  a half bag of Doritos.
 
2013-12-17 12:29:15 PM
This is what happens when you find a stranger in the alps
 
2013-12-17 12:29:48 PM
guy got shiatfaced
 
2013-12-17 12:34:49 PM
Thats why I dont do shots. Im never in a hurry to get trashed anyway, slow and steady buzz is the way to go
 
2013-12-17 12:37:38 PM

TNel: HailRobonia: People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.

From inside to outside is different than outside to inside.  Go get a 2" thick blunt rod and see how easy it is to insert.  Ever notice how your turds are taperd?


I thought that was so your asshole didn't slam shut.
 
2013-12-17 12:38:51 PM

TNel: HailRobonia: People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.

From inside to outside is different than outside to inside.  Go get a 2" thick blunt rod and see how easy it is to insert.  Ever notice how your turds are taperd?


Happens nightly in the Castro.
 
2013-12-17 12:38:56 PM

TNel: HailRobonia: People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.

From inside to outside is different than outside to inside.  Go get a 2" thick blunt rod and see how easy it is to insert.  Ever notice how your turds are taperd?


I tried your experiment and __________________.

a) you owe me a new flashlight
b) I'm stuck like a carousel horse
c) tried it with a toy lightsaber and now my ass goes vrrmmmm vrrrmmm vrmmm when I walk
d) c-c-c-c-c-an't f-f-f-f-ind th-th-the off-ff-f b-b-b-button on the v-v-v-v-vibrator
 
2013-12-17 12:39:03 PM
www.indiewire.com

It's been an interesting 48 hours.
 
2013-12-17 12:42:27 PM

Prey4reign: TNel: HailRobonia: People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.

From inside to outside is different than outside to inside.  Go get a 2" thick blunt rod and see how easy it is to insert.  Ever notice how your turds are taperd?

Happens nightly in the Castro.


Oh my
 
2013-12-17 12:43:51 PM
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-12-17 12:44:29 PM

HailRobonia: I tried your experiment and __________________.

a) you owe me a new flashlight
b) I'm stuck like a carousel horse
c) tried it with a toy lightsaber and now my ass goes vrrmmmm vrrrmmm vrmmm when I walk
d) c-c-c-c-c-an't f-f-f-f-ind th-th-the off-ff-f b-b-b-button on the v-v-v-v-vibrator


LOL
 
2013-12-17 12:46:05 PM

HailRobonia: TNel: Ok that thing was almost 2 inches wide, now I'm not saying this guy is lying but I don't think anyone that isn't used to inserting items could get a 2" thick item in there.

My bet is kinky time went south when they put that in and couldn't get it out.

People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.


Your poops are >2" thick? Seriously, WTF is wrong with your colon?
 
2013-12-17 12:46:26 PM

TNel: HailRobonia: I tried your experiment and __________________.

a) you owe me a new flashlight
b) I'm stuck like a carousel horse
c) tried it with a toy lightsaber and now my ass goes vrrmmmm vrrrmmm vrmmm when I walk
d) c-c-c-c-c-an't f-f-f-f-ind th-th-the off-ff-f b-b-b-button on the v-v-v-v-vibrator

LOL


New keyboard, stat.
 
2013-12-17 12:47:30 PM

Jument: HailRobonia: TNel: Ok that thing was almost 2 inches wide, now I'm not saying this guy is lying but I don't think anyone that isn't used to inserting items could get a 2" thick item in there.

My bet is kinky time went south when they put that in and couldn't get it out.

People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.

Your poops are >2" thick? Seriously, WTF is wrong with your colon?


Lots of red meat and a sedentary lifestyle.
 
2013-12-17 12:52:35 PM

semiotix: [www.indiewire.com image 680x478]

It's been an interesting 48 hours.


Beat me to it
 
2013-12-17 01:00:33 PM
 
2013-12-17 01:01:30 PM

Jument: Your poops are >2" thick? Seriously, WTF is wrong with your colon?


Since we've gone off the rails a bit, I'll share this: I've dropped some pretty big logs before in which I couldn't help but stand up and observe in amazement before flushing thinking to myself "how the fark did that NOT hurt?". Invariably, there's also been plenty of time I've sat there grunting and stomping only to find out all I mustered were two or three pebbles.

Buttholes are weird.
 
2013-12-17 01:02:43 PM

Kit Fister: Jument: HailRobonia: TNel: Ok that thing was almost 2 inches wide, now I'm not saying this guy is lying but I don't think anyone that isn't used to inserting items could get a 2" thick item in there.

My bet is kinky time went south when they put that in and couldn't get it out.

People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.

Your poops are >2" thick? Seriously, WTF is wrong with your colon?

Lots of red meat and a sedentary lifestyle.


img.fark.net
 
2013-12-17 01:05:28 PM

Killer Cars: I've dropped some pretty big logs


Did you heal them down the drain?
 
2013-12-17 01:12:45 PM

genepool lifeboat: Did you heal them down the drain?


I'm actually pretty impressed with myself that, in my nearly 30 years of existence thus far, otherwise rife with questionable decision making, I've yet to crap in the shower.
 
2013-12-17 01:13:57 PM
This is a shiatty thread.

/all i got
//anus
 
2013-12-17 01:14:13 PM

Kit Fister: TNel: HailRobonia: I tried your experiment and __________________.

a) you owe me a new flashlight
b) I'm stuck like a carousel horse
c) tried it with a toy lightsaber and now my ass goes vrrmmmm vrrrmmm vrmmm when I walk
d) c-c-c-c-c-an't f-f-f-f-ind th-th-the off-ff-f b-b-b-button on the v-v-v-v-vibrator

LOL

New keyboard, stat.


I don't even WANT to know what happened to the keyboard.
 
2013-12-17 01:15:06 PM

justanotherfarkinfarker: rectum


Rectum? Damn near killed him.
 
2013-12-17 01:17:39 PM

TNel: HailRobonia: People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.

From inside to outside is different than outside to inside.  Go get a 2" thick blunt rod and see how easy it is to insert.  Ever notice how your turds are taperd?




Going to avoid details but, for anyone with regular constipation issues, that wouldn't be a problem, in either direction. I was surprised to learn most people have to adjust to certain acts, because I certainly didn't.
 
2013-12-17 01:19:57 PM
files.coloribus.com
 
2013-12-17 01:21:36 PM

doloresonthedottedline: TNel: HailRobonia: People poop out turds that are thicker than 2" all the times, so it seems buttholes are trickier than you think.

From inside to outside is different than outside to inside.  Go get a 2" thick blunt rod and see how easy it is to insert.  Ever notice how your turds are taperd?

Going to avoid details but, for anyone with regular constipation issues, that wouldn't be a problem, in either direction. I was surprised to learn most people have to adjust to certain acts, because I certainly didn't.




And the first guy I was with came close to that size if he didn't meet it.
 
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