If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Opposing Views)   School decides not to call 911 when 6-year-old girl loses a piece of her finger because they "didn't feel like it was an emergency"   (opposingviews.com) divider line 31
    More: Asinine, Amazing Johnson, Amazing, emergency  
•       •       •

11758 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Dec 2013 at 7:02 PM (31 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-12-15 07:16:43 PM
5 votes:

Quantum Apostrophe: Don't touch it, it'll regrow.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Regeneration_%28biology%29#Fingers


Just 3D print a replacement
2013-12-15 05:06:27 PM
5 votes:

hardinparamedic: Well. That was stupid. The person who made the decision not to call 911 for that is an amazing johnson him/herself.


Back in my day you had walk 15 miles in the snow, uphill both ways, to get chewing gum to stick it back on from old Mr McGee's Irish/Chinese Restaurant and Chewing Gum Emporium on fifth street, back when we only had a few streets so we named them all by numbers, which were called Arabian Counters because of John Tower's work as Secretary of state in Arabia during that administration, which as you know preceded the Oil Glut by just seven years, and so that's when we stopped giving our horses greaser hairdos, although we kept making the leather jackets in horse sizes well into the next decade.
2013-12-15 04:59:17 PM
5 votes:
they cut a piece off an amazing johnson :(
2013-12-15 05:04:21 PM
4 votes:
Alas, she was born a fifteen or so years too late for her soulmate:

www.iltlaugh.com
2013-12-15 07:33:43 PM
2 votes:

brantgoose: Don't horse around with booze and saws, as the shop teacher on South Park would put it


Richard......

COME WATCH ME FLY RICHARD!!!

southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com
2013-12-15 07:09:18 PM
2 votes:
Amazingness aside....If a 6-year old's having a piece of her finger cut off is not an emergency warranting a 911 call, one wonders what would be. Does the nurse subscribe to the Black Knight theory of limb amputation? "Tis but a scratch!"
2013-12-15 06:20:15 PM
2 votes:

NickelP: you missed a hoty quality setup here subs. 'piece of amazing johnson severed off after getting caught in door' was a gimme and I'm not even giving this much thought


Perhaps you should resubmit it Juan Moore time.
2013-12-16 03:10:19 PM
1 votes:

High Five State!: yeah I really doubt that, You're probably the moron I took care of who called 911 because they had an ear ache.


glmorrs1:You must be the nurse who handed over a patient for transport with breathing problems that put the nasal cannula on wrong, didn't turn the O2 on, and told me his lung sounds were clear in all quadrants when you coul hear the rales fom across the room.

Will you two just fark already? That way, we can get to attacking the real enemy. Nursing Home LPNs. :)
2013-12-16 11:10:47 AM
1 votes:

High Five State!: glmorrs1: High Five State!: Please don't call 911 for stupid crap like this. 911 is for life threatining emergencies. Not because your dumb kid smashed the tip of a finger.

Not just smashed the finger, but crushed the finger to the point that the tip was amputated beneath the nail. This type of injury could very well cause enough bleeding to send a child into shock.

yeah I really doubt that, You're probably the moron I took care of who called 911 because they had an ear ache.


Dude, I'm an EMT. I take people to the hospital for all kinds of minor shiat that they don't really need an ambulance for.

You must be the nurse who handed over a patient for transport with breathing problems that put the nasal cannula on wrong, didn't turn the O2 on, and told me his lung sounds were clear in all quadrants when you coul hear the rales fom across the room.
2013-12-15 10:58:49 PM
1 votes:
It's gonna be great when this chick is working at Checkers when she's 35... "Hey uh, Amazing, yeah when you're done scraping the grease trap I'm gonna need you to mop the women's bathroom, that homeless woman from behind Walgreens took a dump on the floor again... Thanks Amazing."
2013-12-15 10:00:42 PM
1 votes:
It was always fun in high school to hear the principal call "Anita Mann" over the intercom.

35a59187dd725071ab09-4115d042ae08198197dff10db0ba43c9.r29.cf1.rackcdn.com
2013-12-15 09:46:42 PM
1 votes:

Curious: doglover: Only works in kids. Like greenwood fractures.

my link was a 33 y/o jockey but when you read the whole article i'm not sure it truly regenerated. they used the pig bladder cells to make a scaffold for the tissue to grow onto. kind of like the ear grown on the back of a mouse. close but on OEM quality.


I meant the natural growback.

I knew guys and girls who lost their fingertips on the cutting board. Some were wee, and their fingers are fine now. Some were not so wee, and they can only count to 9.95
2013-12-15 09:42:30 PM
1 votes:

E5bie: I have worked with lovely people who have names that made me feel gross when I said them. I got over it.


Moist VanGellica.

Ji`Haad Il`Jabella

Lovely Johnson

Vaccine Duodinal

Candy Krushinka

Mo'Fuggly

/yes, these are real names.
2013-12-15 09:18:01 PM
1 votes:
Not so amazing now.
2013-12-15 08:40:46 PM
1 votes:

Fair_Poopsmith: "This is our daughter, Fantastic Dick."


www.schnittberichte.com

"Guard number one is a senior on Klan's mountain and aspires to be a research chemist. Welcome, please, Hung Well."

www.schnittberichte.com

"Guard number two is a real skating buff. A warm welcome for Long Wang!"

www.schnittberichte.com

"Traveling comes naturally to guard number three, as he's a licensed airplane pilot. Welcome, please, Enormous Genitals!"
2013-12-15 08:18:34 PM
1 votes:

orclover: Is your family composed of rock trolls or hill trolls?  Does Darwinism apply to any of you or do you all safely ignore it like bugs bunny ignores physics?


It's Canada. It doesn't matter how you injure yourself, everything just freezes instantly and almost no one ever dies from amputations. That's why Canadians are so carefree.
2013-12-15 08:06:37 PM
1 votes:
The amazing johnson debuts new trick making the tip disappear
2013-12-15 07:42:42 PM
1 votes:

NickelP: unexpectly, school officials make new policy that just the tip from amazing johnson is no big deal


Catholic School? :D
2013-12-15 07:41:59 PM
1 votes:
unexpectly, school officials make new policy that just the tip from amazing johnson is no big deal
2013-12-15 07:40:34 PM
1 votes:
farm3.staticflickr.com
2013-12-15 07:38:30 PM
1 votes:
If they  didcall 911, the family would complain about having to pay for the ambulance ride.

"You called 911?  We have to pay $500 for the ride now!  Why didn't you just call us?!"
2013-12-15 07:38:21 PM
1 votes:

Rincewind53: NickelP: they cut a piece off an amazing johnson :(

Look, I'm all for "name your kid whatever you want" but...

JESUS.


Obviously named after her daddy. Whoever he was.
2013-12-15 07:32:27 PM
1 votes:
You think Amazing is a weird name, try this, one of my favorites from "Overheard in New York":

Nurse #1: I know, I still can't believe she signed that name on the birth certificate.
Doctor: What name?
Nurse #2: When Dr. Smith* delivered the afterbirth, this mom said, 'Oh my god, what is that?' and Dr. Smith said, 'That's the placenta.'
Nurse #1: Yeah, and then the freakin' idiot says, 'That's the most beautiful name I ever heard! I'm gonna name my baby Placenta.'
Doctor: No, don't tell me-
Nurse #2: Yep.
Doctor: I'm sorry I asked.

-Hospital cafeteria
2013-12-15 07:31:22 PM
1 votes:
i.imgur.com

Is this something you can share with the rest of us Amazing Larry?
2013-12-15 07:20:35 PM
1 votes:
HURR ABOLISH THE DEPT OF EDUCATION
STARVE THE BEAST STARVE THE BEAST STARVE THE BEAST!
2013-12-15 07:16:47 PM
1 votes:

orclover: White kids get EMS.  Black kids get a "not my farking problem" from the principal.  Hell if it were my kid I wouldnt even mind them not calling EMS if they would have just taken my kid directly to the hospital with the finger for treatment.


So now the black kid is getting his finger sewn back on, AND a substantial settlement from the school system.

I don't think they thought their cunning plan all the way through.
2013-12-15 07:15:19 PM
1 votes:
I think I found the problem.
www.opposingviews.com
White kids get EMS.  Black kids get a "not my farking problem" from the principal.  Hell if it were my kid I wouldnt even mind them not calling EMS if they would have just taken my kid directly to the hospital with the finger for treatment.

/ok now imagine she's white.  Now did the school do something wrong? no?  Ok imagine you actually have a shred of decency, lets work from there.
2013-12-15 05:19:05 PM
1 votes:
Simple.  Just tell them she took an Advil to deal with the pain.  You'll have 6 cruisers and a K-9 unit in the parking lot within seconds thanks to zero tolerance.
2013-12-15 05:04:21 PM
1 votes:
Amazing!
2013-12-15 05:01:44 PM
1 votes:
you missed a hoty quality setup here subs. 'piece of amazing johnson severed off after getting caught in door' was a gimme and I'm not even giving this much thought
2013-12-15 04:56:27 PM
1 votes:
Well. That was stupid. The person who made the decision not to call 911 for that is an amazing johnson him/herself.
 
Displayed 31 of 31 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report