If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Slate)   Everybody hates the college essay -- the students writing them and the professors grading them. So why are they still being done?   (slate.com) divider line 22
    More: Interesting, Everybody Hates, college essay, University of Missouri-St, Waste of Time, professors, The Sun Also Rises, Virginia Woolf  
•       •       •

3222 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Dec 2013 at 6:50 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-12-14 05:26:12 PM  
10 votes:
Many people hate the college essay. These people include the students who write them and the professors who grade them. They hate the college essay for many reasons. These reasons include that essays have many rules, essays require citation, and essays are difficult to grade.

The first reason people don't like college essays is that they have many rules. This means that when a person writes an essay, he or she has to follow specific rules, like not writing in the first person. "First person" means "a set of words or word forms (such as pronouns or verb forms) that refer to the person who is speaking or writing" (Merriam Webster). First person is considered informal and therefore cannot be used in college essays, which are considered formal. Therefore, if the writer of an essay doesn't know the rule about not writing in the first person, he or she will not write correctly. There are other rules that a writer must know to write an essay but the first person rule is a big one.

The second reason people don't like college essays is that they require citation. An essay writer cannot just say something is a fact unless it comes from somewhere else. This is called citing a source. An example of citing a source is in the previous paragraph of this essay, in which the writer used the term "first person" and then cited where the definition for it came from, which was the Merriam Webster dictionary. If a writer turns in an essay without at least one cited source, it will receive a bad grade and so citing sources is very important. However, citation takes a long time and so this is another reason why people don't like writing essays.

The third reason people don't like college essays is that they are hard to grade. This is because the college professors must read each one from start to finish to know if the writer followed the rules and used citation, and when a professor has many students this can take a long time. Also, lots of students sometimes think that they deserve a better grade than the professor gives them, and this is why they have to keep Office Hours. Office hours are the hours that a professor has to be in his or her office to talk to students.

As stated above, there are there many reasons that people don't like college essays. Those reasons include that they have many rules, that they require citation, and that they are hard to grade. There are other reasons that people don't like college essays, but those are three important ones. In conclusion, college essays are hard and many people don't like them.

I have neither given nor received any help on this work, nor am I aware of any infractions of the Honor Code.
2013-12-14 04:51:10 PM  
5 votes:
Essays are great because they teach you how to bullsh*t. An essential skill in life.
2013-12-14 07:58:53 PM  
3 votes:
Intro:
Hook (3 sentences),
Connector (3 sentences),
Thesis
Body 1:
Topic sentence,
Evidence,
Analysis (1),
Analysis (2),
Analysis (3),
Transition,
Evidence 2,
Analysis (1),
Analysis (2),
Analysis (3),
Concluding sentence
Body 2:
Topic sentence,
Evidence,
Analysis (1),
Analysis (2),
Analysis (3),
Transition,
Evidence 2,
Analysis (1),
Analysis (2),
Analysis (3),
Concluding sentence
Body 3:
Topic sentence,
Evidence,
Analysis (1),
Analysis (2),
Analysis (3),
Transition,
Evidence 2,
Analysis (1),
Analysis (2),
Analysis (3),
Concluding sentence
Conclusion:
Sum up all of your elements, and make your essay sound finished.
(Use about 7 sentences similar to the intro)
Best essay ever.
2013-12-14 06:58:33 PM  
3 votes:

Pocket Ninja: Many people hate the college essay. These people include the students who write them and the professors who grade them. They hate the college essay for many reasons. These reasons include that essays have many rules, essays require citation, and essays are difficult to grade.

The first reason people don't like college essays is that they have many rules. This means that when a person writes an essay, he or she has to follow specific rules, like not writing in the first person. "First person" means "a set of words or word forms (such as pronouns or verb forms) that refer to the person who is speaking or writing" (Merriam Webster). First person is considered informal and therefore cannot be used in college essays, which are considered formal. Therefore, if the writer of an essay doesn't know the rule about not writing in the first person, he or she will not write correctly. There are other rules that a writer must know to write an essay but the first person rule is a big one.

The second reason people don't like college essays is that they require citation. An essay writer cannot just say something is a fact unless it comes from somewhere else. This is called citing a source. An example of citing a source is in the previous paragraph of this essay, in which the writer used the term "first person" and then cited where the definition for it came from, which was the Merriam Webster dictionary. If a writer turns in an essay without at least one cited source, it will receive a bad grade and so citing sources is very important. However, citation takes a long time and so this is another reason why people don't like writing essays.

The third reason people don't like college essays is that they are hard to grade. This is because the college professors must read each one from start to finish to know if the writer followed the rules and used citation, and when a professor has many students this can take a long time. Also, lots of students sometimes think that they deserve a be ...


And that's why PN has a special color, just for PN.

/essays are the language equivalent of "show your work"
2013-12-14 06:22:55 PM  
3 votes:
I like the quip about plagiarism at the start of the article. I don't know about the author's school, but we punish plagiarism severely.  The minimum punishment is usually a zero on the assignment (easiest for the professors, because they don't need to involve the disciplinary committee), but it's not uncommon for the really egregious ones to actually be expelled.  In the case of international students, this results in a revocation of their student visa and deportation.  In the case of all students, it means a whole lot of student debt and exactly nothing to show for it.

And you know what? We don't have a big problem with plagiarism.
2013-12-14 05:38:40 PM  
3 votes:
Because they listen to how your dumb ass talks and texts.. Those colleges want to make sure you can actually put together a coherent thought on paper.
2013-12-14 07:17:35 PM  
2 votes:
This article is just  so damn petulant too. All the sarcastic, snide asides to her hypothetical student readership seem remarkably unprofessional and whiny. Yeah, your job sucks, but you knew exactly what was going to be asked of you when you took it, and you at least TA'd in grad school. Don't get a job in a coal mine then start freaking out about how tedious and shiatty it is to swing a pick axe into rock (or something).

I spent time in grad school with people like this, who complain about the majority of their labor being spent on grading. What's your ideal? Getting paid to sit in a room and think, occasionally descending upon the populace to lead a glorified book club discussion?
2013-12-14 07:14:46 PM  
2 votes:

Fubini: I like the quip about plagiarism at the start of the article. I don't know about the author's school, but we punish plagiarism severely.  The minimum punishment is usually a zero on the assignment (easiest for the professors, because they don't need to involve the disciplinary committee), but it's not uncommon for the really egregious ones to actually be expelled.  In the case of international students, this results in a revocation of their student visa and deportation.  In the case of all students, it means a whole lot of student debt and exactly nothing to show for it.

And you know what? We don't have a big problem with plagiarism.


The teacher is misguided, in my opinion. If what she wrote is a chunk of what she believes, she doesn't like teaching very much.
2013-12-14 07:00:04 PM  
2 votes:
God forbid we teach students how to make a clear point instead of just regurgitate True or False back or Multiple Choice back at the instructor.

/I weep for this country - it's like we're purposely trying to make kids stupid.
2013-12-15 12:05:20 AM  
1 votes:
So this person wrote what amounts to an essay to biatch about college student having to write essays?
2013-12-14 07:53:55 PM  
1 votes:

Omnis_evil_twin: I generally got good grades on my essays and papers and I generally enjoyed writing them.  What killed me though were the professors that assigned a five page essay and then, after all the papers were turned in, announced to the class that anything less than ten pages would automatically be getting a C.  Passive aggressive bastards.


0.o

Did you not raise hell?

Was that grading scheme specified in the syllabus?

/either fishy story or fishy school
2013-12-14 07:42:05 PM  
1 votes:
tl;dr nobody likes essays because they require effort
2013-12-14 07:18:57 PM  
1 votes:
Jesuz christ on a pogo stock. Now the task of making a reasoned argument with evidence is under attack simply because it's too much work.? Persuasive written communication is what separates us from the animals. Work is hard. Deal with it.


I'm all for trying new things to help advance the field of learning but fark these people. Fark them up their stupid arses. There. That's my argument.
2013-12-14 07:14:47 PM  
1 votes:
Pocket Ninja is a national treasure. No cite, but res ipsa loquitur.
2013-12-14 07:13:33 PM  
1 votes:
I loved writing essays; I once got Jerry Springer, Darwin, Charles Dickens, and The Three Stooges in a paper - it was awesome and great fun to write.  Got an A.  My papers were never boring.
2013-12-14 07:11:42 PM  
1 votes:
So why are they still being done?

Because until one requires students to demonstrate their own ideas and analysis one has no idea if they truly know their asses from their elbows.

But hey, keep telling yourself that taking that multiple-choice test in the 400-student lecture class at that big-name university is gonna get you as good an education as actually interacting one-on-one with a professor at a small liberal arts and sciences college.
2013-12-14 07:01:21 PM  
1 votes:
Not gonna lie, writing about things in college did better help me understand them.
2013-12-14 07:00:56 PM  
1 votes:

Pocket Ninja: Many people hate the college essay. These people include the students who write them and the professors who grade them. They hate the college essay for many reasons. These reasons include that essays have many rules, essays require citation, and essays are difficult to grade.

The first reason people don't like college essays is that they have many rules. This means that when a person writes an essay, he or she has to follow specific rules, like not writing in the first person. "First person" means "a set of words or word forms (such as pronouns or verb forms) that refer to the person who is speaking or writing" (Merriam Webster). First person is considered informal and therefore cannot be used in college essays, which are considered formal. Therefore, if the writer of an essay doesn't know the rule about not writing in the first person, he or she will not write correctly. There are other rules that a writer must know to write an essay but the first person rule is a big one.

The second reason people don't like college essays is that they require citation. An essay writer cannot just say something is a fact unless it comes from somewhere else. This is called citing a source. An example of citing a source is in the previous paragraph of this essay, in which the writer used the term "first person" and then cited where the definition for it came from, which was the Merriam Webster dictionary. If a writer turns in an essay without at least one cited source, it will receive a bad grade and so citing sources is very important. However, citation takes a long time and so this is another reason why people don't like writing essays.

The third reason people don't like college essays is that they are hard to grade. This is because the college professors must read each one from start to finish to know if the writer followed the rules and used citation, and when a professor has many students this can take a long time. Also, lots of students sometimes think that they deserve a be ...


Did not follow APA guidelines when citing sources   -10 pts.
2013-12-14 07:00:24 PM  
1 votes:

Pocket Ninja: Many people hate the college essay. These people include the students who write them and the professors who grade them. They hate the college essay for many reasons. These reasons include that essays have many rules, essays require citation, and essays are difficult to grade.

The first reason people don't like college essays is that they have many rules. This means that when a person writes an essay, he or she has to follow specific rules, like not writing in the first person. "First person" means "a set of words or word forms (such as pronouns or verb forms) that refer to the person who is speaking or writing" (Merriam Webster). First person is considered informal and therefore cannot be used in college essays, which are considered formal. Therefore, if the writer of an essay doesn't know the rule about not writing in the first person, he or she will not write correctly. There are other rules that a writer must know to write an essay but the first person rule is a big one.

The second reason people don't like college essays is that they require citation. An essay writer cannot just say something is a fact unless it comes from somewhere else. This is called citing a source. An example of citing a source is in the previous paragraph of this essay, in which the writer used the term "first person" and then cited where the definition for it came from, which was the Merriam Webster dictionary. If a writer turns in an essay without at least one cited source, it will receive a bad grade and so citing sources is very important. However, citation takes a long time and so this is another reason why people don't like writing essays.

The third reason people don't like college essays is that they are hard to grade. This is because the college professors must read each one from start to finish to know if the writer followed the rules and used citation, and when a professor has many students this can take a long time. Also, lots of students sometimes think that they deserve a be ...


reactiongifs.me
2013-12-14 06:55:21 PM  
1 votes:
I don't hate it. In fact I quite enjoy it. Would MUCH rather write papers than do tedious daily homework or the abysmally EVIL and USELESS group project. Seriously, without essays wtf is left of school?
2013-12-14 06:53:57 PM  
1 votes:

Pocket Ninja: Many people hate the college essay. These people include the students who write them and the professors who grade them. They hate the college essay for many reasons. These reasons include that essays have many rules, essays require citation, and essays are difficult to grade.

The first reason people don't like college essays is that they have many rules. This means that when a person writes an essay, he or she has to follow specific rules, like not writing in the first person. "First person" means "a set of words or word forms (such as pronouns or verb forms) that refer to the person who is speaking or writing" (Merriam Webster). First person is considered informal and therefore cannot be used in college essays, which are considered formal. Therefore, if the writer of an essay doesn't know the rule about not writing in the first person, he or she will not write correctly. There are other rules that a writer must know to write an essay but the first person rule is a big one.

The second reason people don't like college essays is that they require citation. An essay writer cannot just say something is a fact unless it comes from somewhere else. This is called citing a source. An example of citing a source is in the previous paragraph of this essay, in which the writer used the term "first person" and then cited where the definition for it came from, which was the Merriam Webster dictionary. If a writer turns in an essay without at least one cited source, it will receive a bad grade and so citing sources is very important. However, citation takes a long time and so this is another reason why people don't like writing essays.

The third reason people don't like college essays is that they are hard to grade. This is because the college professors must read each one from start to finish to know if the writer followed the rules and used citation, and when a professor has many students this can take a long time. Also, lots of students sometimes think that they deserve a be ...


/Citation needed
2013-12-14 04:43:20 PM  
1 votes:
I liked writing essays, usually an easy A for me. Multiple choice exams, however, tripped me up. I always talked myself out of the right answer.
 
Displayed 22 of 22 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report