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(Orlando Sentinel)   Let's see what's being banned from Florida elementary schools this week. Oh dear, those are trouble   (orlandosentinel.com) divider line 53
    More: Florida, elementary schools, StarChild Academy, private schools, Apopka, voluntary compliance, middle schools  
•       •       •

12583 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Dec 2013 at 4:08 AM (41 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



53 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-12-14 02:39:38 AM
Her daughters have made bracelets to cheer the University of Florida Gators

There's your problem right there. The school administrators are Seminoles.
 
2013-12-14 04:11:54 AM
Now how are they gonna remind themselves to stop smoking meth. SNAP! OUCH!
 
2013-12-14 04:15:01 AM
Caryn Oxley Sommersdorf ...


And there's the other part of your problem right there.
 
2013-12-14 04:19:18 AM

Huck And Molly Ziegler: Caryn Oxley Sommersdorf ...


And there's the other part of your problem right there.


It reads like a pharmaceutical product.
 
2013-12-14 04:20:04 AM
The parents are against the ban until some dumb snowflake eats one
 
2013-12-14 04:20:44 AM
About time! Damn gangbangers and their brightly colored bracelets!
 
2013-12-14 04:22:35 AM
OH MY GOD WHO CARES

If you go to the farking media because your kids can't wear rubber bands to school, you are in dire farking need of something constructive to do.

And everyone involved in actually putting this bullshiat in the paper ought to be ashamed of themselves. As usual.
 
2013-12-14 04:27:57 AM
I bet it's those darn sex bracelets again.


 *reads article*


Meh, close enough.
 
2013-12-14 04:37:06 AM

Omnis_evil_twin: I bet it's those darn sex bracelets again.


 *reads article*


Meh, close enough.


Damn near fell out my chair
 
2013-12-14 04:38:06 AM
Geez is there anything too petty that some authoritarian school administrator d-bag won't get a bug up their ass about?

/rhetorical question
//the answer is no
 
2013-12-14 04:41:05 AM
"Children are in the classroom playing with them, having them in their desks, throwing them around the room, exchanging them. They're more than just a bracelet," said Cindy Zimmermann, owner of the StarChild, which has students in kindergarten to grade five.

Drink.
 
2013-12-14 04:44:53 AM
The teachers were probably feeling left out.
spacebison.com
 
2013-12-14 04:45:39 AM
Starchild Academy?
images.popmatters.com
 
2013-12-14 04:48:19 AM
Reminds me of when I got Pokémon banned from my elementary school. Some douchebag kid went into my backpack and stole my cards. When I went to the principle and pointed out who did it (because he bragged about it to everyone who would listen) instead of making him give me my cards back they gave me detention for causing a disturbance and banned everything Pokémon.

Never even got my cards back and the kid who did it ridiculed me over the fiasco for years.
 
2013-12-14 04:51:31 AM
StarChild Academy,

College admission?
 
2013-12-14 04:57:33 AM
This is what happens when you let your schools be run by people who are so stupid that the only degree they can get is an education degree.
 
2013-12-14 05:03:23 AM

Monkeyfark Ridiculous: OH MY GOD WHO CARES

If you go to the farking media because your kids can't wear rubber bands to school, you are in dire farking need of something constructive to do.

And everyone involved in actually putting this bullshiat in the paper ought to be ashamed of themselves. As usual.


Pray, do tell us, oh wise one, what is the bar for stupid over-reaches-by-school-administrators to become news. Please provide a chart. Your insights will be invaluable. We'll make sure school admins all over the country get your instructions.

Not saying this is an over-reach. Not saying you're wrong about this not being newsworthy. Just pointing out that you don't get to draw those lines.
 
2013-12-14 05:03:50 AM

Betep: StarChild Academy,

College admission?



The band uniforms are pretty kickass.
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-12-14 05:08:40 AM

Esroc: Reminds me of when I got Pokémon banned from my elementary school. Some douchebag kid went into my backpack and stole my cards. When I went to the principle and pointed out who did it (because he bragged about it to everyone who would listen) instead of making him give me my cards back they gave me detention for causing a disturbance and banned everything Pokémon.

Never even got my cards back and the kid who did it ridiculed me over the fiasco for years.


You could get your revenge now and nobody would suspect you. Just saying.
 
2013-12-14 05:11:42 AM
I remember the days when slap bracelets were banned for being disruptive in our elementary school. Ohoho.

images1.vat19.com

/adjusts her onion
 
2013-12-14 05:14:06 AM

100 Watt Walrus: Monkeyfark Ridiculous: OH MY GOD WHO CARES

If you go to the farking media because your kids can't wear rubber bands to school, you are in dire farking need of something constructive to do.

And everyone involved in actually putting this bullshiat in the paper ought to be ashamed of themselves. As usual.

Pray, do tell us, oh wise one, what is the bar for stupid over-reaches-by-school-administrators to become news. Please provide a chart. Your insights will be invaluable. We'll make sure school admins all over the country get your instructions.

Not saying this is an over-reach. Not saying you're wrong about this not being newsworthy. Just pointing out that you don't get to draw those lines.


If you have an argument that this utter bullshiat is worth going to the media about, let alone publishing, then go ahead and make it. No? Didn't think so. This is some ludicrous mewling and shameful reporting.

I get to draw whatever lines I farking well feel like, if you don't like them you can draw your own.
 
2013-12-14 05:21:29 AM
First it was the head lice, now it's rubber band bracelets. Is nothing acceptable at my child's school?
 
2013-12-14 05:23:18 AM

Monkeyfark Ridiculous: 100 Watt Walrus: Monkeyfark Ridiculous: OH MY GOD WHO CARES

If you go to the farking media because your kids can't wear rubber bands to school, you are in dire farking need of something constructive to do.

And everyone involved in actually putting this bullshiat in the paper ought to be ashamed of themselves. As usual.

Pray, do tell us, oh wise one, what is the bar for stupid over-reaches-by-school-administrators to become news. Please provide a chart. Your insights will be invaluable. We'll make sure school admins all over the country get your instructions.

Not saying this is an over-reach. Not saying you're wrong about this not being newsworthy. Just pointing out that you don't get to draw those lines.

If you have an argument that this utter bullshiat is worth going to the media about, let alone publishing, then go ahead and make it. No? Didn't think so. This is some ludicrous mewling and shameful reporting.

I get to draw whatever lines I farking well feel like, if you don't like them you can draw your own.


So we will, and we'll draw them in places that aren't retarded.
 
2013-12-14 05:29:57 AM

Poowaddins: I remember the days when slap bracelets were banned for being disruptive in our elementary school. Ohoho.

[images1.vat19.com image 500x333]

/adjusts her onion


I'm actually kind of embarrassed to admit to thinking those things were cool back in the day... The hell were we thinking...?

/dag blasted whippersnappers!
 
2013-12-14 05:32:18 AM
When I was a young boy in Florida I went to Madeira Beach Middle school, which had barbed wire fences facing the ocean.

I will repeat that:  Middle school.  Barbed wire fences.  Facing the ocean.

Let that sink in a little.

Now consider that was over 25 years ago.  Now imagine what it must be like today, in a Post 9/11 'Mercia where the TSA sticks a camera up your anus & takes pictures for the internet and people just shrug apathetically about it all.

Nihilism is the new hope.  Maybe in a million years the chimps will do a better job than we did.
 
2013-12-14 05:32:43 AM

LoneWolf343: Monkeyfark Ridiculous: 100 Watt Walrus: Monkeyfark Ridiculous: OH MY GOD WHO CARES

If you go to the farking media because your kids can't wear rubber bands to school, you are in dire farking need of something constructive to do.

And everyone involved in actually putting this bullshiat in the paper ought to be ashamed of themselves. As usual.

Pray, do tell us, oh wise one, what is the bar for stupid over-reaches-by-school-administrators to become news. Please provide a chart. Your insights will be invaluable. We'll make sure school admins all over the country get your instructions.

Not saying this is an over-reach. Not saying you're wrong about this not being newsworthy. Just pointing out that you don't get to draw those lines.

If you have an argument that this utter bullshiat is worth going to the media about, let alone publishing, then go ahead and make it. No? Didn't think so. This is some ludicrous mewling and shameful reporting.

I get to draw whatever lines I farking well feel like, if you don't like them you can draw your own.

So we will, and we'll draw them in places that aren't retarded.



Of course you will. And then maybe your mommy can call the local newspaper about it.
 
2013-12-14 05:33:21 AM
www.tasteofcinema.com

StarChild Academy?

What's the team name? The Fighting Fetuses?
 
2013-12-14 05:36:30 AM
FTFA:  Rainbow Loom bracelets - the colorful craze among the elementary-school set - have been banned from at least two Orange County schools because officials say they are disrupting class.

Has anyone considered the possibility that maybe, just maybe, children aren't supposed to sit chained to desks 4-5 hours every day, doing nothing at all? One of the things I learned at school was that the world inside my head was far more interesting than anything that went on in class. I went through school in a boredom-induced coma.

Spaceman Spiff to the rescue!
 
2013-12-14 05:39:05 AM
Kids keep reinventing stuff like this.   Back in the early 80's when I was in elementary school, there was at least a couple fads.  There has been a constant cycling of this kind of thing with many kids thinking they have some cool thing no one ever thought of before.    Human nature, you have a hard time banning that kind of thing.
 
2013-12-14 05:41:23 AM

Monkeyfark Ridiculous: LoneWolf343: Monkeyfark Ridiculous: 100 Watt Walrus: Monkeyfark Ridiculous: OH MY GOD WHO CARES

If you go to the farking media because your kids can't wear rubber bands to school, you are in dire farking need of something constructive to do.

And everyone involved in actually putting this bullshiat in the paper ought to be ashamed of themselves. As usual.

Pray, do tell us, oh wise one, what is the bar for stupid over-reaches-by-school-administrators to become news. Please provide a chart. Your insights will be invaluable. We'll make sure school admins all over the country get your instructions.

Not saying this is an over-reach. Not saying you're wrong about this not being newsworthy. Just pointing out that you don't get to draw those lines.

If you have an argument that this utter bullshiat is worth going to the media about, let alone publishing, then go ahead and make it. No? Didn't think so. This is some ludicrous mewling and shameful reporting.

I get to draw whatever lines I farking well feel like, if you don't like them you can draw your own.

So we will, and we'll draw them in places that aren't retarded.


Of course you will. And then maybe your mommy can call the local newspaper about it.


It's funny that you're blaming the people who are complaining about being ridiculous but not the people who are being ridiculous. However, since you're saying that it is ridiculous about being ridiculous, and you're complaining about being ridiculous about being ridiculous, that makes you doubly ridiculous, doesn't it?
 
2013-12-14 05:43:28 AM

LoneWolf343: Monkeyfark Ridiculous: LoneWolf343: Monkeyfark Ridiculous: 100 Watt Walrus: Monkeyfark Ridiculous: OH MY GOD WHO CARES

If you go to the farking media because your kids can't wear rubber bands to school, you are in dire farking need of something constructive to do.

And everyone involved in actually putting this bullshiat in the paper ought to be ashamed of themselves. As usual.

Pray, do tell us, oh wise one, what is the bar for stupid over-reaches-by-school-administrators to become news. Please provide a chart. Your insights will be invaluable. We'll make sure school admins all over the country get your instructions.

Not saying this is an over-reach. Not saying you're wrong about this not being newsworthy. Just pointing out that you don't get to draw those lines.

If you have an argument that this utter bullshiat is worth going to the media about, let alone publishing, then go ahead and make it. No? Didn't think so. This is some ludicrous mewling and shameful reporting.

I get to draw whatever lines I farking well feel like, if you don't like them you can draw your own.

So we will, and we'll draw them in places that aren't retarded.


Of course you will. And then maybe your mommy can call the local newspaper about it.

It's funny that you're blaming the people who are complaining about being ridiculous but not the people who are being ridiculous. However, since you're saying that it is ridiculous about being ridiculous, and you're complaining about being ridiculous about being ridiculous, that makes you doubly ridiculous, doesn't it?


No, Monkeyfark Ridiculous.
 
2013-12-14 06:02:05 AM
In the most shocking news I'm sure I'll hear all day : elementary age school children are easily distracted. This discovery will change my whole outlook on nothing.
 
2013-12-14 06:09:40 AM

NephilimNexus: When I was a young boy in Florida I went to Madeira Beach Middle school, which had barbed wire fences facing the ocean.

I will repeat that:  Middle school.  Barbed wire fences.  Facing the ocean.

Let that sink in a little.

Now consider that was over 25 years ago.  Now imagine what it must be like today, in a Post 9/11 'Mercia where the TSA sticks a camera up your anus & takes pictures for the internet and people just shrug apathetically about it all.

Nihilism is the new hope.  Maybe in a million years the chimps will do a better job than we did.


Maybe they were there to keep out the Cubans.
 
2013-12-14 06:25:17 AM

LoneWolf343: It's funny that you're blaming the people who are complaining about being ridiculous but not the people who are being ridiculous. However, since you're saying that it is ridiculous about being ridiculous, and you're complaining about being ridiculous about being ridiculous, that makes you doubly ridiculous, doesn't it?


Just to follow up on this...

I don't think it is ridiculous to tell children not to wear these bracelets.
I don't think it is ridiculous to complain about that rule.
I do think it is ridiculous to alert the media about it.
I do think it is ridiculous to publish a report about it.
I don't think it is ridiculous to talk about it on Fark.

/also, you're complaining about me complaining about the complaining, so...
 
2013-12-14 06:25:22 AM
When I was just a skinny lad on holiday by the sea,
I met a girl in a Rancid shirt, and a tape she gave to me
With the Black Flag First Four Years and the Minor Threat Discography,
And punk rock saved my life.
 
2013-12-14 06:29:10 AM
Are they banning children? Parents bring in an ipad, set it on the floor and the teacher teaches them through crappy choppy skype?

Oh. Rubber bands. Not far enough.
 
2013-12-14 06:33:29 AM

Esroc: Reminds me of when I got Pokémon banned from my elementary school. Some douchebag kid went into my backpack and stole my cards. When I went to the principle and pointed out who did it (because he bragged about it to everyone who would listen) instead of making him give me my cards back they gave me detention for causing a disturbance and banned everything Pokémon.

Never even got my cards back and the kid who did it ridiculed me over the fiasco for years.


Learn to kick someone in the balls you rat.

/you were just an excuse
//"I dropped my charzard card" would have gotten them banned.
 
2013-12-14 06:55:08 AM
Kids latch on to some new, idiotic fad.  Being kids, they proceed to disrupt class with said fad.  Teachers get tired of dealing with it, biatch to administration.  Rather than listen to whining teachers, administration bans fad item, usually three days before children's gnat-like attention span would have resulted in them moving on to the next idiotic thing they will obsess over.

This cycle has probably been repeating itself sine the start of the educational system.  The 24 hour news cycle, and modern entitlement attitude just means it gets more exposure, and that idiot parents will enable their kids' biatching, rather than pointing out that they should be paying more attention in school anyway.
 
2013-12-14 06:59:47 AM
I may or may not have brought a live scorpion to school.
 
2013-12-14 07:06:28 AM
Jelly bracelets?
 
2013-12-14 07:07:00 AM
Her daughters have made bracelets to cheer the University of Florida Gators

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3I0K-ymOTS4

Gator fans..
 
2013-12-14 07:54:38 AM
The little rubber bands are a pain in the butt when you find them all over the floor, and you have to vacuum. And my cat eats them," she said Friday.

She brings her cat to school?
 
2013-12-14 08:47:36 AM
"Children are in the classroom playing with them, having them in their desks, throwing them around the room, exchanging them. They're more than just a bracelet," said Cindy Zimmermann, owner of the StarChild, which has students in kindergarten to grade five.

Thats it! They're a gateway to prostitution and drug dealing!

jlyssens.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-12-14 08:47:37 AM

Monkeyfark Ridiculous: LoneWolf343: Monkeyfark Ridiculous: LoneWolf343: Monkeyfark Ridiculous: 100 Watt Walrus: Monkeyfark Ridiculous: OH MY GOD WHO CARES

If you go to the farking media because your kids can't wear rubber bands to school, you are in dire farking need of something constructive to do.

And everyone involved in actually putting this bullshiat in the paper ought to be ashamed of themselves. As usual.

Pray, do tell us, oh wise one, what is the bar for stupid over-reaches-by-school-administrators to become news. Please provide a chart. Your insights will be invaluable. We'll make sure school admins all over the country get your instructions.

Not saying this is an over-reach. Not saying you're wrong about this not being newsworthy. Just pointing out that you don't get to draw those lines.

If you have an argument that this utter bullshiat is worth going to the media about, let alone publishing, then go ahead and make it. No? Didn't think so. This is some ludicrous mewling and shameful reporting.

I get to draw whatever lines I farking well feel like, if you don't like them you can draw your own.

So we will, and we'll draw them in places that aren't retarded.


Of course you will. And then maybe your mommy can call the local newspaper about it.

It's funny that you're blaming the people who are complaining about being ridiculous but not the people who are being ridiculous. However, since you're saying that it is ridiculous about being ridiculous, and you're complaining about being ridiculous about being ridiculous, that makes you doubly ridiculous, doesn't it?

No, Monkeyfark Ridiculous.


TAA DAA!!!
 
2013-12-14 08:57:05 AM
This is Florida. They're just thinking of the children's safety. Rainbow>>> Skittles, study it out people.
 
2013-12-14 09:52:33 AM
See why my kids have it better being homeschooled?  My daughter is getting one of those looms for Christmas, and her teacher won't be saying a peep about the bracelet being in class.

It would be weird if my wife did ban them, as that would be a little dumber than FL.
 
2013-12-14 11:08:27 AM
They are everywhere. Kids wrap each individual elastic around their fingers until they turn purple. They stretch the bracelets til they break and they have to remake it.

On the plus side, the elastics are too small to be flung.
 
2013-12-14 11:35:22 AM

NephilimNexus: When I was a young boy in Florida I went to Madeira Beach Middle school, which had barbed wire fences facing the ocean.

I will repeat that:  Middle school.  Barbed wire fences.  Facing the ocean.

Let that sink in a little.

Now consider that was over 25 years ago.  Now imagine what it must be like today, in a Post 9/11 'Mercia where the TSA sticks a camera up your anus & takes pictures for the internet and people just shrug apathetically about it all.

Nihilism is the new hope.  Maybe in a million years the chimps will do a better job than we did.


I'd imagine that the reason for that was not so much "keep bad things out of the school yard" as it was "keep the kids from running down to the beach, doing something stupid, and then getting sued by parents" Middle school kids are not known for their good decision making skills, and being hopped up on hormones, the boys in particular are prone to doing really stupid stuff if they think it'll make a girl look at them. Hint: I'll bet the barbed wire was tilted towards the inside of the fence.
 
2013-12-14 11:47:50 AM
When the kids discover masturbation, what will they ban then?
 
2013-12-14 12:05:42 PM
First rule of school: if the students like it: ban it, change, kill it.
 
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