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(CNN)   What's the real reason for the post-pregnancy fitness selfie rage? They make women jealous and feel bad about themselves   (cnn.com) divider line 80
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6334 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Dec 2013 at 10:22 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
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2013-12-12 08:46:17 PM  
8 votes:

Benevolent Misanthrope: It's not post-pregnancy fitness selfies that are causing the rage, you idiots.  It's the post-pregnancy fitness selfies accompanied by a caption on the order of, "Look at me!!!  If you aren't predisposed to lose weight quickly and look like me, you're a fat, lazy cow and I WIN ALL THE THINGS!!!!"


1: all selfies are of the "Look at me!" variety..
2: she has the right to be proud of her body, she is effing hot..
3: she didn't call anybody a fat lazy cow, or boast that she is better than anybody.. did you happen to read her whole "apology" article? the one where she correctly states that we are a fat country and it's bad for our health? the whole thing was about getting people to exercise some and eat better, it was all true, and good advice, but STILL people were crying "this hurts my poor wittle feewings!"
4: you sound fat...
2013-12-12 09:28:29 PM  
7 votes:
I notice that it's almost always actresses, fitness models, and fitness bloggers who end up losing the weight quickly.  If it were my job to be in insanely good shape and I was paid enough so I didn't have to do anything but workout and eat perfectly, I would probably have those abs too.
2013-12-12 09:19:05 PM  
7 votes:

Benevolent Misanthrope: It's not post-pregnancy fitness selfies that are causing the rage, you idiots.  It's the post-pregnancy fitness selfies accompanied by a caption on the order of, "Look at me!!!  If you aren't predisposed to lose weight quickly and look like me, you're a fat, lazy cow and I WIN ALL THE THINGS!!!!"


This is the attitude that causes the rage.
Nobody's fat because they eat too much.  Nobody's fat because they have other priorities competing for time that could be spent exercising.  They're just not predisposed to lose weight quickly.
People who lose weight after pregnancy do so because of their lucky genetics, not because they spend several hours a day in the gym.
Anybody who says otherwise is a horrible feeling-hurting monster.

/ Fit Mom's secret wasn't even so much that she "lost weight quickly" as that she didn't use pregnancy as an excuse to let herself go.  She just didn't gain the weight to begin with.
2013-12-12 08:27:11 PM  
7 votes:
It's not post-pregnancy fitness selfies that are causing the rage, you idiots.  It's the post-pregnancy fitness selfies accompanied by a caption on the order of, "Look at me!!!  If you aren't predisposed to lose weight quickly and look like me, you're a fat, lazy cow and I WIN ALL THE THINGS!!!!"
2013-12-12 11:22:10 PM  
5 votes:

Peki: My fiance and I had a small row over this. Normally, I'm good about clicking pics from Fark or other places for him to *ahem* peruse later. This one I said to no to. He got biatchy about it, until I said this:

"Is that the sort of message you'd want your daughter to get? That the only thing a woman is good for is sex, so who cares that you dropped a 7 pound weight out of your cooch, get back on the treadmill so you can get those abs and look desirable?"

/yes, I'm a feminist. Yes the picture pissed me off. Not because of what it is, but because of the cultural context that surrounds it


Nope, you are NOT a feminist. From one feminist since the 1960s to a wannabe, read a book. Should I post a reading list?  :-/ Seriously, I shouldn't have to. But that's what feminism has become in the 21st century. You can say it, but it ain't true, girl-fren.

And I can't wait for the unwashed masses to say I'm a guy living in his parents' basement. I'm a woman of a "certain age" who has reaped all the benefits of what we struggled for in the 1960s and who worked her ass off for what you have now.  I had high hopes for us, until the Disco age turned us right back into "pretty girls who can shake their booties." Really.

You don't get to say you're a "feminist" until you have made a magnificent life for yourself without a man to prop you up and pay your freight. You don't get to call yourself a "feminist" until you have a 50-50 relationship with a partner. Sitting on your ass, overweight, and making your partner miserable has nothing to do with feminism. That's what we used to call "leeching." And I see so much of this with you younger people, I despair of what we tried to do so long ago.

It's not about being overweight. It's not about getting up in the middle of the night with an infant. It's not about anything but having a true partnership with a man or woman with whom you feel complete.

It's not about having a BrideZilla wedding. It's not about your family. It's not about who is going to take the dog out at 3 a.m. It's not about anything more than respecting your partner and understanding that you have to take care of yourself FOR yourself. Why would you ask your partner to overlook the obvious? That's what feminism is...was... all about.

Why would you think any differently if you claim to be a feminist? Seriously? Is everything we worked for just a catch-all phrase for you to be lazy and relying on a partner for your day-to-day existence?

That's not what I spent my life working for. You should be ashamed. Wake up! Geez Louise!  :-(
2013-12-12 10:45:35 PM  
5 votes:

Peki: My fiance and I had a small row over this. Normally, I'm good about clicking pics from Fark or other places for him to *ahem* peruse later. This one I said to no to. He got biatchy about it, until I said this:

"Is that the sort of message you'd want your daughter to get? That the only thing a woman is good for is sex, so who cares that you dropped a 7 pound weight out of your cooch, get back on the treadmill so you can get those abs and look desirable?"

/yes, I'm a feminist. Yes the picture pissed me off. Not because of what it is, but because of the cultural context that surrounds it


Yeah...what the fark are you on about?

Okay, I'm a guy, but...what are you saying?  That a physically fit woman is only that way because she wants sex?

Did you just call Maria Kang a whore?

Seriously, what the fark???

Just because it needs to be repeated, let's blockquote it:

"There are several things that keep me motivated. Firstly, having a mother who suffered from being overweight, having diabetes and heart disease really made me passionate about seeking holistic solutions to her personal weight problems. I experienced firsthand not only the mental and physical damage being unhealthy does to a person, but I also recognized the discrimination many overweight people faced because of their public image. And I, like everyone else, is susceptible to falling into negative patterns that can cause weight gain. Secondly, I also stay motivated by constantly setting goals: whether it be for a competition, a party, a vacation, a race...anything! I think it's important to keep focused towards an unreachable target whenever you're trying to achieve anything in life."

Wat...I don't know about anyone else, but  fark yesI want my daughters to care about their health.  If a physically attractive woman can do it, then so be it.  Diabetes and heart disease runs in the family, and at 38 I've already fallen victim to one of those.

To hell with Fat Acceptance.  You have a First World Problem disease if you're fat or obese.  Yes, a  disease.  At least a third of the children in the world--what, 600 million?--don't have access to clean water and regular meals, and y'all are biatching because a fitness enthusiast makes you feel bad for eating cookies.

Having said all that...I am a fat, lazy fark.

/brb, going to go lift weights now
2013-12-12 10:37:57 PM  
5 votes:

Benevolent Misanthrope: It's not post-pregnancy fitness selfies that are causing the rage, you idiots.  It's the post-pregnancy fitness selfies accompanied by a caption on the order of, "Look at me!!!  If you aren't predisposed to lose weight quickly and look like me, you're a fat, lazy cow and I WIN ALL THE THINGS!!!!"


Ya pretty much. It also is a massive lack of understanding for people who say "Oh anyone can do that." No, not so much. For one, not everyone has time to spend working out much. Yes, everyone can find time to do a little exercise, 30-60 mins maybe, a day. However they can't spend hours working out. Turns out that if you have a full time job, do a good job as a parent, and keep up a household, you don't have a ton of spare time. The woman that started all this is a "mom and fitness blogger" married to a soccer star. In other words: A stay at home mom who spends her time working out. Great, but don't go telling a teacher that works 8+ hours a day, whose spouse also works, that they should have the same time to spend.

Also genetics really plays a big role. Anyone can lose weight, but some people really do have a much easier time of it. So bragging that you have a easy time of losing weight because you have genetics that allows it is rather silly. It is funny to me how people will easily accept that no matter how hard they work, they can never be a pro athlete because they don't have the genetics, but that they think it only plays on that level. No, it goes all the way down. Some people have an easy time maintaining a healthy weight, some have a really hard time. If you have an easy time, wonderful, but recognize it for what it is. Don't assume it is that easy for everyone.

I have a lot more respect for a working mom who manages to keep herself in reasonable shape, despite having to work a job and spend time being a good parent, than a "fitness blogger" and "instagram star" that can spend large portions of the day working out who looks great.
2013-12-12 10:33:44 PM  
5 votes:
I would guess most pregnant females prioritize their baby over their own attractiveness. Strangers who insist otherwise can suck it.
2013-12-12 10:43:43 PM  
4 votes:
Well, sorry...but there's no reason to pack on 70-80 pounds when you're pregnant. The 30 pounds your doctor "gave" you are plenty. And if you exercise moderately (or even lightly), you'll go back to your pre-pregnancy weight within a year IF you breast feed. Given that most women don't, I am not surprised that a lot of you fathers are stunned and outraged by what your woman has become.

And, ladies, before you get your outrage on, I was one of those who put on too much weight. Took me two years even with the breast feeding to drop the excess weight, but I started working out as soon as I could and got down to an almost normal weight within 4 months, but still overweight. The rest of it was just me being lazy and on maternity leave.

This: just because you had a baby doesn't mean you get to hog out and become Jabba the Hut. The baby doesn't care; your partner does.

Menfolk: amirite?

::shiat::, this was supposed to go on Reddit. Oh well...if I've saved one marriage, I'm happy.  :-)
2013-12-12 09:26:38 PM  
4 votes:

Olo Manolo: Benevolent Misanthrope: It's not post-pregnancy fitness selfies that are causing the rage, you idiots.  It's the post-pregnancy fitness selfies accompanied by a caption on the order of, "Look at me!!!  If you aren't predisposed to lose weight quickly and look like me, you're a fat, lazy cow and I WIN ALL THE THINGS!!!!"

1: all selfies are of the "Look at me!" variety..
2: she has the right to be proud of her body, she is effing hot..
3: she didn't call anybody a fat lazy cow, or boast that she is better than anybody.. did you happen to read her whole "apology" article? the one where she correctly states that we are a fat country and it's bad for our health? the whole thing was about getting people to exercise some and eat better, it was all true, and good advice, but STILL people were crying "this hurts my poor wittle feewings!"
4: you sound fat...


I bet you think you are often misunderstood.
2013-12-12 11:50:22 PM  
3 votes:

Peki: My fiance and I had a small row over this. Normally, I'm good about clicking pics from Fark or other places for him to *ahem* peruse later. This one I said to no to. He got biatchy about it, until I said this:

"Is that the sort of message you'd want your daughter to get? That the only thing a woman is good for is sex, so who cares that you dropped a 7 pound weight out of your cooch, get back on the treadmill so you can get those abs and look desirable?"

/yes, I'm a feminist. Yes the picture pissed me off. Not because of what it is, but because of the cultural context that surrounds it


That poor, poor man.
2013-12-12 11:47:29 PM  
3 votes:
All I have to say about this is that Kim Kardashian is not a good example of a nice post-pregnancy body. She's a fat-assed cow who looks like a partially-melted Bratz doll, despite having a personal trainer and all the money she could need to spend on beauty. Any woman who feels like they need to look like Kim Kardashian should know that many people find her ugly, fat-assed, and unpleasant in every way.

As for the others... Well, this is how women pick on each other. No matter how much pseudo-feminists want to rage about men embracing and endorsing an impossible female body image, the truth is that women do it to each other a lot more, and a with generally vicious intentions. These pictures are not for men; They're posted solely to be completely biatchy to other women... So I can understand the angry reaction.

And I've also lived long enough to know to stay the hell out of it.
2013-12-12 11:06:56 PM  
3 votes:
I am fit and what's more *I* have a phd and they don't. I think all women should have PhDs or MDs. What's THEIR excuse?

Oh, you mean everybody doesn't share MY priorities in life?
2013-12-12 10:30:30 PM  
3 votes:
Should be hard to feel jealous, though, when taken into account all these celebs have ten of thousands of dollars in makeup, teams of makeup artists, and more of a percentile per square inch of air-brushing than a Geiger painting.

I'd love to see Kardashian or Beyonce get those post-pregnancy figures on WIC, food stamps, and the only exercise is chasing baby daddy outta the house to go job hunting and hitting the food pantry every few weeks.
2013-12-12 09:38:41 PM  
3 votes:

Peki: My fiance and I had a small row over this. Normally, I'm good about clicking pics from Fark or other places for him to *ahem* peruse later. This one I said to no to. He got biatchy about it, until I said this:

"Is that the sort of message you'd want your daughter to get? That the only thing a woman is good for is sex, so who cares that you dropped a 7 pound weight out of your cooch, get back on the treadmill so you can get those abs and look desirable?"

/yes, I'm a feminist. Yes the picture pissed me off. Not because of what it is, but because of the cultural context that surrounds it


That's a very strange view of this.  Being fit is important for a lot of reasons that don't involve sex.
And it's important for men to be fit too.
Seriously, of all the conspiracies the patriarchy has perpetrated, engineering Fit Mom has to be one of the most benign.
2013-12-14 02:47:53 AM  
2 votes:
Two moderate workouts a week will keep anyone in shape.

Hardest excecise at the gym is pulling open the front door.
2013-12-13 02:02:36 PM  
2 votes:
I don't know. Maybe people ought to live their own damn lives and stop trying to keep up with the Joneses? It's worked pretty well for me.
2013-12-13 02:19:38 AM  
2 votes:

Peki: Danger Avoid Death: Peki: sendtodave: Second generation feminists teach classes to third generation feminists, and despise them?

She's not second wave. She's a first waver.

So how many waves are there? I wanna know if this is like my sister arguing with my mother or my niece arguing with my grandmother. I gotta know how much popcorn to make.

3 that I know of, but I've been out of academia for a few years now.

1st: Men and women are the same!
2nd: Men and women are different!
3rd: Women and men have similarities and differences. And btw, you both are speaking from white, Western privilege.

/VERY reduced, but that's the jist


I thought it was:

1) Men and women deserve equal rights
2) Men and women are the same
3) Everyone is a special snowflake, and gender shouldn't exist
2013-12-13 12:39:26 AM  
2 votes:

sendtodave: I've read that women don't get all dressed up and sexy looking when going out for their husbands /boyfriends, they do it for other women. Because other women are watching.

My wife told me that this was accurate.

It's all about competition. All the time.



100% truth.
2013-12-13 12:36:14 AM  
2 votes:

DebinCO: Nope, you are NOT a feminist.


Exclusion!  Yes, that's the ticket.  It's working so well for the Republican party, how could it fail feminists?  There could not possibly be any strength in numbers.  Only the weak need sympathizers--in fact, feminists did their best work with the majority of public directly opposing them, right?  Your efforts in this thread to restore those conditions went very well.
2013-12-13 12:34:14 AM  
2 votes:
I just don't get the outrage. To me, the fitness trainer was sending out a challenge to women who want to get in shape and get healthy, but are having trouble finding motivation or are making excuses that they know are just excuses. If that's not an immediate goal of yours, why are you even paying attention? I'm 18 weeks pregnant with my first and I'm holding Maria Kang as a role model. I don't want to go down the road other members of my family have gone down and still be fighting my baby weight 20 years after my daughter is born, which sounds like what she was doing. Looking at her makes me feel optimistic that that's a lifelong battle I won't have to face. If you look at her and feel anger and outrage, that says more about your issues than hers.
2013-12-13 12:33:26 AM  
2 votes:

Peki: What? You don't feel a little self-conscious every time a successful looking guy driving your dream car comes on TV? You don't feel that pull, that social gaze, judging you, telling you that you aren't good enough? You don't see the muscular, trim dudes, then look in the mirror and not feel a little down?

Guys, quit acting like peer pressure doesn't work on you too.


No. We don't feel that. We know you can't fathom this, and it is because all of you are farking insane. That is seriously the most ridiculous thing I have read today. Never attempt to speak for men again. That was terrible.
2013-12-13 12:21:56 AM  
2 votes:
Hearing "What's your excuse for being fat?" from the wife of a soccer star who can spend the day at home working out sounds pretty much exactly like Mitt Romney telling the poor that they need to get an education or start a business by borrowing money from their parents. There's just a massive amount of ignorance that comes off as smugness, or vice versa, that ignores the reality a lot of people face. That kind of inconsiderate attitude can most definitely draw anger, but there's just enough truth behind the comment to be defensible.
That said, shaming is never a good motivator, whether it be shaming the viewer directly or shaming their actions, it's still a negative form of encouragement. There are better ways that could have been phrased that wouldn't have provoked anywhere near as much ire.
2013-12-13 12:04:37 AM  
2 votes:

Peki: Laobaojun: Were you trolling or serious?

Sort of. It was my minor. My major was English. Lots of cross over though, so I probably could have double-majored if I'd wanted to. *shrug*

And yeah. Lots of reading. Lots and lots of reading.

/Butler, Wittig, Feinstein, Iriguary, Kessler, and classics like Steinem, MacKinnon and Daly


Nice! You know how to use The Google!  LOL

May I suggest some women writers from the 19th century? You'd be surprised. But you do "lots and lots of reading." Heh. Nope, not giving you a reading list. And I've got a Ph.D. Saw a LOT of you young, oh-so-serious women in my classes, to my everlasting despair. :-/

"Lots and lots of reading." So how did that translate to you being a "feminist" in the post-20th century? If you were even born then?

I suspect that, at usual, 99% of those who claim feminist "credentials" are those who read "Lots and lots." And never understood the driving force behind what we stood for, at our own peril, who challenged the status quo and made a very small change in our society.

Seriously, what have you done, as a "feminist," to change society?

Oh. I see. Nothing. And since this was about women getting fat during and after childbirth....many are claiming "OMG, I have a thyroid problem (which 90% of women DO NOT HAVE)" I guess we must part company here and I'll go grade some papers.

And my partner, who is looking over my shoulder, just said, "Why do you even try?"

I looked back at him and said, "If not me, who else?"

Do not trust the Google. If you are serious about "Womyn's" studies, let me know and I'll send you some links. But I've got a class of 30 who needs my attention, and you're just a phantom on the 'Tubes, a phantom who doesn't give us feminists a good name.

Back to the topic:

If you get fat, and blame it on the baby, you don't get to call yourself a feminist. You should care more about your body. And your partner. And the baby. That is all.
2013-12-13 12:01:29 AM  
2 votes:
Guys, quit acting like peer pressure doesn't work on you too.

Yes, peer pressure works on us - but we recognize that those feelings of inadequacy are our own problem, not Ryan Goslings, and so we don't go around complaining about it.

If people make you feel bad, it doesn't necessarily mean they Did something bad.

Maybe the reason that they made you feel bad was because of you...  So if the problem's yours, then you should be complaining to yourself (improving yourself, resetting your values, etc.etc.), not complaining about other people.
2013-12-12 11:35:45 PM  
2 votes:

Peki: sendtodave: Peki: DebinCO:

I don't need a reading list. I've got my degree in Women's Studies.

The rest of your post is not worth responding to.

Interesting.

An actual foot soldier in the feminist movement, versus a modern, academic feminist.

Not really a versus. We should have the same goals. I just don't see this as empowering women, I see it as perpetuating the same old structures.

/reading up on 1st, 2nd, and 3rd wave feminism would help here


K. why not.

"Proponents of third-wave feminism claim that it allows women to define feminism for themselves by incorporating their own identities into the belief system of what feminism is and what it can become through one's own perspective. In the introduction to the idea of third-wave feminism in Manifesta, authors Jennifer Baumgardner and Amy Richards suggest that feminism can change with every generation and individual"

What the farking fark?

"Some third-wave feminists prefer not to call themselves feminists, as the word feminist can be misinterpreted as insensitive to the fluid notion of gender and the potential oppressions inherent in all gender roles, or perhaps misconstrued as exclusive or elitist by critics.[citation needed] Others have kept and redefined the term to include these ideas.[citation needed] Third-wave feminism seeks to challenge any universal definition of femininity."

Oh, you've got to be kidding me.

From what I know of 60 feminism, they fought for real change, equality.

This new stuff seems like feel-good, all inclusive pablum.
2013-12-12 11:06:37 PM  
2 votes:

Peki: Everyone missed that my original problem was with my fiance wanting to dl it as a porn pic


That isn't porn.  Unless there is another picture you are referring to.
2013-12-12 10:50:40 PM  
2 votes:
Fatties are going to hate...........oh, and eat ice cream.
2013-12-12 10:48:10 PM  
2 votes:

Anne.Uumellmahaye: This is the first time I've ever seen this image, I'm sorry that I feel no rage for you to be outraged about.

I also don't think it tells women to plop a kid out and immediately head for the treadmill so they can be sexy again. That's not a particularly sexy picture. She's hot, but she's also surrounded by toddlers. Get fit to be fit. If it makes you feel sexy, well then bonus. If you feel unsexy because you're not fit, either work on your physical fitness or work on your mental fitness. Either way, that's your issue, not hers.


This too.
As a guy who is fighting genetics, I sympathize, but surrender is lame.  Fit is sexy, but fit is also fit.  I have never heard of someone who was fit, but didn't feel sexy. Anorexic is not fit, and low BMI with no muscle tone is not fit, and it really does not take that much time out of your week to stay fit.
If this photo made you feel bad, get off your butt, cut the portions down, and stop feeling unfit.
2013-12-12 10:35:55 PM  
2 votes:
Olo Manolo: Benevolent Misanthrope: It's not post-pregnancy fitness selfies that are causing the rage, you idiots.  It's the post-pregnancy fitness selfies accompanied by a caption on the order of, "Look at me!!!  If you aren't predisposed to lose weight quickly and look like me, you're a fat, lazy cow and I WIN ALL THE THINGS!!!!"

1: all selfies are of the "Look at me!" variety..
2: she has the right to be proud of her body, she is effing hot..
3: she didn't call anybody a fat lazy cow, or boast that she is better than anybody.. did you happen to read her whole "apology" article? the one where she correctly states that we are a fat country and it's bad for our health? the whole thing was about getting people to exercise some and eat better, it was all true, and good advice, but STILL people were crying "this hurts my poor wittle feewings!"
4: you sound fat...


This.
What she said was "What's your excuse?"  Given that one of the top three reasons that Americans 17-25 are unfit for military service is obesity, she's right.  So what is your excuse?
2013-12-12 09:41:24 PM  
2 votes:

Peki: My fiance and I had a small row over this. Normally, I'm good about clicking pics from Fark or other places for him to *ahem* peruse later. This one I said to no to. He got biatchy about it, until I said this:

"Is that the sort of message you'd want your daughter to get? That the only thing a woman is good for is sex, so who cares that you dropped a 7 pound weight out of your cooch, get back on the treadmill so you can get those abs and look desirable?"

/yes, I'm a feminist. Yes the picture pissed me off. Not because of what it is, but because of the cultural context that surrounds it


Who do you think is most often placing value on a woman's sex appeal -men or women?  In this example the woman clearly has attributed her value to her sex appeal.
2013-12-12 09:32:07 PM  
2 votes:
My fiance and I had a small row over this. Normally, I'm good about clicking pics from Fark or other places for him to *ahem* peruse later. This one I said to no to. He got biatchy about it, until I said this:

"Is that the sort of message you'd want your daughter to get? That the only thing a woman is good for is sex, so who cares that you dropped a 7 pound weight out of your cooch, get back on the treadmill so you can get those abs and look desirable?"

/yes, I'm a feminist. Yes the picture pissed me off. Not because of what it is, but because of the cultural context that surrounds it
2013-12-13 02:21:44 PM  
1 votes:

Peki: DebinCO:

I don't need a reading list. I've got my degree in Women's Studies.


Now that's comedy.
2013-12-13 12:25:39 PM  
1 votes:

voristrupp: This magical thing? It's called WILLPOWER. See, when I'm not pregnant I eat less, breastfeed, take my kids to the scary, scary outdoors, and even... Are you ready for this? MAKE FOOD THAT DOESNT INVOLVE A MICROWAVE OR A DRIVE THRU. It's a scary concept, I know. And blah blah blah to the "I'm so busy" bs-ers. Take the stairs. Pack a healthy lunch. Stop drinking soda (diet included). Make healthy dinner in a crockpot. Quit with the excuses.

Lots of us do all of the above and we don't look like Ms. Kang. Do you look like Ms Kang? No? Then what's your excuse?


That post really should have included some actual working out instead of just "take the stairs".  I've seen too many people who consider that a legitimate excuse for exercise.
My ex girlfriend slowly transitioned into one of those during the course of our relationship.  The last straw was that she got a pedometer and would brag about how far she walked during the normal course of her day.  Two whole miles, wow!

/ Also, "going to the gym" does not mean walking on the elliptical for 15 minutes, then doing 5-10 reps on the biceps machine at a low weight.  Most people who "do all the same things fit people do but still can't lose weight" aren't actually paying attention to what fit people do.
2013-12-13 11:35:57 AM  
1 votes:

rzrwiresunrise: First, it does seem a little strange that so much emphasis would be put on getting back into mating form ASAP once she's squeezed out a pup. I mean, unless she's in tight competition with other females for her mate, or for another potential mate.

Second, it seems as tho there's a very narrow definition of healthy at work here, one that only depends on fitness. Fit and healthy aren't always equivalent; in fact, they can be at odds more often than not. As fit as a lot of elite athletes may be, I'd be hesitant to call them healthy, especially given the myriad injuries that accompany performance at those levels. Additionally, there's plenty of anecdotal evidence of people who are quite fit... and suffering from heart attacks, strokes, etc.

Last, I wonder if there's a skewed perception of what body fat percentages look like in real terms. This is a good article that provides pics and explanations for the various ranges. It's surprising wrt what we imagine looks fit.

Sample:

[www.builtlean.com image 400x273]



This this farking this.  Women think they're judged, men are judged on a much tougher scale.  This needs a survey thread.  For me the doable range for women is 20-40, with 30 being the ideal.  What the doable range for men (according to craigslist women and Farkettes) is 10-20, with 10 being the ideal.
2013-12-13 10:37:16 AM  
1 votes:

Peki: My fiance and I had a small row over this. Normally, I'm good about clicking pics from Fark or other places for him to *ahem* peruse later. This one I said to no to. He got biatchy about it, until I said this:

"Is that the sort of message you'd want your daughter to get? That the only thing a woman is good for is sex, so who cares that you dropped a 7 pound weight out of your cooch, get back on the treadmill so you can get those abs and look desirable?"

/yes, I'm a feminist. Yes the picture pissed me off. Not because of what it is, but because of the cultural context that surrounds it


As opposed to the cultural context of its ok to be a fat cow and use every excuse you can to justify it and make others accept it?


We have an obesity problem in this (and many other countries) and it seems the way we are going to deal with it is to normalize it and make it acceptable.

We have to many people in this country (men and women) sitting on the coach with a quart of Haagen-Dazs and a bag of Oreos listening to the view or Oprah pushing body acceptance.  The pregnant, big boned , metabolically challenged, depressed excuses are just excuses and don't fly.

We have at least 30% of this country of 300 million plus people with weight problems and no system be it Obamacare, Canadian or whatever is going to be able to afford to pay for the consequences of it.
2013-12-13 10:20:44 AM  
1 votes:

Peki: Frederick: Who do you think is most often placing value on a woman's sex appeal -men or women?  In this example the woman clearly has attributed her value to her sex appeal.

Chicken and egg question. They perpetuate it equally, and I don't really care who started it.



I go to the gym 5 days a week and I like how it makes me look. It makes me feel confident and I do it for me, not my wife.

Who are you to tell me that I should feel guilty about trying to make myself look fit and be healthy?

Your twisted, self-loathing doesn't define my self-image and I reject your belief that it is supposed to.
2013-12-13 09:33:22 AM  
1 votes:
I just don't get people. I really, really don't.

This woman worked for her body. She reaped what she sowed. So yes, "what's your excuse?". American women seem to have pages and pages of them. My own sister, very obese, had been to tons of drs to get her thyroid tested because we have thyroid problems in the family, all drs told her her thyroid is fine, she's obese because of an extremely poor diet, but she still shopped drs until she found one that gave her thyroid meds JUST so she'd have an excuse. She still eats 5,000 calories or more a day, but "it's her thyroid".

When I'm pregnant I eat whatever the fark I want because eff you I'm pregnant, uncomfortable and good makes me happy. I gain on average 40 lbs. when I'm not pregnant I have a herd of children to taxi around, feed, and keep from being too traumatized lest their sense-of-humor-building dysfunction turn into something more severe like mental illness. I also have a fat husband. And, as already mentioned, genetic predisposition to being a fatty mcbutterpants.

But... BUT... I also have this amazing thing that apparently sold out of American shelves in 1985 and was immediately replaced by a book entitled "10,001 reasons why it's not your fault you're fat! -written and illustrated by Ronald McDonald"

This magical thing? It's called WILLPOWER. See, when I'm not pregnant I eat less, breastfeed, take my kids to the scary, scary outdoors, and even... Are you ready for this? MAKE FOOD THAT DOESNT INVOLVE A MICROWAVE OR A DRIVE THRU. It's a scary concept, I know. And blah blah blah to the "I'm so busy" bs-ers. Take the stairs. Pack a healthy lunch. Stop drinking soda (diet included). Make healthy dinner in a crockpot. Quit with the excuses.

I'm on crotchspawn #4 right now, 33 weeks baked, soothing my pregnancy woes with everything nabisco has ever injected lard into (read: Oreos). Why don't I look like fitness mom right now? Too lazy. My choice. My body is my responsibility. Next year at this time I hope to be back down to my pre-pregnancy 120lbs. But if im not? I'll just find someone else to blame. It's the American way!

You'll have to excuse typos, I'm on my autocorrect-obsessive phone.
2013-12-13 08:40:38 AM  
1 votes:

rzrwiresunrise: First, it does seem a little strange that so much emphasis would be put on getting back into mating form ASAP once she's squeezed out a pup. I mean, unless she's in tight competition with other females for her mate, or for another potential mate.


For the gal ITFA, she IS in tight competition with other females for her mate.  She's got three kids and has a lot to do, a less than fully participating male might have extra time for an extra woman in that instance.

Her husband is wealthy, recognizable, and has status.  There are TONS of women that would put great effort into taking him away. He may even be very attractive.

Those women, are the ones getting pissed at her. She just killed not only their options, but also fantasies of finding some guy with money/fame/looks with a fat wife to take from the fat wife.

Nothing motivates women more than competing with other women.

/I gotta figure out how to leverage that....
2013-12-13 02:49:59 AM  
1 votes:

Quinsisdos: Peki: And I AM disenfranchised among my own sisterhood. Comes with being transgendered. *shrug*

This seems paradoxical to me.

Then again, "academic feminist" is usually the nicest way of saying "transphobic sack of shiat" in my personal lexicon.

/Trans
//Ex-Feminist


LOL. That wasn't my experience. There was way more heterophobia than issues with trans folk. I actually got asked by my professor never to use the word "blowjob" in class because it made the other women uncomfortable. The prof was cool, so when I looked at her weird she went, I know I know, school regs, I have to say something.

I just call myself a feminist. You can add whatever label you want to that.

/more interested in true reproductive choice, for example, not just the right to choose an abortion, but the right to have a child and NOT have it effect your economic status
//having a child is the greatest predictor of bankruptcy in the U.S. That's just stupid. (Source: Elizabeth Warren, Two-Income Trap, yes THAT Elizabeth Warren)
2013-12-13 02:45:19 AM  
1 votes:

Peki: And I AM disenfranchised among my own sisterhood. Comes with being transgendered. *shrug*


This seems paradoxical to me.

Then again, "academic feminist" is usually the nicest way of saying "transphobic sack of shiat" in my personal lexicon.

/Trans
//Ex-Feminist
2013-12-13 02:28:19 AM  
1 votes:
Oh myyyy. We're transgendered now, are we? OK. I'm done here.

But now I know my waiting three years for a university tenure-track position was well spent instead of taking the easy out at a "Community College."

NTTAWWT.

However, if indeed you have been dis-enfranchised by your own sisterhood, Peki, perhaps you need to look at why. It may have nothing to do with you being "transgendered," nor does that "fact" forgive your previous posts about those of us who were on the forefront of real feminism and the OPs view that we, as women (transgendered or not) can't stand post-pregnant skinny women, which is what this was all about, right?

My advice to you is to start auditing some classes at a real university to see what you've missed. You can even do this on-line if you can't leave your kids and hubby at home.

I didn't spend 40 years of my life trying to balance feminism with body image (at a very basic level) to make "nice" with anonymous people on the internet. It's as ridiculous as saying President Obama is a Kenyan and was never eligible to be President. It's that stupid.

I've spent all my life in academia...I treasure the women in my classes because I know I'm making a difference.

All names will be redacted for next semester's courses!  :-)

Tah, and to all a goodnight.
2013-12-13 02:17:53 AM  
1 votes:

Danger Avoid Death: Peki: sendtodave: Second generation feminists teach classes to third generation feminists, and despise them?

She's not second wave. She's a first waver.

So how many waves are there? I wanna know if this is like my sister arguing with my mother or my niece arguing with my grandmother. I gotta know how much popcorn to make.


3 that I know of, but I've been out of academia for a few years now.

1st: Men and women are the same!
2nd: Men and women are different!
3rd: Women and men have similarities and differences. And btw, you both are speaking from white, Western privilege.

/VERY reduced, but that's the jist
2013-12-13 02:06:52 AM  
1 votes:

DebinCO: Peki: DebinCO: American politics

Considering it's where feminism started. . . And you're the one griping about history.

You're probably still pissed about the lesbian menace take-over in the 80s.

Wow, nice. Go for the low blow. What if I AM a lesbian? You just negated everything you wrote above, proving my point about pseudo-feminists in the 21st century. Well done, "sister." Your true colors just shone through loud and clear. How does it feel to be dis-enfranchised among your own sisterhood?

This is going to be a panel discussion at my university classes next semester. Thanks for the fodder!  :-) I couldn't have done it without you!


Oh, this is something.

Second generation feminists teach classes to third generation feminists, and despise them?

.... It's so beautiful!
2013-12-13 02:06:27 AM  
1 votes:

DebinCO: Peki: DebinCO: American politics

Considering it's where feminism started. . . And you're the one griping about history.

You're probably still pissed about the lesbian menace take-over in the 80s.

Wow, nice. Go for the low blow. What if I AM a lesbian? You just negated everything you wrote above, proving my point about pseudo-feminists in the 21st century. Well done, "sister." Your true colors just shone through loud and clear. How does it feel to be dis-enfranchised among your own sisterhood?

This is going to be a panel discussion at my university classes next semester. Thanks for the fodder!  :-) I couldn't have done it without you!


I didn't say anything about you being a lesbian. There were plenty of lesbians who were pissed off at what happened, just like there are plenty of gay folks who were against equal marriage. I just said you were still pissed about it.

And I AM disenfranchised among my own sisterhood. Comes with being transgendered. *shrug*
2013-12-13 02:02:11 AM  
1 votes:

Peki: DebinCO: American politics

Considering it's where feminism started. . . And you're the one griping about history.

You're probably still pissed about the lesbian menace take-over in the 80s.


Wow, nice. Go for the low blow. What if I AM a lesbian? You just negated everything you wrote above, proving my point about pseudo-feminists in the 21st century. Well done, "sister." Your true colors just shone through loud and clear. How does it feel to be dis-enfranchised among your own sisterhood?

This is going to be a panel discussion at my university classes next semester. Thanks for the fodder!  :-) I couldn't have done it without you!
2013-12-13 01:39:35 AM  
1 votes:

Catlike Typist: DebinCO: Nope, you are NOT a feminist.

Exclusion!  Yes, that's the ticket.  It's working so well for the Republican party, how could it fail feminists?  There could not possibly be any strength in numbers.  Only the weak need sympathizers--in fact, feminists did their best work with the majority of public directly opposing them, right?  Your efforts in this thread to restore those conditions went very well.


::sigh:: Because what YOU call "feminists" are nothing more than window dressing. All storm and no thunder. All for naught. Because real feminism doesn't exist anymore. We've beaten the men into the ground and we women are so full of self-hate (the original post re: post-pregnancy "selfies") that we are doomed until we finally figure out that we are all human beings, and nothing more. I'm sorry for your take on my post(s) but I suspect you were born in the 1980s. It proves my thesis. That makes me very sad.  :-(

And bringing American politics to a discussion on feminism proves that you don't read; don't parse; and don't do any original thinking except what you hear on the Internets or from your self-absorbed so-called "feminist" friends. Gah.

It's almost like we've gone back to the Eisenhower era, except we don't have to (unless we WANT to) wear pearls while we're cooking.

You and your ilk have destroyed the good work(s) that Betty, Bella, and Simone did...how do you reconcile that? Seriously asking. Not expecting a thoughtful answer but that would be OK if you can Google it together.

My post had NOTHING to do with what you call "exclusion." Nor shaming.

This is what men hate about us...and sometimes I agree with them, sad to say. Your post does us no favors...only reinforces the stereotypes.

Get back to me when you're 60. Then we'll have something to talk about. Until then, you might want to rethink what you just posted.  :-/
2013-12-13 01:36:41 AM  
1 votes:

pushcart: Bumblefark: pushcart: Women with extra weight are hot. Biological determinism wires men to find them so. Look at ancient fertility figurines. Their shape signals fecundity and stimulates the male urge to procreate.

/gotta get me some of that sweet, sweet fecundity...

Snert and snert again! I tip my hat to you, but I am afraid I must dismiss the reductio ad absurdum on the right.


Heh. Fair enough. Actually, I don't entirely disagree. But, with some caveats...

I think cultures in different stages of advancement tend to emphasize different aspects of the female form, in constructing their representations of "beauty." That doesn't make any one representation more or less "natural" than any other -- just a better cultural fit.

And, just as it would be a mistake to look at Barbie dolls as an empirically accurate representation of what men find attractive in the everyday world, I think you'd be mistaken to assume that earlier men actually lusted after women shaped like those fertility fetish figures. It's a caricature of a selectively focused ideal, nothing more. In the real world, it would be regarded as strange and grotesque.

images.forbes.com
2013-12-13 12:47:52 AM  
1 votes:

Peki: sendtodave: People tend to put value on what they are good at. Some people are good at looking good. They shouldn't value that? That shouldn't be an important part of their self identity?

Those are called models, and they have something called photoshop.

This picture? It ignores the social structures behind the woman that allow her to have that body.

LadyHawke: I notice that it's almost always actresses, fitness models, and fitness bloggers who end up losing the weight quickly.  If it were my job to be in insanely good shape and I was paid enough so I didn't have to do anything but workout and eat perfectly, I would probably have those abs too.

This touches on it.

theMightyRegeya: All right, so it's a second response, but I felt the need to add something on top of questioning why physically fit==whore (or something.)

I don't think physical fitness = whore. I think a selfie of your ultrafit body four days after birth (that you KNOW other women can't have)   = AW who knows she's destroying other women's self-esteem.


Ah, I think I understand feminism now. If someone does something you think you can't do, they are horrible people who should hide in their basement out of sight.

This is is why third wave feminism is a crock of shiat. The first wave fought for basic human rights. The second wave fought for equality and parity with men. The third wave fights so that no one ever gets their fee-fees hurt by seeing someone more successful than them.

By that logic, how dare people wear clothes that I can't afford, or drive cars in public that I can't afford. How dare anyone be better than me in public? Oh, and don't get me started on pro athletes. It's so not fair that they flaunt their years of rigorous training on tv? No one should be allowed to be better than anyone else, we should all be fat, lazy, unaccomplished apathetic slobs, lest someone feel bad about something.
2013-12-13 12:47:30 AM  
1 votes:

sendtodave: Occam's Disposable Razor: sendtodave: Women's self esteem is based on how another woman looks?

Absolutely.

That doesn't makes sense.


You're trying to jam logic into a space where it doesn't fit, friend.
2013-12-13 12:42:49 AM  
1 votes:

Frederick: sendtodave: Frederick: Peki: sendtodave: Peki: Frederick: Who do you think is most often placing value on a woman's sex appeal -men or women?  In this example the woman clearly has attributed her value to her sex appeal.

Chicken and egg question. They perpetuate it equally, and I don't really care who started it.

Being attractive is bad, and anyone who disagrees is bad.

Huh.

What? How in the heck do you get that from what I've said?

Funny.  I was going to say the exact same thing.

Being attractive is not bad.  Placing your self worth (or value) on being attractive is bad; is the point I'm trying to make.

... Why is that?

People tend to put value on what they are good at. Some people are good at looking good. They shouldn't value that? That shouldn't be an important part of their self identity?

I feel confident that if you dont understand, there is no way I can explain it to you so that you will.  I can only hope you are not in the psychology or counseling fields.

/genetics are not things people are "good at"
//self identity =/= self value


Being good at something is about results.

How you achieve this results doesn't matter.

Peoples don't get disqualified from races because they were born being able to run fast, no darn it, that isn't fair!

In fact, we frown on performance enhancing drugs because they aren't "natural." Being born able to run fast? Not cheating. Using drugs to run fast?Cheating.

We value natural ability, natural beauty, etc. all the time.
2013-12-13 12:32:50 AM  
1 votes:

ZeroCorpse: Frankly, I don't understand why that isn't all that matters to the women who take these show-off pics. Clearly, they're trying to piss people off, because I can't imagine they're trying to get other men interested in them since they're supposedly happily married. The only answer is that they're doing it to be biatchy. They're doing it to run their "awesome life" in the faces of other people... And that's biatchy.


Yes. And so the winning move (if you run into one of these people in person) is to simply refuse to play.  Change the subject every time.

The true narcissists will get really pissed off when you do that, which is hilarious.

If it's images in advertising putting you in a bad mood, just learn to read less ads.
2013-12-13 12:26:54 AM  
1 votes:

DrewCurtisJr: ZeroCorpse: These pictures are not for men; They're posted solely to be completely biatchy to other women... So I can understand the angry reaction.

And I've also lived long enough to know to stay the hell out of it.

It may not be out of biatchyness. You say you lived long enough to stay out of it, so lets assume you are over 25. How many guys have used the excuse of getting older to let themselves get out of shape? What if a guy who was 45 and in great shape posted a picture on a social media site and said I'm 47 what's your excuse? A 39 year old may find that motivating and decide that it is time to stop making excuses and get in shape.


I'm in my 40s. I'm not fat, but I'll never be built like Hugh Jackman. I accept that. I wish I could be rid of my spare tire, but it's not bad, all things considered, and my girl is supportive and thinks I'm attractive, so as long as she's happy, I can live with how I look.

And that's what it really comes down to. If someone is post-pregnancy, then I assume they're probably partnered already, and they're probably with someone who loves them. While it's nice to try to look good for your significant other, you also have to keep things in perspective: If they're happy with you (happy enough to raise kids with you) then who are you trying to impress with sexy pictures, or the desire to live up to other peoples' sexy pictures?

I contend that the people who make this a big deal are generally kind of vapid and self-absorbed. This is a Type-A personality sort of thing. This is narcissism. This does not affect me.

I'm not in competition with other guys. I have the love of my life, and she's happy with me the way I am. That is all that matter to me.

Frankly, I don't understand why that isn't all that matters to the women who take these show-off pics. Clearly, they're trying to piss people off, because I can't imagine they're trying to get other men interested in them since they're supposedly happily married. The only answer is that they're doing it to be biatchy. They're doing it to run their "awesome life" in the faces of other people... And that's biatchy.
2013-12-13 12:16:49 AM  
1 votes:
"They make women jealous and feel bad about themselves"

... umm, that's the reason women do everything.
2013-12-13 12:03:14 AM  
1 votes:
Women aren't supposed to look attractive after they've given birth.

As far as nature is concerned, the good looks have done their job.  These are now be jettisoned in favor of a body more suitable for decades of sustained hard work raising kids.

/ by sucking the life out of their husbands.
2013-12-13 12:01:55 AM  
1 votes:

pushcart: Women with extra weight are hot. Biological determinism wires men to find them so. Look at ancient fertility figurines. Their shape signals fecundity and stimulates the male urge to procreate.


The countries with the highest brith rates disagree.
2013-12-13 12:00:22 AM  
1 votes:

Enemabag Jones: How about shutting the fark up and dealing with the situation.

If you want washboard abs work for it, if you are happy with your life as it is then you don't need to have a dialog about not having a perfect body.

Last time I checked most men don't have to have an article about self-acceptance that they are not wealthy and powerful.  But [some women] need to have self-affirmations that they are ok without the perfect body.

If you want it work for it, if you don't deal with life as it is.


So much this. If seeing someone who is fit makes you feel bad about being fat, then get off your ass and do something about it. If you can accept your fatness and are comfortable with yourself, then good for you. Seeing a fit person won't make you feel bad. Work to overcome your flaws and insecurities, or accept them. Don't make excuses.

Which brings me to irony of all these people making excuses for their fatness in response to a poster asking "What's your excuse?" The poster isn't supposed to shame your fat. It's shaming your excuses. Sure, genetics allow her to be smoking hot after having kids, but if she can be that fit, you can at least reach the point of being "healthy."
2013-12-12 11:58:42 PM  
1 votes:

UGGOS DO NOT DESERVE AN APOLOGY FROM THEIR BETTERS

2013-12-12 11:50:47 PM  
1 votes:

Enemabag Jones: How about shutting the fark up and dealing with the situation.

If you want washboard abs work for it, if you are happy with your life as it is then you don't need to have a dialog about not having a perfect body.

Last time I checked most men don't have to have an article about self-acceptance that they are not wealthy and powerful.  But [some women] need to have self-affirmations that they are ok without the perfect body.

If you want it work for it, if you don't deal with life as it is.


Favorited...
2013-12-12 11:44:11 PM  
1 votes:
sendtodave
K. why not.
"Proponents of third-wave feminism claim that it allows women to define feminism for themselves by incorporating their own identities into the belief system of what feminism is and what it can become through one's own perspective. In the introduction to the idea of third-wave feminism in Manifesta, authors Jennifer Baumgardner and Amy Richards suggest that feminism can change with every generation and individual"
What the farking fark?
"Some third-wave feminists prefer not to call themselves feminists, as the word feminist can be misinterpreted as insensitive to the fluid notion of gender and the potential oppressions inherent in all gender roles, or perhaps misconstrued as exclusive or elitist by critics.[citation needed] Others have kept and redefined the term to include these ideas.[citation needed] Third-wave feminism seeks to challenge any universal definition of femininity."
Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
From what I know of 60 feminism, they fought for real change, equality.
This new stuff seems like feel-good, all inclusive pablum.


I think it is that many of the goals of second wave feminism [in western culture] have or will be reached within a this or the next generation and the only way to find things to be angry about to is complain about 20 year old games from a Japanese company.

So instead of going for gender equality and give of some of the good things that went with some of the bad things, find something to be angry about.
2013-12-12 11:38:17 PM  
1 votes:
www.capitalbay.comWelp, guess I'll start.

Formatting's farked, I know. Know what else I know? Drunk and don't care.

i.perezhilton.com

/I don't even care if that woman in the second image had crotchfruit
//Going with GIS
2013-12-12 11:35:47 PM  
1 votes:

voristrupp: There are phds with bad genes, aspergers (academia is full of them), adhd, dyslexia.

All excuses.


What!? How dare you degree shame me!
2013-12-12 11:26:50 PM  
1 votes:

Peki: DebinCO:

I don't need a reading list. I've got my degree in Women's Studies.

The rest of your post is not worth responding to.


Interesting.

An actual foot soldier in the feminist movement, versus a modern, academic feminist.
2013-12-12 11:25:27 PM  
1 votes:
Fwiw I respect them for their accomplishments.

But while being fit is a huge priority for me - one I am teaching my daughters,must be part of an overall lifestyle- investing the time and effort to be AS FIT AS HER is NOT my overarching priority.

I don't expect HER to invest all her time to publish several peer reviewed papers every year. I don't expect HER to get a patent or do 5 patient care volunteer visits to hospice patients per week.

I guess we all have some priorities qnd achievements,she never will so we should plaster ourselves and tag her on social media asking what her excuse is for not achieving enough. It would be motivational, right?
2013-12-12 11:13:23 PM  
1 votes:

TastyEloi: sendtodave:
Was that a no? People really shouldn't be proud of looking sexy?

You can only really legitimately be proud of something that you've achieved by virtue of your own effort. So if you have a good-looking face, you really can't be proud of that--you simply won the genetic lottery. But a fit, sexy body may be the result of a lot of hard work. The problem with this is even the result you get from exercise has a certain genetic component to it, so some people may never be able develop their bodies in certain ways, no matter how much or hard they exercise.


So, intelligent people shouldn't be proud of their intelligence, ambitious people shouldn't be proud of their ambition, friendly people shouldn't be proud of their ability to make friends....

Unless they worked real hard?

We should only be proud of our dump stats?
2013-12-12 11:13:22 PM  
1 votes:
One of these women if not both was actually a beauty queen to begin with, who could never quite nake it all the eay at the national level.


So i doubt it's just about being fit. It is about her marketing herself and implying (albeit with plausible deniability) that others who dont have the beauty queen look have failed in some way and,are making excuses.

It was also a dumb business move, because i doubt she got the intended effect of het attention whoring endeavors. If i was looking for a trainer, she wouldnt be someone i would feel very motivated by (and i do cardio bootcamp and bikram yoga with some real bad asses. )
2013-12-12 11:12:03 PM  
1 votes:

Anne.Uumellmahaye: This is the first time I've ever seen this image, I'm sorry that I feel no rage for you to be outraged about.

I also don't think it tells women to plop a kid out and immediately head for the treadmill so they can be sexy again. That's not a particularly sexy picture. She's hot, but she's also surrounded by toddlers. Get fit to be fit. If it makes you feel sexy, well then bonus. If you feel unsexy because you're not fit, either work on your physical fitness or work on your mental fitness. Either way, that's your issue, not hers.


Totally.  Why do women get soooo frickin' bananas about a woman posting pics of herself?  She feels good about her body, not bad about yours.  Catty.  It gets out of control sometimes.
2013-12-12 11:10:49 PM  
1 votes:

LadyHawke: I notice that it's almost always actresses, fitness models, and fitness bloggers who end up losing the weight quickly.  If it were my job to be in insanely good shape and I was paid enough so I didn't have to do anything but workout and eat perfectly, I would probably have those abs too.


There's a lot of factors at work here, let's face it.

There are some women who take the whole "Hey, I'm eating for TWO!" thing as an excuse to pack on 50 lbs for a pregnancy - which is way more than you need to from the get go - IIRC, a healthy gain is like 20-25 lbs or a bit more.  You don't have to double your normal intake for nine months.

I think that Post Partum depression is a big factor too for some women - my wife had it pretty bad for a couple months.

The point about seeing fitness nuts and celebs whose sole job is to look good - well yea - imagine how many hours a day these gals worked out prior to, during and probably shortly after giving birth?  Plus, for the rich celebs, top notch medical care during to insure eating enough but not too much, a chef to prepare you meals - etc.  Sweet life?  Must make it easier anyway.

I'm not going to comment on the 'letting yourself go' - I'm a guy and gained a ton of weight over a few years and lost it with great effort, so I know about that problem.  I blame a job that just sucked my soul out, and had me working too many hours in a swivel chair.

And if you are pissed by seeing those pics, well, think of them as an object lesson in how it CAN be done, if you are motivated.
2013-12-12 11:10:28 PM  
1 votes:

theMightyRegeya: And if you check out her website, she explains why she's physically fit.


It's also pretty cool that she helps other people achieve their goals.  And good on her.

For the rest of y'all; "Always with the negative waves, Moriarity! ... Why can you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?"
2013-12-12 11:10:00 PM  
1 votes:

Gergesa: sendtodave: voristrupp: I am fit and what's more *I* have a phd and they don't. I think all women should have PhDs or MDs. What's THEIR excuse?

Oh, you mean everybody doesn't share MY priorities in life?

But you would say that, with hard work and determination, anyone could get a phd, right?

You will probably need money or a scholarship also.


And maybe a little intelligence?
2013-12-12 11:08:55 PM  
1 votes:

sendtodave: voristrupp: I am fit and what's more *I* have a phd and they don't. I think all women should have PhDs or MDs. What's THEIR excuse?

Oh, you mean everybody doesn't share MY priorities in life?

But you would say that, with hard work and determination, anyone could get a phd, right?


You will probably need money or a scholarship also.
2013-12-12 11:04:59 PM  
1 votes:

Peki: theMightyRegeya: And honestly, when I see a horde of people complaining about people bragging about physical fitness, the horde never shames men, it's always women!

Funny. Everyone missed that my original problem was with my fiance wanting to dl it as a porn pic. It was his reaction to the picture that set me off.


I just thought it was weird that you provide him with fap material.
2013-12-12 11:04:11 PM  
1 votes:

Peki: sendtodave: People tend to put value on what they are good at. Some people are good at looking good. They shouldn't value that? That shouldn't be an important part of their self identity?

Those are called models, and they have something called photoshop.

This picture? It ignores the social structures behind the woman that allow her to have that body.

LadyHawke: I notice that it's almost always actresses, fitness models, and fitness bloggers who end up losing the weight quickly.  If it were my job to be in insanely good shape and I was paid enough so I didn't have to do anything but workout and eat perfectly, I would probably have those abs too.

This touches on it.

theMightyRegeya: All right, so it's a second response, but I felt the need to add something on top of questioning why physically fit==whore (or something.)

I don't think physical fitness = whore. I think a selfie of your ultrafit body four days after birth (that you KNOW other women can't have)   = AW who knows she's destroying other women's self-esteem.


Women's self esteem is based on how another woman looks?

That doesn't make sense. No, it's based on how they feel that they look.

You're saying that we we get rid of food looking people, more women would feel better about themselves, basically.

Everyone gets a medal!
2013-12-12 11:00:37 PM  
1 votes:

Laobaojun: Anne.Uumellmahaye: This is the first time I've ever seen this image, I'm sorry that I feel no rage for you to be outraged about.

I also don't think it tells women to plop a kid out and immediately head for the treadmill so they can be sexy again. That's not a particularly sexy picture. She's hot, but she's also surrounded by toddlers. Get fit to be fit. If it makes you feel sexy, well then bonus. If you feel unsexy because you're not fit, either work on your physical fitness or work on your mental fitness. Either way, that's your issue, not hers.

This too.
As a guy who is fighting genetics, I sympathize, but surrender is lame.  Fit is sexy, but fit is also fit.  I have never heard of someone who was fit, but didn't feel sexy. Anorexic is not fit, and low BMI with no muscle tone is not fit, and it really does not take that much time out of your week to stay fit.
If this photo made you feel bad, get off your butt, cut the portions down, and stop feeling unfit.


And if you check out her website, she explains why she's physically fit.

For someone who says she's a feminist, that poster is awfully judgemental.

And honestly, when I see a horde of people complaining about people bragging about physical fitness, the horde never shames men, it's always women!  Even feminists shame women for it now!  I guess body shaming's okay if you do the mental gymnastics to say that physically fit women==appeasing the patriarchy and that physically fit women==body-shaming people who aren't physically fit...
2013-12-12 10:58:45 PM  
1 votes:
Laobaojun:   I have never heard of someone who was fit, but didn't feel sexy.

Thereare lots of people who have fit bodies but who have homely faces, or are short, or very tall, who don't ever feel sexy, despite having otherwise attractive, fit bodies.
2013-12-12 10:58:13 PM  
1 votes:
If you are fat months after you've given birth you are disgusting.
2013-12-12 10:56:13 PM  
1 votes:

Peki: "Is that the sort of message you'd want your daughter to get? That the only thing a woman is good for is sex, so who cares that you dropped a 7 pound weight out of your cooch, get back on the treadmill so you can get those abs and look desirable?"

/yes, I'm a feminist. Yes the picture pissed me off. Not because of what it is, but because of the cultural context that surrounds it


All right, so it's a second response, but I felt the need to add something on top of questioning why physically fit==whore (or something.)

Why is it, when I see one of these things admonishing someone for posting physical fitness selfies, it's always a  womanwho is  shamed for  doing what she wants with her body and being proud of it?
2013-12-12 10:53:07 PM  
1 votes:

Peki: sendtodave: Peki: Frederick: Who do you think is most often placing value on a woman's sex appeal -men or women?  In this example the woman clearly has attributed her value to her sex appeal.

Chicken and egg question. They perpetuate it equally, and I don't really care who started it.

Being attractive is bad, and anyone who disagrees is bad.

Huh.

What? How in the heck do you get that from what I've said?


Funny.  I was going to say the exact same thing.

Being attractive is not bad.  Placing your self worth (or value) on being attractive is bad; is the point I'm trying to make.
2013-12-12 10:37:31 PM  
1 votes:
This is the first time I've ever seen this image, I'm sorry that I feel no rage for you to be outraged about.

I also don't think it tells women to plop a kid out and immediately head for the treadmill so they can be sexy again. That's not a particularly sexy picture. She's hot, but she's also surrounded by toddlers. Get fit to be fit. If it makes you feel sexy, well then bonus. If you feel unsexy because you're not fit, either work on your physical fitness or work on your mental fitness. Either way, that's your issue, not hers.
2013-12-12 10:36:45 PM  
1 votes:
Yeah, those were all selfies alright.  You've got a real eye for identifying selfies and you really nailed it.
 
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