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(CNN)   What's the real reason for the post-pregnancy fitness selfie rage? They make women jealous and feel bad about themselves   (cnn.com) divider line 270
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6322 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Dec 2013 at 10:22 PM (36 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-12-13 10:17:57 AM

Benevolent Misanthrope: It's not post-pregnancy fitness selfies that are causing the rage, you idiots.  It's the post-pregnancy fitness selfies accompanied by a caption on the order of, "Look at me!!!  If you aren't predisposed to lose weight quickly and look like me, you're a fat, lazy cow and I WIN ALL THE THINGS!!!!"

the fat cows who don't like being reminded they are fat cows.

FTFY
 
2013-12-13 10:20:44 AM

Peki: Frederick: Who do you think is most often placing value on a woman's sex appeal -men or women?  In this example the woman clearly has attributed her value to her sex appeal.

Chicken and egg question. They perpetuate it equally, and I don't really care who started it.



I go to the gym 5 days a week and I like how it makes me look. It makes me feel confident and I do it for me, not my wife.

Who are you to tell me that I should feel guilty about trying to make myself look fit and be healthy?

Your twisted, self-loathing doesn't define my self-image and I reject your belief that it is supposed to.
 
2013-12-13 10:37:16 AM

Peki: My fiance and I had a small row over this. Normally, I'm good about clicking pics from Fark or other places for him to *ahem* peruse later. This one I said to no to. He got biatchy about it, until I said this:

"Is that the sort of message you'd want your daughter to get? That the only thing a woman is good for is sex, so who cares that you dropped a 7 pound weight out of your cooch, get back on the treadmill so you can get those abs and look desirable?"

/yes, I'm a feminist. Yes the picture pissed me off. Not because of what it is, but because of the cultural context that surrounds it


As opposed to the cultural context of its ok to be a fat cow and use every excuse you can to justify it and make others accept it?


We have an obesity problem in this (and many other countries) and it seems the way we are going to deal with it is to normalize it and make it acceptable.

We have to many people in this country (men and women) sitting on the coach with a quart of Haagen-Dazs and a bag of Oreos listening to the view or Oprah pushing body acceptance.  The pregnant, big boned , metabolically challenged, depressed excuses are just excuses and don't fly.

We have at least 30% of this country of 300 million plus people with weight problems and no system be it Obamacare, Canadian or whatever is going to be able to afford to pay for the consequences of it.
 
2013-12-13 10:49:35 AM
I have a theory that postpartum depression stems from not being able to get a good dicking for 6 weeks (or more) after giving birth.  Penis cures all ails.
 
2013-12-13 11:35:57 AM

rzrwiresunrise: First, it does seem a little strange that so much emphasis would be put on getting back into mating form ASAP once she's squeezed out a pup. I mean, unless she's in tight competition with other females for her mate, or for another potential mate.

Second, it seems as tho there's a very narrow definition of healthy at work here, one that only depends on fitness. Fit and healthy aren't always equivalent; in fact, they can be at odds more often than not. As fit as a lot of elite athletes may be, I'd be hesitant to call them healthy, especially given the myriad injuries that accompany performance at those levels. Additionally, there's plenty of anecdotal evidence of people who are quite fit... and suffering from heart attacks, strokes, etc.

Last, I wonder if there's a skewed perception of what body fat percentages look like in real terms. This is a good article that provides pics and explanations for the various ranges. It's surprising wrt what we imagine looks fit.

Sample:

[www.builtlean.com image 400x273]



This this farking this.  Women think they're judged, men are judged on a much tougher scale.  This needs a survey thread.  For me the doable range for women is 20-40, with 30 being the ideal.  What the doable range for men (according to craigslist women and Farkettes) is 10-20, with 10 being the ideal.
 
2013-12-13 11:40:33 AM
RED ALERT! Someone's feelings have been hurt again!
 
2013-12-13 12:07:25 PM

PerfectHotSauce: I just don't get the outrage. To me, the fitness trainer was sending out a challenge to women who want to get in shape and get healthy, but are having trouble finding motivation or are making excuses that they know are just excuses. If that's not an immediate goal of yours, why are you even paying attention? I'm 18 weeks pregnant with my first and I'm holding Maria Kang as a role model. I don't want to go down the road other members of my family have gone down and still be fighting my baby weight 20 years after my daughter is born, which sounds like what she was doing. Looking at her makes me feel optimistic that that's a lifelong battle I won't have to face. If you look at her and feel anger and outrage, that says more about your issues than hers.



I  more than agree. I worked out t hroughout my pregnancy, lost the weight right away, and did it again a year later with my 2nd kid. And I was in my late 30s. And my whole family's fat.
Guess what, though I lost the weight and work out 5 days per week, Kang was a beauty queen with a certain "look" before pregnancy and i wwasn't. I still don't and won't have her body type. I don't look like her.

I think I look good and I'm glad she looks good and glad to see a woman happy with herself.

If her quesiton is "what's your excuse for being obese and not trying to lose baby weight a year later" I get it completely. But I don't think that is what she is all about. I think she is saying "What's your excuse for not looking like ME  ME ME" and  "how can I attention whore so I can get more clients?" I suspect there is also some insecurity there IN HER. She probably had dreams of being miss america. I am not sure hwat her excuse is for not winning beauty pageants at the national level, becuase obviously other women can manage to, but in any event, I suspect she needs how great she is despite not being miss america to be acknowledged by all.
 
2013-12-13 12:17:51 PM
This magical thing? It's called WILLPOWER. See, when I'm not pregnant I eat less, breastfeed, take my kids to the scary, scary outdoors, and even... Are you ready for this? MAKE FOOD THAT DOESNT INVOLVE A MICROWAVE OR A DRIVE THRU. It's a scary concept, I know. And blah blah blah to the "I'm so busy" bs-ers. Take the stairs. Pack a healthy lunch. Stop drinking soda (diet included). Make healthy dinner in a crockpot. Quit with the excuses.

Lots of us do all of the above and we don't look like Ms. Kang. Do you look like Ms Kang? No? Then what's your excuse?
 
2013-12-13 12:25:39 PM

voristrupp: This magical thing? It's called WILLPOWER. See, when I'm not pregnant I eat less, breastfeed, take my kids to the scary, scary outdoors, and even... Are you ready for this? MAKE FOOD THAT DOESNT INVOLVE A MICROWAVE OR A DRIVE THRU. It's a scary concept, I know. And blah blah blah to the "I'm so busy" bs-ers. Take the stairs. Pack a healthy lunch. Stop drinking soda (diet included). Make healthy dinner in a crockpot. Quit with the excuses.

Lots of us do all of the above and we don't look like Ms. Kang. Do you look like Ms Kang? No? Then what's your excuse?


That post really should have included some actual working out instead of just "take the stairs".  I've seen too many people who consider that a legitimate excuse for exercise.
My ex girlfriend slowly transitioned into one of those during the course of our relationship.  The last straw was that she got a pedometer and would brag about how far she walked during the normal course of her day.  Two whole miles, wow!

/ Also, "going to the gym" does not mean walking on the elliptical for 15 minutes, then doing 5-10 reps on the biceps machine at a low weight.  Most people who "do all the same things fit people do but still can't lose weight" aren't actually paying attention to what fit people do.
 
2013-12-13 12:31:16 PM
Oh, I should also add that a lot of people have no idea what "eat a healthy lunch" means, and think they're doing it but aren't.  Actual conversation with previously mentioned ex-girlfriend-turned-sedant:
her: "I just feel so exhausted, like I have no energy"
me: "Runners call that feeling 'bonking' and it's usually the result of nutritional mistakes.  What'd you eat for dinner?"
her: "a bowl of cereal"
me: "ok fair enough, what about lunch?"
her: "a bowl of cereal"
me: "umm... breakfast?"
her: "....cereal...."
 But it's the Healthy cereal!  Says so right there in the brand name!
 
2013-12-13 01:22:15 PM
when did every single woman get so damn sensitive and filled with excuses?

You don't have to spend hours in a gym to not be fat.

Just don't eat 3,000 calories a farking day.

Not over-eating doesn't take time.

It doesn't require you to be rich or anything.

PUT the farking fork down.
 
2013-12-13 02:02:36 PM
I don't know. Maybe people ought to live their own damn lives and stop trying to keep up with the Joneses? It's worked pretty well for me.
 
2013-12-13 02:21:44 PM

Peki: DebinCO:

I don't need a reading list. I've got my degree in Women's Studies.


Now that's comedy.
 
2013-12-13 08:44:36 PM

Pangea: Peki: Frederick: Who do you think is most often placing value on a woman's sex appeal -men or women?  In this example the woman clearly has attributed her value to her sex appeal.

Chicken and egg question. They perpetuate it equally, and I don't really care who started it.


I go to the gym 5 days a week and I like how it makes me look. It makes me feel confident and I do it for me, not my wife.

Who are you to tell me that I should feel guilty about trying to make myself look fit and be healthy?

Your twisted, self-loathing doesn't define my self-image and I reject your belief that it is supposed to.


Neither of us said that. Take your straw man elsewhere.
 
2013-12-14 12:12:11 AM

sendtodave: Peki: sendtodave: People tend to put value on what they are good at. Some people are good at looking good. They shouldn't value that? That shouldn't be an important part of their self identity?

Those are called models, and they have something called photoshop.

This picture? It ignores the social structures behind the woman that allow her to have that body.

LadyHawke: I notice that it's almost always actresses, fitness models, and fitness bloggers who end up losing the weight quickly.  If it were my job to be in insanely good shape and I was paid enough so I didn't have to do anything but workout and eat perfectly, I would probably have those abs too.

This touches on it.

theMightyRegeya: All right, so it's a second response, but I felt the need to add something on top of questioning why physically fit==whore (or something.)

I don't think physical fitness = whore. I think a selfie of your ultrafit body four days after birth (that you KNOW other women can't have)   = AW who knows she's destroying other women's self-esteem.

Women's self esteem is based on how another woman looks?

That doesn't make sense. No, it's based on how they feel that they look.

You're saying that we we get rid of food looking people, more women would feel better about themselves, basically.

Everyone gets a medal!


Ok I am coming in really late with this one but I believe women's insecurity in relation to how they look compared to other women maybe caused by how society has been engineered so that for a long time women were highly reliant on men for their survival and the survival of their children.   It has only been in very recent history that women have been able to earn enough money to ensure their own survival or the survival of their children without a man (husband).   This has meant for a lot of human history if a man left a woman for a more desirable,  better looking, younger woman that loss could, and this is not being dramatic, mean the possible death through poverty or starvation of the abandoned woman's children and most likely extreme poverty for the woman.   Although this has changed,  changes are slow and society still pushes that how a woman looks is more important than what she does,  her personality or any other attribute she brings to the word and this is especially so when it comes to whether or not she will be able to find a life partner.
 
2013-12-14 12:14:42 AM

Laobaojun: Anne.Uumellmahaye: This is the first time I've ever seen this image, I'm sorry that I feel no rage for you to be outraged about.

I also don't think it tells women to plop a kid out and immediately head for the treadmill so they can be sexy again. That's not a particularly sexy picture. She's hot, but she's also surrounded by toddlers. Get fit to be fit. If it makes you feel sexy, well then bonus. If you feel unsexy because you're not fit, either work on your physical fitness or work on your mental fitness. Either way, that's your issue, not hers.

This too.
As a guy who is fighting genetics, I sympathize, but surrender is lame.  Fit is sexy, but fit is also fit.  I have never heard of someone who was fit, but didn't feel sexy. Anorexic is not fit, and low BMI with no muscle tone is not fit, and it really does not take that much time out of your week to stay fit.
If this photo made you feel bad, get off your butt, cut the portions down, and stop feeling unfit.


I don't completely disagree with your point, but look at elite marathon runners. They are (arguably) the fittest people on the planet with rock bottom BMIs and almost zero muscle tone even in their legs. You can't really say that everyone without muscle is not fit.
 
2013-12-14 12:29:09 AM

bmwericus: LadyHawke: I notice that it's almost always actresses, fitness models, and fitness bloggers who end up losing the weight quickly.  If it were my job to be in insanely good shape and I was paid enough so I didn't have to do anything but workout and eat perfectly, I would probably have those abs too.

There's a lot of factors at work here, let's face it.

There are some women who take the whole "Hey, I'm eating for TWO!" thing as an excuse to pack on 50 lbs for a pregnancy - which is way more than you need to from the get go - IIRC, a healthy gain is like 20-25 lbs or a bit more.  You don't have to double your normal intake for nine months.

I think that Post Partum depression is a big factor too for some women - my wife had it pretty bad for a couple months.

The point about seeing fitness nuts and celebs whose sole job is to look good - well yea - imagine how many hours a day these gals worked out prior to, during and probably shortly after giving birth?  Plus, for the rich celebs, top notch medical care during to insure eating enough but not too much, a chef to prepare you meals - etc.  Sweet life?  Must make it easier anyway.

I'm not going to comment on the 'letting yourself go' - I'm a guy and gained a ton of weight over a few years and lost it with great effort, so I know about that problem.  I blame a job that just sucked my soul out, and had me working too many hours in a swivel chair.

And if you are pissed by seeing those pics, well, think of them as an object lesson in how it CAN be done, if you are motivated.


Firstly I believe women who find this bloggers images upsetting are not necessarily fat, but probably took more than four days to even get their post pregnancy belly down from bloating and after birth blood, let alone fat.

Also because they see someone who has practically all the time in the world to lose weight.   Let's get this woman put her on a lower middle income,  give her a 10 hour a day job in an office, get her driving 80 minutes to and from work each day. Have her, not a nanny or paid person help the children with homework,  bathing, getting lunches ready, cleaning the house  Then lets see if her body looks the same  a year later.

This blogger looks good and she has obviously put in a lot of effort, but she is delusional if she thinks she would be able to put in the same effort if she did not have the rich husband and time to devote to this.    Not to say she would be extremely over weight,  but I am very sure she would be a lot chubbier than she is.
 
2013-12-14 02:47:53 AM
Two moderate workouts a week will keep anyone in shape.

Hardest excecise at the gym is pulling open the front door.
 
2013-12-14 07:47:18 AM

studebaker hoch: Two moderate workouts a week will keep anyone in shape.

Hardest excecise at the gym is pulling open the front door.


I plan on plagiarizing the heck out of "hardest exercise..."
But portion control is the other half of the equation.
 
2013-12-14 10:18:27 AM
FizixJunkee:
You didn't get your PhD in physics, did you?

The "dumbest" physicist I know probably has an IQ in the 100-110 range which, by physics standards, is quite low.  The guy didn't graduate from a top tier school, either.   However, he did work his butt off to graduate, and still works his butt off as a research scientist (he got lucky and chose a "hot field" for which there were ample post doc and research opportunities).   Frankly, he must put that much effort into his work to be any good at it...it just takes him longer to "get" stuff than it does his colleagues/competitors.

I respect that guy a lot and even consider him a friend.  But I seriously doubt he'll ever make significant contributions in his field, even with all the effort he puts into it.

In summary,

1. Persistence and hard work are required to get a PhD, but that doesn't mean they'll be enough to succeed in science once you have your PhD;

2. The smarter you are, the less hard work you have to put into your PhD to graduate.


Wow.
1. Any research outside of physics is inferior.
2. The only reason one would do a PhD is to become a scientist.
3. Making a "significant" contribution to a field you studied in is the only measure of success.
4. And respecting someone you believe to be inferior proves you are superior ("even consider him a friend", seriously?).
Yep, you sound like a physicist alright. How the hell can supposed smarter people not see their own asshole quotient?
Tip to help you in social situations; when you feel the urge to speak... don't... it will take longer for people to dislike you.
 
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