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(Mediaite)   Scientific expert, Gretchen Carlson, would like to warn you that all these touch devices are destroying your fingerprints   (mediaite.com) divider line 73
    More: Fail, Gretchen Carlson, Fox News  
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3711 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 12 Dec 2013 at 5:58 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



73 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-12-12 11:34:10 PM  
"I found Prince!"
"No, no, no, fingerprints!"
"...I don't think so."
 
2013-12-12 11:53:34 PM  

PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: "I found Prince!"
"No, no, no, fingerprints!"
"...I don't think so."


24.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-12-13 12:43:42 AM  
The real question is who did she blow to get into Stanford?
 
2013-12-13 12:53:28 AM  

StopLurkListen: OK, I actually asked this on a tour of what I remember being the FBI headquarters in DC. (I was a little kid... my memory may have some details wonky)

I had recently seen an episode of Battlestar Galactica -- the original, with Lorne Greene -- and they had reached Earth. Part of the plot had them in a police station and fingerprinted. But they had no fingerprints ... what with them being not human and all. (Apparently alien morphology is identical to human except for fingerprints)  The officer said they must have filed their fingerprints off.

I asked the guy giving the tour about that. The answer was, you'd only be gaining scratches that would also be unique identifiers.

The things you remember from decades ago ...

//hey, I kept this CSB on (Entertainment Tab) topic


This is true. Anything you do to alter your fingerprints only add more unique identifiers to you. As it stands, most finger prints are hard to differentiate between people, it is the environmental factors that cause voids in the finger prints that make certain ones standout over others.
 
2013-12-13 01:14:03 AM  

rynthetyn: The real question is who did she blow to get into Stanford?


No, the real question is who did she blow to graduate? But in all seriousness, I'm sure she's very intelligent. Same with Bill O'Reilly (master's from Harvard, 1585 on the SAT back when it still correlated to IQ). I'm sure some of these talking heads really are idiots, but some of them are sociopaths who enjoy getting paid lots of money for easy jobs that also, coincidentally, give them a lot of influence over a lot of idiots.
 
2013-12-13 01:21:29 AM  

eyeq360: "Could it be that people are losing their fingerprints because we're constantly on our fingers, either typing now or on devices?" Carlson asked, to which the answer was "It's possible."  She added that when the TSA told her they couldn't read her fingerprints, she said, "I can become a burglar now, at which my daughter then cried."

Your fingerprints will grow pack.  People have farking dipped their fingers into acid to remove their fingerprints and their fingerprints came back after a while.  A criminal once cut his fingerprint pads from his fingers, cut them up into pieces, and attached them back on in a random way.  Guess what?  The police, after a bit of work, digitally cut the fingerprints into squares and reassembled them in the right way.  And they matched them.
So no, you won't lose your fingerprints permanently.  And no, you wouldn't be a very good burglar since the smarter ones wear gloves, so they don't leave behind fingerprints.


Bullshiat-like typing detected...
 
2013-12-13 01:54:16 AM  

GRCooper: theorellior: They're not even bothering to cover up the fact they're trolling the entire nation, are they.

I'm THIS close to believing that Fox News is an elaborate conspiracy by the left to discredit the right ...


I think Fox News is an elaborate conspiracy by the right to induce rage strokes in lefties, who because of Obamacare won't have coverage and will be left in a vegetative state slightly worse than their normal vegetative state.
 
2013-12-13 03:40:52 AM  

jjorsett: GRCooper: theorellior: They're not even bothering to cover up the fact they're trolling the entire nation, are they.

I'm THIS close to believing that Fox News is an elaborate conspiracy by the left to discredit the right ...

I think Fox News is an elaborate conspiracy by the right to induce rage strokes in lefties, who because of Obamacare won't have coverage and will be left in a vegetative state slightly worse than their normal vegetative state.


I'm going with GRCooper on this one. I was skeptical at first, then you posted that drivel.
 
2013-12-13 03:51:10 AM  
I would gnaw on her body like a chained hound with just one squeeze toy.
 
2013-12-13 05:44:48 AM  

Ed Grubermann: PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: "I found Prince!"
"No, no, no, fingerprints!"
"...I don't think so."

[24.media.tumblr.com image 500x339]


Back in the days when kids shows actually bothered to try to sneak shiat past the radar. Glorious.
 
2013-12-13 07:05:40 AM  
Call me a crazy scientist, but I'd guess it's almost certainly a combination of all the various anti-aging products she's smearing on her face every night to remain employed at Fox.

Using he fingers to apply 50% glycolic acid peels, plus hyaluronic acid gels, plus some form of retinol.

BAM! Minimised fingerprints.


Applying thing proven to smooth then skin can, you know, smooth the skin. Science!
 
2013-12-13 08:51:37 AM  

Elzar: eyeq360: "Could it be that people are losing their fingerprints because we're constantly on our fingers, either typing now or on devices?" Carlson asked, to which the answer was "It's possible."  She added that when the TSA told her they couldn't read her fingerprints, she said, "I can become a burglar now, at which my daughter then cried."

Your fingerprints will grow pack.  People have farking dipped their fingers into acid to remove their fingerprints and their fingerprints came back after a while.  A criminal once cut his fingerprint pads from his fingers, cut them up into pieces, and attached them back on in a random way.  Guess what?  The police, after a bit of work, digitally cut the fingerprints into squares and reassembled them in the right way.  And they matched them.
So no, you won't lose your fingerprints permanently.  And no, you wouldn't be a very good burglar since the smarter ones wear gloves, so they don't leave behind fingerprints.

Bullshiat-like typing detected...


Here is a nice article that mentions the use of acid and fingerprint mutilation.  Note that it states that even after using acid, the ridges come back and it's not totally permanent.
And here's a link to a book that briefly mentions the "cutting up of fingerprints into pieces and reassembling them part."  Made a mistake.  The police took photos and cut the photos up, and did not use a computer.  My bad.
Take the links as you will.
 
2013-12-13 08:54:44 AM  
something something formerly known as prints
 
2013-12-13 08:54:56 AM  
CSS: When I was pregnant, my fingers swelled up enough that now I have cracks in my fingerprints from where the skin was stretched.
 
2013-12-13 09:09:25 AM  

red5ish: She's a replicant replicoont.


FTFY.
 
2013-12-13 09:10:20 AM  

StopLurkListen: I had recently seen an episode of Battlestar Galactica -- the original, with Lorne Greene -- and they had reached Earth. Part of the plot had them in a police station and fingerprinted. But they had no fingerprints ... what with them being not human and all. (Apparently alien morphology is identical to human except for fingerprints) The officer said they must have filed their fingerprints off.


that was not from Battlestar Galactica, that was from Galactica 1980.

It was farking horrible.
 
2013-12-13 09:48:02 AM  

frepnog: It was farking horrible.


Very much THIS. I was 6 and even wee lad that I was thought the show was bad. Later on, I rewatched them and the only decent episode was of Starbuck stranded somewhere with a cylon (voiced by Patrick Stewart)
 
2013-12-13 09:51:19 AM  
I wonder if she has seen attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion.
 
2013-12-13 09:52:52 AM  

Mega Steve: frepnog: It was farking horrible.

Very much THIS. I was 6 and even wee lad that I was thought the show was bad. Later on, I rewatched them and the only decent episode was of Starbuck stranded somewhere with a cylon (voiced by Patrick Stewart)


the only part of Galactica 1980 that was decent were the bikes.
 
2013-12-13 09:53:38 AM  

frepnog: Mega Steve: frepnog: It was farking horrible.

Very much THIS. I was 6 and even wee lad that I was thought the show was bad. Later on, I rewatched them and the only decent episode was of Starbuck stranded somewhere with a cylon (voiced by Patrick Stewart)

the only part of Galactica 1980 that was decent were the bikes.


www.scifiupdates.com
 
2013-12-13 10:05:11 AM  

PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: "I found Prince!"
"No, no, no, fingerprints!"
"...I don't think so."


I loved that show as a kid but it wasn't until a couple of years ago when I saw some clips in a youtube rabbit hole did I realize how filthy of a joke that was.
 
2013-12-13 12:41:30 PM  

ReapTheChaos: Um, no. If that were true people who work with their hands for a living wouldn't have them. My hands are heavily calloused and rough from working my whole life with them but I still have prints.


My palms are just like that.
 
2013-12-14 05:27:20 AM  

KatjaMouse: PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: "I found Prince!"
"No, no, no, fingerprints!"
"...I don't think so."

I loved that show as a kid but it wasn't until a couple of years ago when I saw some clips in a youtube rabbit hole did I realize how filthy of a joke that was.


I just now got that joke, though I don't remember seeing that particular episode.
 
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