Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Talking Points Memo)   And what happened, then? Well, in Congress they say that John Boehner's spine grew three sizes that day   (talkingpointsmemo.com ) divider line
    More: Hero, Boehner, Obama White House  
•       •       •

5806 clicks; posted to Politics » on 11 Dec 2013 at 12:33 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



85 Comments   (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-12-11 12:14:22 PM  
3 x 0 = 0
 
2013-12-11 12:21:01 PM  
Too little, too late
 
2013-12-11 12:21:15 PM  

Bareefer Obonghit: 3 x 0 = 0


And.......done.
 
2013-12-11 12:22:24 PM  

Mentat: Too little, too late


My thoughts exactly

Bohner shat on his own legacy by the bullshiat that he agreed to. Certainly I understand that he was doing it out of loyalty to the party, but Jesus, when you sell your soul you've go too far
 
2013-12-11 12:24:43 PM  

Bareefer Obonghit: 3 x 0 = 0


"Grew three sizes" would be an addition operation, not a multiplication. If I wear a size 9 shoe and grow three sizes, I don't start wearing a size 27.
 
2013-12-11 12:27:49 PM  

kronicfeld: Bareefer Obonghit: 3 x 0 = 0

"Grew three sizes" would be an addition operation, not a multiplication. If I wear a size 9 shoe and grow three sizes, I don't start wearing a size 27.


And the award for the drollest factual correction goes to...
 
2013-12-11 12:32:51 PM  

kronicfeld: Bareefer Obonghit: 3 x 0 = 0

"Grew three sizes" would be an addition operation, not a multiplication. If I wear a size 9 shoe and grow three sizes, I don't start wearing a size 27.


Yeah that occurred to me after I'd already posted. I suppose I could have said "So he's a size 3 now?" But a size 3 spine doesn't make any sense. So then that leads to some variation of "How do you grow 3 sizes in something you lack?" or something about jellyfish. So I'm stuck explaining the shame I feel and running through all the ways it could have gone better. But it just looks like there is no way to grow back.
 
2013-12-11 12:36:00 PM  
Too bad his opinion is irrelevant. Boehner doesn't control what the House does any more than I do
 
2013-12-11 12:36:14 PM  
It's interesting in that it looks like John Boy is actually tired of playing obstructionist and wants to get a deal done and do some governing in 2014.

That and he realizes that they're making a power-play to seize control of the GOP narrative and change the perspective of just 'who' is in charge of the House GOP.
 
2013-12-11 12:36:30 PM  

kronicfeld: Bareefer Obonghit: 3 x 0 = 0

"Grew three sizes" would be an addition operation, not a multiplication. If I wear a size 9 shoe and grow three sizes, I don't start wearing a size 27.


Bzzzt! Wrong.

Growth is an exponential function, which is technically multiplication.

Thanks for playing.
 
2013-12-11 12:38:58 PM  
growing boner?
 
2013-12-11 12:39:08 PM  

mainstreet62: kronicfeld: Bareefer Obonghit: 3 x 0 = 0

"Grew three sizes" would be an addition operation, not a multiplication. If I wear a size 9 shoe and grow three sizes, I don't start wearing a size 27.

Bzzzt! Wrong.

Growth is an exponential function, which is technically multiplication.

Thanks for playing.


Bzzzzt! Wrong.

Growth can be linear.

http://mathcentral.uregina.ca/QQ/database/QQ.09.06/s/rebecca1.html

Thanks for playing.
 
2013-12-11 12:39:11 PM  

Bareefer Obonghit: kronicfeld: Bareefer Obonghit: 3 x 0 = 0

"Grew three sizes" would be an addition operation, not a multiplication. If I wear a size 9 shoe and grow three sizes, I don't start wearing a size 27.

Yeah that occurred to me after I'd already posted. I suppose I could have said "So he's a size 3 now?" But a size 3 spine doesn't make any sense. So then that leads to some variation of "How do you grow 3 sizes in something you lack?" or something about jellyfish. So I'm stuck explaining the shame I feel and running through all the ways it could have gone better. But it just looks like there is no way to grow back.


i.imgur.com
 
2013-12-11 12:39:12 PM  
Way to kill a joke, guys.  Sheesh.  Now I feel dumb AND guilty for laughing.
 
2013-12-11 12:39:59 PM  
Most boring back and forth in a thread ever
 
2013-12-11 12:41:29 PM  
What, no stiffy jokes?

How about he gave someone else a tongue lashing?
 
2013-12-11 12:42:03 PM  

kronicfeld: Bareefer Obonghit: 3 x 0 = 0

"Grew three sizes" would be an addition operation, not a multiplication. If I wear a size 9 shoe and grow three sizes, I don't start wearing a size 27.


"Evolved his spine, so as to provide stronger support, thrice as rapidly"

// you assholes take the fun out of everything
// ..oh wait, EVILution. My bad
 
2013-12-11 12:42:51 PM  
Did he break into Fox News HQ and steal his soul and brain back?  If he did this, I wouldn't be surprised if he threatens to go with the nuclear option of censuring Tea Derpers or worse.  I think it only takes a simple majority I think to boot somebody clean out of the House, and I'm sure he'd have the votes in his own party combined with every Democrat to do so.
 
2013-12-11 12:43:17 PM  

bulldg4life: Most boring back and forth in a thread ever


Oh Reginald? IDISAGREE!
 
2013-12-11 12:43:25 PM  
So I'm assuming this means that Boehner will support more regulations regarding money in politics, or at least allow the house to vote on the DISCLOSE Act?

He's whining about a problem that has largely been created and perpetuated by the republican party.
 
2013-12-11 12:43:35 PM  
This is an awesome budget bill.    It increases spending.

Everybody gets some.

It spends more than the Government takes in.
It adds billions to the national debt

You just can't get any better than that....
 
2013-12-11 12:44:04 PM  
When you reap the devil in the bed you've sown, you dance the tiger's tail.
 
2013-12-11 12:44:50 PM  
Math, killing fun for over 2,000 years.
 
2013-12-11 12:44:55 PM  
Did... did I see Paul Ryan actually smile?  He must be in line for minority whip after 2014.
 
2013-12-11 12:45:14 PM  
So just cross two xes off of his xxxxxs size spine?
 
2013-12-11 12:46:22 PM  
Is it just me or Boehner did sound like he's had few scotchs already.
 
2013-12-11 12:46:51 PM  
Tpm crashes my android browser and the links all take me to their mainpage anyways.

Does him growing a backbone mean all my tea party type coworkers will be screaming rino tomorrow?
 
2013-12-11 12:47:02 PM  
Drunk courage is required to kick the can?  It is an election year, folks...
 
2013-12-11 12:47:08 PM  
What Boehner is saying is that he wants the old days to come back.  The days when party leaders could formulate their propaganda, and it was fed to FAUX News, and cranky old white men ate it up with a spoon, and then voted as they were told.  What he doesn't want is this new-fangled crap where billionaires outside of the established GOP-FAUX News feedback loop fund populist groups to stir the cranky old white men into action, by which I mean taking their lawn chairs to state capitols and holding signs, and then fund reactionaries the billionaires have convinced the cranky old white men they want in office.  Thus tossing out solid, established, always-do-as-they're-told Republicans, whether it's compromising with Democrats or hewing to the official "not one step further, SOSHULIST MONSTER, not ONE STEP FURTHER!" line.

Boehner's view is that he's on top, and the lies start with him, and flow downward.  He dreams of the days when Dubya and Darth could issue marching orders, no matter how categorically stupid and dishonest, and they got nothing but frenzied cheers.  Instead of this crap where the rubes have the nerve to talk back to him.  It's his role to oppose, frustrate and delay every single thing the other party does.  It is not the role of the rubes to oppose, frustrate and delay every single thing he does.

"ONE-WAY STREET" about sums up this new "spine" he's allegedly grown.
 
2013-12-11 12:47:46 PM  

wxboy: Math, killing fun for over 2,000 years.


Correction: Killing fun since 400BC, and probably longer.
 
2013-12-11 12:49:01 PM  

Kibbler: What Boehner is saying is that he wants the old days to come back.  The days when party leaders could formulate their propaganda, and it was fed to FAUX News, and cranky old white men ate it up with a spoon, and then voted as they were told.  What he doesn't want is this new-fangled crap where billionaires outside of the established GOP-FAUX News feedback loop fund populist groups to stir the cranky old white men into action, by which I mean taking their lawn chairs to state capitols and holding signs, and then fund reactionaries the billionaires have convinced the cranky old white men they want in office.  Thus tossing out solid, established, always-do-as-they're-told Republicans, whether it's compromising with Democrats or hewing to the official "not one step further, SOSHULIST MONSTER, not ONE STEP FURTHER!" line.

Boehner's view is that he's on top, and the lies start with him, and flow downward.  He dreams of the days when Dubya and Darth could issue marching orders, no matter how categorically stupid and dishonest, and they got nothing but frenzied cheers.  Instead of this crap where the rubes have the nerve to talk back to him.  It's his role to oppose, frustrate and delay every single thing the other party does.  It is not the role of the rubes to oppose, frustrate and delay every single thing he does.

"ONE-WAY STREET" about sums up this new "spine" he's allegedly grown.


This. I don't see why this is any reason to call him a "hero."
 
2013-12-11 12:50:36 PM  
he's trying desperately to keep his job at this point.
 
2013-12-11 12:50:38 PM  
Hey, remember when Boehner single-handedly shut down the government by refusing to allow the house to vote on a continuing resolution?

Remember when he did that at the behest of the same groups he is now complaining about?

It's nice to finally see him push back a tiny bit.  It's about farking time.  My guess is that this will be quite short lived, however, and that he will soon follow up by issuing sufficient groveling to satisfy his donor/interest group overlords.
 
2013-12-11 12:51:23 PM  
Boehner accusing the tea party of using the GOP?!?!?!

/head asplode
 
2013-12-11 12:51:55 PM  

netcentric: This is an awesome budget bill.    It increases spending.

Everybody gets some.

It spends more than the Government takes in.
It adds billions to the national debt

You just can't get any better than that....



If only there was some way we could cut unnecessary, costly spending...

wpmedia.blogs.ottawacitizen.com
images.tdaxp.com
media1.break.com
 
2013-12-11 12:52:59 PM  

Mager: mainstreet62: kronicfeld: Bareefer Obonghit: 3 x 0 = 0

"Grew three sizes" would be an addition operation, not a multiplication. If I wear a size 9 shoe and grow three sizes, I don't start wearing a size 27.

Bzzzt! Wrong.

Growth is an exponential function, which is technically multiplication.

Thanks for playing.

Bzzzzt! Wrong.

Growth can be linear.

http://mathcentral.uregina.ca/QQ/database/QQ.09.06/s/rebecca1.html

Thanks for playing.


PSSST! All linear functions can be described exponentially.
 
2013-12-11 12:53:02 PM  
Still no stiffy jokes.

Sigh. Do I have to do everything myself?
 
2013-12-11 12:53:19 PM  

Kibbler: "ONE-WAY STREET" about sums up this new "spine" he's allegedly grown.


He IS the Speaker of the House....Third in line for the Presidency...So yeah.  As far as derp-dishing the derp really SHOULD start with him, and flow downwards....that's the way it's supposed to work...The GOP is very hierarchical, and the members LOVE hierarchy.  They thrive on it.  Think about it.  The base is referred to as 'ditto-heads' for a reason.  They don't think well on their own.  So yeah...One-way derp-street is the way it works.

The tea party and libertarians have gotten a little 'too big for their intellectual britches' and are now acting like petulant spoiled children who are used to getting their way when they finally get skull-knocked back to reality.
 
2013-12-11 12:56:35 PM  
Did you know that when you snap a piece of dried spaghetti, it almost never breaks cleanly into two pieces? It's always 3 or more.
 
2013-12-11 12:56:42 PM  

Bareefer Obonghit: kronicfeld: Bareefer Obonghit: 3 x 0 = 0

"Grew three sizes" would be an addition operation, not a multiplication. If I wear a size 9 shoe and grow three sizes, I don't start wearing a size 27.

Yeah that occurred to me after I'd already posted. I suppose I could have said "So he's a size 3 now?" But a size 3 spine doesn't make any sense. So then that leads to some variation of "How do you grow 3 sizes in something you lack?" or something about jellyfish. So I'm stuck explaining the shame I feel and running through all the ways it could have gone better. But it just looks like there is no way to grow back.


I see that.
 
2013-12-11 12:56:44 PM  

netcentric: This is an awesome budget bill.    It increases spending.

Everybody gets some.

It spends more than the Government takes in.
It adds billions to the national debt

You just can't get any better than that....


Bzz, thanks for playing. It increases spending, but it also increases income (fees/taxes/etc) by more than it increases spending helping to reduce the deficit.

Like any good business knows (and the government isn't a household or a business and really shouldn't be compared to one, but I'm going to anyways), you sometimes have to spend money to make money.

5/10 I bit anyways.
 
2013-12-11 12:57:16 PM  

grumpfuff: Kibbler: What Boehner is saying is that he wants the old days to come back.  The days when party leaders could formulate their propaganda, and it was fed to FAUX News, and cranky old white men ate it up with a spoon, and then voted as they were told.  What he doesn't want is this new-fangled crap where billionaires outside of the established GOP-FAUX News feedback loop fund populist groups to stir the cranky old white men into action, by which I mean taking their lawn chairs to state capitols and holding signs, and then fund reactionaries the billionaires have convinced the cranky old white men they want in office.  Thus tossing out solid, established, always-do-as-they're-told Republicans, whether it's compromising with Democrats or hewing to the official "not one step further, SOSHULIST MONSTER, not ONE STEP FURTHER!" line.

Boehner's view is that he's on top, and the lies start with him, and flow downward.  He dreams of the days when Dubya and Darth could issue marching orders, no matter how categorically stupid and dishonest, and they got nothing but frenzied cheers.  Instead of this crap where the rubes have the nerve to talk back to him.  It's his role to oppose, frustrate and delay every single thing the other party does.  It is not the role of the rubes to oppose, frustrate and delay every single thing he does.

"ONE-WAY STREET" about sums up this new "spine" he's allegedly grown.

This. I don't see why this is any reason to call him a "hero."



Well, it's all about perpective.  The GOP has lowered the bar lower than anyone thought was possible.  Nowadays, the media applauds the GOP for doing the most basic things resembling decent or statesmanlike conduct.  It's sad that the GOP has sunk so low that Boehner is being applauded for indirectly acknowledging the blaringly obvious fact that several special interest donor groups have turned the GOP into their bought-and-paid-for puppets.
 
2013-12-11 12:58:38 PM  

Jairzinho: Is it just me or Boehner did sound like he's had few scotchs already.


Was it after 9 AM EST?  If so, then it's probably not you.
 
2013-12-11 12:58:51 PM  

lockers: wxboy: Math, killing fun for over 2,000 years.

Correction: Killing fun since 400BC, and probably longer.



um....4000BC?  2k + 4k = 6k, and we've all heard the 6000yrs thing....

/feel free to flame me if I'm wrong, it'll just feel like a day ending in Y
 
2013-12-11 12:59:55 PM  
Boehner complaining about the GOP being used by conservative groups is like a prostitute complaining you treated her like a whore
 
2013-12-11 01:01:41 PM  

MindStalker: netcentric: This is an awesome budget bill.    It increases spending.

Everybody gets some.

It spends more than the Government takes in.
It adds billions to the national debt

You just can't get any better than that....

Bzz, thanks for playing. It increases spending, but it also increases income (fees/taxes/etc) by more than it increases spending helping to reduce the deficit.

Like any good business knows (and the government isn't a household or a business and really shouldn't be compared to one, but I'm going to anyways), you sometimes have to spend money to make money.

5/10 I bit anyways.



I find it amusing that Paul Ryan/the GOP was perfectly willing to increase fees and taxes that primarily affect the middle class, but was absolutely unwilling to even consider increasing any fees or taxes on the ultra-wealthy.  It gives you a pretty good idea of whose interests they're looking out for.

It also kind of undermines the level of conviction of the GOP when it says "TAXES IN ANY FORM ARE BAD."  Turns out, they're typically fine with tax increases, so long as those tax increases don't affect their ultra-wealthy donors.
 
2013-12-11 01:02:08 PM  

ristst: lockers: wxboy: Math, killing fun for over 2,000 years.

Correction: Killing fun since 400BC, and probably longer.


um....4000BC?  2k + 4k = 6k, and we've all heard the 6000yrs thing....

/feel free to flame me if I'm wrong, it'll just feel like a day ending in Y


Only if you count ancient Sumerians. I guess I was thinking "modern" mathematics as performed by the greeks.
 
2013-12-11 01:03:03 PM  
That'll teach the GOP to stick their Boehner in crazy, or so you'd think.
 
2013-12-11 01:04:04 PM  

NuttierThanEver: Boehner complaining about the GOP being used by conservative groups is like a prostitute complaining you treated her like a whore



This.
 
2013-12-11 01:06:55 PM  

Lord_Baull: netcentric: This is an awesome budget bill.    It increases spending.

Everybody gets some.
It spends more than the Government takes in.
It adds billions to the national debt
You just can't get any better than that....


If only there was some way we could cut unnecessary, costly spending...
(Edit out pics of planes and tanks to save space)


Wouldn't it be nice to cut out some military spending ????     Dang,   just once.
Maybe someone in a super Democratic Stronghold like Philadelphia should lobby to close some unneeded military base.      Like the Philadelphia Navy Yard ?         Then you could use that money to build 'shovel ready' projects for America!  Lead the way.... Forward!
But it won't happen will it?     Nope.

spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend and then spend some more.

Spend more money than you take in.    Add billions to the debt.    Good for America.
 
Displayed 50 of 85 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report