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(NBC News)   For 2015, all GM models will feature a return of the in-car female voice alarm that nags you to put your seat belt on, and stop leaving the right door ajar   (nbcnews.com) divider line 99
    More: Spiffy, CEO, Project Portfolio Management, Ed Whitacre, Center for Automotive Research, quality improvement, investment analyst, auto czar, Dan Akerson  
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983 clicks; posted to Business » on 10 Dec 2013 at 12:27 PM (18 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



99 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-12-10 11:21:30 AM
Seriously though, this is good stuff.  One more glass ceiling broken.  :)
 
2013-12-10 11:34:38 AM
Can GM actually afford a glass ceiling?

More like she got to stick her head through the sunroof.
 
2013-12-10 11:46:13 AM
Gonna see a whole lot of this soon. The children of the 60s are becoming CEOs and GMs now.
 
2013-12-10 11:57:31 AM
"Your door is a jar."
 
2013-12-10 12:36:41 PM
*ding!*. "Hey man, somebody just stole your battery.  I say we go get the motherfarkers!"
 
2013-12-10 12:46:16 PM
www.zuguide.com

Will the radio come pre-tuned to the oldies station?

/Hot dogs, Armour hot dogs!
 
2013-12-10 12:46:25 PM
Nothing can be as nagging as the illuminated check engine light... tastefully dumbed down to an icon in the shape of an engine.
 
2013-12-10 12:48:23 PM
*the door is ajar*

"a door is a door, and a jar is a jar (then close door)

*thank you*

/haha, fav joke ever
//it's the little things in life that amuse me
 
2013-12-10 12:51:19 PM

Random Anonymous Blackmail: Nothing can be as nagging as the illuminated check engine light... tastefully dumbed down to an icon in the shape of an engine.


Worst thing that ever happened to cars. I had to pay $80 to find out that my gas cap wasn't sealing. F*ck your codes!
 
2013-12-10 12:51:55 PM

sure haven't: *the door is ajar*

"a door is a door, and a jar is a jar (then close door)

*thank you*

/haha, fav joke ever
//it's the little things in life that amuse me


The door is only a jar when it's jammed
 
2013-12-10 12:52:20 PM
And the GPS will inform you, "You are lost.  Stop at this gas station and ask for directions."
 
2013-12-10 12:54:30 PM
I remember one of the Japanese cars back in the 80s that would remind you that 'the blake is on'.
 
2013-12-10 01:06:15 PM
Did GM ever have a voice warning system in any of their cars?  I know Nissan did, back when the Datsun brand was still around.  It's a pretty cool little piece of hardware, basically a tiny record player.
 
2013-12-10 01:07:33 PM
I'll only ever own a car that says crap like that if my door can actually polymorph into a jar. Otherwise, it's just false advertising.
 
2013-12-10 01:14:44 PM

valkore: Did GM ever have a voice warning system in any of their cars?  I know Nissan did, back when the Datsun brand was still around.  It's a pretty cool little piece of hardware, basically a tiny record player.


I think some old cadillacs may have had it.  My dad used to have a 1982 Maxima wagon, and it had a plethora of voice alarms on it, lol.
 
2013-12-10 01:17:18 PM
How am I supposed to do drive by moonings with my seat belt on and the minivan door closed?
 
2013-12-10 01:41:40 PM
Will it nag you to stop and ask for directions en lieu of a Nav system, too?
 
2013-12-10 01:52:33 PM

Omnivorous: And the GPS will inform you, "You are lost.  Stop at this gas station and ask for directions."


"Turn left in 300 feet. And I'm thinking I want to have a baby."
 
2013-12-10 01:53:48 PM
"Your door is ajar."

"Please close your door."

"I SAID, CLOSE THE DOOR shiatHEAD!"

/likely not obscure.
 
2013-12-10 02:09:35 PM

I'm an Egyptian!: "Your door is ajar."

"Please close your door."

"I SAID, CLOSE THE DOOR shiatHEAD!"

/likely not obscure.


Came for this, leaving satisfied.
 
2013-12-10 02:15:46 PM

ecmoRandomNumbers: Random Anonymous Blackmail: Nothing can be as nagging as the illuminated check engine light... tastefully dumbed down to an icon in the shape of an engine.

Worst thing that ever happened to cars. I had to pay $80 to find out that my gas cap wasn't sealing. F*ck your codes!


now that every car seems to have a touchscreen/ipad for as an interface, will they still just tell you to check engine or would they actually tell you what sensor is getting tripped.  I imagine a built in code reader will still be a $300 option when you purchase the car though.

gas lid not properly sealed does not equal brakes about to fail...but since the light goes off for each, I still get the panic call from the spouse when she is 200 miles on her way to her folks.
 
2013-12-10 02:28:43 PM
I wonder if they are just arranging for a scapegoat to place all of the current excuses on before they force her out in a few years.
 
2013-12-10 03:01:27 PM

valkore: Did GM ever have a voice warning system in any of their cars?  I know Nissan did, back when the Datsun brand was still around.  It's a pretty cool little piece of hardware, basically a tiny record player.


My grandmother had an 80's Cadillac with a voice warning system. She HATED it. Mostly because she refused to wear her seat belt.
 
2013-12-10 03:13:05 PM
 
2013-12-10 03:14:52 PM

Dr Jack Badofsky: *ding!*. "Hey man, somebody just stole your battery.  I say we go get the motherfarkers!"


"Your lights are on. I SAID YOUR LIGHTS ARE ON, MOTHERfarkER! What the fark? You blind AND deaf?"
 
2013-12-10 03:34:59 PM
i426.photobucket.com
 
2013-12-10 03:44:43 PM
I was once in the car with my father. The check engine indicator came on. He calmly pulled to the side of the road, opened the hood, and said "Well, it's still in here". Closed the hood and got back in the car. One of many WTF moments with my dad.
 
2013-12-10 03:46:41 PM

Znuh: It was predominately in Chryslers in the mid to late 80s.

http://www.examiner.com/article/did-your-car-have-a-door-ajar-voice- al ert-the-1980s-if-so-you-ll-enjoy-these-flashback-videos


The Renault one with the snotty accent is the best. Nothing like being condescended to by your car.
 
2013-12-10 03:57:32 PM

NikkiPoooo: Znuh: It was predominately in Chryslers in the mid to late 80s.

http://www.examiner.com/article/did-your-car-have-a-door-ajar-voice- al ert-the-1980s-if-so-you-ll-enjoy-these-flashback-videos

The Renault one with the snotty accent is the best. Nothing like being condescended to by your car.


The Renault..

t3.gstatic.com
 
2013-12-10 03:59:12 PM
That's wonderful news.

img.fark.net
 
2013-12-10 04:08:42 PM

NikkiPoooo: Znuh: It was predominately in Chryslers in the mid to late 80s.

http://www.examiner.com/article/did-your-car-have-a-door-ajar-voice- al ert-the-1980s-if-so-you-ll-enjoy-these-flashback-videos

The Renault one with the snotty accent is the best. Nothing like being condescended to by your car.


"You'd think with a brain the size of a planet I'd be doing something of consequence. But no. We're here, and your door is ajar."
 
2013-12-10 04:09:45 PM

RottNDude: I was once in the car with my father. The check engine indicator came on. He calmly pulled to the side of the road, opened the hood, and said "Well, it's still in here". Closed the hood and got back in the car. One of many WTF moments with my dad.


Gah!

That's like a customer of mine.

Me: So what's the problem?
Customer: There's a grinding noise at the wheels.
Me: (checks the brakes, notices the rotors are all but gone) Um. Did they make any noise before that?
Customer: Oh yeah! There was a squealing, but that went away, so I figured nothing was wrong.
Me: *facepalm*

/I'm going to make a clock out of that rotor with a sign underneath that says "BAD OWNER"
 
2013-12-10 04:11:59 PM

ecmoRandomNumbers: Random Anonymous Blackmail: Nothing can be as nagging as the illuminated check engine light... tastefully dumbed down to an icon in the shape of an engine.

Worst thing that ever happened to cars. I had to pay $80 to find out that my gas cap wasn't sealing. F*ck your codes!


You could have bought a scan tool for that.
 
2013-12-10 04:14:41 PM
Som GM will come pre-equipped with wife?
 
2013-12-10 04:24:24 PM

valkore: Did GM ever have a voice warning system in any of their cars?  I know Nissan did, back when the Datsun brand was still around.  It's a pretty cool little piece of hardware, basically a tiny record player.


We had a Dodge vehicle (can't remember the model, it was a midsize sedan) when I was growing up that said stuff like "the door is ajar" and "your fuel is low." It was kind of annoying, actually.
 
2013-12-10 04:30:27 PM
Shoulda read the rest of the thread first.
 
2013-12-10 04:57:44 PM

SDRR: ecmoRandomNumbers: Random Anonymous Blackmail: Nothing can be as nagging as the illuminated check engine light... tastefully dumbed down to an icon in the shape of an engine.

Worst thing that ever happened to cars. I had to pay $80 to find out that my gas cap wasn't sealing. F*ck your codes!

You could have bought a scan tool for that.


I've got one I bought off NewEgg for $15 so I can do a quick check if the light ever pops on. They are really pretty cheap these days, even the ones that connect to an iPhone for detailed readouts.
 
2013-12-10 05:01:57 PM
And don't forget to put the seat 'up' or 'down' depending on my mood.
 
2013-12-10 05:33:36 PM
For the last farking time: it's a door, not a farking jar goddammit!
 
2013-12-10 05:35:40 PM

Ow! That was my feelings!: [i426.photobucket.com image 640x480]

Daisy

, Daisy give me your answer do ....
 
2013-12-10 05:48:28 PM

Mad_Radhu: SDRR: ecmoRandomNumbers: Random Anonymous Blackmail: Nothing can be as nagging as the illuminated check engine light... tastefully dumbed down to an icon in the shape of an engine.

Worst thing that ever happened to cars. I had to pay $80 to find out that my gas cap wasn't sealing. F*ck your codes!

You could have bought a scan tool for that.

I've got one I bought off NewEgg for $15 so I can do a quick check if the light ever pops on. They are really pretty cheap these days, even the ones that connect to an iPhone for detailed readouts.


any of your neighborhood autoparts stores will read it for free.
 
2013-12-10 05:54:55 PM
drawception.com
 
2013-12-10 06:15:57 PM
Chrysler did that back in 1987....

"A Door is A Jar" - "Don't Forget Your Cheese" (something like that)

They should have used Ricardo Montalban's voice.

img2u.info
 
2013-12-10 06:21:23 PM
Will she tell me when she proceeds into Menopause?
 
2013-12-10 06:23:33 PM

ecmoRandomNumbers: Random Anonymous Blackmail: Nothing can be as nagging as the illuminated check engine light... tastefully dumbed down to an icon in the shape of an engine.

Worst thing that ever happened to cars. I had to pay $80 to find out that my gas cap wasn't sealing. F*ck your codes!


Usually it means remove your MAF sensor.
 
2013-12-10 06:26:12 PM

valkore: Did GM ever have a voice warning system in any of their cars?  I know Nissan did, back when the Datsun brand was still around.  It's a pretty cool little piece of hardware, basically a tiny record player.



The only warnings that should be considered.
 
2013-12-10 06:26:36 PM

DrSansabeltNoShiatSlacks: Will she tell me when she proceeds into Menopause?


Radiator fluid stops turning red?
 
2013-12-10 06:43:54 PM
If they wanted it to be more effective, they would get R. Lee Ermey to do the voice.
 
2013-12-10 06:46:08 PM
Way to 'earn' the job there, hotlegs.
 
2013-12-10 06:48:08 PM
GLADOS should do the voice for it...

img2u.info
 
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