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(CBS Sports)   South Carolina football player Jadeveon Clowney ticketed for going 110 mph. No word on the fate of the other 20 people in the car   (cbssports.com) divider line 74
    More: Dumbass, Jadeveon Clowney, David Clowney, South Carolina, football, Clowney ticketed, South Carolina Highway Patrol, auto racing  
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1012 clicks; posted to Sports » on 10 Dec 2013 at 7:34 PM (33 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



74 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2013-12-09 10:24:38 PM
Listen, you shouldn't drive 110 MPH anywhere but on a race car track.

And you should never be allowed to write anything ever again for the rest of your life.
 
2013-12-09 11:46:00 PM
I had never heard of this kid before tonight, but that headline made me larf.
 
2013-12-10 07:39:38 PM

NewportBarGuy: Listen, you shouldn't drive 110 MPH anywhere but on a race car track.

And you should never be allowed to write anything ever again for the rest of your life.


For any number of reasons you're right.  But the rest of the paragraph makes it even worse....

Listen, you shouldn't drive 110 MPH anywhere but on a race car track. It's dangerous and you could seriously hurt yourself or somebody else, if not kill them. But you know what? I've done it and it was awesome .

Seriously?? THAT's how you end that paragraph, hack CBSSports.com writer??
 
2013-12-10 07:41:55 PM

Lorelle: I had never heard of this kid before tonight, but that headline made me larf.


Lucky you, you must not have ESPN.
 
2013-12-10 07:42:20 PM
A lot of bad press about Clowney this year, but this story is nothing.  He's, what, 20?  What 20-year old male hasn't driven fast?  Granted most aren't set to make millions if they stay straight, but the fact remains that he's a young dude being a young dude.
 
2013-12-10 07:42:42 PM
Late HOTYC run there by Subby

+1 if I could
 
2013-12-10 07:47:11 PM
images1.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-12-10 07:53:03 PM
Dumb? Yes. Worthy of national attention and scandal? No.
 
2013-12-10 07:55:21 PM
img.youtube.com
 
2013-12-10 07:55:31 PM
I've gone faster than that...in a minivan. It wasn't that awesome (Though getting to my destination an hour earlier was).

Kid's doing a GREAT job trying to work his way down the draft boards though.
 
2013-12-10 08:04:50 PM

IAmRight: I've gone faster than that...in a minivan. It wasn't that awesome (Though getting to my destination an hour earlier was).

Kid's doing a GREAT job trying to work his way down the draft boards though.


Sandbagging it to avoid injury.  He will destroy the combine and the Texans are going to have a nasty D for years.
 
2013-12-10 08:09:30 PM

IAmRight: I've gone faster than that...in a minivan. It wasn't that awesome (Though getting to my destination an hour earlier was).

Kid's doing a GREAT job trying to work his way down the draft boards though.


What model of minivan?  Mine struggles not to rattle itself apart if it goes above 82.
 
2013-12-10 08:14:17 PM
So much win
 
2013-12-10 08:18:23 PM

aintnuttintofarkwith: [img.youtube.com image 480x360]


I just saw that skit on youtube the other day and it fits so well here.  I lol'd.
 
2013-12-10 08:24:29 PM
Yes I'm sure a speeding ticket will scare off NFL teams. They'd never want to be associated with someone who gets a citation for speeding.

That kind of criminal element would never make it in the NFL and wouldn't fit in in the lockerroom which as we all know is populated exclusively by choir boys.
 
2013-12-10 08:31:25 PM
Makes me wish he was involved in a single vehicle accident.
 
2013-12-10 08:48:22 PM

sephjnr: Late HOTYC run there by Subby

+1 if I could


I gotcha. It'll run in the HOTY contest next year. OH IT'LL BE THERE
 
2013-12-10 08:48:34 PM

LucklessWonder: IAmRight: I've gone faster than that...in a minivan. It wasn't that awesome (Though getting to my destination an hour earlier was).

Kid's doing a GREAT job trying to work his way down the draft boards though.

What model of minivan?  Mine struggles not to rattle itself apart if it goes above 82.


Kinda what I was thinking.  I bet they have a fuel cutoff not too far north of 100 so the groceries don't get all effed up.
 
2013-12-10 09:03:04 PM
Holy crap, this is the seasons of miracles as not only do I finally agree with NewportBarGuy, but it took a farking Gamecock to bring us to common ground...

It seems that more and more "writers" are finding it appropriate to inject their opinions into their articles and I for one do not like it one bit!

Just report the facts and let us the reader come to our own conclusions; I really don't care if you have or haven't reached 110 MPH in any type of vehicle, nor do I care if you find said behavior horrible or not.
 
2013-12-10 09:04:42 PM
I feel bad for this guy's future wife.
 
2013-12-10 09:05:17 PM
He could OJ the entire Gamecock cheerleader squad, and still go no lower than 5th.

/but I doubt the Texas will take him.
 
2013-12-10 09:09:31 PM

aintnuttintofarkwith: [img.youtube.com image 480x360]


How about some real ones?

static03.mediaite.com

static03.mediaite.com

static03.mediaite.com

static03.mediaite.com

static03.mediaite.com
 
2013-12-10 09:11:05 PM
www.lostlettermen.com
Monshadrick Hunter
 
2013-12-10 09:12:13 PM
www.lostlettermen.com
De'Asian Richardson
 
2013-12-10 09:30:07 PM

SubBass49: [www.lostlettermen.com image 275x400]
De'Asian Richardson


De'Asian has d'knockers
 
2013-12-10 09:30:29 PM

bdub77: I feel bad for this guy's future wife.


Sega Outrun
 
2013-12-10 09:48:03 PM

Slow To Return: bdub77: I feel bad for this guy's future wife.

Sega Outrun


could be worse could be Ridge Racer
 
2013-12-10 10:19:47 PM
Clowney being clowny may not fly high with the draft for this.
 
2013-12-10 10:29:21 PM

aintnuttintofarkwith: [img.youtube.com image 480x360]


This seems like a good place to re-post a game I tried to get going in a recent baby naming thread. Something I've been working on. It's called: Real Football Player or Key & Peele Character? See if you can guess which is which:

See who can guess which is which:

D'Brickashaw Ferguson
D'Squarius Green, Jr.
Ozmataz Buckshank
Barkevious Mingo
Frostee Rucker
D'Isiah T. Billings-Clyde
Captain Munnerlyn
Ibrahim Moizoos
D'Glester Hardunkichud
Colt McCoy
Jadeveon Clowney
Joplo Bartu
Prince Amukamara
T'Variusness King
Damore'ea Strinfellow
Vontaze Burfict
 
2013-12-10 10:30:31 PM
I guess I only needed to say "guess which is which" once. Proofreading, dammit.
 
2013-12-10 10:32:17 PM

Jack_Knopf: A lot of bad press about Clowney this year, but this story is nothing.  He's, what, 20?  What 20-year old male hasn't driven fast?  Granted most aren't set to make millions if they stay straight, but the fact remains that he's a young dude being a young dude.


Not buying it. No strong odor of Marijuana involvement.
 
2013-12-10 10:37:46 PM

Super Chronic: Colt McCoy


Hey now. Best name for a Texas quarterback ever.
 
2013-12-10 10:46:51 PM

Di Atribe: Hey now. Best name for a Texas quarterback ever.


Chase Daniel like him:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKAbA5AUgtY
 
2013-12-10 11:02:41 PM
Must be a very very very slow sports news day
 
2013-12-10 11:08:02 PM
Nicely done subster.
 
2013-12-10 11:11:48 PM
He was racing to city hall to change his name.

Has anyone mentioned his weird name yet?
 
2013-12-10 11:19:51 PM

LucklessWonder: What model of minivan?  Mine struggles not to rattle itself apart if it goes above 82.


A '91 Mazda MPV. (Got it up to 127 but yeah, then it started to feel like it was going to rattle itself apart).

/was a stupid-ass 17-year-old
//I later totaled it doing 30 mph...stupid f*cking ice
 
2013-12-11 12:00:47 AM
Took me a second, but that is a helluva headline
 
2013-12-11 12:02:45 AM
so...110MPH ticket gets an ESPN mention, violating the Spirit of the Rule (Manziel) gets a half game suspension, and a Snow ball gets you suspended from a bowl game?
 
2013-12-11 12:15:10 AM
The South Carolina Highway Patrol pulled Clowney over in a Chrysler 300.

MSRP is $30,000.

I wonder what booster owns that car.
 
2013-12-11 12:17:47 AM

akuma976: so...110MPH ticket gets an ESPN mention, violating the Spirit of the Rule (Manziel) gets a half game suspension, and a Snow ball gets you suspended from a bowl game?


That'$ why it pay$ to be in the $EC.
 
2013-12-11 12:17:55 AM

akuma976: so...110MPH ticket gets an ESPN mention, violating the Spirit of the Rule (Manziel) gets a half game suspension, and a Snow ball gets you suspended from a bowl game?


Just trying to get them ready for the real world or life in the No Fun League.
 
2013-12-11 12:23:28 AM

Super Chronic: aintnuttintofarkwith: [img.youtube.com image 480x360]

This seems like a good place to re-post a game I tried to get going in a recent baby naming thread. Something I've been working on. It's called: Real Football Player or Key & Peele Character? See if you can guess which is which:

See who can guess which is which:

D'Brickashaw Ferguson REAL
D'Squarius Green, Jr. K&P
Ozmataz Buckshank K&P
Barkevious Mingo REAL
Frostee Rucker K&P
D'Isiah T. Billings-Clyde K&P
Captain Munnerlyn REAL
Ibrahim Moizoos REAL
D'Glester Hardunkichud K&P
Colt McCoy REAL
Jadeveon Clowney REAL
Joplo Bartu K&P
Prince Amukamara REAL
T'Variusness King K&P
Damore'ea Strinfellow K&P
Vontaze Burfict REAL


How'd I do?  Promise I didn't cheat.
 
2013-12-11 12:31:27 AM

TheShavingofOccam123: The South Carolina Highway Patrol pulled Clowney over in a Chrysler 300.

MSRP is $30,000.

I wonder what booster owns that car.


Someone smart enough to write the check out to 'Cash'.  The day the NCAA hires forensic accountants on a battalion level is when they get serious about cleaning up the money.
 
2013-12-11 12:53:52 AM
Super Chronic: aintnuttintofarkwith: [img.youtube.com image 480x360]

This seems like a good place to re-post a game I tried to get going in a recent baby naming thread. Something I've been working on. It's called: Real Football Player or Key & Peele Character? See if you can guess which is which:

See who can guess which is which:


D'Brickashaw Ferguson - real
D'Squarius Green, Jr. - K & P
Ozmataz Buckshank. - K & P 
Barkevious Mingo - real 
Frostee Rucker - real 
D'Isiah T. Billings-Clyde - K & P 
Captain Munnerlyn - K & P 
Ibrahim Moizoos - real 
D'Glester Hardunkichud. - K & P 
Colt McCoy - real 
Jadeveon Clowney - real 
Joplo Bartu . - K & P 
Prince Amukamara - real
T'Variusness King - real 
Damore'ea Strinfellow. - K & P 
Vontaze Burfict. - K & P 

I have no faith in being even 70% accurate, but I'll still take a shot.
 
2013-12-11 01:05:26 AM

LucklessWonder: IAmRight: I've gone faster than that...in a minivan. It wasn't that awesome (Though getting to my destination an hour earlier was).

Kid's doing a GREAT job trying to work his way down the draft boards though.

What model of minivan?  Mine struggles not to rattle itself apart if it goes above 82.


I did 125 in a Ford Aerostar
 
2013-12-11 01:13:06 AM

SubBass49: aintnuttintofarkwith: [img.youtube.com image 480x360]

How about some real ones?

[static03.mediaite.com image 434x271]

[static03.mediaite.com image 598x376]

[static03.mediaite.com image 662x248]

[static03.mediaite.com image 502x368]

[static03.mediaite.com image 626x238]


The Monds family has a long tradition.
www.footballcardgallery.com
http://www.footballcardgallery.com/1973+Nebraska+Playing+Cards/13+D/ Wo nder-Monds/
 
2013-12-11 01:19:11 AM
Awesome headline.

Also, CLOWNS ARE NOT FREAKING PEOPLE!!

us.123rf.com
 
2013-12-11 01:57:56 AM

Super Chronic: aintnuttintofarkwith: [img.youtube.com image 480x360]

This seems like a good place to re-post a game I tried to get going in a recent baby naming thread. Something I've been working on. It's called: Real Football Player or Key & Peele Character? See if you can guess which is which:

See who can guess which is which:

D'Brickashaw Ferguson
D'Squarius Green, Jr.
Ozmataz Buckshank
Barkevious Mingo
Frostee Rucker
D'Isiah T. Billings-Clyde
Captain Munnerlyn
Ibrahim Moizoos
D'Glester Hardunkichud
Colt McCoy
Jadeveon Clowney
Joplo Bartu
Prince Amukamara
T'Variusness King
Damore'ea Strinfellow
Vontaze Burfict


I like this game. Since I'm on my phone, I'll just list the ones I know for sure.

REAL
D'Brickashaw Ferguson
Barkevious Mingo
Frostee Rucker
Colt McCoy
Clowney
Bartu (I think)
Burfict

K&P
Ozmataz Buckshank
D'Isiah T. Billings-Clyde
Ibrahim Moizoos (I think)
D'Glester Hardunkichud (I think, but if he's real, then nobody stands a chance at this)
 
2013-12-11 02:11:58 AM

Super Chronic: aintnuttintofarkwith: [img.youtube.com image 480x360]

This seems like a good place to re-post a game I tried to get going in a recent baby naming thread. Something I've been working on. It's called: Real Football Player or Key & Peele Character? See if you can guess which is which:

See who can guess which is which:

D'Brickashaw Ferguson
D'Squarius Green, Jr.
Ozmataz Buckshank
Barkevious Mingo
Frostee Rucker
D'Isiah T. Billings-Clyde
Captain Munnerlyn
Ibrahim Moizoos
D'Glester Hardunkichud
Colt McCoy
Jadeveon Clowney
Joplo Bartu
Prince Amukamara
T'Variusness King
Damore'ea Strinfellow
Vontaze Burfict


You forgot one!
 
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