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(SeattlePI)   Dear Carolyn: I think my brother is a big jerk for not buying any of my kids Christmas presents. He doesn't have any children of his own, so it's obvious he has tons of disposable income   (seattlepi.com) divider line 135
    More: Stupid, Christmas presents  
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11760 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Dec 2013 at 11:43 AM (40 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-12-09 10:37:58 AM
That was actually some pretty solid advice.
 
2013-12-09 10:42:39 AM

Diogenes: That was actually some pretty solid advice.


MYOB is pretty solid advice for a lot of situations.
 
2013-12-09 10:47:10 AM

Ambivalence: Diogenes: That was actually some pretty solid advice.

MYOB is pretty solid advice for a lot of situations.


Ain't that that sad truth.
 
2013-12-09 10:51:04 AM

Diogenes: Ambivalence: Diogenes: That was actually some pretty solid advice.

MYOB is pretty solid advice for a lot of situations.

Ain't that that sad truth.


and yet, few people notice

OMG HE'S NOT BUYING OUR CROTCHFRUIT GIFTS!!!

/personally, I'd rather not have kids
//It's just not for me.
 
2013-12-09 11:16:31 AM
According to every ettiquette book I've ever read, from Emily Post to Miss Manners, gifts are never, ever obligatory.  Customary, in some situations (attending a wedding, for example, or bringing a bottle of wine to dinner), but never obligatory.

My half-sister is permanently pissed off at me because I sent a gift to her son when he was born, but haven't sent gifts since.  Never mind that she and I have met 6 times total, that I've never seen the kid, and the last time I saw her was 5 years ago... No, it's all about the BAAAAYYYY-BEEEEEEEE!!!!!  Every farking year, she hits up our father to try to guilt me about it.  And every year, I tell him I don't know the little bastage and it's not like our family gets together at Christmas, so she can STFU.  It's not my job to buy her kid toys.

At Christmas, I buy and help refurbish old bikes to give to kids whose families can't afford one.  In my memory, growing up in a house where money was tight, getting my own wheels was the Best. Thing. EVER.
 
2013-12-09 11:16:50 AM
Dear Carolyn,

Your brother and his wife are obviously pedophiles who are growing increasingly uncomfortable with their ability to disguise their lust for your children.  Try using magic marker to draw sideburns and mustaches on your children to assist your brother and his wife in resisting the Satanic whisperings in their ears.

Up your nose with a rubber hose,
Lor M. Ipsum
 
2013-12-09 11:26:05 AM
This has less to do with gifts for children, and more to do with a significant flaw in human thinking.  Don't ever stop doing things for other people that you have consistently done in the past, especially if it benefits them.

If you do stop, you will be crucified.

People who never contribute get a pass for some reason.
 
2013-12-09 11:33:19 AM
If your brother and his wife give a lot of toys to the church charity and a lot of toys to his wife's god-daughter but they don't give gifts to your kids, then that means that your brother and his wife believe that your kids are undeserving of gifts. They're probably spoiled little shiats, but you don't realize it because they're just like you.
 
2013-12-09 11:46:26 AM

Lando Lincoln: If your brother and his wife give a lot of toys to the church charity and a lot of toys to his wife's god-daughter but they don't give gifts to your kids, then that means that your brother and his wife believe that your kids are undeserving of gifts. They're probably spoiled little shiats, but you don't realize it because they're just like you. that your kids are well provided for so them wasting their money buying them shiat they don't want or need would be stupid.

 
2013-12-09 11:47:20 AM
Wow.  Rich people problems.
 
2013-12-09 11:48:29 AM
Spoiled Coont.
Maybe if you weren't such a worthless mother, then you'd not have to hide behind your brother and sister-in-laws success
Maybe you should to get a part time job at Walmart if your little vag droppings need to consistently codified with commercialized accessories.
 
2013-12-09 11:49:25 AM
He should dress up like Jerry Sandusky and show up Christmas morning, shouting "Shower time!"
 
2013-12-09 11:50:30 AM
The brother is forgetting that it his duty as a sibling to buy really noisy and annoying toys for his nieces and nephews. Or something easily broken with lots of little pieces that get underfoot.
 
2013-12-09 11:51:14 AM

Doctor Funkenstein: He should dress up like Jerry Sandusky and show up Christmas morning, shouting "Shower time!"


This is why you're a nice shade of Blue in my favs....

I chuckled way more than I expected  and I re-read it a couple times and then the visualization just made me laugh more.
 
2013-12-09 11:51:51 AM
You are what's wrong with Christmas, biatch.
 
2013-12-09 11:51:57 AM
OMG HE IS BUYING GIFTS FOR NEEDY KIDS BUT NOT MY WELL-TO-DO CROTCHFRUIT!
 
2013-12-09 11:52:08 AM
This is way less funny than the fake ones to Dear Prudence.
 
2013-12-09 11:52:49 AM
I knew my brother was going to spoil the hell out of his kids from the get-go, so I resolved to buy them savings bonds for their birthdays/Christmas every year, tucked into a suitable card addressed to the parents.  The kids get enough from everybody else that they never noticed that there was never a present to them with Uncle Mike's name on it. That had to stop, however, when the gov switched to online-only ordering, and the recipient had to have an account.  Asked my brother to set up an account for the kids with him as the guardian/conservator so I could continue, but he still hasn't.  So I've switched to board games.  Those kids do *not* need more video games or money.
 
2013-12-09 11:54:22 AM
I have no kids.
Three sisters.
They all popped out kids.
At the same time.
I used to bring them Cleaned, Emptied Ben & Jerry's containers with socks that had VERMONT in green on them, and small, quiet toys in them.

Unka Vudu is liked.

Now that they are all getting married and graduating college, they get gift baskets of Vermont wines, cheeses, Maple Syrup and maple jerky, etc. etc.
 
2013-12-09 11:55:42 AM
encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com
 
2013-12-09 11:56:00 AM

Diogenes: Ambivalence: Diogenes: That was actually some pretty solid advice.

MYOB is pretty solid advice for a lot of situations.

Ain't that that sad truth.


This and that. My brother and his wife have 2 kids and they are at the very top of my Christmas list but shaming someone into giving presents is ridiculous.
 
2013-12-09 11:56:24 AM
Meanwhile, I'm pretty sure my brother and sister-in-law will be relieved this year that their little one is only getting one gift from us (my SO and I, not the entire family). Less junk for them to keep track of!
 
2013-12-09 11:56:35 AM
Ah, the old obligiftation situation.
 
2013-12-09 11:57:46 AM

HailRobonia: The brother is forgetting that it his duty as a sibling to buy really noisy and annoying toys for his nieces and nephews. Or something easily broken with lots of little pieces that get underfoot.


I would think that a set of bagpipes and a drumkit would be in order.
 
2013-12-09 11:58:20 AM
This sounds like a very angry sister.  If she wants disposable income of her own to buy gifts for her kids, then she should do what every respectable woman has done for generations. Get on her back, point her heels to Jesus and think about handbags.

/Will and Grace finale, Karen Walker
 
2013-12-09 11:58:32 AM

HailRobonia: The brother is forgetting that it his duty as a sibling to buy really noisy and annoying toys for his nieces and nephews. Or something easily broken with lots of little pieces that get underfoot.


Lego. No better revenge than stepping on one of those without shoes on.
 
2013-12-09 11:58:57 AM
I have one child, my ex-sister-in-law had 5 children and was poor (go figure), so every Christmas she would expect a few presents for each kid, and then give my daughter 2 dollar coloring books and crayons.  This just in, people are greedy and dumb.
 
2013-12-09 11:59:06 AM

Benevolent Misanthrope: According to every ettiquette book I've ever read, from Emily Post to Miss Manners, gifts are never, ever obligatory.  Customary, in some situations (attending a wedding, for example, or bringing a bottle of wine to dinner), but never obligatory.

My half-sister is permanently pissed off at me because I sent a gift to her son when he was born, but haven't sent gifts since.  Never mind that she and I have met 6 times total, that I've never seen the kid, and the last time I saw her was 5 years ago... No, it's all about the BAAAAYYYY-BEEEEEEEE!!!!!  Every farking year, she hits up our father to try to guilt me about it.  And every year, I tell him I don't know the little bastage and it's not like our family gets together at Christmas, so she can STFU.  It's not my job to buy her kid toys.

At Christmas, I buy and help refurbish old bikes to give to kids whose families can't afford one.  In my memory, growing up in a house where money was tight, getting my own wheels was the Best. Thing. EVER.


cool.
 
2013-12-09 12:00:13 PM

HailRobonia: The brother is forgetting that it his duty as a sibling to buy really noisy and annoying toys for his nieces and nephews. Or something easily broken with lots of little pieces that get underfoot.


Solid advice there.

This column (fake or not) could easily been written by my brother.  He got livid when he found out that D1vwife and I get gifts for anonymous children through the "Giving Tree" at work along with giving gifts to anonymous seniors through the local "Meals on Wheels" program.  He apparently feels that the money is better spent "in the family" and that I should be buying gifts for his 5 (Five!) little spawn.

I only see these undisciplined little hellions once a year anyway, and even that is too much.
 
2013-12-09 12:00:33 PM

Diogenes: That was actually some pretty solid advice.



^^^THIS^^^

Maybe the brother is more annoyed by the family than he lets on and tried to bow out gracefully.
Maybe the brother and his wife decided to pour their charity into helping the poor.
Maybe the brother is just overwhelmed with a ton of kids in the house.
Maybe he isn't as touchy-feely about tight family bonds as some of the others.

It's his choice and the letter-writer sounds immature.  At some point the gifts for kids stops--I'm 44 and haven't seen shiat from the Aunts and Uncles in decades. And that's fine because why would I?
 
2013-12-09 12:01:37 PM

CheatCommando: HailRobonia: The brother is forgetting that it his duty as a sibling to buy really noisy and annoying toys for his nieces and nephews. Or something easily broken with lots of little pieces that get underfoot.

I would think that a set of bagpipes and a drumkit would be in order.


No no no. A drum kit, an electric guitar, a bass guitar, a book and CD set about the Sex Pistols and a box of safety pins.
 
2013-12-09 12:02:21 PM
I guess that the brother and his wife don't have any meaningful relationships with their nieces and nephews...

Personally, me and my wife look at the children as the ones that get the most out of Christmas, and for any kids that comes over, related or not, we feel a little something can make the child feel a bit special, and it's just nice to do, if only to see the child's smile.

Then again, me and my wife had pathetic childhoods, and don't believe that kids should be in a situation where they'd feel like no one gives a crap about them.

And any kid that comes to my house is made to feel like they are part of the family, and we talk with them, play with them, etc.

This includes our kid's friends, and family that we barely see or haven't seen in many years... they are all told repeatedly that they are more than welcome to come over and call on us for anything that we can be there for them... something that I never had growing up, nor as an adult... my relatives sucks and I'd rather break that BS.

Many nieces and nephews had crappy parents and lives, and we are their family is they so want one...

So I'd say that if this brother doesn't give a crap about those kids, well... at some point, if they end up without kids but wanting to suddenly have family.. these kids will remember them... or not.

I know many childless people, and they have accepted to be childless due to their lifestyle, etc. but they are all over their nieces and nephews all the time and share their lives to a very high extent, and that's very nice I find.
 
2013-12-09 12:03:13 PM

Lando Lincoln: CheatCommando: HailRobonia: The brother is forgetting that it his duty as a sibling to buy really noisy and annoying toys for his nieces and nephews. Or something easily broken with lots of little pieces that get underfoot.

I would think that a set of bagpipes and a drumkit would be in order.

No no no. A drum kit, an electric guitar, a bass guitar, a book and CD set about the Sex Pistols and a box of safety pins.


4.bp.blogspot.com

Oh yes. Oh yes. Oh yes.
 
2013-12-09 12:04:05 PM

Diogenes: That was actually some pretty solid advice.


Agreed. I personally went for the "don't expect me to pay for anything but a plug for your baby cannon, sister", but that's just how I roll.
 
2013-12-09 12:07:54 PM

imfallen_angel


...don't believe that kids should be in a situation where they'd feel like no one gives a crap about them.

And any kid that comes to my house is made to feel like they are part of the family, and we talk with them, play with them, etc.

This includes our kid's friends, and family that we barely see or haven't seen in many years... they are all told repeatedly that they are more than welcome to come over and call on us for anything that we can be there for them...


You I like.
 
2013-12-09 12:08:41 PM
It hurts even more considering the fact that they provide a veritable waterfall of presents for Lisa's goddaughter and every year they buy a ton of toys for the "giving tree" at their church!
Yea, god forbid they spend their loads of disposable income on kids who otherwise may not get any presents this year. What a terrible couple.
 
2013-12-09 12:08:53 PM
Hmmm, reminds me of my sister near Seattle and her 7 crotchfruit by four different husbands...I even have a childless brother named Ted.

Anyway, she laid this guilt trip on me in 1989 while on her third hubby (6 kids), and got thoroughly pissed off when I told her no. I had just given her $3500 as a down payment on a house several months earlier, and considered that more important. As a consequence I have only seen her twice since...once for a few minutes at a function in 2001 and again at a funeral in 2012. C'est la vie.
 
2013-12-09 12:12:21 PM

Diogenes: That was actually some pretty solid advice.


I like that it was more of a dressing down than advice.  Best one of these I have read in a while.  I would be compelled to read them more if the advice boiled down to "are you f'ing kidding me?  Check yourself idiot."
 
2013-12-09 12:13:32 PM
"Scrooge's Sibling"?  yeah, y're a biatch.
I would wager Ted's had a bellyful of first-solid-stool to gold-star-at-preschool announcements from his over-involved sister.

oh, BTW; you sound fat.
 
2013-12-09 12:14:04 PM
So, let me get this straight, you're excluding the only childless couple from 4 other couples (and grandparents?), and you're expecting them to bear gifts for YOUR kids? If you wanted him to participate, why don't you get him a gift do he can open and feel a part of attention. Despite making more money now, I plan on sticking to my $20 gift limit per child, $30 adults (mom, dad, grab bag)
They know I'm better off now, but if they gripe, eff em...
Humans suck.
 
2013-12-09 12:14:17 PM

HailRobonia: The brother is forgetting that it his duty as a sibling to buy really noisy and annoying toys for his nieces and nephews. Or something easily broken with lots of little pieces that get underfoot.


I like your way of thinking.
 
2013-12-09 12:14:19 PM
Do I sense some unsatisifed entitlement mentality?
 
2013-12-09 12:16:05 PM

ElwoodCuse: HailRobonia: The brother is forgetting that it his duty as a sibling to buy really noisy and annoying toys for his nieces and nephews. Or something easily broken with lots of little pieces that get underfoot.

Lego. No better revenge than stepping on one of those without shoes on.



In Twilight of the Idols (1888), Nietzsche wrote "what does not kill me, makes me stronger."  He was able to say that because LEGO blocks weren't invented until 1949.
 
2013-12-09 12:18:49 PM
Farking hell. Between all of my wife's friends, there are a good dozen and a half or so kids that we're expected to buy presents for. Birthdays/holidays. And a good half of the parents are of this same mentality, being we don't have kids so we should be gifting more extravagantly.  Most of them are passive-agressive about it, but a couple are just real biatches about it, and we've more or less cut them out of our lives. Funny how they always pop up again around those birthdays and Christmas.
 
2013-12-09 12:19:23 PM
She must be a Democrat... Butthurt that a rich person isnt giving her free things.
 
2013-12-09 12:22:13 PM
My wife's aunt has the mental capacity of a 13-year old so we get her the same stuff year after year.


Buying a 16oz. bottle of glitter glue for a woman with a mustache will touch you in ways you never knew you could be touched, including all the bad ones.
 
2013-12-09 12:24:22 PM

Otto's_Jacket: My wife's aunt has the mental capacity of a 13-year old so we get her the same stuff year after year.


Buying a 16oz. bottle of glitter glue for a woman with a mustache will touch you in ways you never knew you could be touched, including all the bad ones.


Now a glittery mustache on mental patient really says Christmas to me.

/has mustache, mental issues but no glitter
 
2013-12-09 12:27:55 PM
Two sides to this - first, the woman in TFA does sound like an entitled biatch. Gifts aren't obligatory.

But uncle Ted, assuming he is as financially secure as the entitled biatch makes him out to be, and there's nothing else to the story, is kind of a dick for not buying his nieces and nephews Christmas presents.

The nieces and nephews are likely to notice that uncle Ted stiffed them. What does the mom say then? Lie: "He's having money problems? The truth: "He thinks other kids deserve his presents more than you", defer to them: "I don't know, why don't you ask him"?

Anyway, there's probably more to the story. I bet Ted isn't as flush with cash as his sister makes him out to be and this is his attempt to back out gracefully, which she should respect.
 
2013-12-09 12:30:24 PM

TheShavingofOccam123: Otto's_Jacket: My wife's aunt has the mental capacity of a 13-year old so we get her the same stuff year after year.


Buying a 16oz. bottle of glitter glue for a woman with a mustache will touch you in ways you never knew you could be touched, including all the bad ones.

Now a glittery mustache on mental patient really says Christmas to me.

/has mustache, mental issues but no glitter



All karma killing jokes aside, we really do enjoy buying her that kind of stuff because she appreciates it so much more than the so-called 'normal' people we buy things for.
 
2013-12-09 12:30:55 PM

HailRobonia: The brother is forgetting that it his duty as a sibling to buy really noisy and annoying toys for his nieces and nephews. Or something easily broken with lots of little pieces that get underfoot.


Godamnitsomuch this. I had the first kid, between my sister and I. At first she didn't realize what she was doing, then it became malicious haha. Her due date was a couple days ago and you can be damn sure the favor will be repaid and relished. Isn't making your siblings suffer under the guise of charity or celebration what the holidays are all about?

/the air powered ball spitting music nightmare box was plain evil. I could regift, since it's just a kids toy, but I want her to know I care enough to spend my hard earned money making her question life.
 
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