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(Business Insider)   Tons of exotic chicks totally want to crash on your couch and hook up with you for a couple of days, all you have to do is pay $25   (businessinsider.com) divider line 104
    More: Unlikely, face time, cesium  
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20735 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Dec 2013 at 11:11 PM (45 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



104 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-12-07 08:55:57 PM  
Does that come with lots of exotic STDs, too?
 
2013-12-07 09:50:03 PM  
Or murder you and steal your identity.
 
2013-12-07 09:51:05 PM  
They haven't seen my couch.  I assure you, they don't want to crash there.
 
2013-12-07 10:38:58 PM  
It's all fun and games until someone gets killed, a la the Craigs list killer
 
2013-12-07 11:10:41 PM  
This actually sounds like the kind of company I'd make up to win a "worst investment ever" contest.
 
2013-12-07 11:14:54 PM  
And use up all my toilet paper.
And eat all the food in my cupboards and fridge.
And download a bunch of crap on my WiFi.
And clog my Netflix queue with crap shows they'll never watch.
And make too much noise when I have work in the morning.

Oh, sure. This just sounds quacktastic.
 
2013-12-07 11:22:01 PM  
i.ytimg.com

can i get two chicks at once for $50
 
2013-12-07 11:23:32 PM  
My couch is reserved for my cat. Uh, dunno, maybe there is a lonely pussy out there who wants to play with this lonely pussy?
 
2013-12-07 11:23:50 PM  
Yeah. This is gonna work out so well.
www.furiouscinema.com
 
2013-12-07 11:25:06 PM  
gonna get me some couchgating....
 
2013-12-07 11:26:50 PM  
Must bring your own weapons I've done this only once.
 
2013-12-07 11:29:02 PM  

GreenAdder: And use up all my toilet paper.
And eat all the food in my cupboards and fridge.
And download a bunch of crap on my WiFi.
And clog my Netflix queue with crap shows they'll never watch.
And make too much noise when I have work in the morning.

Oh, sure. This just sounds quacktastic.


Sure. There are all those things you listed.

But, otoh, sex.

I think you have a losing argument.
 
2013-12-07 11:31:16 PM  
What's the name of the app? iRapeMe?
 
2013-12-07 11:31:38 PM  
What the "tons of chicks" might look like:

fc07.deviantart.com

Be careful what you wish for. Be even more careful how you wish for it.
 
2013-12-07 11:33:25 PM  
If I wanted to see tons of chicks on a couch, I'd watch "The View".
 
2013-12-07 11:35:03 PM  

Danger Avoid Death: What the "tons of chicks" might look like:

[fc07.deviantart.com image 850x566]

Be careful what you wish for. Be even more careful how you wish for it.


Must be spawning season, they're going back into the primeval waters to be fertilized. Probably by black fish.
 
2013-12-07 11:38:33 PM  
I'm not into chicks.  My couch looks ragged, but I have to say, it's extremely comfy, to the point that I sleep on it almost as often as I sleep in my bed, which is also extremely comfy.  So, that is to say, there's a 0% chance I'd pay some woman to sleep on it.  Now, attractive hairy men, the offer is open.  I won't pay for sex, but if you're hot enough, I might consider slipping you a few bucks to crash on my comfy couch.  As long as you aren't allergic to dog hair.
 
2013-12-07 11:41:54 PM  
Someday your children will ask "how did the great bedbug apocalypse of 2016 happen?" You have your answer
 
2013-12-07 11:45:42 PM  
Totally thought this would be an ad for ostrich farm start ups
 
2013-12-07 11:52:17 PM  
I'll waive the $25 fee if you have a health kidney or liver.
 
2013-12-07 11:54:06 PM  
"Does this couch smells like chloroform to you?"
 
2013-12-07 11:57:02 PM  
Somehow the reality never lives up to the fantasy.
 
2013-12-08 12:03:47 AM  

Oldiron_79: Must bring your own weapons I've done this only once.


Yes. Yes. But when will I be paid?!?
 
2013-12-08 12:04:25 AM  

wraith95: Totally thought this would be an ad for ostrich farm start ups


I was thinking peacock
 
2013-12-08 12:07:48 AM  
Does this ball gag taste funny to you?
 
2013-12-08 12:11:19 AM  
if the Old Lady ever found a hot chick I had paid sleeping on the couch my days would be numbered in single digits
 
2013-12-08 12:13:18 AM  
Hmmmm.....I wonder why the couchbangs.com site mentioned in TFA goes to a promo for Carrie Underwood's Sound of Music special...?  Carrie, is there something we should know?
 
2013-12-08 12:13:48 AM  
Exotic chicks, meaning Asian transvestites
 
2013-12-08 12:14:05 AM  

little big man: Hmmmm.....I wonder why the couchbangs.com site mentioned in TFA goes to a promo for Carrie Underwood's Sound of Music special...?  Carrie, is there something we should know?


I'll go ask her. She's on my couch.
 
2013-12-08 12:15:27 AM  

Pribar: if the Old Lady ever found a hot chick I had paid sleeping on the couch my days would be numbered in single digits


Jesus Christ, man, let the maid have her siesta.
 
2013-12-08 12:17:54 AM  
They left out the part where you wake up and all your shiat is gone.
 
2013-12-08 12:18:46 AM  
I don't get this.  We have two extra bedrooms in the house and when we tried to rent one, we didn't get anything except degenerate drug addicts who wanted to know if they could use our cars if we weren't using them.

Invite a total stranger into your house for three days and what's to stop them from cleaning you out while you're at work?
 
2013-12-08 12:20:44 AM  

new_york_monty: Pribar: if the Old Lady ever found a hot chick I had paid sleeping on the couch my days would be numbered in single digits

Jesus Christ, man, let the maid have her siesta.


The only maid we have is me with a apron and a feather duster...


/had to give up on the stockings, my hairy legs ripped em to shreds.
 
2013-12-08 12:21:36 AM  

Lsherm: I don't get this.  We have two extra bedrooms in the house and when we tried to rent one, we didn't get anything except degenerate drug addicts who wanted to know if they could use our cars if we weren't using them.

Invite a total stranger into your house for three days and what's to stop them from cleaning you out while you're at work?


You need to own cheap, heavy things and live in a fifth floor walk-up.
 
2013-12-08 12:23:58 AM  

new_york_monty: Lsherm: I don't get this.  We have two extra bedrooms in the house and when we tried to rent one, we didn't get anything except degenerate drug addicts who wanted to know if they could use our cars if we weren't using them.

Invite a total stranger into your house for three days and what's to stop them from cleaning you out while you're at work?

You need to own cheap, heavy things and live in a fifth floor walk-up.


They can still steal your laptop and iPhone!
 
2013-12-08 12:28:50 AM  
Something tells me my wife would be pissed if I signed up for this.
 
2013-12-08 12:37:35 AM  

Danger Avoid Death: little big man: Hmmmm.....I wonder why the couchbangs.com site mentioned in TFA goes to a promo for Carrie Underwood's Sound of Music special...?  Carrie, is there something we should know?

I'll go ask her. She's on my couch.


Well, after that performance, she had to go somewhere to cry.
 
2013-12-08 12:42:56 AM  

Danger Avoid Death: What the "tons of chicks" might look like:



Be careful what you wish for. Be even more careful how you wish for it.


They might like to play with my 12" pianist.
 
2013-12-08 12:45:48 AM  
img.fark.net

Thought those bottles of beer looked familiar.
 
2013-12-08 12:46:37 AM  

Prof. Frink: Danger Avoid Death: What the "tons of chicks" might look like:

Be careful what you wish for. Be even more careful how you wish for it.

They might like to play with my 12" pianist.


www.yanous.com
 
2013-12-08 12:47:25 AM  

Lsherm: I don't get this.  We have two extra bedrooms in the house and when we tried to rent one, we didn't get anything except degenerate drug addicts who wanted to know if they could use our cars if we weren't using them.

Invite a total stranger into your house for three days and what's to stop them from cleaning you out while you're at work?


Because his website is deep down really just a hookup service in disguise that specifically targets young travellers and immigrants.

It is a good plan. The type of girls who travel a lot or are recent immigrants who would accept sleeping over at a guys place usually mean that they dont have a bf, so your odds go up even if her original intentions wasnt looking to get farked.
 
2013-12-08 12:49:40 AM  
Gotta love those exotic chicks!

www.australiangeographic.com.au
 
2013-12-08 12:51:41 AM  

Lsherm: new_york_monty: Lsherm: I don't get this.  We have two extra bedrooms in the house and when we tried to rent one, we didn't get anything except degenerate drug addicts who wanted to know if they could use our cars if we weren't using them.

Invite a total stranger into your house for three days and what's to stop them from cleaning you out while you're at work?

You need to own cheap, heavy things and live in a fifth floor walk-up.

They can still steal your laptop and iPhone!


Take your phone to work with you, and downgrade the laptop to one of these bad boys

4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-12-08 01:00:39 AM  

Pribar: if the Old Lady ever found a hot chick I had paid sleeping on the couch my days would be numbered in single digits


What if the hot chick paid you for the use of your couch?
 
2013-12-08 01:03:30 AM  

anfrind: Pribar: if the Old Lady ever found a hot chick I had paid sleeping on the couch my days would be numbered in single digits

What if the hot chick paid you for the use of your couch?


What planet are you from? Hot chicks never pay for anything.
 
2013-12-08 01:14:59 AM  

anfrind: Pribar: if the Old Lady ever found a hot chick I had paid sleeping on the couch my days would be numbered in single digits

What if the hot chick paid you for the use of your couch?


His days would be numbered in single digits, and his bank account in double digits.
 
2013-12-08 01:18:34 AM  

Lsherm: new_york_monty: Lsherm: I don't get this.  We have two extra bedrooms in the house and when we tried to rent one, we didn't get anything except degenerate drug addicts who wanted to know if they could use our cars if we weren't using them.

Invite a total stranger into your house for three days and what's to stop them from cleaning you out while you're at work?

You need to own cheap, heavy things and live in a fifth floor walk-up.

They can still steal your laptop and iPhone!


Use a tether on your laptop. Why the hell are you leaving your iPhone at home when you go to work?
 
2013-12-08 01:20:28 AM  

Petroleum Oligarch: Lsherm: new_york_monty: Lsherm: I don't get this.  We have two extra bedrooms in the house and when we tried to rent one, we didn't get anything except degenerate drug addicts who wanted to know if they could use our cars if we weren't using them.

Invite a total stranger into your house for three days and what's to stop them from cleaning you out while you're at work?

You need to own cheap, heavy things and live in a fifth floor walk-up.

They can still steal your laptop and iPhone!

Take your phone to work with you, and downgrade the laptop to one of these bad boys

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 590x479]


My "if I was a meth addict, my copper theft radar just lit up" went to 12 just by looking at that in the provided context.  Before it was just an annoying pic, starting with having to wear a suit to do manual labor.
 
2013-12-08 01:22:24 AM  
Hey babe, my futon smells like rotten milk and piss.  I'll let you sleep on my bed which smells ONLY like piss, but ONLY on the left side, which I'll take.  Don't pay any attention to the baseball bat and rifle in the corner.  Lights out! Gnight!
 
2013-12-08 01:33:07 AM  

new_york_monty: Lsherm: new_york_monty: Lsherm: I don't get this.  We have two extra bedrooms in the house and when we tried to rent one, we didn't get anything except degenerate drug addicts who wanted to know if they could use our cars if we weren't using them.

Invite a total stranger into your house for three days and what's to stop them from cleaning you out while you're at work?

You need to own cheap, heavy things and live in a fifth floor walk-up.

They can still steal your laptop and iPhone!

Use a tether on your laptop. Why the hell are you leaving your iPhone at home when you go to work?


Why is someone in your home while you are at work? That's what this service is.
 
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