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(NPR)   How to bake the perfect cookie. Of course, there's science involved, but you'll be so distracted by the animated GIF, you won't care   (npr.org) divider line 91
    More: Spiffy, Animated GIF, Years Ago, baking powder, baking soda, The Salts  
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13947 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Dec 2013 at 2:40 PM (46 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



91 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-12-04 12:58:34 PM  
Well, it neglected to mention that while there are many cookie recipes from which to choose, the perfectly baked cookie will always consist of oatmeal, chocolate chips, and almonds. But other than, interesting.
 
2013-12-04 01:31:29 PM  

Pocket Ninja: Well, it neglected to mention that while there are many cookie recipes from which to choose, the perfectly baked cookie will always consist of oatmeal, chocolate chips, and almonds. But other than, interesting.



Nuts in chocolate chip cookies are an abomination. It's in The Bible and The Constitution.

/Study it out.
 
2013-12-04 01:34:08 PM  
The article didn't say anything about freebasing...

img.fark.net
 
2013-12-04 02:03:16 PM  
You know what else is good in cookies?
Pee
i.imgur.com s.
 
2013-12-04 02:18:21 PM  
Now I want to put on some heavy industrial music and bake the f*ck out of some cookies.

Oddly enough, this is not a particularly rare occurrence.
 
2013-12-04 02:44:13 PM  
Distracted by an animated gif?

 
2013-12-04 02:45:19 PM  
As a baker who baked perfect cookies, GIF FAIL.
Those are over cooked.
You want them at peak, not after collapse.
And use margarine, not butter if you want them moister, Butter, not margarine if you want them crispier,
and for the love of god, don't fark with them while they are cooling. Remove from tray while warm, not hot.
 
2013-12-04 02:46:56 PM  
thechive.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-12-04 02:47:43 PM  

Pocket Ninja: Well, it neglected to mention that while there are many cookie recipes from which to choose, the perfectly baked cookie will always consist of oatmeal, chocolate chips, and almonds. But other than, interesting.


I disagree. The. Best. Cookie. Is a shortbread, with coconut and caramel. Allow Martha Stewart to expand your cookie repertoire.
 
2013-12-04 02:47:47 PM  
I liked the gif.

I also bake some seriously good cookies.
 
2013-12-04 02:47:52 PM  

shanrick: You know what else is good in cookies?
Pee
[i.imgur.com image 572x382] s.


He should know.
l-userpic.livejournal.com
 
2013-12-04 02:48:02 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2013-12-04 02:49:19 PM  

foo monkey: [thechive.files.wordpress.com image 396x288]


HOW CAN ANYONE FIND HER SEXY WITH THAT BIG BOBBLE HEAD?

Ok, I'm kidding, she's attractive and all, but seriously, she has a HUGE head.
 
2013-12-04 02:53:09 PM  
Three words: Easy Bake Oven.

Nothing better than light bulb baking. It's almost fool-proof. For decades they sold tiny ovens to little girls so they could back tiny cakes for their older brothers to eat. If that doesn't make a feminist out of a girl, she's too dumb to blink and might as well run for President.

That reminds me. My sister is being courted by a political party to run for political office. She's had lots of experience dealing with difficult people (cough, cough, brother-in-law, cough, cough) and I think she'd do a good job. I'll let you know if she ever becomes Prime Minister of Canada, but hopefully she'll get a patronage job if she loses and won't have to be a politician. You can do a lot more good with a decent job than in the Legislature. Backbench politicians have absolutely no power, but people who work do. She's by no means as dumb as Palin or Malice Whatsherface there, although I suspect she's a lot more conservative than I am.

How do you like the sound of Brantgoose Beer? Would you drink Brantgoose Beer? What is the maximum and minimum percentage of alcohol by volume that you would like to see in Brantgoose Beer? Would you prefer Brantgoose Beer in cans or bottles? Brown, white or green glass?

That's the other sad thing about politics: you can choose your party but you can't choose your relatives.

Ha! ha!
 
2013-12-04 02:54:01 PM  
I for one welcome our baking cookie blob overlords.
 
2013-12-04 02:54:57 PM  

Satan's Bunny Slippers: foo monkey: [thechive.files.wordpress.com image 396x288]

HOW CAN ANYONE FIND HER SEXY WITH THAT BIG BOBBLE HEAD?

Ok, I'm kidding, she's attractive and all, but seriously, she has a HUGE head.


You were looking at her head?
 
2013-12-04 02:55:38 PM  

Satan's Bunny Slippers: foo monkey: [thechive.files.wordpress.com image 396x288]

HOW CAN ANYONE FIND HER SEXY WITH THAT BIG BOBBLE HEAD?

Ok, I'm kidding, she's attractive and all, but seriously, she has a HUGE head.


I'd still lick her like a lollipop, if you know what I mean.
 
2013-12-04 02:55:45 PM  
 
2013-12-04 02:55:55 PM  
The perfect cookies:

cbsq104.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-12-04 02:56:18 PM  

Pocket Ninja: Well, it neglected to mention that while there are many cookie recipes from which to choose, the perfectly baked cookie will always consist of oatmeal, chocolate chips, and almonds. But other than, interesting.


More specifically, Organic steel cut oats, chocolate chips made from organic, grass-fed cocoa trees, and free-range almonds which have been marinated in a vat of organic partially hydrogenated soybean oil.

Divine.
 
2013-12-04 02:56:56 PM  

brantgoose: Three words: Easy Bake Oven.

Nothing better than light bulb baking. It's almost fool-proof. For decades they sold tiny ovens to little girls so they could back tiny cakes for their older brothers to eat. If that doesn't make a feminist out of a girl, she's too dumb to blink and might as well run for President.

That reminds me. My sister is being courted by a political party to run for political office. She's had lots of experience dealing with difficult people (cough, cough, brother-in-law, cough, cough) and I think she'd do a good job. I'll let you know if she ever becomes Prime Minister of Canada, but hopefully she'll get a patronage job if she loses and won't have to be a politician. You can do a lot more good with a decent job than in the Legislature. Backbench politicians have absolutely no power, but people who work do. She's by no means as dumb as Palin or Malice Whatsherface there, although I suspect she's a lot more conservative than I am.

How do you like the sound of Brantgoose Beer? Would you drink Brantgoose Beer? What is the maximum and minimum percentage of alcohol by volume that you would like to see in Brantgoose Beer? Would you prefer Brantgoose Beer in cans or bottles? Brown, white or green glass?

That's the other sad thing about politics: you can choose your party but you can't choose your relatives.

Ha! ha!


 Actually, Brantgoose Beer has incredible brand name sound appeal.
 
2013-12-04 02:57:32 PM  

Eddie Adams from Torrance: Pocket Ninja: Well, it neglected to mention that while there are many cookie recipes from which to choose, the perfectly baked cookie will always consist of oatmeal, chocolate chips, and almonds. But other than, interesting.


Nuts in chocolate chip cookies are an abomination. It's in The Bible and The Constitution.

/Study it out.



Nuh-uh... I love walnuts in my chocolate chip cookies, I also like oatmeal but I like my oatmeal cookies with raisins, and maybe some chopped almond might not be bad, I'll have to try it.
 
2013-12-04 02:57:48 PM  
I'd rather have Schweddy Balls.
 
2013-12-04 02:58:25 PM  
Eddie Adams from Torrance: Nuts in chocolate chip cookies are an abomination. It's in The Bible and The Constitution.

Damn straight.

I have been telling that to my Wife for years.
 
2013-12-04 02:58:28 PM  

bdub77: Pocket Ninja: Well, it neglected to mention that while there are many cookie recipes from which to choose, the perfectly baked cookie will always consist of oatmeal, chocolate chips, and almonds. But other than, interesting.

More specifically, Organic steel cut oats, chocolate chips made from organic, grass-fed cocoa trees, and free-range almonds which have been marinated in a vat of organic partially hydrogenated soybean oil.

Divine.


Nice but where do you find organic steel?  I've been to Whole Paycheck.  They don't carry it.
 
2013-12-04 03:00:05 PM  
Damn, I was hoping that it was the Cookie Monster B-Day .gif
 
2013-12-04 03:00:18 PM  
Cookies are always best with ice cream img.fark.net
 
2013-12-04 03:00:28 PM  

brantgoose: Three words: Easy Bake Oven.

Nothing better than light bulb baking. It's almost fool-proof. For decades they sold tiny ovens to little girls so they could back tiny cakes for their older brothers to eat. If that doesn't make a feminist out of a girl, she's too dumb to blink and might as well run for President.

That reminds me. My sister is being courted by a political party to run for political office. She's had lots of experience dealing with difficult people (cough, cough, brother-in-law, cough, cough) and I think she'd do a good job. I'll let you know if she ever becomes Prime Minister of Canada, but hopefully she'll get a patronage job if she loses and won't have to be a politician. You can do a lot more good with a decent job than in the Legislature. Backbench politicians have absolutely no power, but people who work do. She's by no means as dumb as Palin or Malice Whatsherface there, although I suspect she's a lot more conservative than I am.

How do you like the sound of Brantgoose Beer? Would you drink Brantgoose Beer? What is the maximum and minimum percentage of alcohol by volume that you would like to see in Brantgoose Beer? Would you prefer Brantgoose Beer in cans or bottles? Brown, white or green glass?

That's the other sad thing about politics: you can choose your party but you can't choose your relatives.

Ha! ha!



You forgot to take your Concerta this morning, didn't you?
 
2013-12-04 03:01:50 PM  

Summoner101:

You were looking at her head?


Well, yeah, I don't bat for that team, so she doesn't do anything for me.  So, yes?

Except irritate me a little when she uses a fake Italian accent only for certain words.
 

DubtodaIll: Satan's Bunny Slippers: foo monkey: [thechive.files.wordpress.com image 396x288]

HOW CAN ANYONE FIND HER SEXY WITH THAT BIG BOBBLE HEAD?

Ok, I'm kidding, she's attractive and all, but seriously, she has a HUGE head.

I'd still lick her like a lollipop, if you know what I mean.


NTTAWWT  have at her!  =)
 
2013-12-04 03:05:49 PM  
TRIPLES in volume???? it just flattens out.
 
2013-12-04 03:07:51 PM  
Isn't that the same "gif" from Toll House cookies commercials in the 80"s?
 
2013-12-04 03:08:50 PM  
If you are making White Chocolate Chip cookies, I would highly recommend THESE
 
2013-12-04 03:09:34 PM  
I like using the Halloween candy the next day.  Butterfingers, snickers, whattchamacallits, scors, kitkats.  (I've also gone so far is to freeze Charteston Chews because in their frozen state they mix better and when baked melt into gooey pockets of marshmallow goodness.)  So, I just find a standard sugar cookie recipe, take out the sugar and add all those smashed candies.  It's quite outstanding, each bite is different.
 
2013-12-04 03:09:35 PM  
but Newtons are fruit and cake.
 
2013-12-04 03:10:44 PM  
How is cookkie formed?
 
2013-12-04 03:13:07 PM  
I've never really understood the difference between caramelization and the Maillard reaction. I kind of thought they were the same thing. Apparently they are not.

I do know this: Nuts or no nuts (no nuts), the greatest thing you can do for chocolate chip cookies is let the dough rest in the fridge overnight.
 
2013-12-04 03:16:13 PM  
 
2013-12-04 03:21:19 PM  
I thought the perfect Cookie was Cookie Mueller.

But she died of AIDs-related causes.

Which brings me to my second favorite cookie from "Sweet Smell of Success"

I'd hate to take a bite out of you, you're a cookie full of arsenic.
 
2013-12-04 03:22:56 PM  
Flat and crispy cookies? Screw that. The best cookies are thick and chewy, may optionally include: oatmeal, raisins, chocolate chips, M&Ms, Reese's Pieces, white chocolate chips. Mine are as thick as I want, they generally stay however thick I place them on the tray for cooking.
 
2013-12-04 03:23:40 PM  

someonelse: I've never really understood the difference between caramelization and the Maillard reaction. I kind of thought they were the same thing. Apparently they are not.

I do know this: Nuts or no nuts (no nuts), the greatest thing you can do for chocolate chip cookies is let the dough rest in the fridge overnight.


True!
 
2013-12-04 03:26:20 PM  

Pocket Ninja: Well, it neglected to mention that while there are many cookie recipes from which to choose, the perfectly baked cookie will always consist of oatmeal, chocolate chips, and almonds. But other than, interesting.


Heresy! I baked some cookies last night from a recipe labeled "Fudgy Chocolate Drops", except at the last minute I added two teaspoons of a cocoa/cinnamon blend I had in the pantry. The cookies baked into little round shapes about 1.5" across and about 1/2" thick, with big cracks over the top. They were chewy, chocolaty with a bite of cinnamon; my wife's coworkers were raving over them at lunch today.

/have a recipe book of about 200 cookie/brownie recipes
//which I then tweak like TFA talked about
///also have a cocoa/cayenne pepper blend
 
2013-12-04 03:27:03 PM  
Well, I guess the chocolate chunk cookies, oatmeal-raisin cookies, M&M cookies, and white chocolate macadamia cookies that I baked will have to be disposed of immediately, as they are not perfect enough.
 
2013-12-04 03:28:09 PM  
I'm baking cookies right now, so I'm getting a kick out of this.

/seriously
//off to grease the cookie sheet after I hit "add comment"
 
2013-12-04 03:28:33 PM  
Ctrl-f Alton
Very good, as you were peasants. No other cookie recipe matters except these three.
 
2013-12-04 03:29:39 PM  

saintstryfe: Alton went over this in another episode all ready.


I went to high school with "Marsha"

/csb
 
2013-12-04 03:31:19 PM  
I can't even read the article, I just keep watching the GIF.
 
2013-12-04 03:31:51 PM  

vudukungfu: If you are making White Chocolate Chip cookies, I would highly recommend THESE


I use either the Ghiradelli or Nestles white chips, but prefer the former when I have them. Bakers was ok but I couldn't rely on it to melt properly every time when I was making a white chocolate cheesecake or wanted white chocolate to drizzle on something.
 
2013-12-04 03:34:38 PM  

dj_spanmaster: The best cookies are thick and chewy

The best cookies are thick and chewy
The best cookies are thick and chewy
 
2013-12-04 03:34:54 PM  
Wanna come upstairs and see my cookie cutters?

/uncut cookies are gross
 
2013-12-04 03:36:17 PM  

CygnusDarius: I'll just leave this here.


Heh; I've made a cookie from a similar recipe, but used a fully alkalized cocoa called "black onyx" in it instead of the Dutch cocoa. The cookie turned black with the chunks in it, and if you didn't have a big glass of milk at hand you would nearly have a panic attack.

http://www.savo ryspiceshop.com/spices/cocoablk.html
 
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