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(Huffington Post)   Old and busted: Christian science quiz says humans and dinosaurs lived side by side. New hotness: Christian science quiz says gravity can't be explained by atheists   (m.huffpost.com) divider line 158
    More: Asinine, god, Advil, BRCA, lessons, gravity  
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2164 clicks; posted to Politics » on 04 Dec 2013 at 7:28 AM (19 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-12-03 11:57:06 PM
Christian science quiz says gravity can't be explained by atheists

There is no gravity, religious dogma sucks.
 
2013-12-04 12:02:50 AM
Wow the stupid hurts.
 
2013-12-04 12:04:40 AM
"Christian science" is the mother of all oxymorons
 
2013-12-04 12:14:59 AM
ball goes up, ball comes down. you can't explain that.
 
2013-12-04 12:25:24 AM
 
2013-12-04 12:27:48 AM
Stupid Christians forgot all about the aether. Find the answers to that in Genesis, you fundie troll.
 
2013-12-04 12:30:52 AM

Sgt Otter: Courtesy of The Onion:

Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling' Theory


You joke, but evangelicals have been promoting the idea that strong and weak forces are Jesus keeping the atom together for a while.

media.chick.com

/hot from a Chick comic called "Big Daddy"
 
2013-12-04 01:39:42 AM
Newton is clawing his way above ground to smack the shiat out of these dipshiats.
 
2013-12-04 07:11:39 AM

Sudo_Make_Me_A_Sandwich: Sgt Otter: Courtesy of The Onion:

Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling' Theory

You joke, but evangelicals have been promoting the idea that strong and weak forces are Jesus keeping the atom together for a while.

[media.chick.com image 468x240]

/hot from a Chick comic called "Big Daddy"


Farking magnets, how do they work.
 
2013-12-04 07:30:17 AM
It's kind of fitting that we need to have a discussion on gravity--assuming such a thing even exists--in order to see how far liberals have fallen.
 
2013-12-04 07:35:47 AM
Saw that on Reddit.  Assumed it was a fake.  Usually creationists don't bother with gravity; Newton was a Christian after all.
 
2013-12-04 07:38:11 AM
I didn't think gravy was an religious issue
 
2013-12-04 07:38:34 AM
This is another Onion article mistaken for real (again), isn't it?
 
2013-12-04 07:39:22 AM
I really misread that headline.  Maybe no one will notice.
 
2013-12-04 07:41:29 AM
Did God create life on other planets?
 
2013-12-04 07:41:37 AM
I don't like gravity. It's such a downer.
 
2013-12-04 07:43:23 AM
They're not entirely wrong, despite being abysmally f*cking stupid and wrong most of the time.  We can model gravity with great precision, but where the force comes from, exactly...that's another story.  We know it exists, we know how to model it, but we don't know how the underlying mechanism works.
 
2013-12-04 07:46:49 AM
Gravity is only a theory.
 
2013-12-04 07:46:49 AM

ThunderPelvis: They're not entirely wrong, despite being abysmally f*cking stupid and wrong most of the time.  We can model gravity with great precision, but where the force comes from, exactly...that's another story.  We know it exists, we know how to model it, but we don't know how the underlying mechanism works.


Actually, we do.
We're just not telling you.
 
2013-12-04 07:47:28 AM

Muta: I really misread that headline.  Maybe no one will notice.


They'll get to gravy soon enough at the rate they're going.

...and the lord said "behold, look again at the jar of water", and Muta did turn see that the water had turned into gravy.

That's how gravy is made.

/That just gave me an idea as to how Jesus might genuinely have done the water->wine trick.
 
2013-12-04 07:47:34 AM

FlameDuck: I don't like gravity. It's such a downer.


We should rename it Debbie.
 
2013-12-04 07:48:45 AM
Without Fail:
Actually, we do.
We're just not telling you.


Fine, BE THAT WAY.
 
2013-12-04 07:50:01 AM
"God did it" is not a better scientific explanation than "It just is".
 
2013-12-04 07:53:17 AM

ThunderPelvis: Without Fail:
Actually, we do.
We're just not telling you.

Fine, BE THAT WAY.


Don't feel bad. They won't tell me, either.

Jerks.
 
2013-12-04 07:53:48 AM
FTFQuiz: Gravity is the force that b. holds the sun, moon, and planets in place.

*twitch*

Am I just misremembering how things were explained to me as a child, or does that seem like a poor explanation of gravity for a third grade classroom? Like, I know plenty of complex concepts do get explained in a technically wrong manner for fear that trying to explain the actual exact information would be too hard for kids to understand and the incorrect definition is close enough for most real world applications (see: matter being explained as anything that has volume and mass). That said, I can only remember being disabused of the notion gravity holds anything in place: it actually causes everything to move in relation to each other.
 
2013-12-04 07:54:28 AM
d2oadd98wnjs7n.cloudfront.net

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-12-04 07:56:17 AM

ThunderPelvis: They're not entirely wrong, despite being abysmally f*cking stupid and wrong most of the time.  We can model gravity with great precision, but where the force comes from, exactly...that's another story.  We know it exists, we know how to model it, but we don't know how the underlying mechanism works.


Insane Clown Posse should have gone with "farking gravity, how does it work!". Since we do know why magnets work.
 
2013-12-04 07:58:16 AM
You know what?  Why should science, and those of us scientifically inclined, bother arguing?  Firstly, we stand no chance of "winning" or convincing them of their ignorance.  But more importantly, the stupider they are, the smarter the rest of us appear, making us more valuable to our employers and more attractive to similarly well-adjusted suitors.
 
2013-12-04 07:58:24 AM

Grungehamster: FTFQuiz: Gravity is the force that b. holds the sun, moon, and planets in place.

*twitch*

Am I just misremembering how things were explained to me as a child, or does that seem like a poor explanation of gravity for a third grade classroom? Like, I know plenty of complex concepts do get explained in a technically wrong manner for fear that trying to explain the actual exact information would be too hard for kids to understand and the incorrect definition is close enough for most real world applications (see: matter being explained as anything that has volume and mass). That said, I can only remember being disabused of the notion gravity holds anything in place: it actually causes everything to move in relation to each other.


Your twitchiness is correct.  It doesn't hold anything in place, that's a profoundly moronic statement.  It does hold planets and such in their respective orbits.

Fun fact:  we're actually in free fall toward the sun.  Sleep tight.

/jerk
 
2013-12-04 07:59:20 AM

eraser8: ThunderPelvis: Without Fail:
Actually, we do.
We're just not telling you.

Fine, BE THAT WAY.

Don't feel bad. They won't tell me, either.

Jerks.


I hate those jerks.
 
2013-12-04 08:00:37 AM
Oh, and add me to the "if you won't name what school this was at, I am suspicious this was all some troll with an ink jet and too much time on their hands" crowd. Then again, I assumed that was the case with the "man lived with dinosaurs" quiz, and the guy ended up revealing the source and it was legit.
 
2013-12-04 08:01:51 AM
badhatharry:

Insane Clown Posse should have gone with "farking gravity, how does it work!". Since we do know why magnets work.

It's possible to have a profound thought and express it in a profoundly stupid way.

i0.kym-cdn.com
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-12-04 08:02:15 AM
Living in a world that is just FULL of complex ideas and science must be terrifying for these people.  At least that is what it seems like.  I keep trying to figure out how we've got such a surge of derperism going on in the U.S. right now and I keep coming back to that thought.

It's "I refuse to even think of anything like complex physics because life shouldn't be sooo hard!  I'll just deny anything outside my base understanding even exists and say jebus did it!"
 
2013-12-04 08:05:57 AM
Best part:  the correct answer to the final question of who created gravity is not only "God", but specifically "our God".

This very literally gives me the creeps.
 
2013-12-04 08:08:08 AM
It's the curvature of space time caused by mass. What do I win?
 
2013-12-04 08:08:15 AM
img.fark.net
 
2013-12-04 08:09:04 AM
Until gravity can be explained, Jesus is placeholder
 
2013-12-04 08:09:21 AM

Grungehamster: FTFQuiz: Gravity is the force that b. holds the sun, moon, and planets in place.

*twitch*

Am I just misremembering how things were explained to me as a child, or does that seem like a poor explanation of gravity for a third grade classroom? Like, I know plenty of complex concepts do get explained in a technically wrong manner for fear that trying to explain the actual exact information would be too hard for kids to understand and the incorrect definition is close enough for most real world applications (see: matter being explained as anything that has volume and mass). That said, I can only remember being disabused of the notion gravity holds anything in place: it actually causes everything to move in relation to each other.


One wonders how Christians might react if science teachers started handing out theology "quizzes" to their students that grossly misrepresented Christians' views. I have the sneaking suspicion they would not take it particularly well.
 
2013-12-04 08:10:27 AM
The most-searched word on Merriam-Webster's online dictionary this year was "science" -- I can only assume said searches were by fundies who got lost on the way to Grind Google and the autocomplete box reading "Science...is a liberal plot that makes Baby Jesus cry"
 
2013-12-04 08:12:03 AM

HooskerDoo: [img.fark.net image 592x720]


That's gotta be satire.

Nobody is that stupid in real life.
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-12-04 08:14:38 AM

HooskerDoo: [img.fark.net image 592x720]


Christians are so righteous that they don't piss.
 
2013-12-04 08:15:15 AM

badhatharry: "God did it" is not a better scientific explanation than "It just is".


*facepalm*
 
2013-12-04 08:16:02 AM
If indeed real

Oh boy, another article about an internet post.

This thread's going to get pretty large, so maybe I'll come back when the "smartest" and "funniest" posts start filling up and write an article summarizing it.  Then I can submit that article and my resume to HuffPo.
 
2013-12-04 08:16:27 AM

eraser8: HooskerDoo: [img.fark.net image 592x720]

That's gotta be satire.

Nobody is that stupid in real life.


Hey now...let's give the fundies their due.  Remember, these poor bastards have never seen a real science or math textbook.
 
2013-12-04 08:17:11 AM

HooskerDoo: [img.fark.net image 592x720]


Nice. :D
 
2013-12-04 08:17:30 AM

Poopspasm: It's the curvature of space time caused by mass. What do I win?


Why does mass cause a curvature in space time? Gravity!
 
2013-12-04 08:19:25 AM
They're right, we don't have a full explanation of gravity.... Yet.

The difference is that the search for that answer actually informs our understanding of the universe. Simply throwing up your hands with a "God did it" is utterly useless.

/I'm a Christian.
//Personally, I think a full understanding of the mechanisms of the universe informs our understanding of God.
///That goes for evolution, physics, psychology, the whole lot
////Yeah, it's sorta like hedging your bets
 
2013-12-04 08:19:26 AM

HooskerDoo: [img.fark.net image 592x720]


Randall Munroe just accidently debunked this: humans haven't drank a fraction of the water on the planet.

http://what-if.xkcd.com/74/

You are getting some velociraptor backwash in every sip though.
 
2013-12-04 08:20:51 AM

badhatharry: "God did it" is not a better scientific explanation than "It just is".


It's not even a scientific explanation at all, because it bypasses the null hypothesis.  The default position of science is "I don't know", and then it designs experiments to see if there's anything that reliably explains something better than "I don't know".  The default position of religion is "God did it", and since to them there is no better explanation than that, they don't pursue it any further.  They both start you at a position that has zero explanatory value, it's just that one acknowledges it's an unfulfilling placeholder to drive you to explore, while the other dresses it up as the ultimate answer to everything that requires no further scrutiny.

It's like two kids taking a multiple-choice test.  One kid blows through the whole thing and answers every question randomly and gets a 25%.  The other kid takes her time and answers every question correctly, but only manages to finish 75% of the test.  The first kid then goes around claiming he did better because he has an answer for question 90 while the second kid doesn't.
 
2013-12-04 08:22:08 AM
TFA suggests an upgrade to the img.fark.com tag may be in order.
 
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