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(Celebslam)   5'2" Hayden Panettiere says she's marrying 6'6" Wladimir Klitschko because she wants normal-sized kids. Yep, math works out   (celebslam.celebuzz.com) divider line 138
    More: Interesting, Hayden Panettiere, Wladimir Klitschko, Ellen Degeneres  
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5492 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 03 Dec 2013 at 1:58 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-12-03 06:47:09 PM  
I once dated a gril a foot shorter than I was.  Hated it.  I felt like I was was going out with a child who literally had to stand a few steps up just to make out.

And farking someone that tiny--how is it romantic having her head in your arm pit?
 
2013-12-03 06:49:20 PM  

TheGhostofFarkPast: Didn't Robert Downey Jr make the remark that Hayden's mom turned her into a prostitute for the people in the hollywood elite?I wouldn't be surprised she seems kind of crazy every time I have heard her talk.



Yeah--whatever happened about that?  Is it considered true, or a joke that went sideways?
 
2013-12-03 07:02:03 PM  

fickenchucker: TheGhostofFarkPast: Didn't Robert Downey Jr make the remark that Hayden's mom turned her into a prostitute for the people in the hollywood elite?I wouldn't be surprised she seems kind of crazy every time I have heard her talk.


Yeah--whatever happened about that?  Is it considered true, or a joke that went sideways?


A lot of child stars are abused on one way or another in a sexual manner.  It's considered distinctly possible in this case.


Whatever the case, she's a lot less screwed up than most, so good on her.  So many are really farked in the head.

It may not even have been a lot of abuse(or any actual abuse), but constant sickening of working with leering old men and the like who were just a bit too friendly(but never actually did anything, not necessarily for lack of trying).  Doesn't take much to screw up a kid.

I'm pretty sure that's what happened with Bynes.  She was actually pretty, and it got her the wrong kind of attention, so she made herself ugly.
 
2013-12-03 07:17:55 PM  
I'd give her my normal size penis, if ya know what I mean
 
2013-12-03 07:44:39 PM  
s1.ibtimes.com
 
2013-12-03 08:06:36 PM  
www.myteespot.com
 
2013-12-03 08:20:11 PM  

forgotmydamnusername: Rent Party: Which one of them beat the crap out of Lennox Lewis?   That was probably the last great heavyweight fight I've seen.

I hope that's this guy.

His older brother, Vtali. He's an order of magnitude harder than Wladimir. Lennox Lewis beat the crap out of Vitali, too. The Klitschko brother lost that one on cuts. Most heavywieghts getting caught flush by the bombs either guy was throwing would have instantly gone to sleep. This includes little brother, who has been KTFO by 3 guys who were only a shade better than journeymen.


Lewis got creamed in that fight.   Vitali was killing him.  Lewis was damn near crying during the post bout interview.  The only thing that stopped it was the cut over Vitali's eye, and no one but the official thought it was that bad.
 
2013-12-03 08:31:26 PM  
This thread needs more of that dude she's marrying.
 
2013-12-03 09:11:17 PM  

Rent Party: forgotmydamnusername: Rent Party: Which one of them beat the crap out of Lennox Lewis?   That was probably the last great heavyweight fight I've seen.

I hope that's this guy.

His older brother, Vtali. He's an order of magnitude harder than Wladimir. Lennox Lewis beat the crap out of Vitali, too. The Klitschko brother lost that one on cuts. Most heavywieghts getting caught flush by the bombs either guy was throwing would have instantly gone to sleep. This includes little brother, who has been KTFO by 3 guys who were only a shade better than journeymen.

Lewis got creamed in that fight.   Vitali was killing him.  Lewis was damn near crying during the post bout interview.  The only thing that stopped it was the cut over Vitali's eye, and no one but the official thought it was that bad.


You can find the fight on youtube. Watch it again. Klitschko won every round but the last, which might have been even, but he did get caught with some big shots, even so. I've seen fights stopped for cuts noticeably less bad than that, too. It ain't the 1950s, when Marciano fought most of a title fight with his nose literally split in half.
 
2013-12-03 09:41:16 PM  
she sounds stupid, i'd be sick of her in 24 hours

seriously, a boob job at that age when you're already beautiful?
i couldn't handle the insecurity of such a bimbette
 
2013-12-03 10:10:21 PM  

mediablitz: As a 6'3" man who dated a 4'11" woman, I can appreciate certain advantages to the difference in height...


Did she have a flat spot on her head where you could rest your beer?
 
2013-12-03 10:15:27 PM  

forgotmydamnusername: Rent Party: forgotmydamnusername: Rent Party: Which one of them beat the crap out of Lennox Lewis?   That was probably the last great heavyweight fight I've seen.

I hope that's this guy.

His older brother, Vtali. He's an order of magnitude harder than Wladimir. Lennox Lewis beat the crap out of Vitali, too. The Klitschko brother lost that one on cuts. Most heavywieghts getting caught flush by the bombs either guy was throwing would have instantly gone to sleep. This includes little brother, who has been KTFO by 3 guys who were only a shade better than journeymen.

Lewis got creamed in that fight.   Vitali was killing him.  Lewis was damn near crying during the post bout interview.  The only thing that stopped it was the cut over Vitali's eye, and no one but the official thought it was that bad.

You can find the fight on youtube. Watch it again. Klitschko won every round but the last, which might have been even, but he did get caught with some big shots, even so. I've seen fights stopped for cuts noticeably less bad than that, too. It ain't the 1950s, when Marciano fought most of a title fight with his nose literally split in half.


Was that against Ezzard Charles?

He was my dad's favorite boxer. Even named a cat after him.
 
2013-12-03 10:43:12 PM  

Wellon Dowd: Worst. Boob job. Ever.[i.imgur.com image 445x650][i.imgur.com image 374x650]


It's sad, because they were pretty darn cute before.  Bigger does not necessarily mean better.  On that stature of body, Jennifer Aniston tits are perfect, and that's what Hayden used to have.  I don't know what she was thinking.
 
2013-12-03 11:07:52 PM  

forgotmydamnusername: Rent Party: forgotmydamnusername: Rent Party: Which one of them beat the crap out of Lennox Lewis?   That was probably the last great heavyweight fight I've seen.

I hope that's this guy.

His older brother, Vtali. He's an order of magnitude harder than Wladimir. Lennox Lewis beat the crap out of Vitali, too. The Klitschko brother lost that one on cuts. Most heavywieghts getting caught flush by the bombs either guy was throwing would have instantly gone to sleep. This includes little brother, who has been KTFO by 3 guys who were only a shade better than journeymen.

Lewis got creamed in that fight.   Vitali was killing him.  Lewis was damn near crying during the post bout interview.  The only thing that stopped it was the cut over Vitali's eye, and no one but the official thought it was that bad.

You can find the fight on youtube. Watch it again. Klitschko won every round but the last, which might have been even, but he did get caught with some big shots, even so. I've seen fights stopped for cuts noticeably less bad than that, too. It ain't the 1950s, when Marciano fought most of a title fight with his nose literally split in half.


Oh sure, I'm not knocking Lewis at all.  I'm just saying Klitchko kicked his ass that night.  :D

Off to Youtube...
 
2013-12-03 11:50:54 PM  

Suckmaster Burstingfoam: forgotmydamnusername: Rent Party: forgotmydamnusername: Rent Party: Which one of them beat the crap out of Lennox Lewis?   That was probably the last great heavyweight fight I've seen.

I hope that's this guy.

His older brother, Vtali. He's an order of magnitude harder than Wladimir. Lennox Lewis beat the crap out of Vitali, too. The Klitschko brother lost that one on cuts. Most heavywieghts getting caught flush by the bombs either guy was throwing would have instantly gone to sleep. This includes little brother, who has been KTFO by 3 guys who were only a shade better than journeymen.

Lewis got creamed in that fight.   Vitali was killing him.  Lewis was damn near crying during the post bout interview.  The only thing that stopped it was the cut over Vitali's eye, and no one but the official thought it was that bad.

You can find the fight on youtube. Watch it again. Klitschko won every round but the last, which might have been even, but he did get caught with some big shots, even so. I've seen fights stopped for cuts noticeably less bad than that, too. It ain't the 1950s, when Marciano fought most of a title fight with his nose literally split in half.

Was that against Ezzard Charles?

He was my dad's favorite boxer. Even named a cat after him.


The second Ezzard Charles fight. If his defense had been a little tighter, Charles would have won the second fight for sure, and maybe even the first. As it was, Marciano got inside a little too often, and you couldn't win like that. Of course, in 49 tries, nobody else managed to keep Marciano from doing that, either.
 
2013-12-03 11:52:11 PM  

mediablitz: As a 6'3" man who dated a 4'11" woman, I can appreciate certain advantages to the difference in height...




Yeah, I'm 6'3", and my one girlfriend many years ago was probably only 5'2". She was great. She seemed to get off on how much bigger and stronger I was than her. The way I could just grab her hands with one hand, and tickle her while she was completely helpless. Good times while they lasted...
 
2013-12-04 01:13:44 AM  
i2.kym-cdn.com
PROCREATION DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY!!!

I'm 5'9", and my wife is six feet tall.  Our three-and-a-half year old is already fitting in size 6/7 clothing and wears a size 1 shoe.  Our youngest is a wee bit smaller than her oldest sister was at 21 months.
 
2013-12-04 01:32:59 AM  
She just wants a really big cock! Nothing wrong with that! Just being truthful here.

I saw the pictures and the thought of the acrobatics with a size difference of that much... It would be like a ride, a really.........um, fun ride. Actually my husband is the shortest guy I ever dated, I like tall men. All the others were....tall.

I'm five foot two, my old man is five seven, five eight. Our oldest, she barely made it to five foot even and our son is five six. I've always thought some things are random. In my family we ran the gamut from very tall to very short.

Most of the time you get familial looks in some way, certain eye, hair or skin coloring, especially if there are strong ethnic features. Yes, sometimes height can be a family trait, either many rather tall or many quite short. I know families that are from one extreme to the other.
 
2013-12-04 02:01:00 AM  
Her vagina's gonna look like a subway tunnel, and probably have the same number of rats living in it...
 
2013-12-04 02:10:57 AM  
"5'2" Hayden Panettiere tells Ellen DeGeneres that her main motivation behind marrying 6'6" boxing pro Wladimir Klitschko is because he's hung like a Siberian Musk Deer. "

They could have just stopped the article at that point.  All the truth you needed to know is in that sentence right there.
 
2013-12-04 02:20:05 AM  
I used to have a college friend who was 4'9".  Being 6'1", I'd drop down on one knee to give her a hug.  She was a redhead, and for Halloween liked to dress up in a Starfleet uniform as a miniature Beverly Crusher.

Nah, we didn't do anything.  She had a boyfriend before I met her, and she eventually married him.  I think he was 5'4" or less himself.
 
2013-12-04 02:22:24 AM  

OK So Amuse Me: She just wants a really big cock! Nothing wrong with that! Just being truthful here.

I saw the pictures and the thought of the acrobatics with a size difference of that much... It would be like a ride, a really.........um, fun ride. Actually my husband is the shortest guy I ever dated, I like tall men. All the others were....tall.

I'm five foot two, my old man is five seven, five eight. Our oldest, she barely made it to five foot even and our son is five six. I've always thought some things are random. In my family we ran the gamut from very tall to very short.

Most of the time you get familial looks in some way, certain eye, hair or skin coloring, especially if there are strong ethnic features. Yes, sometimes height can be a family trait, either many rather tall or many quite short. I know families that are from one extreme to the other.


Who in your family was tall? Your post doesn't make that clear.
 
2013-12-04 03:12:59 AM  
Echoing what the other tall farkers have said.

At 6'6" I've dated my fair share of 4'11-5'3" women.
Don't see much what's wrong in their height difference.

The woman not having too much going for her, is another story.
 
2013-12-04 07:41:10 AM  
That lucky son of a b*tch
 
2013-12-04 08:01:47 AM  

bulok: I can totally see where she's coming from.

I am 5'3" and my wife is 5'9". I exclusively dated taller girls for this exact same reason (unfortunately this also meant I could never date other Asians).

My son, who is 11 months old was born 2lbs heavier than I was and has been consistently on the 65th percentile with height which makes me very happy.

I don't care whether he would be tall enough to play basketball or whatever, I would just like for him to be normal/average. As it is, even if he were he would still get slack for being the shortest but eugenics isn't done in one generation.


Why does it matter, l'il dad? You're breathing proof that even little dudes can still get some beaver.
 
2013-12-04 08:47:28 AM  

CigaretteSmokingMan: I'll bet she ends up screaming for a c-section.


Unlikely...not impossible but unlikely.

6'4" Farker here, married to a 5'4" hell-of-a-woman. Tall runs in my family, it doesn't in hers.

When I was born, I was 10lbs 7oz. Our son: a pretty average 7lbs and change.

However, at 14 he's over 6'2" tall. At his age I was nowhere near that height and I had a pretty decent middle-class, good nutritioned upbringing.

So ya, who knows which way it could go. But getting there is half all the fun :)
 
2013-12-04 08:48:35 AM  

gryhnd: But getting there is half all the fun :)


That should have been "But getting there is half all the fun :) "
 
2013-12-04 08:51:27 AM  

bluorangefyre: PROCREATION DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY!!!

I'm 5'9", and my wife is six feet tall.  Our three-and-a-half year old is already fitting in size 6/7 clothing and wears a size 1 shoe.  Our youngest is a wee bit smaller than her oldest sister was at 21 months.


See my previous post. Procreation most certainly CAN work that way. At 6' your wife is well above average for a woman, and at 5'9 you're right about average. Between the two of you, you have plenty of height genes to pass on to your offspring. If they happen to get all the tall genes, your kids will be tall.

When you have two extremes like Hayden and her hubby, odds are good that the kid ends up somewhere in the middle, but it's not out of the question that it will be more to one extreme.

Science!
 
2013-12-04 09:22:32 AM  

Fano: KWess: I sat in the Lufthansa lounge with him in the Detroit airport.  I didn't immediately realize who it was, but I remember thinking 'who is that giant?'

His fists looked like cinder blocks made of ham.

Thank you for helping me to finish my detective novel. "As he pummelled me, his fists rained down like a downpour of cinderblocks made of ham. He was playing a Concerto in Pain, Fist major."


That's bloody awesome.
 
2013-12-04 11:14:21 AM  
Toit like a toiger!
 
2013-12-04 01:00:08 PM  

FarkingReading: This is what happens to her every time they get it on:

[img.fark.net image 194x259]


She even gets her dick ripped in half?
 
2013-12-04 02:20:42 PM  

cygnusx13: bulok: I can totally see where she's coming from.

I am 5'3" and my wife is 5'9". I exclusively dated taller girls for this exact same reason (unfortunately this also meant I could never date other Asians).

My son, who is 11 months old was born 2lbs heavier than I was and has been consistently on the 65th percentile with height which makes me very happy.

I don't care whether he would be tall enough to play basketball or whatever, I would just like for him to be normal/average. As it is, even if he were he would still get slack for being the shortest but eugenics isn't done in one generation.

Why does it matter, l'il dad? You're breathing proof that even little dudes can still get some beaver.


LOL nothing to do with getting beaver, my cousin (in grey) who is not much taller than me does even better with the ladies (the one in the pic is not as hot as his current gf). It's not really the height but it's all about the game. My main gripe is needing a foot stool every time I need to reach something. It just gets frustrating, plus a man of my impressive girth has problems finding clothes my size for my height. Don't want my kid having the same issues

img.fark.net
 
2013-12-04 02:38:25 PM  

TeddyRooseveltsMustache: Her vagina's gonna look like a subway tunnel, and probably have the same number of rats living in it...


I think it's funny that people assume that just because a guy is really big, that must mean his equipment is big, too.

I have it on good authority that this is not the case. In fact, more often than not the big guys have little peckers; And they get smaller when they get musclebound or do steroids, like many of these athletes do.

Or to sum up:

klipd.com
 
2013-12-04 02:39:38 PM  

Suckmaster Burstingfoam: forgotmydamnusername: Rent Party: forgotmydamnusername: Rent Party: Which one of them beat the crap out of Lennox Lewis?   That was probably the last great heavyweight fight I've seen.

I hope that's this guy.

His older brother, Vtali. He's an order of magnitude harder than Wladimir. Lennox Lewis beat the crap out of Vitali, too. The Klitschko brother lost that one on cuts. Most heavywieghts getting caught flush by the bombs either guy was throwing would have instantly gone to sleep. This includes little brother, who has been KTFO by 3 guys who were only a shade better than journeymen.

Lewis got creamed in that fight.   Vitali was killing him.  Lewis was damn near crying during the post bout interview.  The only thing that stopped it was the cut over Vitali's eye, and no one but the official thought it was that bad.

You can find the fight on youtube. Watch it again. Klitschko won every round but the last, which might have been even, but he did get caught with some big shots, even so. I've seen fights stopped for cuts noticeably less bad than that, too. It ain't the 1950s, when Marciano fought most of a title fight with his nose literally split in half.

Was that against Ezzard Charles?

He was my dad's favorite boxer. Even named a cat after him.


The first time my parents - who are Scottish - came to visit me in Cincinnati, they had to take a cab from their hotel to my apartment. The taxi driver took them along Ezzard Charles Drive. My dad asked the cab driver, a black guy, who Ezzard Charles was.

'Farked if I know' came the response.

/did not rip dad off
 
2013-12-04 03:38:19 PM  

TheEdibleSnuggie: "5'2" Hayden Panettiere tells Ellen DeGeneres that her main motivation behind marrying 6'6" boxing pro Wladimir Klitschko is because he's hung like a Siberian Musk Deer. "

They could have just stopped the article at that point.  All the truth you needed to know is in that sentence right there.


Ah, I see. She's his beard.
 
2013-12-04 04:51:02 PM  

bulok: cygnusx13: bulok: I can totally see where she's coming from.

I am 5'3" and my wife is 5'9". I exclusively dated taller girls for this exact same reason (unfortunately this also meant I could never date other Asians).

My son, who is 11 months old was born 2lbs heavier than I was and has been consistently on the 65th percentile with height which makes me very happy.

I don't care whether he would be tall enough to play basketball or whatever, I would just like for him to be normal/average. As it is, even if he were he would still get slack for being the shortest but eugenics isn't done in one generation.

Why does it matter, l'il dad? You're breathing proof that even little dudes can still get some beaver.

LOL nothing to do with getting beaver, my cousin (in grey) who is not much taller than me does even better with the ladies (the one in the pic is not as hot as his current gf). It's not really the height but it's all about the game. My main gripe is needing a foot stool every time I need to reach something. It just gets frustrating, plus a man of my impressive girth has problems finding clothes my size for my height. Don't want my kid having the same issues


Have the one on the left and the she-giant on the right bathed, perfumed and brought to my chambers.
 
2013-12-04 05:54:51 PM  
Guys who date women that are much shorter than them are weirdos.

Nothing I love more than doing it and staring at a pillow, while I receive passionate belly button kisses from my lady.
 
2013-12-04 08:16:10 PM  
Mrs. Grumbles is more than a foot shorter than I am. We honestly wish the difference was greater, because I like'em tiny* and she likes'em big.

*only applies to height. T&A, I like'em big, and Mrs. Grumbles doesn't looking like a 12 year old with DD cups.
 
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