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(Kinston Free Press)   North Carolina man selling copies of his colonoscopy on DVD to raise money for next colonoscopy   (kinston.com) divider line 53
    More: Silly, North Carolina, Drano  
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1439 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Dec 2013 at 9:54 AM (19 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-12-03 08:56:50 AM
The mise-en-scène was utter sh*t.
 
2013-12-03 09:59:33 AM
I found the director's interpretation puerile and jejunum, plus all the jump-cuts made me feel ileum.

/duodenum
 
2013-12-03 10:00:01 AM
Okay, who at Google is a Fark fan?  This ad happened to come up when I went to the comments page.

www.stkstudios.com
 
2013-12-03 10:02:34 AM
Yes, the prep for the procedure is the hardest part (unless you get bad news after the procedure's done).
 
2013-12-03 10:07:39 AM
Oh jeez...so I come back to the comment page after a few minutes and now the ad is on the top & side bar.   Actual screen shot, no Photoshop needed for this.

www.stkstudios.com
 
2013-12-03 10:11:02 AM
silly?  More like shiatty amirite?
 
2013-12-03 10:12:02 AM
That's what I call dedication to his film making.
 
2013-12-03 10:15:00 AM
Is there a poop trifecta in play?  Should I be searching for colo-rectal news to submit?
 
2013-12-03 10:15:21 AM
I had one a couple of years ago.  Prep wasn't great, but the procedure went ok and the rest of the day was quite nice.  I sat on the couch and watched Netfilx...although I didn't have the memory some people have, I was forbidden to use the internet or email. Many people experience a "short reset."  The doctor said had once had a patient order the same thing on line six times while in recovery after the procedure.
 
2013-12-03 10:18:17 AM
They call it a "colon o" scopy because it makes you :O
 
2013-12-03 10:28:55 AM
sooooo, it is the story of one mans ass and it's journey to locate a camera ?
 
2013-12-03 10:29:58 AM
Are there any DVD extras or Easter Eggs?
 
2013-12-03 10:32:17 AM
I'm convinced that Jon Dawson is submitting his article everyday to fark. Every time Kinston.com shows up it's bad satire.
 
2013-12-03 10:39:36 AM
The old video game was better ...


vgmdaily.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-12-03 10:41:44 AM
A real scene from the video ...


encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
 
2013-12-03 10:47:35 AM
You can bet that Bendover 2 won't be nearly as funny.
 
2013-12-03 10:49:30 AM
Mine was a piece a cake
Get a shot of 'You Don't Give A Shiat'
Lie on your side and watch it on TV
Kinda like the Pod Race where they're goin' thru the cave...
Only not quite as fast...
 
2013-12-03 10:53:31 AM
Colon:  What's my motivation?

Director:  AVOIDING DEATH!

Colon:  Whoa.  While I must confess that I'm weakened by two days of a liquid-only preparatory diet, I'll give it my all.  I'm warning you though while my performance may be understated it still may come across as a little corny.
 
2013-12-03 10:54:14 AM
This took A THREE-PAGE story to [un]cover?

/ Did not RTFA.
// Will not read past page 1 on a multi-page slideshow-of-death for a story that can be told in a 350-word abstract.
/// People who did read on: is there more to the story than the summary suggests?
 
2013-12-03 10:54:58 AM
Christ, what an asshole.
 
2013-12-03 10:59:55 AM
This DVD was not what I expected at all. There was a paucity of characters and plot. Resolution was poor and the scenery unchanging. It was like a video game without a goal or gold coins to collect along the way.

South Park did it much better. So did Futurama. I like Futurama best. I could use some of those worms. Anybody got $5.00 for a truck stop sandwich?

images.wikia.com
 
2013-12-03 11:00:19 AM
 
2013-12-03 11:05:42 AM

brantgoose: South Park did it much better. So did Futurama.


Even the Today show did it better.
 
2013-12-03 11:06:41 AM
The night before my colonoscopy, my dad sent this to me to "calm my nerves".
 
2013-12-03 11:07:30 AM

darth_badger: The old video game was better ...


[vgmdaily.files.wordpress.com image 300x412]


That was a great game.
 
2013-12-03 11:07:36 AM

scruffynerfherder: Are there any DVD extras or Easter Eggs?


The sequel filmed in April will.
 
2013-12-03 11:11:25 AM

brantgoose: <snip>

Anybody got $5.00 for a truck stop sandwich?


Not-so-CSB: I was the recipient of three days of horrific death-sickness from a gas-station sandwich. Egg salad, just like Fry's.

I bought it in Phoenix, Arizona. In the summertime. And drove to Flagstaff. In a truck with no AC. And only remembered the sandwich when I got home. And ate it.

I suppose the moral is this: if you ever hear yourself saying, "it's probably still okay," just throw it out, man.
 
2013-12-03 11:15:11 AM

bbcard1: I had one a couple of years ago.  Prep wasn't great, but the procedure went ok and the rest of the day was quite nice.  I sat on the couch and watched Netfilx...although I didn't have the memory some people have, I was forbidden to use the internet or email. Many people experience a "short reset."  The doctor said had once had a patient order the same thing on line six times while in recovery after the procedure.


That's because it's common in the USA to intentionally give an amnesic drug (Midazolam) so that you won't remember a thing about the procedure.  This is done to protect them, not you.   During the procedure you may very well have been experiencing the worst terror and pain of your life, but thanks to this drug you won't remember it (or sue the Dr, which is the primary goal).
 
2013-12-03 11:18:40 AM
Heck, I asked for a video ahead of time, and my GE said they never record it. I figured it was a liability thing, and that nobody would ever let a patient have a recording that could come back to bite them in court.

/prep wasn't nearly as bad as I'd been led to fear
//no memory of procedure itself
///no nausea or pain at all during recovery
////still not looking to take it up as a recreational activity
 
2013-12-03 11:20:18 AM

Sean M: bbcard1: I had one a couple of years ago.  Prep wasn't great, but the procedure went ok and the rest of the day was quite nice.  I sat on the couch and watched Netfilx...although I didn't have the memory some people have, I was forbidden to use the internet or email. Many people experience a "short reset."  The doctor said had once had a patient order the same thing on line six times while in recovery after the procedure.

That's because it's common in the USA to intentionally give an amnesic drug (Midazolam) so that you won't remember a thing about the procedure.  This is done to protect them, not you.   During the procedure you may very well have been experiencing the worst terror and pain of your life, but thanks to this drug you won't remember it (or sue the Dr, which is the primary goal).


That's one way to look at it. Another perspective is that they need you to be able to react to pain so they know if something is going wrong.

I get to have one every year or two (thanks Obama!) I had my last one just a couple of weeks ago. The prep isn't bad, honestly. I have a brief flash of memory of some serious pain but I have a stricture and my doc was trying to get through it to check out the other side. Better to have some pain (that you can barely remember) than for the doc to press on and accidentally rupture your bowel IMHO.

I was completely normal afterwards (at least I felt normal). I guess the drugs affect everyone a little differently.
 
2013-12-03 11:21:54 AM

Sean M: That's because it's common in the USA to intentionally give an amnesic drug (Midazolam) so that you won't remember a thing about the procedure.  This is done to protect them, not you.   During the procedure you may very well have been experiencing the worst terror and pain of your life, but thanks to this drug you won't remember it (or sue the Dr, which is the primary goal).


Oh, bullshiat. If you're experiencing terror and pain, the stress is going to knock your vitals for a loop, which is exactly the opposite of what any practitioner wants during a procedure. Sure, there are farkups sometimes, but in general, sedation means never having to say you're worried.
 
2013-12-03 11:31:55 AM

Sean M: bbcard1: I had one a couple of years ago.  Prep wasn't great, but the procedure went ok and the rest of the day was quite nice.  I sat on the couch and watched Netfilx...although I didn't have the memory some people have, I was forbidden to use the internet or email. Many people experience a "short reset."  The doctor said had once had a patient order the same thing on line six times while in recovery after the procedure.

That's because it's common in the USA to intentionally give an amnesic drug (Midazolam) so that you won't remember a thing about the procedure.  This is done to protect them, not you.   During the procedure you may very well have been experiencing the worst terror and pain of your life, but thanks to this drug you won't remember it (or sue the Dr, which is the primary goal).

Midazolam is also used for endoscopy procedural sedation and sedation in intensive care. The anterograde amnesia property of midazolam is useful for premedication before surgery to inhibit unpleasant memories


soooo basically its going to be bad but no worries, you wont remember it...
/no thanks, I'll keep my rear un-probed.
 
2013-12-03 11:38:47 AM
With helpful photo of what his butthole may look like?
 
2013-12-03 11:49:38 AM

Tight_as_an_Owl: With helpful photo of what his butthole may look like?


www.nndb.com
 
2013-12-03 11:49:59 AM
This is why they fly planes into buildings.
 
2013-12-03 11:51:36 AM
Protip:

If you are paying for your own colonoscopy, which is something like $3K or more in th US:

1) Fly to Costa Rica
2) Get a colonoscopy
3) Enjoy the beach for a week

It's cheaper than the US option.
 
2013-12-03 11:58:38 AM
SPOILER ALERT. Things come out well in the end.
 
2013-12-03 12:01:39 PM
Dave Barry had a better article:
http://www.miamiherald.com/2009/02/11/427603/
 
2013-12-03 12:03:52 PM
Stocking stuffer?

/I'll wait til it comes out on blu-ray
 
2013-12-03 12:18:16 PM
There's nothing but shiat on the TV tonight!
 
2013-12-03 12:20:05 PM
fc01.deviantart.net
 
2013-12-03 12:24:21 PM
I've been with the same woman since 1990 and have never done that in her presence out of respect

And of course we all know that ladies don't pass gas.  At least not real ladies.  They don't even have a desire to pass gas or vote.
 
2013-12-03 01:45:08 PM

offmymeds: SPOILER ALERT. Things come out well in the end.


Perfect, thanks!
 
2013-12-03 02:48:19 PM

jaytkay: Protip:If you are paying for your own colonoscopy, which is something like $3K or more in th US:
1) Fly to Costa Rica
2) Get a colonoscopy
3) Enjoy the beach for a week

It's cheaper than the US option.


Don't forget that they'll actually treat you with respect & dignity down there as well.
 
2013-12-03 02:48:25 PM

Ring of Fire: I'm convinced that Jon Dawson is submitting his article everyday to fark. Every time Kinston.com shows up it's bad satire.


I thought this was one of his better articles. He can be pretty funny, but churning out 2 pieces every week means he's going to have to mail it in from time to time. My favorite line:

About a minute later, the anesthetist unleashed the joy juice and I started to fade. The last terrifying thought I had before dozing off was that I never found that green army truck I loved so much as a kid.
 
2013-12-03 02:55:54 PM

Sean M: jaytkay: Protip:If you are paying for your own colonoscopy, which is something like $3K or more in th US:
1) Fly to Costa Rica
2) Get a colonoscopy
3) Enjoy the beach for a week

It's cheaper than the US option.

Don't forget that they'll actually treat you with respect & dignity down there as well.


Sean, you sound like you have some really horrible experiences. I've had no issues and odds are I've had more colonoscopies than you.

Personally I will take US medicine over Costa Rica most days of the week. If I had a number of rock solid recommendations from people I trust (i.e. not random people off the internet) then maybe, if I was strapped for cash. OTOH if I was strapped for cash I wouldn't be able to afford flight and hotel in Costa Rica in the first place.
 
2013-12-03 03:25:04 PM

Sean M: bbcard1: I had one a couple of years ago.  Prep wasn't great, but the procedure went ok and the rest of the day was quite nice.  I sat on the couch and watched Netfilx...although I didn't have the memory some people have, I was forbidden to use the internet or email. Many people experience a "short reset."  The doctor said had once had a patient order the same thing on line six times while in recovery after the procedure.

That's because it's common in the USA to intentionally give an amnesic drug (Midazolam) so that you won't remember a thing about the procedure.  This is done to protect them, not you.   During the procedure you may very well have been experiencing the worst terror and pain of your life, but thanks to this drug you won't remember it (or sue the Dr, which is the primary goal).


I doubt I was too worried about it...I work in advertising, so I am fairly used to the procedure.
 
2013-12-03 07:19:23 PM
I'd buy it. But only if Ripley is in there kickin' alien butt.
 
2013-12-03 07:55:56 PM
Thanks, Obamacare?
 
2013-12-03 08:05:34 PM

Jument: if I was strapped for cash. OTOH if I was strapped for cash I wouldn't be able to afford flight and hotel in Costa Rica in the first place.


I wasn't clear. The Costa Rican colonoscopy is cheaper INCLUDING the airfare and hotel.
 
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