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(TMZ)   David Beckham says at 16, he was hazed by teammates who forced him to masturbate to a picture of Welsh footballer Clayton Blackmore   (tmz.com) divider line 55
    More: Sad, David Beckham, Clayton Blackmore, youth system  
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1358 clicks; posted to Sports » on 29 Nov 2013 at 12:59 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



55 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-11-29 01:12:21 PM  
I doubt a bunch of guys could get me aroused to whack one out to another guy.
Thats just me though.
 
2013-11-29 01:16:53 PM  
That's a lot like me saying that at 16, I was hazed by being forced to have sex with Rebecca Romijn.
 
2013-11-29 01:19:37 PM  
Pics or it didn't happen.
 
2013-11-29 01:24:12 PM  
Is that what caused him to marry a moronic swizzle stick with poorly done porn tits?
 
2013-11-29 01:26:25 PM  

Why Would I Read the Article: That's a lot like me saying that at 16, I was hazed by being forced to have sex with Rebecca Romijn.


...Mom?
 
2013-11-29 01:26:30 PM  
Maybe he was able to do it by looking at his balls
 
2013-11-29 01:34:23 PM  
Warrior culture. You guys wouldn't understand.
 
2013-11-29 01:39:56 PM  
If it were a picture of Kevin Keegan, those players would have been tried at the Hauge.
 
2013-11-29 01:41:40 PM  
Let him who has not masturbated to Clayton Blackmore cast the first stone.

MFAWG: Warrior culture. You guys wouldn't understand.


You gotta do the full thing:

Football is the ultimate alpha male sport. It's for the toughest and strongest, both physically and mentally. These men live by a warrior's code, something you probably cannot begin to understand.
 
2013-11-29 01:42:44 PM  

Olympic Trolling Judge: Let him who has not masturbated to Clayton Blackmore cast the first stone.

MFAWG: Warrior culture. You guys wouldn't understand.

You gotta do the full thing:

Football is the ultimate alpha male sport. It's for the toughest and strongest, both physically and mentally. These men live by a warrior's code, something you probably cannot begin to understand.


That's the F Scott Fitzgerald version. I'm a Hemingway guy.
 
2013-11-29 01:43:19 PM  
Suuuuure they did.
 
2013-11-29 01:45:12 PM  
My old football coach used to tell stories of hazing (he played Canadian college football). It sounded horrible. One rookie contest was all of them had to strip naked, put a marshmallow in their butt and do a crab-walk around the a course in the locker room. If you dropped your marshmallow, you had to eat it. The loser of the race had to eat the rest of the marshmallows.
 
2013-11-29 01:47:08 PM  
he bend it like him!
 
2013-11-29 01:51:49 PM  
We get this crap but no daytime hockey thread?

Really?
 
2013-11-29 01:53:04 PM  

FORCING GUYS TO MASTURBATE TO OTHER GUYS.

WARRIORS CODE.

 
2013-11-29 01:57:30 PM  
When i went to college in the mid 90's the soccer team at school allegedly did this to incoming freshman, but instead of Blackmore they made the guys watch man on man porn and the women's team made the freshman watch girl on girl. The twist on this was that the freshman guy had to watch the guy on guy with the women's team. Our soccer team had English students on there which may explain it but still. WTF England
 
2013-11-29 02:06:52 PM  
Why are athletic traditions so homoerotic?
 
2013-11-29 02:26:29 PM  

Foxxinnia: Why are athletic traditions so homoerotic?


img.fark.net

I have to wonder-- where is the line where male athletic hazing crosses over from putting a player into a role deemed "beta" (basically homophobic and/or misogynistic shiat) into closeted wish-fulfilment?
 
2013-11-29 02:56:28 PM  

Transpogue: Foxxinnia: Why are athletic traditions so homoerotic?

[img.fark.net image 400x155]

I have to wonder-- where is the line where male athletic hazing crosses over from putting a player into a role deemed "beta" (basically homophobic and/or misogynistic shiat) into closeted wish-fulfilment?


I am not sure where the line is, I just happen to think that you have jumped over it firmly with Beckham's experience.
 
2013-11-29 02:58:16 PM  

Jim from Saint Paul: FORCING GUYS TO MASTURBATE TO OTHER GUYS.WARRIORS CODE.


It's the Spartan Way!
 
2013-11-29 03:03:44 PM  
I'll be in my bunk. Please post a similar story in six hours.
 
2013-11-29 03:09:38 PM  

Jim from Saint Paul: FORCING GUYS TO MASTURBATE TO OTHER GUYS.

                                                     WARRIORS CODE.

GAY

ftfy
 
2013-11-29 03:44:16 PM  

Huck And Molly Ziegler: I'll be in my bunk. Please post a similar story in six hours.


^this.
 
2013-11-29 04:10:22 PM  
www.flixist.com
 
2013-11-29 04:20:52 PM  
I've certainly had my ass kicked for standing up for myself under much less distasteful hazing rituals. I would definitely take the ass-whooping here as well and try and give as good as I got.
 
2013-11-29 04:33:52 PM  
Soccer in a nutshell
 
2013-11-29 04:56:54 PM  
What's up with white people always doing gay shiat when they get drunk?  The entire Jackass trilogy is based on it.
 
2013-11-29 05:00:32 PM  
Sounds pretty gay to me- I don't imagine David put up a lot of resistance.

On the other hand, naysayers be damned, Victoria and her bad fake tits and accent are stupid hot, so maybe it's like doing gay-for-pay to break into straight porn, except more worth it.
 
2013-11-29 05:06:20 PM  

Transpogue: Foxxinnia: Why are athletic traditions so homoerotic?

[img.fark.net image 400x155]

I have to wonder-- where is the line where male athletic hazing crosses over from putting a player into a role deemed "beta" (basically homophobic and/or misogynistic shiat) into closeted wish-fulfilment?


I think it's more along the lines of sexual humiliation in order to feel superior and/or make up for their own feelings of sexual inadequacy.  You have to have a real penis complex to be that obsessed with other mens genitalia.
 
2013-11-29 05:21:35 PM  

mikaloyd: Soccer in a nutshell


Damn straight. Real men watch Peyton Tebow and Lebron Griffin Incognito XLVIII stand around on the sidelines for three hours in between ad brea...  We'll be right back after this word from our sponsors.
 
2013-11-29 05:38:44 PM  
Sad tag? That's hilarious.
 
2013-11-29 05:41:49 PM  
I don't know who either of those people are.
 
2013-11-29 05:45:12 PM  

Foxxinnia: Why are athletic traditions so homoerotic?


It's almost as if large groups of physically fit men have a high percentage of... nevermind, what a crazy thought.
 
2013-11-29 06:22:07 PM  
and he probably popped out that wank in under three seconds.
 
2013-11-29 06:26:55 PM  
 
2013-11-29 06:43:59 PM  

MFAWG: Warrior culture. You guys wouldn't understand.


Warrior culture? David Beckham?
 
2013-11-29 06:49:37 PM  
'forced him' or 'caught him'?
 
2013-11-29 07:12:16 PM  

CommonName2: 'forced him' or 'caught him'?


I am going to take Caught for 500 alex
 
2013-11-29 07:26:47 PM  
As my wife says, Beckham is hot until he opens his mouth and that weedy voice creeps out.
 
2013-11-29 07:34:33 PM  
I'm calling bullshiat on this story in, soccer you can use your hands.
 
2013-11-29 07:47:12 PM  
Yeah..."forced".
 
2013-11-29 07:49:50 PM  
"Forced"
 
2013-11-29 08:57:29 PM  
When I was 16 I didn't need a reason to jerk off, I needed an opportunity.
 
2013-11-29 09:12:08 PM  
"Forced"
 
2013-11-29 10:04:16 PM  
And now he's banging Skeletor. Guy can't catch a break.
 
2013-11-29 10:17:27 PM  

LordZorch: Is that what caused him to marry a moronic swizzle stick with poorly done porn tits?

encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
She's not that bad. I sorta want.
 
2013-11-29 10:24:26 PM  

Olympic Trolling Judge: Let him who has not masturbated to Clayton Blackmore cast the first stone.

MFAWG: Warrior culture. You guys wouldn't understand.

You gotta do the full thing:

Football is the ultimate alpha male sport. It's for the toughest and strongest, both physically and mentally. These men live by a warrior's code, something you probably cannot begin to understand.


I agree, but these losers play soccer.
 
2013-11-30 12:07:44 AM  
this is one of those stories that really just have me going "how in the bloody hell did THAT come up in an interview?" i mean seriously, where the hell did that conversation derail to the point that becks is admitting that his former teammates had him rub one out over a popular player?  unless this is some convoluted-not-quite-going-anywhere version of him now being a popular player trying to be an open-minded celebrity and say it's okay for younger players to have him in their spankbank??
 
2013-11-30 01:12:39 AM  
I suppose that was good training to marry Posh Spice.
 
2013-11-30 03:34:37 AM  
Bend it like Beckham
 
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