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(Abc.net.au)   When will people learn that the only hit men found online are undercover police?   (abc.net.au) divider line 23
    More: Dumbass, undercover officers, Attwell, found guilty  
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1661 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Nov 2013 at 8:13 AM (19 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



23 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-11-29 08:17:39 AM
Hmm
I need someone dead. I know!!

Google: hitman, cheap, reliable. NOT a cop
 
2013-11-29 08:19:15 AM
Unless you're a Mafia Don or a Senator, you will NOT be able to have any access to a hit man. Period.

When will these trailer trash ever figure that out??
 
2013-11-29 08:25:07 AM
At the same time they'll figure out that the sexually precocious kids are also cops?
 
2013-11-29 08:30:19 AM

Resident Muslim: Hmm
I need someone dead. I know!!

Google: hitman, cheap, reliable. NOT a cop


that must be another case where you can only have 2 of the 3 criteria.  no one seems to choose 'not a cop' for some reason
 
2013-11-29 08:31:13 AM
He also said "there were about 40 blokes who'd like to get hold of" Ms Attwell.


i'd have to see some pictures first before i join the list
 
2013-11-29 08:40:12 AM
People who kill people for money are scary. If the hit man doesn't give you the willies, it's a cop.
 
2013-11-29 08:51:00 AM

Dead for Tax Reasons: Resident Muslim: Hmm
I need someone dead. I know!!

Google: hitman, cheap, reliable. NOT a cop

that must be another case where you can only have 2 of the 3 criteria.  no one seems to choose 'not a cop' for some reason


Nice.
I've previously used both the 2 out of 3 analogy (for other stuff) and I've also mentioned on Fark that if you are approaching a presumed hitman with an offer make it large enough so that even if he is an undercover cop he'll still take it.


/I don't think undercover cops are known for their morality, otherwise their cover would be blown over smaller things
 
2013-11-29 08:55:05 AM

Resident Muslim: Hmm
I need someone dead. I know!!

Google: hitman + cheap + reliable -cop


Let me fix your google-fu for you
 
2013-11-29 08:56:07 AM
Its not that hard to just kill them yourself.
 
2013-11-29 08:59:14 AM

Lost Thought 00: Its not that hard to just kill them yourself.


Coming from experience?
 
2013-11-29 09:04:38 AM

miscreant: Lost Thought 00: Its not that hard to just kill them yourself.

Coming from experience?


I'm just saying guns are cheap and plentiful, and there's a lot of empty space in the middle of the country
 
2013-11-29 09:21:58 AM

Lost Thought 00: miscreant: Lost Thought 00: Its not that hard to just kill them yourself.

Coming from experience?

I'm just saying guns are cheap and plentiful, and there's a lot of empty space in the middle of the country


The hard part is making it look like an accident.
 
2013-11-29 09:30:42 AM
reason.com
 
2013-11-29 10:20:14 AM

Muta: Lost Thought 00: miscreant: Lost Thought 00: Its not that hard to just kill them yourself.

Coming from experience?

I'm just saying guns are cheap and plentiful, and there's a lot of empty space in the middle of the country

The hard part is making it look like an accident.



Carbon Monoxide. Make it look like a faulty furnace.
 
2013-11-29 10:50:49 AM

TV's Vinnie: Unless you're a Mafia Don or a Senator, you will NOT be able to have any access to a hit man. Period.


There is a plot device, the professional independent hitman, that appears in a lot of fiction, as someone who can be hired to "solve your problems" if you know the right people to ask.

The existence of such people in the US is complete fiction. Family style organized crime may have dedicated enforcers who sometimes kill the Family's enemies but the victims are mostly other criminals and that practice has gone down a lot because of RICO.

Of course people can try to hire non professionals - someone they know, a guy from a biker bar, a meth-head - but there is rarely any reason for that type of hitman to have any loyalty and it is usually to their advantage to screw over the customer, and if they are too stupid not to they will likely be incompetent and/or caught and give up their customer to the police.

As for Senators or Governors being so powerful that they have hitmen on their staff and can cover up the hits, that is another fabrication of fiction and has no examples in the real world.
 
2013-11-29 11:12:14 AM

HairBolus: TV's Vinnie: Unless you're a Mafia Don or a Senator, you will NOT be able to have any access to a hit man. Period.

There is a plot device, the professional independent hitman, that appears in a lot of fiction, as someone who can be hired to "solve your problems" if you know the right people to ask.

The existence of such people in the US is complete fiction. Family style organized crime may have dedicated enforcers who sometimes kill the Family's enemies but the victims are mostly other criminals and that practice has gone down a lot because of RICO.

Of course people can try to hire non professionals - someone they know, a guy from a biker bar, a meth-head - but there is rarely any reason for that type of hitman to have any loyalty and it is usually to their advantage to screw over the customer, and if they are too stupid not to they will likely be incompetent and/or caught and give up their customer to the police.

As for Senators or Governors being so powerful that they have hitmen on their staff and can cover up the hits, that is another fabrication of fiction and has no examples in the real world.


Craig Spence would disagree with your last statement.
 
2013-11-29 11:12:49 AM
Last night on a different website I made a joke asking someone if they needed someone whacked for $40k.  Within 2 minutes I received a message from a throwaway account asking if that was a real offer.

"No.  No it is not."

Not sure if that was an idiot thinking they found a hitman to hire on reddit, or an idiot cop thinking he found a hitman to arrest on reddit.
 
2013-11-29 12:09:53 PM

abhorrent1: Resident Muslim: Hmm
I need someone dead. I know!!

Google: hitman + cheap + reliable -cop

Let me fix your google-fu for you


Thanks.


/wanted more people to get the joke.
 
2013-11-29 12:35:40 PM
www.blastr.com

That's why I only hire 12 year old girls off the internet to do my killing.
 
2013-11-29 01:07:03 PM

whither_apophis: HairBolus:
...
As for Senators or Governors being so powerful that they have hitmen on their staff and can cover up the hits, that is another fabrication of fiction and has no examples in the real world.

Craig Spence would disagree with your last statement.


What conspiracy theories are your sources for this?

The official report was that Spence was found dead, barricaded into a room at the Boston Ritz Carlton, dressed up as in his former glory. He was disgraced, down-and-out, and had stated that he would prefer quick death over dying from the AIDS he had.

Was there was a far-reaching conspiracy that may have reached from President GHWB, the KGB, CIA, Senatorial rent-boy customers all the way down to the Boston PD that killed him and made it look like a suicide? Enquiring minds want to know!
 
2013-11-29 10:25:41 PM
forgottenflix.com
Hot!
 
2013-11-29 10:52:00 PM
Just call AC/DC!
 
2013-11-29 11:49:22 PM

HairBolus: TV's Vinnie: Unless you're a Mafia Don or a Senator, you will NOT be able to have any access to a hit man. Period.

There is a plot device, the professional independent hitman, that appears in a lot of fiction, as someone who can be hired to "solve your problems" if you know the right people to ask.

The existence of such people in the US is complete fiction. Family style organized crime may have dedicated enforcers who sometimes kill the Family's enemies but the victims are mostly other criminals and that practice has gone down a lot because of RICO.

Of course people can try to hire non professionals - someone they know, a guy from a biker bar, a meth-head - but there is rarely any reason for that type of hitman to have any loyalty and it is usually to their advantage to screw over the customer, and if they are too stupid not to they will likely be incompetent and/or caught and give up their customer to the police.

As for Senators or Governors being so powerful that they have hitmen on their staff and can cover up the hits, that is another fabrication of fiction and has no examples in the real world.


Well, it's not a complete fiction.  It is, however, even more rare that the mythical human trafficking epidemic.

Murder is one of the harder crimes to get away with.  It tends to draw a lot of attention, and the cops usually take it seriously.  But it can be gotten away with, as the unsolved murder numbers certainly show.  And you're more likely to get away with it in some places, New Orleans would be a good place to be a hitman, San Diego wouldn't.

And most governors or senators wouldn't be able to hire a hitman, they're just simply too high profile to get away with it, and they know it.
 
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