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(Sydney Morning Herald)   The secret benefits of masturbation that no one talks about   (smh.com.au) divider line 153
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25766 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Nov 2013 at 8:55 PM (39 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



153 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-11-28 08:07:24 PM
They forgot it makes your forearms jacked, keeps your socks starched, and while your finger is in there you can feel if your prostate is swollen.
 
2013-11-28 08:09:11 PM
Keeps the kitten population down.
 
2013-11-28 08:20:21 PM
Someone is going to have to talk about it

/because I sure can't read about it anymore
 
2013-11-28 08:31:47 PM
People often masturbate into old age.

Whoa.  Look, I'm all for developing stamina, but seriously, orgasm once in a while.
 
2013-11-28 08:35:17 PM
Yes to #6. Easiest way to fall asleep after a tension-inducing day.
 
2013-11-28 08:37:19 PM

RodneyToady: People often masturbate into old age.

Whoa.  Look, I'm all for developing stamina, but seriously, orgasm once in a while.


Lulz.
 
2013-11-28 08:57:48 PM
As someone who just got done rubbing one out, I'm getting a kick out of these replies.

And I'm going to go take a nap now.
 
2013-11-28 08:58:27 PM
Jokes on you, everyone talks about it.
 
2013-11-28 08:58:35 PM
I'm preventing cancer? Giggity.
 
2013-11-28 08:59:14 PM
Also (as far as men are concerned) the risk of getting prostate cancer is lessened greatly if ya crank one out every once in a while.
 
2013-11-28 09:01:17 PM
I'm gonna freaking live forever!!!
 
2013-11-28 09:01:22 PM
Fap
 
2013-11-28 09:01:36 PM
"7. Improve the immune system and contribute to overall health."
No wonder I never get sick.
 
2013-11-28 09:01:58 PM
I can crush a coconut with my thumb and forefinger. Only with my shooting arm, though.
 
2013-11-28 09:02:02 PM
For sure, pretty much
All of the lonely
People do it.

Factually, it's been proven that
Anyone can see the
Possible benefits to it.

Finally, it's worth saying that
At some time it's the
Perfect alone-time activity.
 
2013-11-28 09:02:13 PM

Bareefer Obonghit: They forgot it makes your forearms jacked, keeps your socks starched, and while your finger is in there you can feel if your prostate is swollen.


That's so much bang for your buck
 
2013-11-28 09:03:04 PM
You don't have to talk to your junk after you are done?
 
2013-11-28 09:04:56 PM

Rwa2play: Also (as far as men are concerned) the risk of getting prostate cancer is lessened greatly if ya crank one out every once in a while.


I can tell you that is a myth, I got prostate cancer.
Well, maybe you are right, you did say 'once in a while', I can see my error now.
 
2013-11-28 09:05:02 PM
I can verify No. 10. When I suffer from leg cramps at night, I push one out and it puts me right to sleep.

/The more you know
/TMI?
 
2013-11-28 09:06:01 PM

dstanley: I'm preventing cancer? Giggity.


I proposed that Movermber stand for masurbating day, but noooo... We got mustaches and beards instead.  At least my idea would've prevented actual prostate cancer, instead ladies across the land get rug burn between their legs.
 
2013-11-28 09:06:26 PM

VivianVivisect: Jokes on you, everyone talks about it.


"Jesus Christ, man!, There's just some things you don't talk about in public!!"

i763.photobucket.com
 
2013-11-28 09:07:21 PM
That little figure stating 82% of women masturbate?

Just to clue everyone up to real life, EVERY woman masturbates.

I haven't met a single female who hasn't.

I just wanted to clear that up before we proceeded any further in this discussion.

Carry on.
 
2013-11-28 09:09:49 PM
Frequent masturbation helps in preventing the development of prostate cancer.


I'll never have to worry about prostate cancer
 
2013-11-28 09:10:02 PM
It can be done on the subway or bus!

/apparently
 
2013-11-28 09:10:09 PM
The girl in that stock photo probably had no idea she would end up in my spank bank...
 
2013-11-28 09:10:31 PM

mrlewish: I'm gonna freaking live forever!!!


Methuselah is my kid brother.
 
2013-11-28 09:11:13 PM

Badafuco: VivianVivisect: Jokes on you, everyone talks about it.

"Jesus Christ, man!, There's just some things you don't talk about in public!!"

[i763.photobucket.com image 850x478]


Okay what movie is this from because it seems to be a Fark favorite?
 
2013-11-28 09:12:11 PM
That little figure stating 82% of women masturbate?

Just to clue everyone up to real life, EVERY woman masturbates.

I haven't met a single female who hasn't.

I just wanted to clear that up before we proceeded any further in this discussion.

Carry on.


Two kinds of women...those who masturbate, and those who lie.
 
2013-11-28 09:13:00 PM
And it's a GREAT way to start a conversation...
 
2013-11-28 09:13:42 PM

Mole Man: Okay what movie is this from because it seems to be a Fark favorite?


Mallrats, one of Kevin Smith's efforts.
 
2013-11-28 09:14:37 PM

Mole Man: Badafuco: VivianVivisect: Jokes on you, everyone talks about it.

"Jesus Christ, man!, There's just some things you don't talk about in public!!"

[i763.photobucket.com image 850x478]

Okay what movie is this from because it seems to be a Fark favorite?


It's from the same cinematic classic that brought us "the stink finger."

/"It's a schooner!"
 
2013-11-28 09:14:56 PM
It's good for your prostate overall, not just cancer. It helps prevent enlarged prostates so you don't end up being one of those guys who has to get up 6 times a night to pee.
 
2013-11-28 09:15:22 PM

Transpogue: That little figure stating 82% of women masturbate?

Just to clue everyone up to real life, EVERY woman masturbates.

I haven't met a single female who hasn't.

I just wanted to clear that up before we proceeded any further in this discussion.

Carry on.


...Mom?
 
2013-11-28 09:15:28 PM
I'm fapping right now... wait for... AAAUNNNGHUUAANNNGGGHHHHHNNNNGG...
 
2013-11-28 09:15:30 PM
Are there additional benefits for talking about your masturbation?
 
2013-11-28 09:17:12 PM
It's also a fantastic way to meet people if done in public.
 
2013-11-28 09:18:03 PM
Does this mean I'm going to live to be 347 years old?
 
2013-11-28 09:18:21 PM
Live longer? When God said "Let there be light" -whoomph- that's me in the spotlight jacking to paintings scratched onto a cave wall.
 
2013-11-28 09:18:51 PM

Suckmaster Burstingfoam: It's also a fantastic way to meet people if done in public.


I once read somewhere, "masturbate in public and call it art."
 
2013-11-28 09:19:15 PM

docmattic: It's from the same cinematic classic that brought us "the stink finger."

/"It's a schooner!"


"Hahahaha you dumb bastard, it's not the stink finger, it's the stink palm"
 
2013-11-28 09:19:29 PM

RodneyToady: People often masturbate into old age.


Which is rather disquieting when done in inappropriate situations.

http://www.healthboards.com/boards/alzheimers-disease-dementia/31924 7- alzheimers-masturbation.html
"My father has Alz's and unfortunately is masturbating in public continually. What can be done to curb this behavior?"

I heard some guys that are proud that they masturbate 2 or more times a day. Guess how they will spend all of their time once their minds start to go.
 
2013-11-28 09:20:55 PM
Yeah, ok

as if anyone needs or gives a shiat about "added benefits" on top of giving yourself an orgasm.
 
2013-11-28 09:21:01 PM
Buffing the old pickle is a good way to turn off an unquiet mind and finally get some dam*ed sleep.
 
2013-11-28 09:22:14 PM

strife: Suckmaster Burstingfoam: It's also a fantastic way to meet people if done in public.

I once read somewhere, "masturbate in public and call it art."


Hey, that's great.

School children like art, don't they?
 
2013-11-28 09:22:56 PM

telejester: Two kinds of women people...those who masturbate, and those who lie.

 
2013-11-28 09:27:35 PM

Nowhereman: docmattic: It's from the same cinematic classic that brought us "the stink finger."

/"It's a schooner!"

"Hahahaha you dumb bastard, it's not the stink finger, it's the stink palm"


Dammitsomuch... that's what I get for relying on my failing memory instead of checking with IMDB.
 
2013-11-28 09:31:49 PM
It's also a nifty way to kill boredom!
 
2013-11-28 09:32:26 PM
i1048.photobucket.com
 
2013-11-28 09:34:41 PM

HairBolus: RodneyToady: People often masturbate into old age.

Which is rather disquieting when done in inappropriate situations.

http://www.healthboards.com/boards/alzheimers-disease-dementia/31924 7- alzheimers-masturbation.html
"My father has Alz's and unfortunately is masturbating in public continually. What can be done to curb this behavior?"

I heard some guys that are proud that they masturbate 2 or more times a day. Guess how they will spend all of their time once their minds start to go.


Apparently it's one of the lesser-known WTF moments while working a nursing home. It's not just Alzheimer's patients..
 
2013-11-28 09:35:42 PM

ReapTheChaos: It's good for your prostate overall, not just cancer. It helps prevent enlarged prostates so you don't end up being one of those guys who has to get up 6 times a night to pee.


i'm not sure about that. it might help some people but it doesn't help me. i still get up 6 times a night to pee. i don't think it if from the six spanks i have to do to go back to sleep.

also, is that girl in the pic sniffing her fingers after a session on the bean? she is so in my spank bank....

one more benefit of monkey spanking? sex with someone you love.
 
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