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(News One)   Will there be a fight at ToysRUs? Will BestBuy run out of $23 USB cables? What will the restroom line be like on Thanksgiving? What store do the hot chicks camp out at? Its the official Black Friday thread. Action kicks off at Walmart Thursday 6PM ET   (newsone.com) divider line 335
    More: Asinine, Toys R Us, temporary employees, Best Buy, USB  
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3592 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Nov 2013 at 6:00 PM (38 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-11-27 10:47:45 AM

smerfnablin: Oh! Honorable mention to the woman who pepper sprayed shoppers last year?

Let's see if she created a new tactic to clear crowds for this year


That's the great think about having a penis. Nothing clears a path like whipping out your junk and beating it like a redheaded stepchild.
 
2013-11-27 10:47:55 AM
This is what should be open on Thanksgiving: police, fire, rescue, and maybe gas stations.
 
2013-11-27 10:48:07 AM

Trainspotr: Saw a commercial yesterday for Big Lots, which will be open at 7am on Friday. Then I tried to think of something sadder than the kind of person who would go to Big Lots at 7am on the day after Thanksgiving.


Just thinking about a store like Big Lots makes me depressed.
 
2013-11-27 10:48:23 AM

danpanic77: [www.premier1supplies.com image 383x287]


Which reminds me, my friend from Scotland has a new girlfriend.
 
2013-11-27 10:49:04 AM

picturescrazy: This is what should be open on Thanksgiving: police, fire, rescue, and maybe gas stations.


LIQUOR STORES
 
2013-11-27 10:49:29 AM
The Black Friday threads should totally link to the Black Friday Death Count site. Best place to get updates, probably.

Whod'a thunk that Toys-R-Us is actually the site of more deaths than Wal-Mart?
 
2013-11-27 10:50:11 AM

James!: It's Wednesday.


So, you are already camped out for your place in line for a 70 inch big screen television that can double as a dining room table?
 
2013-11-27 10:50:19 AM

picturescrazy: This is what should be open on Thanksgiving: police, fire, rescue, and maybe gas stations.


I could make an argument for grocers too. Last-minute ingredient runs and all that.
 
2013-11-27 10:50:54 AM
Several years ago I used to do this. I'd go to Downtown Crossing in Boston- when Filene's was still there and every year they'd compete with the Macy's across the street for the best window designs.

There would be a tree lighting ceremony in the park, people would be happy, there were TONS of deals on stuff...

But for the past few years it's just been...awful. People AREN'T happy, they aren't enjoying themselves, it's a terrible consumer nightmare.
 
2013-11-27 10:51:08 AM
I think the people lined up outside Walmart should be treated like people lined up outside a movie theater. Drive by and yell spoilers at them. "YOUR KIDS ARE DOING DRUGS WHILE YOU WAIT IN LINE TO BUY CRAP TO TRY AND BUY THEIR LOVE!", or maybe "CHEAP GOODS WON'T MATTER WHEN YOU'RE DEAD!".
 
2013-11-27 10:51:32 AM

gilgigamesh: Yanks_RSJ: If you're planning on being at Wal-Mart at 6pm on Thanksgiving Day, just kill yourself.

Just imagine what a better world would result if we released mustard gas in front of every WalMart right then.


So we'd be stuck with a world full of people who think it's OK to use chemical weapons on people because we think they're dumb?  Tempting...tempting...
 
2013-11-27 10:52:16 AM
You know who is open all the time?  Amazon.
 
2013-11-27 10:52:24 AM

Mid_mo_mad_man: Isn't it early for a Black Friday thread?


Why, it's almost as if greening this early was some sort of commentary on the shopping madness itself.
 
2013-11-27 10:52:27 AM

Millennium: picturescrazy: This is what should be open on Thanksgiving: police, fire, rescue, and maybe gas stations.

I could make an argument for grocers too. Last-minute ingredient runs and all that.


No. Figure your shiat out the day before, or go without. It's not like you didn't know when the meal was going to be held.
 
2013-11-27 10:52:56 AM

Sin_City_Superhero: picturescrazy: This is what should be open on Thanksgiving: police, fire, rescue, and maybe gas stations.

LIQUOR STORES


Buy your liquor today, it's not that difficult.
 
2013-11-27 10:53:02 AM

Snarfangel: JerseyTim: A lot of people are up in arms about stores opening on Thanksgiving night and how it denies workers time with their families and how shoppers will prioritize bargain shopping over holiday goodness.

I say we should turn this into an opportunity. Stores like Wal Mart and Target should stay open all day on Thanksgiving, but they should serve delicious turkey meals for all their customers. Think about it. Instead of being holes up in our homes eating alone with our family, we can be out in Wal Mart, the center of our economic and social lives, enjoying a meal together as a community. It's what the Pilgrims would have wanted.

Walmart is supposedly serving hot food of some kind to employees who are working Thanksgiving, but "encouraging" employees to bring dishes to share with each other. Which (while admittedly a first-world problem) is very sad.


the store i work at is having the people at the store deli make chicken strips and other assorted hot case items. the people at the deli are thrilled by this. last time they actually went all out and hired a catering company lot of people got food poisoning .
 
2013-11-27 10:53:10 AM

tommyl66: I think the people lined up outside Walmart should be treated like people lined up outside a movie theater. Drive by and yell spoilers at them. "YOUR KIDS ARE DOING DRUGS WHILE YOU WAIT IN LINE TO BUY CRAP TO TRY AND BUY THEIR LOVE!", or maybe "CHEAP GOODS WON'T MATTER WHEN YOU'RE DEAD!".


If I were rich, I would hire people to hand out free birth control to everyone in line.

Probably at professional wrestling matches, too.
 
2013-11-27 10:53:19 AM

Millennium: The Black Friday threads should totally link to the Black Friday Death Count site. Best place to get updates, probably.

Whod'a thunk that Toys-R-Us is actually the site of more deaths than Wal-Mart?


To be fair, adults usually have to fall over and are able to at least fight a bit.

I can literally step on a standing kid without much issue.
 
2013-11-27 10:53:27 AM

tampaflacouple: The morons waiting to save $5 on an item got their asses soaked in a rain storm here in Florida this morning. Tonights low is supposed to be 38*

F*cking morons.....

38°?

They're all going to freeze to death!

/I wish it was going to be that warm here tomorrow.
//Not that it matters since I'll be inside all day, stuffed with food and alcohol.
 
2013-11-27 10:55:25 AM

what_now


Trainspotr: Saw a commercial yesterday for Big Lots, which will be open at 7am on Friday. Then I tried to think of something sadder than the kind of person who would go to Big Lots at 7am on the day after Thanksgiving.

The guy that has to leave his family's thanksgiving celebration to get to Big Lots by midnight to make sure it's stocked up for the people who will rush in at 7am.

That's sadder.


Counterpoint: that is unfortunate, but the guy stocking the shelves is at least serving a useful purpose. He has a job and is willing to do it, possibly because he might get fired if he didn't. His activity is much less optional than the activity of the shoppers (if that makes any sense).
 
2013-11-27 10:55:47 AM
Monday afternoon there were two people camping out in front of beast buy. On the news that evening those showed people camping out in front of bb with a flat screen tv hooked up to sat.
 
2013-11-27 10:58:21 AM

gilgigamesh: Yanks_RSJ: If you're planning on being at Wal-Mart at 6pm on Thanksgiving Day, just kill yourself.

Just imagine what a better world would result if we released mustard gas in front of every WalMart right then.


Pepper spray...mustard gas...spicy ketchup vapor...

Time to have an aerosolized barbecue.

/it's a condiment, basically.
 
2013-11-27 10:59:03 AM

tommyl66: Sin_City_Superhero: picturescrazy: This is what should be open on Thanksgiving: police, fire, rescue, and maybe gas stations.

LIQUOR STORES

Buy your liquor today, it's not that difficult.


Hogwash! Alcohol needs to be available on ALL holidays that involve hanging out with the family. Also holidays that involve fireworks, veterans, trees, diaper-clad baby archers, rabbits that lay eggs, and Kwanzaa.
 
2013-11-27 10:59:41 AM

Sin_City_Superhero: picturescrazy: This is what should be open on Thanksgiving: police, fire, rescue, and maybe gas stations.

LIQUOR STORES


Plumbers. I work at a plumbing shop and the guy who volunteers to work thanksgiving, Xmas and Super Bowl makes a killing.
 
2013-11-27 11:00:07 AM

what_now: The guy that has to leave his family's thanksgiving celebration to get to Big Lots by midnight to make sure it's stocked up for the people who will rush in at 7am.

That's sadder.


I haven't been able to have Thanksgiving with my sister in the past 6 years because of this crap.
 
2013-11-27 11:03:04 AM

I_C_Weener: James!: It's Wednesday.

So, you are already camped out for your place in line for a 70 inch big screen television that can double as a dining room table?


I'm actually 4 champagnes into my work day.  Museum work is the best.
 
2013-11-27 11:03:28 AM

smerfnablin: Oh! Honorable mention to the woman who pepper sprayed shoppers last year?

Let's see if she created a new tactic to clear crowds for this year


I'm going all-in on a guy bringing a spiked-ball-and-chain flail and swinging it around. Bonus points if he buries the ball in the front door tempered glass.

And then like, eight guys come running behind him carrying a giant door ram, and they just obliterate the front doors of the Wal-Mart, and then the roaring hordes charge in behind them. That's what Black Friday could really use.
 
2013-11-27 11:10:04 AM
I wonder how many of the people camping out can do so because they're on welfare.  I bet it's 90+% of them.
 
2013-11-27 11:10:48 AM

James!: It's Wednesday.


You know what would be really crazy? If all those stores opened today.
 
2013-11-27 11:10:54 AM
I think that when we finally get the recipe for Soylent Green just right that it passes taste tests we could use store front sales such as this for collection sites
 
2013-11-27 11:11:01 AM
The only way I'll see Black Friday is if someone takes me out of the house at gunpoint to go shopping.  And even then I'd have to think it over.
 
2013-11-27 11:11:40 AM

Smeggy Smurf: I wonder how many of the people camping out can do so because they're on welfare. I bet it's 90+% of them.


And that's the same thing as it being true.
 
2013-11-27 11:14:18 AM

Sin_City_Superhero: tommyl66: Sin_City_Superhero: picturescrazy: This is what should be open on Thanksgiving: police, fire, rescue, and maybe gas stations.

LIQUOR STORES

Buy your liquor today, it's not that difficult.

Hogwash! Alcohol needs to be available on ALL holidays that involve hanging out with the family. Also holidays that involve fireworks, veterans, trees, diaper-clad baby archers, rabbits that lay eggs, and Kwanzaa.


If you don't have enough alcohol in your house to dull the pain of family, you're doing it wrong.
 
2013-11-27 11:14:58 AM

Millennium: The Black Friday threads should totally link to the Black Friday Death Count site. Best place to get updates, probably.

Whod'a thunk that Toys-R-Us is actually the site of more deaths than Wal-Mart?


Toys R Us is the Chuck E Cheese of toy stores.
 
2013-11-27 11:15:40 AM
wait, if Hanukkah starts on Friday, can't we somehow argue that this year if you shop on Friday, you're anti-Semitic?
 
2013-11-27 11:16:23 AM
I'll be at Walmart at 6pm tomorrow. I'll buy a single Fram PH3387 oil filter and stand in line for an hour with it clutched tightly to my chest. If anyone asks me I'll scream at them to keep their distance. But most people will leave me alone since I'll be wearing my Class A jacket with all my ribbons, biker shorts, and pink Crocs.
 
2013-11-27 11:16:46 AM
I always work on holidays because people are so grateful that I'm around to help them (medical). And my family picks a non-Thursday to all get together and have a big meal and visit. Things are also a little cheaper, a little quieter that way.
 
2013-11-27 11:17:05 AM

Smeggy Smurf: I wonder how many of the people camping out can do so because they're on welfare.  I bet it's 90+% of them.


Damn welfare queens with their tents and lawn chairs and sleeping bags. I heard from a reliable source that immigrants are having anchor babies in Black Friday lines so they can get secret special discounts for new mothers that Obama signed as an executive order without Congresses approval!
 
2013-11-27 11:17:19 AM
My wife is gonna hang around pet smart so she can get the awesome dog food deals that are half off
 
2013-11-27 11:18:00 AM

ZeroPly: I'll be at Walmart at 6pm tomorrow. I'll buy a single Fram PH3387 oil filter and stand in line for an hour with it clutched tightly to my chest. If anyone asks me I'll scream at them to keep their distance. But most people will leave me alone since I'll be wearing my Class A jacket with all my ribbons, biker shorts, and pink Crocs.


have you SEEN People of walmart.com?

That outfit won't even phase them.
 
2013-11-27 11:18:40 AM

tommyl66: Smeggy Smurf: I wonder how many of the people camping out can do so because they're on welfare.  I bet it's 90+% of them.

Damn welfare queens with their tents and lawn chairs and sleeping bags. I heard from a reliable source that immigrants are having anchor babies in Black Friday lines so they can get secret special discounts for new mothers that Obama signed as an executive order without Congresses approval!


That just confirms my suspicions.
 
2013-11-27 11:20:35 AM
My favorite retail job was Babie's 'R Us. One of the few retail stores that escapes the holiday rush since business is pretty much steady year round for obvious reasons. My boss loved how there was no stress about extra hours there during the holidays.
 
2013-11-27 11:20:42 AM

tommyl66: Smeggy Smurf: I wonder how many of the people camping out can do so because they're on welfare.  I bet it's 90+% of them.

Damn welfare queens with their tents and lawn chairs and sleeping bags. I heard from a reliable source that immigrants are having anchor babies in Black Friday lines so they can get secret special discounts for new mothers that Obama signed as an executive order without Congresses approval!


Don't forget that allows them to pick up another TV at 80% off because technically it's just one-per-person, but they didn't count on another person coming out of one!
 
2013-11-27 11:23:15 AM
I get a day off and I'm going to get up early to go shopping?  FARK THAT!  I'll be wearing out the couch either reading or watching football since I already had the car worked on this week.
 
2013-11-27 11:24:32 AM
static.guim.co.uk

"Muuuuuuuust have braaaaaai..... ummmmmm I mean useless bullsh*t! Baaaaaaaaaargains....."
 
2013-11-27 11:25:53 AM
economy.ocregister.com
 
2013-11-27 11:26:32 AM

NeverDrunk23: How many people will be trampled to death by assholes trying to save five dollars off some plastic piece of shiat toy their kids will tire of 10 minutes later?


The same day/day after giving thanks for what they already have.
 
2013-11-27 11:30:54 AM

Sin_City_Superhero: tommyl66: Sin_City_Superhero: picturescrazy: This is what should be open on Thanksgiving: police, fire, rescue, and maybe gas stations.

LIQUOR STORES

Buy your liquor today, it's not that difficult.

Hogwash! Alcohol needs to be available on ALL holidays that involve hanging out with the family. Also holidays that involve fireworks, veterans, trees, diaper-clad baby archers, rabbits that lay eggs, and Kwanzaa.


See that's why you're a superhero. What's your superpower? Finding booze?
 
2013-11-27 11:31:55 AM

James!: It's Wednesday.

 
2013-11-27 11:31:58 AM

Smeggy Smurf: I wonder how many of the people camping out can do so because they're on welfare.  I bet it's 90+% of them.


I would definitely take you up on that bet. 90% of them are either retired, or self-employed, or take vacation days. 99% of them are nutjobs.
 
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