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(Daily Mail)   Parkour, the French martial art of running away, leaves 15-year-old Californian boy in coma   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 78
    More: Sad, Californians, deathbed conversion, corporal punishments, The Press Democrat, improvised firearm, Nigella Lawson, Sandy Hook  
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8507 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Nov 2013 at 5:26 PM (42 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



78 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-11-26 04:16:28 PM
I would've gone with "Parkour ineffective against Darwin," but OK.
 
2013-11-26 04:22:06 PM
martial art?!
 
2013-11-26 04:23:11 PM
That's the HS my wife graduated from...

...in 1974. But still...
 
2013-11-26 04:33:59 PM
Parkouma?
 
2013-11-26 05:03:09 PM
i49.tinypic.com
 
2013-11-26 05:21:03 PM

akamai.paramountcomedy.com

PARKOUR!

 
2013-11-26 05:28:28 PM
Did he slip on a flat food featuring cheese and tomato sauce?
slice.seriouseats.com
 
2013-11-26 05:28:37 PM

Pocket Ninja: I would've gone with "Parkour ineffective against Darwin," but OK.


And we're done here. Sad tag? Really???
 
2013-11-26 05:31:09 PM

special20: Did he slip on a flat food featuring cheese and tomato sauce?
[slice.seriouseats.com image 500x272]


images3.wikia.nocookie.net

Ezio accapets your rooftop pizza being in the wrong thread.
 
2013-11-26 05:31:27 PM
That headline made me laugh, subby. Props for "French martial art of running away"
 
2013-11-26 05:31:55 PM
Damnit! Fark really needs an edit button.
 
2013-11-26 05:32:06 PM
Parkour is a physical discipline rooted in military obstacle course training involving vaults, jumps and other kinds of acrobatics, which originated in France and recently has become popular waned in popularity around the globe.
 
2013-11-26 05:32:15 PM
I though the parkour fad had died out
 
2013-11-26 05:33:21 PM

ongbok: I though the parkour fad had died out


One by one, it is.
 
2013-11-26 05:34:44 PM
I need more information before concluding my feelings about this.

Normally, I'd feel bad for the kid and his family.  However, if the kid invoked YOLO, then fark him and I hope he dies.
 
2013-11-26 05:35:20 PM
Footage of the incident.
 
2013-11-26 05:35:25 PM
i.usatoday.net

/ sees what u did there
 
2013-11-26 05:35:52 PM
 
2013-11-26 05:36:52 PM

Cup Check: Pocket Ninja: I would've gone with "Parkour ineffective against Darwin," but OK.

And we're done here. Sad tag? Really???


Yeah fark him.
 
2013-11-26 05:37:03 PM
french for bustin' yo ass
 
2013-11-26 05:37:25 PM
Bravo subby!


gifsforum.com
 
2013-11-26 05:37:30 PM
FTA "medically induced come for the next three to five days."

Did they page Dr. Sting to the ER?
 
2013-11-26 05:38:27 PM
Parkour is fun to watch when it goes right, and even more fun to watch when it goes wrong.
 
2013-11-26 05:40:10 PM
sad for the kid and his parents.


YOLO inevitablygives way to YODO
 
2013-11-26 05:40:42 PM
Still responsible for the awesomest Bond movie chase EVAR!
 
2013-11-26 05:41:27 PM
I play disc golf with a young guy that tries this stuff. He climbed 20 feet up into an oak tree and back flipped off of a main branch. I was gonna film it, but I figured if I had a camera running, he'd miss and break his frikkin' neck.
He nailed the landing.
 
2013-11-26 05:42:52 PM

FuzedBox: Damnit! Fark really needs an edit button.


There is one, but it's in real life - like way before you ever picked up the bong.
 
2013-11-26 05:43:39 PM

SmackLT: That headline made me laugh, subby. Props for "French martial art of running away"


second


lamric: Bravo subby!


ditto
 
2013-11-26 05:43:47 PM
Survival of the fittest is not limited to physical attributes. Mental challenges often present obstacles that filter out the incapable as well. This person decided to take on both sides of the theory with predictable results.

While his success would have at best earned a moderate applause, he failed to realize that the consequences of failing severely outweighed any benefits, and we should agree that while tragic, it is a necessary step in evolution for stupidity to fail in order for intelligence to prevail.
 
2013-11-26 05:44:36 PM

FuzedBox: Ezio accapets your rooftop pizza being in the wrong thread.


I'm not sure how your autocorrect got that word from "accepts" or what it even means.
 
2013-11-26 05:46:09 PM
Parkour is the backbone of the Internet's fail videos
 
2013-11-26 05:46:19 PM
www.gifcrap.com
 
2013-11-26 05:49:36 PM

The Stealth Hippopotamus: martial art?!


It's the "Knockout Game" with buildings. You sneak up on the buildings, beat them up, and run away.
 
2013-11-26 05:49:42 PM

mark12A: Still responsible for the awesomest Bond movie chase EVAR!


If you mean non-car movie chase scene in a bond movie;

^^^^^^^^^THIS^^^^^^^^^
 
2013-11-26 05:52:27 PM
celebpictu.com
approves
 
2013-11-26 05:53:55 PM

WelldeadLink: The Stealth Hippopotamus: martial art?!

It's the "Knockout Game" with buildings. You sneak up on the buildings, beat them up, and run away.


Only white buildings, right?
 
2013-11-26 05:56:52 PM
At what age does "sad" become "dumbass"?
 
2013-11-26 06:03:36 PM
Years ago in Belgium, I did a commercial for a Dutch cellphone company that involved lots and lots of wooden blocks tumbling through a building and had a giant anthropomorphic thumb at the end promising "Dree Hundret Minuties" in Flemish and the next day there was a parkour dude making another commercial for the company that had a strong aversion to purple dominoes because purple was the color of a competing cellphone company and lately I had a gig in Chi-Town with another Dutch company which involved thousands of screaming brats and now I'm blowing off steam, intermittently watching a crummy Clark and McCullough comedy from RKO made in 1935, and...well, it's too bad this kid's in a coma, but parkour really is cool, a lot better than some football 'tight end' with awesome hang time throwing a stupid pointed ball and getting a five-yard sac penalty something or other...and as Salvador Dali said, "I am the drug" and there is such a thing as being so damned rational that I've gone full-circle to the other end and at least I'm not as silly as you are for reading this rambling monologue.  So there!
 
2013-11-26 06:09:22 PM
This free runner was just at

*sunglasses*

upload.wikimedia.org

The Mirror's Edge.
 
2013-11-26 06:14:37 PM
The g*damned Batman he is not.

Nice try though. Might want to wear some hockey pads next time.
 
2013-11-26 06:14:56 PM

Psycat: Years ago in Belgium, I did a commercial for a Dutch cellphone company that involved lots and lots of wooden blocks tumbling through a building and had a giant anthropomorphic thumb at the end promising "Dree Hundret Minuties" in Flemish and the next day there was a parkour dude making another commercial for the company that had a strong aversion to purple dominoes because purple was the color of a competing cellphone company and lately I had a gig in Chi-Town with another Dutch company which involved thousands of screaming brats and now I'm blowing off steam, intermittently watching a crummy Clark and McCullough comedy from RKO made in 1935, and...well, it's too bad this kid's in a coma, but parkour really is cool, a lot better than some football 'tight end' with awesome hang time throwing a stupid pointed ball and getting a five-yard sac penalty something or other...and as Salvador Dali said, "I am the drug" and there is such a thing as being so damned rational that I've gone full-circle to the other end and at least I'm not as silly as you are for reading this rambling monologue.  So there!


ow, my brain!
 
2013-11-26 06:19:08 PM

Dragonflew: At what age does "sad" become "dumbass"?


There is no age limit on just being too farkin stupid to live.
 
2013-11-26 06:32:01 PM

danno_to_infinity: ow, my brain!


And the farking scary thing is that I appear perfectly normal, well kinda nerdy, in public.  That nebbish-looking guy with the thick plastic-framed glasses and golly-gee Wally Cleaver look is actually a raving nut-case and autocratic kook who makes money blowing things up and knocking things over, gets turned on by women in scuba gear, makes brilliant linear mazes, won $4,000 designing a Roller Coaster Tycoon coaster (tsb), watches slapstick comedies by forgotten comedians like Al St. John and Madsen & Schenstrom, appeared on a Russian network television game show recently and shook hands with a cosmonaut, can whistle Thelonius Monk tunes, whacks off about 3 times a day when I'm between women, can go mano-a-mano with C.S. Lewis on theology, and makes a wicked 15-bean soup.

/well, actually, I live in the crawl space under my momma's single-wide and I still haven't found the shortcut to Negative World on Super Mario Brothers
//praise 'Bob'
 
2013-11-26 06:39:35 PM
Did his shoes come off?
 
2013-11-26 06:41:19 PM

Psycat: Years ago in Belgium, I did a commercial for a Dutch cellphone company that involved lots and lots of wooden blocks tumbling through a building and had a giant anthropomorphic thumb at the end promising "Dree Hundret Minuties" in Flemish and the next day there was a parkour dude making another commercial for the company that had a strong aversion to purple dominoes because purple was the color of a competing cellphone company and lately I had a gig in Chi-Town with another Dutch company which involved thousands of screaming brats and now I'm blowing off steam, intermittently watching a crummy Clark and McCullough comedy from RKO made in 1935, and...well, it's too bad this kid's in a coma, but parkour really is cool, a lot better than some football 'tight end' with awesome hang time throwing a stupid pointed ball and getting a five-yard sac penalty something or other...and as Salvador Dali said, "I am the drug" and there is such a thing as being so damned rational that I've gone full-circle to the other end and at least I'm not as silly as you are for reading this rambling monologue.  So there!


3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-11-26 06:41:27 PM
The odd thing is parkour was not about flashiness or stunts as concieved. If was about free flowing movement along natural lines. The founder ran in the woods.

I blame modern parkour on the russian version of redneck stunt videos. "Da, comrade. Hold my vodka. I want to try something."
 
2013-11-26 06:48:25 PM
Subby is a genius.  I'm stealing that line.

"The French martial art of running away."
 
2013-11-26 06:52:30 PM

fusillade762: Psycat: Years ago in Belgium, I did a commercial for a Dutch cellphone company that involved lots and lots of wooden blocks tumbling through a building and had a giant anthropomorphic thumb at the end promising "Dree Hundret Minuties" in Flemish and the next day there was a parkour dude making another commercial for the company that had a strong aversion to purple dominoes because purple was the color of a competing cellphone company and lately I had a gig in Chi-Town with another Dutch company which involved thousands of screaming brats and now I'm blowing off steam, intermittently watching a crummy Clark and McCullough comedy from RKO made in 1935, and...well, it's too bad this kid's in a coma, but parkour really is cool, a lot better than some football 'tight end' with awesome hang time throwing a stupid pointed ball and getting a five-yard sac penalty something or other...and as Salvador Dali said, "I am the drug" and there is such a thing as being so damned rational that I've gone full-circle to the other end and at least I'm not as silly as you are for reading this rambling monologue.  So there!

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 400x348]


Whoa, was that a "Great Gatsby" * reference?

*Hint:  A Tallulah Bankhead reference is even snarkier by 3.5 Parkers**

**Parker:  Unit of snarkiness named after Dorothy Parker, boozehound and all-around snarky babe.
 
2013-11-26 06:56:47 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-11-26 07:01:33 PM

BafflerMeal: The odd thing is parkour was not about flashiness or stunts as concieved. If was about free flowing movement along natural lines. The founder ran in the woods.

I blame modern parkour on the russian version of redneck stunt videos. "Da, comrade. Hold my vodka. I want to try something."


FLIPS ARE NOT PARKOUR!

Sorry...had to get that out of the way. Parkour was influenced by the naturalistic way that African bushmen moved within their environment in a fluid and efficient manner. It was then combined with an aesthetic of strength and fitness for practical purposes, such as a firefighter or emergency responder.

Flips and flashy moves are freerunning, or tricking.
 
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