If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Failure Magazine)   It's the 30th anniversary of 'A Christmas Story'. Green light this link? I double-dog dare you. No, I triple-dog dare ya   (failuremag.com) divider line 112
    More: Sappy, A Christmas Story, Christmas Day, teen movies, It's a Wonderful Life, Siskel, sex comedy, Porky, flight schools  
•       •       •

1341 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 24 Nov 2013 at 11:16 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



112 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-11-24 05:19:32 AM  
I think you may have breached protocol there, Subby.
 
2013-11-24 08:59:08 AM  
You can't have a green light.

You
'll shoot your eye outkid.
 
2013-11-24 09:02:33 AM  
BOOM!!
 
2013-11-24 09:20:38 AM  

corq: You'll shoot your eye out,  kid.


Oh, I know this answer:  What is...
"What my wife said to as I saw the Official  Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle display at Walmart."

/but now it's 600 shot!
 
2013-11-24 09:23:47 AM  
"From the creators of Porky's!"
 
2013-11-24 09:49:49 AM  
That makes Ralphie...forty-two!

i218.photobucket.com

/You'll throw your back out, kid!
 
2013-11-24 09:56:17 AM  
SONSOFBIATCHESBUMPESSES !11!!
 
2013-11-24 10:18:10 AM  
Naddafinga!
 
2013-11-24 10:21:01 AM  

corq: You can't have a green light.


Yeah, I'm afraid you're wrong there
 
2013-11-24 10:29:10 AM  
"well it's a blue ball! it's a bowling ball!"

love that line.
 
2013-11-24 10:51:38 AM  
I really hate this movie.
 
2013-11-24 10:58:24 AM  

SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.


That just goes to show you are a bad person!

I mean I HATE Christmas, even I like this movie.
 
2013-11-24 11:06:06 AM  
Best Christmas movie ever. Between now and New Year's I'll have it on at least 10 times, and I'll watch it at least twice during the 24 hour marathon.
 
2013-11-24 11:06:13 AM  
and it's playing at NYC's Empire 25 at 2 pm today.
Getting my ticket now
 
2013-11-24 11:28:03 AM  
Nadafinga!
 
2013-11-24 11:28:04 AM  

Adolf Oliver Nipples: Best Christmas movie ever. Between now and New Year's I'll have it on at least 10 times, and I'll watch it at least twice during the 24 hour marathon.


It's replaced the Yule log as Christmas Morning viewing.
 
2013-11-24 11:32:38 AM  
My favorite line:

"Daddy's gonna kill Ralphie"

I don't know why but I love that line/scene and then when Ralphie realizes that his mom is going to cover for him.
 
2013-11-24 11:33:24 AM  

SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.


Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.
 
2013-11-24 11:33:36 AM  
Only if you drink this 30 year old ovaltine  subby.
 
2013-11-24 11:41:28 AM  
thilllogistics.com
A crummy commercial? Son-of-a-biatch
 
2013-11-24 11:42:37 AM  

SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.


you're not the only one.  it's an awful movie filled with awful characters, and i'll never understand why anyone likes it.  i mean, i hate adam sandler movies too, but at least i understand why other people like them.  but a christmas story?  i just can't see why anyone would enjoy such a bitter, humorless, painful film.
 
2013-11-24 11:47:21 AM  

PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.


And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.
 
2013-11-24 11:47:38 AM  

SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.


So do I. My wife loves it for some reason.

enderthexenocide: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

you're not the only one.  it's an awful movie filled with awful characters, and i'll never understand why anyone likes it.  i mean, i hate adam sandler movies too, but at least i understand why other people like them.  but a christmas story?  i just can't see why anyone would enjoy such a bitter, humorless, painful film.


My wife thinks I am just being a contrarian, but I didn't like one minute of that movie. Just, ugh.
 
2013-11-24 11:47:58 AM  

enderthexenocide: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

you're not the only one.  it's an awful movie filled with awful characters, and i'll never understand why anyone likes it.  i mean, i hate adam sandler movies too, but at least i understand why other people like them.  but a christmas story?  i just can't see why anyone would enjoy such a bitter, humorless, painful film.


3.bp.blogspot.com

/hot like that overloaded wall socket
 
2013-11-24 11:48:38 AM  

3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.


In God I trust, all others pay cash.
 
2013-11-24 11:53:14 AM  
Do you people just wake up in the morning and say to yourselves "Hey, I'm gonna spend my day on the computer finding threads about things I don't like, and make sure to comment on them to make sure everyone knows how much I dislike what they like?".
 
2013-11-24 11:56:40 AM  

3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.


Gosh, I can only recall being forced to watch that horrible piece of crap 2 or three times a year for 15 years. My ability to ignore things I was forced to memorize isn't as great as  would hope. The jokes aren't funny, the story is stupid, the characters all deserve to be punched in the junk, and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.
 
2013-11-24 11:56:47 AM  
Wow, feeling old.
 
2013-11-24 12:02:38 PM  

BunkyBrewman: "What my wife said to as I saw the Official  Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle display at Walmart."


My wife gave me one for Christmas a few years back. I have it in my office, and it's one of the first things a lot of people comment on when they visit for the first time. Well, that and "You sure have a lot of books, have you read them ALL?"

/ I wish I was kidding about the last part

img.fark.net
 
2013-11-24 12:03:51 PM  
Fra-geel-eh! It must be Italian!
 
2013-11-24 12:06:09 PM  
One comment for every year since the movie came out, and not one fah rah rah?  For shame, Fark.
 
2013-11-24 12:09:25 PM  

Neeek: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

Gosh, I can only recall being forced to watch that horrible piece of crap 2 or three times a year for 15 years. My ability to ignore things I was forced to memorize isn't as great as  would hope. The jokes aren't funny, the story is stupid, the characters all deserve to be punched in the junk, and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.


Forced? Really? That speaks volumes about you.
 
2013-11-24 12:09:27 PM  

3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.


......

/did I just read that?
 
2013-11-24 12:10:00 PM  
I've never got more than 20 minutes into this thing and I'm in the right age demographic, I would assume.

My Christmas movie list begins and ends with this guy:

www.cedmagic.com

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.
 
2013-11-24 12:11:32 PM  

Winterlight: "You sure have a lot of books, have you read them ALL?"

/ I wish I was kidding


It's a fair question. My father has ADD and probably hasn't read a single book cover to cover in his entire life, but has 4 bookshelves full of books.
 
2013-11-24 12:12:54 PM  
"It's SMILING at us"...
www.redstaplerchronicles.com
Deck the horrs with bawrs of horry, fa ra ra ra ra, ra ra ra ra!
 
2013-11-24 12:13:44 PM  

3StratMan: Neeek: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

Gosh, I can only recall being forced to watch that horrible piece of crap 2 or three times a year for 15 years. My ability to ignore things I was forced to memorize isn't as great as  would hope. The jokes aren't funny, the story is stupid, the characters all deserve to be punched in the junk, and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.

Forced? Really? That speaks volumes about you.


You spend a lot of time in school in the 80s and 90s? I don't recall having a choice about being in class.
 
2013-11-24 12:14:42 PM  

Valiente: I've never got more than 20 minutes into this thing and I'm in the right age demographic, I would assume.

My Christmas movie list begins and ends with this guy:

[www.cedmagic.com image 400x300]

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.


Without question my favorite Christmas movie ever

/I won't watch any other version
 
2013-11-24 12:15:24 PM  

3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.


I come here to talk about my opinions on things. I did not insult anyone personally, you are allowed to feel however you feel and post whatever you like. However, I don't understand your apparent anger over the topic. What did I say that was so upsetting to you?
 
2013-11-24 12:16:05 PM  
Subby uses all the glue ON PURPOSE!!!
 
2013-11-24 12:18:35 PM  

Neeek: ...and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.


Wait, what? Jean Shepherd (the movie is semi-autobiograpical) is a legendary storyteller. It's too bad he's dead, he could read the phone book and make it entertaining.
 
2013-11-24 12:19:00 PM  

Valiente: I've never got more than 20 minutes into this thing and I'm in the right age demographic, I would assume.

My Christmas movie list begins and ends with this guy:

[www.cedmagic.com image 400x300]

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.


Begs to differ...
www.cedmagic.com
 
2013-11-24 12:19:27 PM  
You used up all the glue... ON PURPOSE!

/McGavin's delivery of this line was priceless.
 
2013-11-24 12:20:00 PM  
Jebus. Can we get a little icon displayed next to the Fark threads that have devolved into pissy group therapy? I truly hope you folks are this passionate in all areas of your lives.

/came for fa-ra-ra-ra-ra jokes
//leaving yellow-eyed
 
2013-11-24 12:24:59 PM  
"and another time we had an entire busload of people dressed in pink bunny suits."

Yikes! I'll think of that next Tour-Bus season.
 
2013-11-24 12:26:55 PM  

Valiente


It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.


Not bad, but Albert Finney Scrooge is best Scrooge.
 
2013-11-24 12:33:41 PM  

Bondith: One comment for every year since the movie came out, and not one fah rah rah?  For shame, Fark.


My favorite scene in the movie....
 
2013-11-24 12:35:46 PM  

PanicMan: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

I come here to talk about my opinions on things. I did not insult anyone personally, you are allowed to feel however you feel and post whatever you like. However, I don't understand your apparent anger over the topic. What did I say that was so upsetting to you?


No anger. Not upset. Just find it strange that people like you have to make it a point to tell everyone online your dislike about the things that they like. Myself, I see many, many stories on Fark about things I don't particularly care for in movies and music, and I never once feel the need to jump into the thread to let fans of the subject know how much I dislike what they like. If I was in the presence of a conversation in person with people about something I might not like, I might throw my $0.02 in to the actual conversation, but I just don't feel there is a need to go out of my way to read an article, and then join a thread just to voice my dislike about the subject among people who like the subject. Now if it's a subject I enjoy, then I'll maybe make a comment along with the others who share their enjoyment. But if I don't care for it, I just carry on, and have no need to tell the world.

To each his own, though. Some people just have to biatch about everything.
 
2013-11-24 12:36:07 PM  

Neeek: 3StratMan: Neeek: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

Gosh, I can only recall being forced to watch that horrible piece of crap 2 or three times a year for 15 years. My ability to ignore things I was forced to memorize isn't as great as  would hope. The jokes aren't funny, the story is stupid, the characters all deserve to be punched in the junk, and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.

Forced? Really? That speaks volumes about you.

You spend a lot of time in school in the 80s and 90s? I don't recall having a choice about being in class.


Exaggerate much? You can't expect someone to believe that not only did you have a school that had you watch movies (and admittedly my grade school did on occasion), but had you watch the same movie more than once in a school year. Add that supposedly said school system had you watch the same movie multiple times a year every year for 15 years? I call bullshiat. It's ok to not like a movie but you don't need to lie about why.
 
2013-11-24 12:37:43 PM  

Englebert Slaptyback: Valiente

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.


Not bad, but Albert Finney Scrooge is best Scrooge.


Maybe, but Bloo's take on the ghosts was priceless - Bob Marley, Ghost of A Christmas preset, Ghost of Christmas future (beep, boop).

/ Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends
 
2013-11-24 12:45:22 PM  
www.dingsbeerblog.com
 
2013-11-24 12:46:34 PM  

Adolf Oliver Nipples: Best Christmas movie ever.


Disagrees:

static4.wikia.nocookie.net
/hot
 
2013-11-24 12:49:46 PM  

Valiente: My Christmas movie list begins and ends with this guy:

[www.cedmagic.com image 400x300]

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.


He was the greatest, but the Bill Murray and Rowan Atkinson versions are also an essential part of the season for me.

I would give 'A Christmas Story' another chance. I wasn't impressed the first time I saw it, but it grew on me.
 
2013-11-24 12:50:39 PM  

dionysusaur: Englebert Slaptyback: Valiente

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.


Not bad, but Albert Finney Scrooge is best Scrooge.

Maybe, but Bloo's take on the ghosts was priceless - Bob Marley, Ghost of A Christmas preset, Ghost of Christmas future (beep, boop).

/ Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends


No Scroogie no cry
 
2013-11-24 12:51:00 PM  

enderthexenocide: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

you're not the only one.  it's an awful movie filled with awful characters, and i'll never understand why anyone likes it.  i mean, i hate adam sandler movies too, but at least i understand why other people like them.  but a christmas story?  i just can't see why anyone would enjoy such a bitter, humorless, painful film.



The problem is that, to enjoy the movie, you have to be old enough to understand that the world was not created at the same time as the  i-phone.
 
2013-11-24 12:57:58 PM  
My mom had worked for Higbees Department store for over 30 years, so me and all my siblings were extras during the Santa shoot... Yes, i slid down the slide.
 
2013-11-24 01:06:47 PM  
That movie and a Muppets Christmas Carol are the only two Christmas movies that I enjoy the fark out of every year around this time.

Yep, 26 years old and I like the Muppets

/suck it haters
 
2013-11-24 01:10:52 PM  

Knarf: That movie and a Muppets Christmas Carol are the only two Christmas movies that I enjoy the fark out of every year around this time.

Yep, 26 years old and I like the Muppets

/suck it haters


We also like National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation- "Don't throw me down Clark!"
 
2013-11-24 01:11:48 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Naddafinga!


That might be my favorite part of the movie.  I think we've all been there; you're so outraged you can't even speak properly.
 
2013-11-24 01:13:33 PM  
The best Xmas movie is Die Hard.
 
2013-11-24 01:20:33 PM  

Tyrone Slothrop: Adolf Oliver Nipples: Best Christmas movie ever.

Disagrees:

[static4.wikia.nocookie.net image 338x913]
/hot


upload.wikimedia.org

A challenger approaches!
 
2013-11-24 01:38:21 PM  

Knarf: That movie and a Muppets Christmas Carol are the only two Christmas movies that I enjoy the fark out of every year around this time.

Yep, 26 years old and I like the Muppets

/suck it haters


35 years old, and I'm not afraid to admit I teared up during the last Muppets movie. The Muppets defined my childhood, are still awesome, and I can't wait to see the next one.

And The Muppet Christmas Carol is the only version of the story that begins the same as the book, by pointing out that Jacob Marley is dead. I consider The Muppet Christmas Carol to exceed all version but perhaps the Albert Finny version. (The scene in the future in which people were literally dancing on Scrooge's coffin singing "Thank you very much" is, to me, the best Christmas Future scene I've ever watched.)

My wife and I always watch Hogfather on Christmas, and to me it's not Christmas without Death attempting "Ho, ho, ho!"

But if we're talking about the Best Christmas Movie of all time, I have only two words: Die Hard.
 
2013-11-24 01:47:05 PM  

3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.


what he said
 
2013-11-24 01:49:00 PM  
Okay, so A Christmas Story, Muppets Christmas Carol, Die Hard, National Lampoons Christmas Vacation, Hogfather, Scrooged and Gremlins Are about the only Christmas movies I can stand around this time of year :)
 
2013-11-24 01:53:33 PM  
My 12 Movies of Christmas:
Christmas Story
Natl. Lampoon's Xmas
Scrooged
Die hard
Nightmare before Christmas
How the Grinch Stole Christmas
Mickey's Christmas Carol
Rudolph the Red Nosed reindeer (Stop Motion)
Hogfather
Bad Santa
Lethal Weapon
Funny Farm
 
2013-11-24 01:55:01 PM  

Knarf: Okay, so A Christmas Story, Muppets Christmas Carol, Die Hard, National Lampoons Christmas Vacation, Hogfather, Scrooged and Gremlins Are about the only Christmas movies I can stand around this time of year :)


And possibly Lethal Weapon :)
 
2013-11-24 01:56:22 PM  
Not even Thanksgiving yet and already I'm farking sick and tired of hearing about x-mas.
 
2013-11-24 02:00:21 PM  
Whoa! 30 years!?  They should pick a day later this year and play it all day!
 
2013-11-24 02:04:52 PM  
Melinda Dillon was so hot
 
2013-11-24 02:05:50 PM  

Neeek: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

Gosh, I can only recall being forced to watch that horrible piece of crap 2 or three times a year for 15 years. My ability to ignore things I was forced to memorize isn't as great as  would hope. The jokes aren't funny, the story is stupid, the characters all deserve to be punched in the junk, and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.


You were forced to watch and memorize a movie? Why didn't you alert the proper authorities?
 
2013-11-24 02:16:26 PM  

shastacola: Neeek: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

Gosh, I can only recall being forced to watch that horrible piece of crap 2 or three times a year for 15 years. My ability to ignore things I was forced to memorize isn't as great as  would hope. The jokes aren't funny, the story is stupid, the characters all deserve to be punched in the junk, and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.

You were forced to watch and memorize a movie? Why didn't you alert the proper authorities?


He attended some very strange schools.  They were made to watch this movie repeatedly, year after year until they could recite every word before they could graduate.
 
2013-11-24 02:22:51 PM  
Haven't seen the movie. Don't own a cell phone either. Maybe if I watch the movie I will get a cell phone? There must be some correlation to the two (maybe some intrepid reporter at fox can figure it all out and find a way to blame obama, with a tie in to benghazi).
 
2013-11-24 02:30:43 PM  
This is my family's favorite christmas movie.

I had read all of Jean Shepard's books years and years before the movie came out, and the first time I watched it, I kept saying things like - "That didn't happen at christmas! It was the easter ham!" Eventually I calmed down about it and just enjoyed it for itself.

My son-in-law doesn't like the movie...I still tease my kid for marrying someone who failed all the family tests by not liking:

Monty Python
The Beatles
A Christmas Story

and on top of all that, he's a Republican!
 
2013-11-24 02:31:26 PM  

Satanic_Hamster: [www.dingsbeerblog.com image 764x1024]


My Christmas beer next year is going to be the Fa-ra-ra-ra-rager.
 
2013-11-24 02:41:55 PM  

silvervial: This is my family's favorite christmas movie.

I had read all of Jean Shepard's books years and years before the movie came out, and the first time I watched it, I kept saying things like - "That didn't happen at christmas! It was the easter ham!" Eventually I calmed down about it and just enjoyed it for itself.

My son-in-law doesn't like the movie...I still tease my kid for marrying someone who failed all the family tests by not liking:

Monty Python
The Beatles
A Christmas Story

and on top of all that, he's a Republican!


I used to read his stuff in my dad's Road and Track mags.  Or maybe it was Car and Driver.  One of those.  Funny guy.
 
2013-11-24 02:55:13 PM  
Challenge lost.

Oh, boy. Let's hope this isn't a big momentum shift.
 
2013-11-24 02:55:50 PM  

Adolf Oliver Nipples: Challenge lost.

Oh, boy. Let's hope this isn't a big momentum shift.


Strike that. Wrong thread. Tab error.
 
2013-11-24 02:57:29 PM  
nitehawkcinema.files.wordpress.com

Scott Farkus... HE HAD YELLOW EYES!

He should be the patron saint of Fark. (Well, TFD and Politics, at least)
 
2013-11-24 03:03:09 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Valiente: I've never got more than 20 minutes into this thing and I'm in the right age demographic, I would assume.

My Christmas movie list begins and ends with this guy:

[www.cedmagic.com image 400x300]

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.

Without question my favorite Christmas movie ever

/I won't watch any other version




The more I watch Muppet Christmas Carol, the more i realize that that version comes the closest to the "feel" of the original the story. It's the only version I've seen that makes the narrator (gonzo) a character of the story....which is also very apparent in the original work.
 
2013-11-24 03:27:51 PM  

Winterlight: BunkyBrewman: "What my wife said to as I saw the Official  Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle display at Walmart."

My wife gave me one for Christmas a few years back. I have it in my office, and it's one of the first things a lot of people comment on when they visit for the first time. Well, that and "You sure have a lot of books, have you read them ALL?"

/ I wish I was kidding about the last part

[img.fark.net image 850x637]


I would comment on your cabinets and shelving set up.  Those look awesome.  Is that a modular setup or custom construction?
 
2013-11-24 03:34:14 PM  
snowshovel:


The more I watch Muppet Christmas Carol, the more i realize that that version comes the closest to the "feel" of the original the story. It's the only version I've seen that makes the narrator (gonzo) a character of the story....which is also very apparent in the original work.

I feel that way about the Mr. MaGoo one.  Very minimalistic.
 
2013-11-24 03:35:28 PM  
All these jerks in the thread complaining about not liking this movie are probably Bumpuses.

/Flick? Flick who?
 
2013-11-24 03:40:01 PM  
Does anybody know if the Lone Ranger's nephew's horse really was named "Victor"?
 
2013-11-24 04:18:11 PM  

peacheslatour: Does anybody know if the Lone Ranger's nephew's horse really was named "Victor"?


Last line about Dan Reid Jr....http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lone_Ranger
 
2013-11-24 04:40:43 PM  

dccc: I would comment on your cabinets and shelving set up.  Those look awesome.  Is that a modular setup or custom construction?


They are custom built units that are modular, in that I can adjust the height of the shelves and how many shelves per column. Covers the wall behind and to the left of my desk, with lower cabinets built in as well.

.
 
2013-11-24 04:44:37 PM  
A Christmas Story will be on in the background all day at my house.  In between the meals and presents and conversations it's just there like a subway and you jump on and off all day.

However, my second favorite Christmas movie is making its way into the rotation:

static.rogerebert.com
 
2013-11-24 05:09:25 PM  

John the Magnificent: enderthexenocide: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

you're not the only one.  it's an awful movie filled with awful characters, and i'll never understand why anyone likes it.  i mean, i hate adam sandler movies too, but at least i understand why other people like them.  but a christmas story?  i just can't see why anyone would enjoy such a bitter, humorless, painful film.


The problem is that, to enjoy the movie, you have to be old enough to understand that the world was not created at the same time as the  i-phone.


I was born in 1979 and this movie is still boring, boring, boring.
 
2013-11-24 05:25:14 PM  
Regarding "A Christmas Carol"- I never liked Dickens. Period. Therefore I never liked any adaptations of "A Christmas Carol" (even the Muppets) until this one...
encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
There's something about Bill Murray wanting to staple antlers to a mouse's head that makes Dickens relatable.
 
2013-11-24 05:33:38 PM  

Dingleberry Dickwad: Neeek: 3StratMan: Neeek: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

Gosh, I can only recall being forced to watch that horrible piece of crap 2 or three times a year for 15 years. My ability to ignore things I was forced to memorize isn't as great as  would hope. The jokes aren't funny, the story is stupid, the characters all deserve to be punched in the junk, and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.

Forced? Really? That speaks volumes about you.

You spend a lot of time in school in the 80s and 90s? I don't recall having a choice about being in class.

Exaggerate much? You can't expect someone to believe that not only did you have a school that had you watch movies (and admittedly my grade school did on occasion), but had you watch the same movie more than once in a school year. Add that supposedly said school system had you watch the same movie multiple times a year every year for 15 years? I call bullshiat. It's ok to not like a movie but you don't need to lie about why.


You guys work in butthurt the way artists work with oils and clay.

/pretty sure I screwed the line up
 
2013-11-24 05:43:24 PM  

3StratMan: PanicMan: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

I come here to talk about my opinions on things. I did not insult anyone personally, you are allowed to feel however you feel and post whatever you like. However, I don't understand your apparent anger over the topic. What did I say that was so upsetting to you?

No anger. Not upset. Just find it strange that people like you have to make it a point to tell everyone online your dislike about the things that they like. Myself, I see many, many stories on Fark about things I don't particularly care for in movies and music, and I never once feel the need to jump into the thread to let fans of the subject know how much I dislike what they like. If I was in the presence of a conversation in person with people about something I might not like, I might throw my $0.02 in to the actual conversation, but I just don't feel there is a need to go out of my way to read an article, and then join a thread just to voice my dislike about the subject among people who like the subject. Now if it's a subject I enjoy, then I'll maybe make a comment along with the others who share their enjoyment. But if I don't care for it, I just carry on, and have no need to tell the world.

To each his own, though. Some people just have to biatch about everything.


You just went out of your way to say that you didn't like that.

/Captain Obvious
 
2013-11-24 05:43:47 PM  

3StratMan: peacheslatour: Does anybody know if the Lone Ranger's nephew's horse really was named "Victor"?

Last line about Dan Reid Jr....http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lone_Ranger


Huh, thanks for the link!
 
2013-11-24 05:52:56 PM  

enderthexenocide: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

you're not the only one.  it's an awful movie filled with awful characters, and i'll never understand why anyone likes it.  i mean, i hate adam sandler movies too, but at least i understand why other people like them.  but a christmas story?  i just can't see why anyone would enjoy such a bitter, humorless, painful film.


Meh, it's better than the 999th rerun of "It's a Wonderful Life."
 
2013-11-24 06:59:55 PM  
In related news, millions of Americans just earned the right to tell youngsters to get off their lawn.

/I was four years old back then
//thought it was one of the two greatest movies I'd ever seen when I first saw it on TV
///Ghostbusters was the other
 
2013-11-24 07:08:09 PM  
When I saw Slap Shot and realized the topless women in bed with Paul Newman was Ralphie's mom, I cackled.

/her nipples will shoot your eye out
 
2013-11-24 07:21:18 PM  

enderthexenocide: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

you're not the only one.  it's an awful movie filled with awful characters, and i'll never understand why anyone likes it.  i mean, i hate adam sandler movies too, but at least i understand why other people like them.  but a christmas story?  i just can't see why anyone would enjoy such a bitter, humorless, painful film.


How's it awful?

It's a young boy growing up. he experiences youthful exuberance, frustration, anger. He grows closer to both his mother (during the Scott Farkus affair) and his father (with the BB gun), he suffers setbacks but overcomes them, and in the end is rewarded for his diligence. And his great reward is CHinese food. And it gave us "Frag-il-le, it must be Italian."

It's a perfect movie.
 
2013-11-24 08:05:36 PM  

zombiegoat: When I saw Slap Shot and realized the topless women in bed with Paul Newman was Ralphie's mom, I cackled.

/her nipples will shoot your eye out


*double take*

I'll have to check that out again.  Thanks for the tip.
 
2013-11-24 09:19:46 PM  
Add Trading Places to the list of favorite Xmas movies.
 
2013-11-24 09:45:08 PM  

Adolf Oliver Nipples: Best Christmas movie ever. Between now and New Year's I'll have it on at least 10 times, and I'll watch it at least twice during the 24 hour marathon.


Christmas Vacation looks in your direction while you notice the odor that tells you that the shaiter is full.
 
2013-11-24 10:05:45 PM  

SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.


www.legalteamusa.net 

What are you gonna do about? Ya gonna cry? Cry, baby. Cry! WAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
 
2013-11-24 10:08:26 PM  

dustman81: [thilllogistics.com image 659x413]
A crummy commercial? Son-of-a-biatch


Sadly, Ovaltine has been "reformulated" into Quik in a slightly more expensive container since Nestle bought up the company a few years back. I sent them an email via their website about what a bucket of Grinch runs they have turned Ovaltine into, and in mid-January they mailed me a coupon for a free jar. Dafuq?
 
2013-11-24 10:46:30 PM  

John the Magnificent: The problem is that, to enjoy the movie, you have to be old enough to understand that the world was not created at the same time as the  i-phone.


i grew up in the 80s before there were even computers, and i hated the movie back then.

i think the movie is enjoyed by people who secretly hated their childhood, because the kid in the movie just suffers one terrible setback after another.  santa kicks him in the face.  his parents humiliate him with that stupid bunny costume.  and then he gets his desired gift and promptly hurts himself with it.  their christmas dinner is ruined.  the movie is like a long list of bad childhood memories.  so people who hate their childhood can watch the movie and laugh because they know what it's like.
 
2013-11-24 10:48:29 PM  
FUUUUUUUUDDDDDDDDGGGGGGGEEEEEEE

/except I didn't say "fudge"
 
2013-11-24 10:51:31 PM  

enderthexenocide: John the Magnificent: The problem is that, to enjoy the movie, you have to be old enough to understand that the world was not created at the same time as the  i-phone.

i grew up in the 80s before there were even computers, and i hated the movie back then.

i think the movie is enjoyed by people who secretly hated their childhood, because the kid in the movie just suffers one terrible setback after another.  santa kicks him in the face.  his parents humiliate him with that stupid bunny costume.  and then he gets his desired gift and promptly hurts himself with it.  their christmas dinner is ruined.  the movie is like a long list of bad childhood memories.  so people who hate their childhood can watch the movie and laugh because they know what it's like.


Can't tell if you're joking or really really unperceptive or being intentionally stupid. Sure there's a lot of bad shiat that happens, but despite all the setbacks and injuries they're still a family that loves each other and don't let the setbacks keep them down.
 
2013-11-25 01:22:34 AM  

kendelrio: FUUUUUUUUDDDDDDDDGGGGGGGEEEEEEE

/except I didn't say "fudge"

Only I didn't say "Fudge." I said THE word, the big one, the queen-mother of dirty words, the "F-dash-dash-dash" word!
*What* did you say?
Uh, um...
That's... what I thought you said. Get in the car. Go on!
It was all over - I was dead. What would it be? The guillotine? Hanging? The chair? The rack? The Chinese water torture? Hmmph. Mere child's play compared to what surely awaited me.

 
2013-11-25 03:32:38 AM  
thilllogistics.com
nuestropensar.files.wordpress.com

We cracked the code!
 
2013-11-25 08:55:14 AM  

Fano: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

In God I trust, all others pay cash.


Exactly, they clicked on a thread about a 30 yo movie they don't like, yet scroll to the bottom to type out their distaste?
 
2013-11-25 09:04:58 AM  

Cretony38: Fano: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

In God I trust, all others pay cash.

Exactly, they clicked on a thread about a 30 yo movie they don't like, yet scroll to the bottom to type out their distaste?


Hey, let your freak flag fly. I go into Jennifer Lawrence threads to say she's not all that, which is a sin on par with killing a mockingjay.

Still, outside of movie criticism, it's a cheap shot like saying you hate old yeller
 
2013-11-25 10:16:09 AM  
Ralphie opening the BB gun is the dustiest moment in the history of movies. I tear up every time.
 
2013-11-25 10:16:12 AM  

3StratMan: Valiente: I've never got more than 20 minutes into this thing and I'm in the right age demographic, I would assume.

My Christmas movie list begins and ends with this guy:

[www.cedmagic.com image 400x300]

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.

Begs to differ...
[www.cedmagic.com image 400x300]


Agreed! Also featured the greatest Marley and Ghost of Christmas Present ever:

upload.wikimedia.org   www.cedmagic.com
 
2013-11-25 02:24:06 PM  

Cretony38: Fano: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

In God I trust, all others pay cash.

Exactly, they clicked on a thread about a 30 yo movie they don't like, yet scroll to the bottom to type out their distaste?


There's a War On A Christmas Story.
 
2013-11-25 03:31:22 PM  

TimSTP: 3StratMan: Valiente: I've never got more than 20 minutes into this thing and I'm in the right age demographic, I would assume.

My Christmas movie list begins and ends with this guy:

[www.cedmagic.com image 400x300]

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.

Begs to differ...
[www.cedmagic.com image 400x300]

Agreed! Also featured the greatest Marley and Ghost of Christmas Present ever:

[upload.wikimedia.org image 400x300]   [www.cedmagic.com image 400x300]


George C. Scott version is definitely my favorite (in no small part because of the incredible Ghost of Christmas Present) but props must be given to the 1999 version, featuring Captain Picard as Scrooge, Detective McNulty as Nephew Fred, Emperor Winston Churchill/Baron Vladimir Harkonnen as Fezziwig, and Lady Jessica Atreides as Mrs. Cratchit. That, my friends, is an all-star cast!

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0216621/
 
2013-11-25 04:43:14 PM  
A little-known sequel to A Christmas Story was done in 1988, Titled Ollie Hopnoodle's Haven of Bliss.

Youtube link to part one... Horrible VHS transfer with even worse sound, but it's still worth a chuckle or three..

Ralphie's summer job is a riot!
 
Displayed 112 of 112 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report