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(Failure Magazine)   It's the 30th anniversary of 'A Christmas Story'. Green light this link? I double-dog dare you. No, I triple-dog dare ya   (failuremag.com) divider line 112
    More: Sappy, A Christmas Story, Christmas Day, teen movies, It's a Wonderful Life, Siskel, sex comedy, Porky, flight schools  
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1337 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 24 Nov 2013 at 11:16 AM (43 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



112 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2013-11-24 05:19:32 AM
I think you may have breached protocol there, Subby.
 
2013-11-24 08:59:08 AM
You can't have a green light.

You
'll shoot your eye outkid.
 
2013-11-24 09:02:33 AM
BOOM!!
 
2013-11-24 09:20:38 AM

corq: You'll shoot your eye out,  kid.


Oh, I know this answer:  What is...
"What my wife said to as I saw the Official  Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle display at Walmart."

/but now it's 600 shot!
 
2013-11-24 09:23:47 AM
"From the creators of Porky's!"
 
2013-11-24 09:49:49 AM
That makes Ralphie...forty-two!

i218.photobucket.com

/You'll throw your back out, kid!
 
2013-11-24 09:56:17 AM
SONSOFBIATCHESBUMPESSES !11!!
 
2013-11-24 10:18:10 AM
Naddafinga!
 
2013-11-24 10:21:01 AM

corq: You can't have a green light.


Yeah, I'm afraid you're wrong there
 
2013-11-24 10:29:10 AM
"well it's a blue ball! it's a bowling ball!"

love that line.
 
2013-11-24 10:51:38 AM
I really hate this movie.
 
2013-11-24 10:58:24 AM

SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.


That just goes to show you are a bad person!

I mean I HATE Christmas, even I like this movie.
 
2013-11-24 11:06:06 AM
Best Christmas movie ever. Between now and New Year's I'll have it on at least 10 times, and I'll watch it at least twice during the 24 hour marathon.
 
2013-11-24 11:06:13 AM
and it's playing at NYC's Empire 25 at 2 pm today.
Getting my ticket now
 
2013-11-24 11:28:03 AM
Nadafinga!
 
2013-11-24 11:28:04 AM

Adolf Oliver Nipples: Best Christmas movie ever. Between now and New Year's I'll have it on at least 10 times, and I'll watch it at least twice during the 24 hour marathon.


It's replaced the Yule log as Christmas Morning viewing.
 
2013-11-24 11:32:38 AM
My favorite line:

"Daddy's gonna kill Ralphie"

I don't know why but I love that line/scene and then when Ralphie realizes that his mom is going to cover for him.
 
2013-11-24 11:33:24 AM

SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.


Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.
 
2013-11-24 11:33:36 AM
Only if you drink this 30 year old ovaltine  subby.
 
2013-11-24 11:41:28 AM
thilllogistics.com
A crummy commercial? Son-of-a-biatch
 
2013-11-24 11:42:37 AM

SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.


you're not the only one.  it's an awful movie filled with awful characters, and i'll never understand why anyone likes it.  i mean, i hate adam sandler movies too, but at least i understand why other people like them.  but a christmas story?  i just can't see why anyone would enjoy such a bitter, humorless, painful film.
 
2013-11-24 11:47:21 AM

PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.


And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.
 
2013-11-24 11:47:38 AM

SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.


So do I. My wife loves it for some reason.

enderthexenocide: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

you're not the only one.  it's an awful movie filled with awful characters, and i'll never understand why anyone likes it.  i mean, i hate adam sandler movies too, but at least i understand why other people like them.  but a christmas story?  i just can't see why anyone would enjoy such a bitter, humorless, painful film.


My wife thinks I am just being a contrarian, but I didn't like one minute of that movie. Just, ugh.
 
2013-11-24 11:47:58 AM

enderthexenocide: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

you're not the only one.  it's an awful movie filled with awful characters, and i'll never understand why anyone likes it.  i mean, i hate adam sandler movies too, but at least i understand why other people like them.  but a christmas story?  i just can't see why anyone would enjoy such a bitter, humorless, painful film.


3.bp.blogspot.com

/hot like that overloaded wall socket
 
2013-11-24 11:48:38 AM

3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.


In God I trust, all others pay cash.
 
2013-11-24 11:53:14 AM
Do you people just wake up in the morning and say to yourselves "Hey, I'm gonna spend my day on the computer finding threads about things I don't like, and make sure to comment on them to make sure everyone knows how much I dislike what they like?".
 
2013-11-24 11:56:40 AM

3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.


Gosh, I can only recall being forced to watch that horrible piece of crap 2 or three times a year for 15 years. My ability to ignore things I was forced to memorize isn't as great as  would hope. The jokes aren't funny, the story is stupid, the characters all deserve to be punched in the junk, and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.
 
2013-11-24 11:56:47 AM
Wow, feeling old.
 
2013-11-24 12:02:38 PM

BunkyBrewman: "What my wife said to as I saw the Official  Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle display at Walmart."


My wife gave me one for Christmas a few years back. I have it in my office, and it's one of the first things a lot of people comment on when they visit for the first time. Well, that and "You sure have a lot of books, have you read them ALL?"

/ I wish I was kidding about the last part

img.fark.net
 
2013-11-24 12:03:51 PM
Fra-geel-eh! It must be Italian!
 
2013-11-24 12:06:09 PM
One comment for every year since the movie came out, and not one fah rah rah?  For shame, Fark.
 
2013-11-24 12:09:25 PM

Neeek: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

Gosh, I can only recall being forced to watch that horrible piece of crap 2 or three times a year for 15 years. My ability to ignore things I was forced to memorize isn't as great as  would hope. The jokes aren't funny, the story is stupid, the characters all deserve to be punched in the junk, and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.


Forced? Really? That speaks volumes about you.
 
2013-11-24 12:09:27 PM

3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.


......

/did I just read that?
 
2013-11-24 12:10:00 PM
I've never got more than 20 minutes into this thing and I'm in the right age demographic, I would assume.

My Christmas movie list begins and ends with this guy:

www.cedmagic.com

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.
 
2013-11-24 12:11:32 PM

Winterlight: "You sure have a lot of books, have you read them ALL?"

/ I wish I was kidding


It's a fair question. My father has ADD and probably hasn't read a single book cover to cover in his entire life, but has 4 bookshelves full of books.
 
2013-11-24 12:12:54 PM
"It's SMILING at us"...
www.redstaplerchronicles.com
Deck the horrs with bawrs of horry, fa ra ra ra ra, ra ra ra ra!
 
2013-11-24 12:13:44 PM

3StratMan: Neeek: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

Gosh, I can only recall being forced to watch that horrible piece of crap 2 or three times a year for 15 years. My ability to ignore things I was forced to memorize isn't as great as  would hope. The jokes aren't funny, the story is stupid, the characters all deserve to be punched in the junk, and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.

Forced? Really? That speaks volumes about you.


You spend a lot of time in school in the 80s and 90s? I don't recall having a choice about being in class.
 
2013-11-24 12:14:42 PM

Valiente: I've never got more than 20 minutes into this thing and I'm in the right age demographic, I would assume.

My Christmas movie list begins and ends with this guy:

[www.cedmagic.com image 400x300]

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.


Without question my favorite Christmas movie ever

/I won't watch any other version
 
2013-11-24 12:15:24 PM

3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.


I come here to talk about my opinions on things. I did not insult anyone personally, you are allowed to feel however you feel and post whatever you like. However, I don't understand your apparent anger over the topic. What did I say that was so upsetting to you?
 
2013-11-24 12:16:05 PM
Subby uses all the glue ON PURPOSE!!!
 
2013-11-24 12:18:35 PM

Neeek: ...and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.


Wait, what? Jean Shepherd (the movie is semi-autobiograpical) is a legendary storyteller. It's too bad he's dead, he could read the phone book and make it entertaining.
 
2013-11-24 12:19:00 PM

Valiente: I've never got more than 20 minutes into this thing and I'm in the right age demographic, I would assume.

My Christmas movie list begins and ends with this guy:

[www.cedmagic.com image 400x300]

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.


Begs to differ...
www.cedmagic.com
 
2013-11-24 12:19:27 PM
You used up all the glue... ON PURPOSE!

/McGavin's delivery of this line was priceless.
 
2013-11-24 12:20:00 PM
Jebus. Can we get a little icon displayed next to the Fark threads that have devolved into pissy group therapy? I truly hope you folks are this passionate in all areas of your lives.

/came for fa-ra-ra-ra-ra jokes
//leaving yellow-eyed
 
2013-11-24 12:24:59 PM
"and another time we had an entire busload of people dressed in pink bunny suits."

Yikes! I'll think of that next Tour-Bus season.
 
2013-11-24 12:26:55 PM

Valiente


It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.


Not bad, but Albert Finney Scrooge is best Scrooge.
 
2013-11-24 12:33:41 PM

Bondith: One comment for every year since the movie came out, and not one fah rah rah?  For shame, Fark.


My favorite scene in the movie....
 
2013-11-24 12:35:46 PM

PanicMan: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

I come here to talk about my opinions on things. I did not insult anyone personally, you are allowed to feel however you feel and post whatever you like. However, I don't understand your apparent anger over the topic. What did I say that was so upsetting to you?


No anger. Not upset. Just find it strange that people like you have to make it a point to tell everyone online your dislike about the things that they like. Myself, I see many, many stories on Fark about things I don't particularly care for in movies and music, and I never once feel the need to jump into the thread to let fans of the subject know how much I dislike what they like. If I was in the presence of a conversation in person with people about something I might not like, I might throw my $0.02 in to the actual conversation, but I just don't feel there is a need to go out of my way to read an article, and then join a thread just to voice my dislike about the subject among people who like the subject. Now if it's a subject I enjoy, then I'll maybe make a comment along with the others who share their enjoyment. But if I don't care for it, I just carry on, and have no need to tell the world.

To each his own, though. Some people just have to biatch about everything.
 
2013-11-24 12:36:07 PM

Neeek: 3StratMan: Neeek: 3StratMan: PanicMan: SecretAgentWoman: I really hate this movie.

Thank god I thought I was the only one.  The movie is boring at best.  But then they play it over and over and over.

And yet you just HAVE to let everyone know this on the comment thread, instead of just ignoring it and moving along. And I'm sure you also just HAVE to convey your dislike of the movie as often as possible to as many people that do like the movie as you can.

I guess I am just lucky enough to have an ignore button inside my head, so I can pretty much tune out TV/movies/music that I have a dislike for, and not feel the need to piss on the parade of people who like the things that I don't care for.

Gosh, I can only recall being forced to watch that horrible piece of crap 2 or three times a year for 15 years. My ability to ignore things I was forced to memorize isn't as great as  would hope. The jokes aren't funny, the story is stupid, the characters all deserve to be punched in the junk, and the narrator's voice makes me want to stab someone.

Forced? Really? That speaks volumes about you.

You spend a lot of time in school in the 80s and 90s? I don't recall having a choice about being in class.


Exaggerate much? You can't expect someone to believe that not only did you have a school that had you watch movies (and admittedly my grade school did on occasion), but had you watch the same movie more than once in a school year. Add that supposedly said school system had you watch the same movie multiple times a year every year for 15 years? I call bullshiat. It's ok to not like a movie but you don't need to lie about why.
 
2013-11-24 12:37:43 PM

Englebert Slaptyback: Valiente

It holds up because he was the greatest Scrooge ever.


Not bad, but Albert Finney Scrooge is best Scrooge.


Maybe, but Bloo's take on the ghosts was priceless - Bob Marley, Ghost of A Christmas preset, Ghost of Christmas future (beep, boop).

/ Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends
 
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