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(Cheezburger)   If you're going on vacation for three weeks, don't show your co-workers this article   (cheezburger.com) divider line 83
    More: Amusing  
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22239 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Nov 2013 at 11:40 AM (47 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-11-24 10:06:05 AM  
I'd want it for about a day and then clear it out.
 
2013-11-24 10:54:40 AM  
Why am I so amused at the ream-of-paper-used-as-a-monitor-stand? There is probably at least 30 reams of paper at our office being used that way.

/ok, grass is amusing
 
2013-11-24 11:45:20 AM  
i don't work in an office, so no worries there.  i might, however, come back to discover my locker is filled with condoms or something like that.  my coworkers are a very mature bunch.
 
2013-11-24 11:45:59 AM  
thank you Subby. i LOL'd heartily, to the point of choking and coughing. dammit that was good.
 
2013-11-24 11:47:12 AM  
Awesome, I'd keep it.
 
2013-11-24 11:48:28 AM  
Bet he tells them to "Sod off" when he returns
 
2013-11-24 11:52:26 AM  
Cheezburger posts are articles now?
 
2013-11-24 11:54:16 AM  
You could replace his mouse with a little hand-held lawnmower.
 
2013-11-24 11:54:22 AM  

SecretAgentWoman: Why am I so amused at the ream-of-paper-used-as-a-monitor-stand? There is probably at least 30 reams of paper at our office being used that way.


i.imgur.com
 
2013-11-24 11:54:50 AM  
I thought the days were gone, when you could earn a great salary for farking around and making a mess of your workplace.  And wasting power running growlights.

Rock on, modern-day dilettantes.
 
2013-11-24 11:55:43 AM  

SecretAgentWoman: Why am I so amused at the ream-of-paper-used-as-a-monitor-stand? There is probably at least 30 reams of paper at our office being used that way.

/ok, grass is amusing


Because when LCD monitors first came out they had vertically adjustable stands and now you can't even buy one with a VESA bolt pattern so you could adjust their farking height. Ergonomics was such a concern, now you're expected to fark off and die.
 
2013-11-24 11:55:54 AM  
This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.
 
2013-11-24 11:56:57 AM  

Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.


But then the grass would run wild!
 
2013-11-24 11:58:13 AM  
And we thought we were clever stealing the wheels off our Scrum Master's chair and replacing the photo on his desk with a small-faced version of it.
 
2013-11-24 11:58:32 AM  

DOCTORD000M: Cheezburger posts are articles now?


Hey look everyone! It's "that guy".
 
2013-11-24 11:58:43 AM  
Not would I have loved that prank if had been done to me, I would have kept it as is and built on it. Keep the a sun lamp. Add a long panoramic photo of the sky. Then play some sounds of nature cds or mp3s. (Low enough not to bother my co-workers.) In the middle of winter where everything is bleak outside, this would make me look forward to coming to work.
 
2013-11-24 11:59:32 AM  
I'm sure that growing it in place was fun, but sod is cheap.
Just cut it to fit.
 
2013-11-24 11:59:38 AM  

SecretAgentWoman: Why am I so amused at the ream-of-paper-used-as-a-monitor-stand? There is probably at least 30 reams of paper at our office being used that way.

/ok, grass is amusing


We would just stack up coding books for dead technologies, left over from the days of print.
 
2013-11-24 11:59:56 AM  
What's this "vacation" you speak of?
 
2013-11-24 12:02:33 PM  
Meh my keyboard already looks like that, come to think of it so does my beard, it may be time to wash em both
 
2013-11-24 12:04:40 PM  

Snarfangel: Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.

But then the grass would run wild!


Do you want field mice? Because this is how we get field mice!
 
2013-11-24 12:08:22 PM  

FriarReb98: I'd want it for about a day and then clear it out.


looks cool but itchy!
 
2013-11-24 12:11:36 PM  

wildcardjack: SecretAgentWoman: Why am I so amused at the ream-of-paper-used-as-a-monitor-stand? There is probably at least 30 reams of paper at our office being used that way.

/ok, grass is amusing

Because when LCD monitors first came out they had vertically adjustable stands and now you can't even buy one with a VESA bolt pattern so you could adjust their farking height. Ergonomics was such a concern, now you're expected to fark off and die.


Dell Ultrasharp or other higher end "business" monitors are all still fully adjustable. Most people just settle for cheap crap and make it look even cheaper and crappier by using phone books or copier paper to raise them off the desk.
 
2013-11-24 12:15:35 PM  

SecretAgentWoman: Why am I so amused at the ream-of-paper-used-as-a-monitor-stand? There is probably at least 30 reams of paper at our office being used that way.

/ok, grass is amusing


I have close to 10 in my office acting as monitor stands, keeping my computer a few inches off the carpet, etc.
 
2013-11-24 12:17:09 PM  
Goofing of at work, pranks like this are rife in the film industry, we are constantly under the gun and stuff like this happens a lot to alleviate the tension. I've had my mountain bike hung 135ft in an industrial crane, we've been fooled by Will Smith that it was his birthday and been convinced by the ADs (on a remote shoot) that my new car was being joy ridden through Oregon.... I've always enjoyed it and I'm the first to laugh.The people that don't find it funny are often the same that are fragile and humorless that go by the wayside quickly.
 
2013-11-24 12:20:22 PM  
The nice part about where I work is that any prank against me also affects everybody else on shift. Neener neener.
 
2013-11-24 12:22:55 PM  
The best prank I ever had done to me while out for 3 weeks of vacation was this:

You know those slots that cubicles have so you can insert brackets and hang table tops, cabinets, wall, etc.? Yeah. My coworkers spend time weaving multicolored yarn in and out of all of them and essentially sewed my entire cubicle shut. But wait, there's more! They they tied more yarn to old AOL and useless driver CD's that they hung from the ceiling with scotch tape. And for the finale they tied my mouse and keyboard wires with more yarn that they ran behind my monitor, down the back of my desk, and to the base of my chair.

So I get back to work and behold. The CDs are rotating and shining light everywhere like some weird disco above the cocoon which was previously my cubicle. We have a good laugh. I spend the next 10 minutes searching for scissors. I find them and proceed to cut away all of the yarn. Not just across the front entrance mind you, but the entire top portion they have sewn shut as well! It is totally sealed! This takes about another 15-20 minutes.

My hand now hurt from these tiny scissors, and I just need to get to work. I then reach down to my keyboard to begin typing my login, and fling my chair back at the same time as I always do. So right as I'm about to make contact with the keyboard, IT GOES FLYING BACK AWAY FROM ME! More hilarity ensues.

Another 5 or so minutes later after I finish cutting all the yarn off my keyboard and mouse, I sit down and log in. Phone rings I take a call. Suddenly I get bonked on the head by a falling AOL CD! More hilarity ensues. I figure that I'll wait until lunch to take them down, but after getting hit 3 more times within the next hour, I have to take another 30 minutes to find a ladder to climb up and rip all those CDs down.

To this day, even though it was my desk, it was the funniest thing I've ever seen in the office.
 
2013-11-24 12:23:18 PM  
Wish my co workers like me enough to pull a cool stunt like that. One time I went on vacation and when I came back, I saw someone in the hallway who asked how I was. I said great, my vacation was awesome. They replied they didn't realize I was even gone.
 
2013-11-24 12:24:47 PM  

Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.


I don't know about your field, but in mine we are expected to bill clients a certain number of hours each month.  If we hit or exceed our billable requirement, no one gives a rip what we do.  Since our billable hour requirements are pretty high, TPTB know better than to attempt to quash harmless stress relievers like this one.

That said, I've never exerted myself further than replacing a co-worker's metal paper clips with (much hated) plastic ones.
 
2013-11-24 12:25:25 PM  

noitsnot: I thought the days were gone, when you could earn a great salary for farking around and making a mess of your workplace.  And wasting power running growlights.

Rock on, modern-day dilettantes.


Meanwhile, in the private sector....
 
2013-11-24 12:26:04 PM  

Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.


2.bp.blogspot.com
There's always one.
 
2013-11-24 12:26:35 PM  
Just need to toss in some crickets, a couple frogs, a small pond and maybe a salamander and your own workplace ecosystem.
 
2013-11-24 12:26:56 PM  

enderthexenocide: i don't work in an office, so no worries there.  i might, however, come back to discover my locker is filled with condoms or something like that.  my coworkers are a very mature bunch.


A locker full of used condoms would be both hilarious and horrifying...a good chuckle while calling in a biohazard clean-up team.
 
2013-11-24 12:29:40 PM  

missmez: Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.

I don't know about your field, but in mine we are expected to bill clients a certain number of hours each month.  If we hit or exceed our billable requirement, no one gives a rip what we do.  Since our billable hour requirements are pretty high, TPTB know better than to attempt to quash harmless stress relievers like this one.

That said, I've never exerted myself further than replacing a co-worker's metal paper clips with (much hated) plastic ones.



So you do a credible amount of work, then type 40 into the time tracking system, and it's party time!
 
2013-11-24 12:30:56 PM  

Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.


You'd be doing them a favor, sounds like they have a crap boss, anyway.
 
2013-11-24 12:32:57 PM  

Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.


you're either a blast at parties or the guy complaining about the food choice of said party...
 
2013-11-24 12:34:42 PM  

Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.


Yup. And then your dumbs would be paying unemployment.
 
2013-11-24 12:35:16 PM  

noitsnot: missmez: Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.

I don't know about your field, but in mine we are expected to bill clients a certain number of hours each month.  If we hit or exceed our billable requirement, no one gives a rip what we do.  Since our billable hour requirements are pretty high, TPTB know better than to attempt to quash harmless stress relievers like this one.

That said, I've never exerted myself further than replacing a co-worker's metal paper clips with (much hated) plastic ones.


So you do a credible amount of work, then type 40 into the time tracking system, and it's party time!


No, I'm a paralegal.  I do the work, bill the work and an attorney bills at a vastly inflated rate for "supervising" me.
 
2013-11-24 12:39:59 PM  
This is what I need.

I keep blowing out my knee at my current desk, which is covered in astro-turf.
 
2013-11-24 12:40:44 PM  

Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.


Glad I don't work for you then. You sound like the kind of micro-managing imbecile that monitors bathroom breaks.
 
2013-11-24 12:41:55 PM  
I'd keep it. Maybe paint yard lines and put up some pencil goal posts.
 
2013-11-24 12:46:22 PM  

Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.


1.bp.blogspot.com

If you are that kind of boss, you'd be the one out of a job. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Work-to-rule  Your employees would learn to give you exactly what you ask, nothing more, God help you if you don't precisely predict every. single. scenario. that might come up, because every time they find something "not in the spec" they'll come to you for your input. Work would slow to nearly nothing because you would be the only one capable of doing work, since none of your reports would be allowed the responsibility for independent action.

And wow, lighten up. Some people are having a hard life so don't dare have any fun?
 
2013-11-24 12:46:42 PM  
Must be nice to work for the Government.
 
2013-11-24 12:47:09 PM  

Carousel Beast: Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.

Glad I don't work for you then. You sound like the kind of micro-managing imbecile that monitors bathroom breaks.


Hah. That reminds me of the time I posted a "microwave usage log" on a clipboard in the break room. It had fields for power level, time, item cooked, and a space for initials. It got filled out about halfway down the page when one of the managers found it and went on a rampage. They never found out who did it.
 
2013-11-24 12:50:18 PM  
They should add some deer poop by the router.
 
2013-11-24 12:52:34 PM  
This is why we need to legalise cannabis.
 
2013-11-24 12:54:45 PM  

Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.


I would imagine the only people who are willing to work for you are people who can't find any other job.  This probably explains why you feel the need to be so controlling: because the people who work for you are not very good at their jobs.
 
2013-11-24 01:00:29 PM  

Gifted Many Few: This is a shame. A few threads down you have people being evicted from a motel that would probably be appreciative of a decent wage and then you have these people that have nothing better to do than fool around like this. These people would be fired on the spot if they were on my team.


Seriously. We have fun at my place of work without having to resort to making life difficult for one another. It IS possible to have fun without being a jerk to others, folks.
 
2013-11-24 01:04:58 PM  
Who the hell gets to go on vacation for 3 weeks?!
 
2013-11-24 01:11:23 PM  
i16.photobucket.com
 
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