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(Mirror.co.uk)   Judge spares long-time drug dealer from prison and allows him to spend Christmas with his daughter, the first time in 15 years he has not been in jail for the holidays. "I am going to give you the best Christmas present you could ever hope for"   (mirror.co.uk) divider line 38
    More: Sappy, jail, Kinder Surprise, custodial sentence, holidays  
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4548 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Nov 2013 at 11:20 AM (20 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



38 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-11-22 09:50:31 AM
YOU SHOULD SEE MY MERKIN
i2.mirror.co.uk
 
2013-11-22 10:07:49 AM
Lucy: Ricky, a good father doesn't go to jail every year, OK?
Ricky: Some do!
 
2013-11-22 10:08:05 AM
It will be interesting to see if the fark up, farks it up,.
 
2013-11-22 11:22:15 AM
UK Paper = It didn't happen.
 
2013-11-22 11:22:47 AM

basemetal: It will be interesting to see if the fark up, farks it up,.


The fark up will probably fark it up.  The fark up has done it for the last fifteen years.
 
2013-11-22 11:23:35 AM
Is this an article about Merck member of the Board?
 
2013-11-22 11:23:41 AM

stpauler: YOU SHOULD SEE MY MERKIN
[i2.mirror.co.uk image 615x409]


Jeremy Clarkson's long-lost twin brother is a judge?
 
2013-11-22 11:27:23 AM
The wig. I want it. Really.
 
2013-11-22 11:29:30 AM
"I am going to give you the best Christmas present you could ever hope for"

Let me guess....drugs?
 
2013-11-22 11:29:48 AM

DrSansabeltNoShiatSlacks: The wig. I want it. Really.


You promise to take care of it? Feed it? Walk and wear it every day?
 
2013-11-22 11:31:46 AM
No Touching!
 
2013-11-22 11:35:10 AM
A shanking holiday?
 
2013-11-22 11:35:13 AM
"Grumpy Cat: You promise to take care of it? Feed it? Walk and wear it every day?"

I'll brush it twice a day and I'll keep the Moths out, that's all I can commit to at this point.
 
2013-11-22 11:35:14 AM

Grumpy Cat: DrSansabeltNoShiatSlacks: The wig. I want it. Really.

You promise to take care of it? Feed it? Walk and wear it every day?


And he will require water, and you must provide him with a sand box. And you must talk to him. Tell him he is a pretty wig ... and a good wig.
 
2013-11-22 11:36:36 AM
Xmas fark submission "Father of the year candidate busted/brought daughter to drug deal on Xmas eve."
 
2013-11-22 11:37:27 AM
Just read the article - no sympathy for the offender.

As others in this thread already stated, I'd be willing to bet that he screws it up somehow and still won't get to see his kid over Christmas.
 
2013-11-22 11:37:31 AM
Well, it's not like sending him to jail appears to be doing anything useful, so the judge might as well.
 
2013-11-22 11:39:21 AM
It's a catch-and-release program this year.
 
2013-11-22 11:44:07 AM
I'm sure the father will be happy, but will the daughter?

He's been in jail her entire life, and obviously hasn't been a part of Xmas so far. I think it will be awkward for her, assuming - as others have mentioned - that Nigel Lose-a-lot even manages not to screw up yet again.
 
2013-11-22 11:44:38 AM
He'll get busted doing some Christmas Shoplifting.
 
2013-11-22 11:44:46 AM
I'll be stoned for Christmas.
 
2013-11-22 11:46:32 AM
So sentencing his daughter to spend Christmas with her "father" is a good idea? Maybe his daughter doesn't want him around.  Having a scumbag for a parent does that to you.
 
2013-11-22 11:49:17 AM

Millennium: Grumpy Cat: DrSansabeltNoShiatSlacks: The wig. I want it. Really.

You promise to take care of it? Feed it? Walk and wear it every day?

And he will require water, and you must provide him with a sand box. And you must talk to him. Tell him he is a pretty wig ... and a good wig.


Setting up a play date with other wigs would be nice from time to time.
 
2013-11-22 11:50:19 AM
I'm sure she'll be very well adjusted. What could possibly go wrong for a girl with daddy issues?
 
2013-11-22 11:53:15 AM

js34603: I'm sure she'll be very well adjusted. What could possibly go wrong for a girl with daddy issues?


I'll be in my bunk.
 
2013-11-22 11:58:43 AM

KrispyKritter: Millennium: Grumpy Cat: DrSansabeltNoShiatSlacks: The wig. I want it. Really.

You promise to take care of it? Feed it? Walk and wear it every day?

And he will require water, and you must provide him with a sand box. And you must talk to him. Tell him he is a pretty wig ... and a good wig.

Setting up a play date with other wigs would be nice from time to time.


That's a good idea. Also, maybe get a second one. I mean, who wants to be the only wig in the house?
 
2013-11-22 11:59:21 AM
We're supposed to feel sympathy for the world's dumbest drug dealer?
 
2013-11-22 12:05:13 PM
Waste of effort.  The douchebag will be in prison before then, so no harm done, really.
 
2013-11-22 12:34:19 PM
s3.amazonaws.com
 
2013-11-22 12:48:30 PM
I'm sure the girl's mother is thrilled about the prospect of having a drug-addicted thief in her home for the holiday.  Unless the judge is suggesting that a teen girl should go to a halfway house to spend the holiday.
 
2013-11-22 12:50:10 PM
images.wikia.com
 
2013-11-22 12:54:10 PM

Just_a_Bear: We're supposed to feel sympathy for the world's dumbest drug dealer?


According to the major religious traditions, we're supposed to feel compassion for everyone.

Except Objectivists. The good Lord sayeth: "f*ck them."
 
2013-11-22 01:15:32 PM
Well I wonder what he will steal her for christmas. Stolen bacon mmmmmmmmmmm
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-11-22 01:16:13 PM

Zeb Hesselgresser: [s3.amazonaws.com image 850x637]


A link with a NSFW would be nice. And certainly called for.
 
2013-11-22 01:18:47 PM
It figures

the judge is batty
 
2013-11-22 01:31:17 PM
Here I will come to advocate for the drug dealer.  Anyone who's never been addicted to heroine (or anything else, for that matter), couldn't possibly understand this guy's compulsion to do what it takes to get his hands on the drugs.  What he needs is treatment.

A buddy of mine was in an outpatient program where a few of the people there were there because of heroine.  There were some crazy stories out of those people.  What's worse is that a couple of them, though they claimed to be in "recovery", were still abusing the drug.  They couldn't stand the pain and horror of withdrawal.  In a way, it's a miracle that THEY weren't in jail, considering they sometimes showed up at the meetings all zooted out.

I hope this guy gets the help he needs and stays clean.
 
2013-11-22 01:31:28 PM

Baz744: According to the major religious traditions, we're supposed to feel compassion for everyone.


There's good reason I don't follow major religious traditions.
 
2013-11-22 02:41:25 PM

stpauler: YOU SHOULD SEE MY MERKIN


I don't get it.
 
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