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(PennLive)   Police chief under fire for profanity-laced, full auto-strewn Youtube videos is starting his own militia. Only $25 a month plus a clean urine sample and you're in. Must supply own camo   (pennlive.com) divider line 38
    More: Dumbass, Chief Kessler, YouTube, kessler, armed revolution, Glock pistols, CSF, boots on the ground  
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2178 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Nov 2013 at 1:07 PM (35 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



38 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-11-21 12:08:35 PM
With that $10,000 he's gonna be a millionaire!
 
2013-11-21 12:23:20 PM
The list for Boots on the Ground members is much longer. A sampling: fatigues in woodland digital camo, warm weather fatigues, cold wealthier fatigues, black combat boots, tactical vest, body armor (though ceramic plates will not be accepted), sneakers and solid gray sweats.

Doubt they'll have any problem meeting that requirement.
 
2013-11-21 12:24:45 PM
Does it have to be my urine, or will any old piss do?
 
2013-11-21 12:26:16 PM
...and a followup question.  What do you do with the urine when you're done with it?
 
2013-11-21 01:05:07 PM
Do you have to bring your own gasoline to the weekly cross burning?
 
2013-11-21 01:08:48 PM

PainInTheASP: ...and a followup question.  What do you do with the urine when you're done with it?


Why do you think they have canteens?
 
2013-11-21 01:09:28 PM
Let me guess.  Kessler?


There is one person who should not be handling firearms.  Clearly, his magazine doesn't go all the way to the shed.
 
2013-11-21 01:10:15 PM
I only drink unfiltered artisinal urine, so i'm ok with party being b.y.o.u.
 
2013-11-21 01:13:34 PM
This guy knows he's more than able to go enlist in the real military, right?
 
2013-11-21 01:19:32 PM

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: This guy knows he's more than able to go enlist in the real military, right?

and be a puppet to the Joos and coloreds that run the gubment?!?!?!!!!11
 
2013-11-21 01:19:39 PM
The "Boots on the Ground" members will have to apply, pass an interview, a background check, a physical and a drug screening -- and pay $25 a month

And after all that, you get to hand out with a complete dickhead.

What a deal.
 
2013-11-21 01:19:57 PM

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: This guy knows he's more than able to go enlist in the real military, right?


I assure you, one does not get to go on ones very own power trip upon enlistment.
 
2013-11-21 01:20:39 PM
Fark subscriptions are cheaper. And you can be naked. And drunk.
 
2013-11-21 01:21:47 PM
The first rule of Retard Club is you do not talk about Retard Club. The second rule of Retard Club is membership costs $25.
 
2013-11-21 01:23:21 PM
These guys probably have entire skids of ammo stockpiled. I wonder if I join and make friends with them, will they sell me ammo at reasonable prices? Because I'm not averse to being in a militia if it will support my range habit.
 
2013-11-21 01:24:00 PM
Should I bring my own weapons?
Has he done this before?
 
2013-11-21 01:27:40 PM

jso2897: Should I bring my own weapons?
Has he done this before?


Once.


/once.
 
2013-11-21 01:33:20 PM
I hope they don't draft me.
 
2013-11-21 01:36:18 PM
Calling him "chief" is really stretching it. It's a tiny town that sits along a creek in a valley, with a one-man police force where one of the admins let him wear a badge for a while.
 
2013-11-21 01:38:05 PM

fanbladesaresharp: Fark subscriptions are cheaper. And you can be naked. And drunk.


Even if I'm at work? OK. I'm in.
 
2013-11-21 01:38:42 PM
Pennsylvania. Lol.
 
2013-11-21 01:43:24 PM
If, WE ARE TRUE BELIVERS IN WHAT OUR FOUNDING FATHER CREATED!"

Then they should be in favor of revolution against the current US govenrment because they are currently running the same scam of a banking system as the Bank of England.  The US government has violated the most important tenet of a free sovereign nation, The ability to create currency as a public utility free from foreign debt.
 
2013-11-21 01:44:58 PM
Safety not guaranteed.  He's only done this once before.
 
2013-11-21 01:45:10 PM
Do you have to supply your own urine?
 
2013-11-21 01:53:16 PM
FTA "and be cleaned shaven"

I'm out!
 
2013-11-21 02:25:05 PM

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: This guy knows he's more than able to go enlist in the real military, right?


You know the real military doesn't enlist self appointed generals, right?
 
2013-11-21 02:38:14 PM

fanbladesaresharp: Fark subscriptions are cheaper. And you can be naked. And drunk.


I bet he and his buddies get drunk and naked together frequently.
 
2013-11-21 02:57:41 PM
Kessler couldn't be bothered to run his website through spell-check.

Ooh, look, gun rights advocates!

www.chiefkessler.com
 
2013-11-21 03:02:09 PM
I think I've seen this episode " Burn Notice".
 
2013-11-21 03:44:51 PM

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: Kessler couldn't be bothered to run his website through spell-check.

Ooh, look, gun rights advocates!

[www.chiefkessler.com image 595x480]


I just love those hardcore militia freedum fighters who are such giant farking pussies that they won't show their faces in their gun stroking group photos.
 
2013-11-21 03:51:26 PM

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: Kessler couldn't be bothered to run his website through spell-check.


It reads like it was written by a freshman in a community college remedial English class. My favorite is his listing of the ranks in his militia:

RANKS WILL CONSIST OF
Commander, Colonel, Captain, Lieutenant,  Sargent, Corporal, Private


Apparently "Sergeant" was too French or something
 
2013-11-21 04:12:01 PM

Ctrl-Alt-Del: Nina_Hartley's_Ass: Kessler couldn't be bothered to run his website through spell-check.

It reads like it was written by a freshman in a community college remedial English class. My favorite is his listing of the ranks in his militia:

RANKS WILL CONSIST OF
Commander, Colonel, Captain, Lieutenant,  Sargent, Corporal, Private

Apparently "Sergeant" was too French or something


I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt that he's not being anti-French. He just doesn't know how to spell it. Half expected "Colonel" to be "Kernal" or something.
 
2013-11-21 04:13:52 PM

Ctrl-Alt-Del: Nina_Hartley's_Ass: Kessler couldn't be bothered to run his website through spell-check.

Ooh, look, gun rights advocates!

[www.chiefkessler.com image 595x480]

I just love those hardcore militia freedum fighters who are such giant farking pussies that they won't show their faces in their gun stroking group photos.


When have members of resistance forces made their names and faces public record?
 
2013-11-21 04:39:32 PM
Is this like Man Camping?  Will my crystals get jacked?
 
2013-11-21 05:36:00 PM
How long until one of these nimrods Cheneys another one when they're playing G. I. Joe out in the woods?
 
2013-11-21 07:17:51 PM

BolshyGreatYarblocks: Is this like Man Camping?  Will my crystals get jacked?


No, but they might rustle your jimmies if you ask nicely.
 
2013-11-21 10:42:53 PM
"From the guidelines: "anyone who talks of over throwing THE GOVERNMENT OF THE UNITED STATED WILL BE BANNED AND REPORTED TO  APPROPRIATE AUTHORITIES, WE ARE NOT PART OF ANY INSURECTION MOVEMENT.
WE ARE NOT ANTI GOVERNMENT, WE ARE TRUE BELIVERS IN WHAT OUR FOUNDING FATHER CREATED!"

OTOH, the militia gets to define a "government of the United States" which is a different one from that everyone else believes in, who they can kick out any supporters of in their own ranks as violating this rule.
 
2013-11-22 09:37:55 AM

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: Kessler couldn't be bothered to run his website through spell-check.

Ooh, look, gun rights advocates!

[www.chiefkessler.com image 595x480]



So it's insecure men who never fit in anywhere playing war games in the woods. They already have the guns. I'd prefer they hang out with each other playing army in the woods than for them to be interacting with the population.
 
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