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(The New Republic)   Thanks to Bill Gates, the condom of the future will be made from beef tendon   (newrepublic.com) divider line 77
    More: Followup, materials science, fish markets, Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation  
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6017 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Nov 2013 at 1:26 PM (39 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



77 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-11-20 12:07:03 PM
Reinforcing the use of the hot beef injection jokes.......
 
2013-11-20 12:26:31 PM
That's fitting, because I've skewered my share of heifers back in the day.
 
2013-11-20 12:48:04 PM
"Other grantees are also exploring novel ways to don a condom."


I like the half-gainer with a twist method.
 
2013-11-20 01:02:11 PM
Not needing to use a condom almost makes being married worth it.

/almost
 
2013-11-20 01:25:14 PM
I predict men will change from shouting "OH GOD!" during orgasm to "HOLY COW!"

/You are now thinking of Harry Caray having sex.
 
2013-11-20 01:27:38 PM
Now, only vegetarians will be multiplying...
 
2013-11-20 01:27:39 PM
Dammit, I gotta get into these threads quicker if I want to make a good joke.

/yours were all better than mine, tho
 
2013-11-20 01:28:36 PM
What is a condom?
 
2013-11-20 01:28:58 PM

Eddie Adams from Torrance: Not needing to use a condom almost makes being married worth it.

/almost


You need to be married to raw dog it?
 
2013-11-20 01:30:06 PM
That was my stage name before the shrinking ray accident you bastard. I almost forgot.
 
2013-11-20 01:32:55 PM
Would you like some tube steak with your tube steak?
 
2013-11-20 01:35:16 PM

Eddie Adams from Torrance: Not needing to use a condom almost makes being married worth it.

/almost


And they say romance is dead.
 
2013-11-20 01:35:37 PM
Why not teach them abstinence?
 
2013-11-20 01:35:46 PM

queezyweezel: That's fitting, because I've skewered my share of heifers back in the day.


It's called 'live' stalking.
 
2013-11-20 01:35:56 PM
That's why they call me... Sir Loin
 
2013-11-20 01:36:37 PM
blogs.phoenixnewtimes.com
 
2013-11-20 01:38:54 PM
Soooooo    we will kill you... eat you... wear you...  and use your body parts to f*ck with?

 we really have some issues.
 
2013-11-20 01:40:30 PM
i1.ytimg.com
 
2013-11-20 01:41:36 PM
So now, when you have sex with a real cow, you can have sex with a real cow.
 
2013-11-20 01:42:01 PM

Surool: Now, only vegetarians will be multiplying...


And dying of AIDS.
 
2013-11-20 01:42:46 PM

duffblue: Eddie Adams from Torrance: Not needing to use a condom almost makes being married worth it.

/almost

You need to be married to raw dog it?


You fail at logically analyzing statements ...
 
2013-11-20 01:43:31 PM
Boy, that's one way to f with Hindus.
 
2013-11-20 01:43:49 PM

basemetal: Reinforcing the use of the hot beef injection jokes.......


Bet she won't foget about you....

No, no, no, nooooo
 
2013-11-20 01:44:22 PM

MassAsster: Soooooo    we will kill you... eat you... wear you...  and use your body parts to f*ck with?

 we really have some issues.


Nose to tail, man. The way to respect the animal is to use all of its parts!

/Now if they made them out of cow penises that would be even cooler
 
2013-11-20 01:44:39 PM
When I have sex, I do it low and slow......I hear that's not a good method for collagen.


Didn't they already try the animal collagen condom with lamb skin? Weren't they porous?
 
2013-11-20 01:45:00 PM

MassAsster: Soooooo    we will kill you... eat you... wear you...  and use your body parts to f*ck with?

 we really have some issues.


...and ride you for sport
...and siphon your baby food
...and push you over while you sleep

Don't f*ck with humans, apparently. Some prehistoric bovine must've really talked some smack.
 
2013-11-20 01:45:10 PM
And suddenly a bunch of guys will suddenly be allergic to beef tendon.
 
2013-11-20 01:46:26 PM
I can't wait to plow the wife with one of those and make jokes about the burger smell.

HER HOME OF THE WHOPPER!
 
2013-11-20 01:47:52 PM
Read this as beef tenderloin

tender loin

loin
 
2013-11-20 01:48:22 PM
I'm a fan of nitrile rubber gloves. The Ansell TNT Blue, not the cheap no-names. How does that stack up for a condom material?

The fact I just differentiated a material by brand might indicate it's not the best material to compete with what they're contemplating. Except I know a synthetic material will be cheaper than beef tendons, unless someone is planning on growing that material in a vat.
 
2013-11-20 01:49:41 PM
Dr. Papa Sow, great doctor bad rapper.
 
2013-11-20 01:49:56 PM
"Where's the beef", is going to be making a comeback.

/ Everything old IS new again.
 
2013-11-20 01:51:39 PM

myrrh: duffblue: Eddie Adams from Torrance: Not needing to use a condom almost makes being married worth it.

/almost

You need to be married to raw dog it?

You fail at logically analyzing statements ...


but at least he got to be all edgy and use "raw dog" in a sentence
 
2013-11-20 01:52:06 PM
Latex, which is derived from natural rubber, has been the industry standard since Youngs Rubber Company, the first makers of Trojan condoms, rolled them out in 1920

hehehe
 
2013-11-20 01:57:58 PM

BKITU: I predict men will change from shouting "OH GOD!" during orgasm to "HOLY COW!"

/You are now thinking of Harry Caray having sex.


Or Phil Rizzuto.
 
2013-11-20 01:59:43 PM
I wonder how they test the feeling?

Do they have real or simulated Vaginas?

I am thinking a bunch of guys lined up with Fleshlights.

Does Kwames wife work there?

img.fark.net
 
2013-11-20 02:01:01 PM
spiderpaz:

Latex, which is derived from natural rubber, has been the industry standard since Youngs Rubber Company, the first makers of Trojan condoms, rolled them out in 1920

hehehe


Yeah, caught that too.

I'm sure this will go well in central Asia where it might be needed most. They already failed at the get-go there, they should have been putting the word "buf" or bullock in the marketing. In my limited experience, Hindus have no problem with eating the hell out of those, but when you say the word "beef" they start to ask questions.
 
2013-11-20 02:01:10 PM
encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
Ceiling cow is watching you eat beef cowndoms.
 
2013-11-20 02:01:53 PM
I wonder if a long hardcore session involving one of these things would start to smell like a pot roast cooking in a crock pot?
 
2013-11-20 02:03:23 PM
So it's going to be useless in controlling birth rates in India?
 
2013-11-20 02:03:25 PM

RoyHobbs22: I wonder if a long hardcore session involving one of these things would start to smell like a pot roast cooking in a crock   crack pot?


FTFY
 
2013-11-20 02:07:10 PM
I've had some delicious beef tendon. If this means more BJs, I'm in.
 
2013-11-20 02:08:08 PM
RoyHobbs22:

I wonder if a long hardcore session involving one of these things would start to smell like a pot roast cooking in a crock pot?


So, gigantic upside to this for the guys? Is this something the girls should make note of?

/ as an unrelated aside, I have never failed to get female loving when I took a girl home to home-made bread. Go figure.
 
2013-11-20 02:11:57 PM
Next step is 3D printing them.
 
2013-11-20 02:14:44 PM

RoyHobbs22: I wonder if a long hardcore session involving one of these things would start to smell like a pot roast cooking in a crock pot?


is ok with this:

www.seriouseats.com
 
2013-11-20 02:17:53 PM
The next "1857-style" revolution will be started by beef condoms. Mark my words.
 
2013-11-20 02:20:38 PM
When you tell a lady you have bill gates' beef condoms back home and she turns you down, is the hurt so bad you get blue balls of death?

/cause that sounds unpleasant.
 
2013-11-20 02:21:43 PM
This may result in a shortage of Big Macs.
 
2013-11-20 02:22:10 PM

dj_spanmaster: I've had some delicious beef tendon. If this means more BJs, I'm in.


Until she starts chewing on the damn thing.

CSB.  A buddy of mine brought some girl home one night from the bar, she wasn't 'that type of girl', so she just blew him.  (i know, if you're gonna go that far, just fark already).  He tells me it's the worse beej in his life,  I tell him, c'mon, even the worse beej blowy isn't 'that' bad.  He goes, no, she was farking chewing on it, the next day I could hardly walk.  LOL, he's such a nice guy he didn't even tell her to stop, because he didn't want to hurt her feelings, and after a while said he was too drunk to finish.
 
2013-11-20 02:25:23 PM
Bill Gates's grant was to find a way to get women to swallow.

These won't have to get stuck in the sewer system if she eats the cum filled condom!
 
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