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(BBC)   Modern parents less likely to be eaten by bears   (bbc.co.uk) divider line 22
    More: Obvious, British Heart Foundation, school sports, American Heart Association  
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2996 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Nov 2013 at 7:08 AM (21 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



22 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-11-20 07:13:29 AM
Does it count as a repeat if the same story is over in the Geek tab?
 
2013-11-20 07:16:09 AM
Modern parents less likely to be eaten by bears

With more and more states approving gay marriage, that's likely to change.
 
2013-11-20 07:16:23 AM
Yeah, but look at how much more fat they can move the same distance in similar, yet slightly smaller time.  It equates to more power output while running.  your children are more powerful, than you were!

Thank you the Burger King!
 
2013-11-20 07:27:55 AM
"THEY WERE MORE THAN BEAR CALORIES! THEY WERE MY PARENTS!

...

HELP ME THROW THIS COUCH OUT THE WINDOW!"
 
2013-11-20 07:28:37 AM
That's in the UK, in the US, well, maybe our bears are getting fatter too?

\Can't run
\\ Bad back, not THAT fat....
\\\ 6'3" 205
 
2013-11-20 07:29:49 AM
Oh yeah, bear tag holder as well...

Maybe I should start trying to JOG at least.
 
2013-11-20 07:33:00 AM
simpsonswiki.com

Well, my grandparents didn't have massive government oversight protecting them. Too bad because all of my grandparents were eaten by bears three years before my parents were born. At least that's the excuse my father gave me for why we didn't go to family reunions.
 
2013-11-20 07:41:50 AM
Unless the mrs. is menstruating, I hear that attracts the bears.
 
GBB
2013-11-20 08:16:36 AM

GlobalThunder: Unless the mrs. is menstruating, I hear that attracts the bears.


I honestly expected that to be the story when I clicked.
 
2013-11-20 08:18:00 AM
I believe the sole reason for this is that Zips brand shoes have gone extinct.
 
2013-11-20 08:28:03 AM
You're not supposed to run from a bear.
 
2013-11-20 08:45:24 AM

dittybopper: Modern parents less likely to be eaten by bears

With more and more states approving gay marriage, that's likely to change.


Came here for this, tyvm!
 
2013-11-20 08:57:21 AM
And dragons
 
2013-11-20 09:16:20 AM

Carn: And dragons


And Zombies.

/Rule #1: Cardio.
 
2013-11-20 09:25:30 AM
It's hard to run fast when you're morbidly obese and the most physical activity you get in a day is spending 5 minutes looking for the remote.
 
2013-11-20 10:10:16 AM

mod3072: It's hard to run fast when you're morbidly obese and the most physical activity you get in a day is spending 5 minutes looking for the remote.


Oh now come on, masturbating is way more vigorous than looking for the remote.
 
jvl
2013-11-20 11:16:37 AM
My first green after dozens of attempts? Yay!
 
das
2013-11-20 11:30:36 AM

George Babbitt: You're not supposed to run from a bear.


I will if I'm faster than the guy with me!!!!
 
2013-11-20 01:31:26 PM
Simple solution, chase kids with a bear.
 
2013-11-20 05:00:24 PM
I read this as "modem parents", thought maybe it was the opposite of helicopter parents.
 
2013-11-20 05:32:12 PM
cdn.lipstiq.com
What modern parents might look like.
 
2013-11-20 08:04:31 PM
Modern bears know how to compensate
laist.com
 
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