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(Fox News)   New poll shows that if the previous presidential elections could have waited until today, President Romney would win   ( divider line
    More: Obvious, humans, Andrew McCarthy, First Lady Michelle Obama, permanent campaign, Common Core, American Bridge, Alison Lundergan Grimes, Dana Milbank  
•       •       •

670 clicks; posted to Politics » on 19 Nov 2013 at 2:53 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

jbc [TotalFark]
2013-11-19 01:21:03 PM  
5 votes:
In other news, Fox Noise still doesn't know how the Electoral College works.
2013-11-19 01:47:09 PM  
4 votes:
How would the 2010 midterms look today?
2013-11-19 03:18:00 PM  
2 votes:
New poll shows that if the previous presidential elections could have waited until today, President Romney would win


Also, stop submitting Fox News links. They were butthurt enough last November when their favored winner got told by the American people. Like the Phelps's, they thrive on your attention and crave relevance.

They want you to believe that they are the norm, and not an embarrassingly selfish and superficial aspect of our society.
2013-11-19 03:07:58 PM  
2 votes:
That's because enough time has passed for people to start thinking of Romney as "Generic Republican" again.

Once he opens his big mouth and starts saying what he thinks about you people his numbers would plunge again. He just isn't a good candidate.
2013-11-19 01:45:44 PM  
2 votes:
Only if Romney had been suddenly stricken mute in 2012.
2013-11-19 01:31:57 PM  
2 votes:
in other news, john kerry beat george w. bush in the election of 2006.
2013-11-19 09:06:31 PM  
1 vote:

whidbey: Aura226: And then we would have Romneycare Instead of Romneycare.

It's cute that you think ACA is the same thing. Shouldn't you be complaining about the Website and how it's Obama's 19th Katrina?

Yes. I do think ACA is like Romneycare, My source is liberal Nobel prize economist Paul Krugman. And no I'm not going use the 19th Katrina Argument because I'm not a farking conservative.
2013-11-19 08:12:49 PM  
1 vote:
This if cours assumes Romney polls would be any better. By this point he would likely be shooting bums to show how he is all bootstraps and called 99% of Americans as c@&c suckers who should die of AIDS.
2013-11-19 07:48:32 PM  
1 vote:
Obama stopped campaigning for President, and his poll numbers went down.

Romney stopped campaigning for President and his poll numbers went up.

I think there's a lesson in there somewhere.
2013-11-19 07:10:59 PM  
1 vote:
He LOST get OVER it!
2013-11-19 04:27:00 PM  
1 vote:
The house is quiet, and the Romney kids can see the pain coming.  Last year's Thanksgiving was a bust, full of Boston Market and emotional breakdowns.  Ever since then, they've been avoiding their parents' house as Mitt slowly went mad with grief.  The last time they saw him in March, he was wearing a bad approximation of a Patton helmet made of crusty mucus and nothing else.  Now, when they went over to the house, the kids stayed in the car.

The maid sat on the couch, chain smoking, getting paid whether she busted her ass or didn't.  Heaps of uneaten Boston Market dinners were stacked everywhere in different states of decay.  A pair of slacks was stuck to the dining room ceiling.  The doghouse outside had the skeleton of a dog along with a hastily made 'Secretary of Defense' sign that was hopefully written in very sticky peanut-laden mud.

Climbing the stairs, the Romney children realized that there was serious water damage.  The stairs creaked and crumpled, the Asian wood and drywall coming apart at the seams.  They found Mitt in the master bedroom.  His suit was cringled, as if someone had spread a thin varnish of gravy upon it in lieu of bathing.  His snot helmet hung by the closet -- along with a hastily made 'Ovel Orifice' sign in the same manner of the doghouse's -- as Mitt laughed and laughed.  "Look!"  He pointed at the sideways TV.  "If they held the election now, I would the president.  I WOULD RULE.  ME!  JUST LIKE DADDY!  JUST.  LIKE.  DADDY!!"

He grabs a daughter and shakes her so hard that a crown flies out of her mouth.  Mitt dives to the carpet and grabs it.  "Quickly."  He looks to his kids as they stare wild-eyed between the affected daughter and their father.  "I need more of these.  They fuel my time machine.  If I can go back, we can do this!"  He opens his mouth and points at the bloody claw hammer next to some molars on the work table...which is, in reality, the back of an overflowing toilet.  "Now, this might hurt, but I figure the time paradox will restore us all once we regain the White House.  DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?  WE HAVE TO REGAIN THE WHITE HOUSE!  I have written the notes on our ascent right here!"  And he dives headfirst into the brown water of the toilet, bubbling and gurgling for minutes, knocking his teeth off the back of the toilet and masking the sounds of the children running down the stairs, out the door, and into their leased SUVs.

The maid smirks as the tire smoke from the departing children clear.  She lights another cigarette.  If only they stayed fifteen minutes more, they could see the encore of The Passion of the Christ with Mitt's trousersnake with the nail gun as Pontius Pilate.
2013-11-19 04:06:25 PM  
1 vote:
If the 2012 election had happened again 2 days after the first one, Mitt would have still lost.  If the 2012 election had happened in 1960, Mitt wouldn't have been old enough to be on the ticket.  If it had happened in 1760, people would have been confused because we ddin't vote for Presidents then.  If it had happened during the Cretaceous Period, a small shrew-like mammal would have won because they were much more appealing than Mitt.  If it happens again in 3012, Mitt-bot might have a chance, but I'd vote for Fry.

Stupid "what if..." is really really stupid.
2013-11-19 03:40:01 PM  
1 vote:
New poll shows that if Romney wasn't an unlikeable, arrogant asshole with ever-shifting policies and disdain for middle-class America, he would have won.
2013-11-19 03:33:16 PM  
1 vote:
That is a serious cry for help right there.
2013-11-19 03:23:03 PM  
1 vote:

Why?  In this hypothetical scenario, Romney would have kept campaigning and thus kept reminding people what a horrible choice he was.

2013-11-19 03:22:51 PM  
1 vote:
And John Kerry would have slaughtered George W Bush had they held the election a month after the Valerie Plame scandal... or really anytime from 2006 on. And if my aunt had a dick she'd be my uncle.
2013-11-19 03:10:40 PM  
1 vote:
And if frogs had wings they wouldn't bump their little asses when they hop

/stop your incessant whining
2013-11-19 03:08:27 PM  
1 vote:
And if Scott Norwood kicked the ball today, the Bills would have won the Superbowl.
2013-11-19 03:07:31 PM  
1 vote:
theblaze.comView Full Size
2013-11-19 03:06:00 PM  
1 vote:
Wow, the butthurt is strong on Fox today... wonder what shiatty thing the GOP just did that they are trying to distract from?

Or is this just the regular stirring up of the base?
2013-11-19 02:58:49 PM  
1 vote:
You lost. Get over it.
2013-11-19 02:57:49 PM  
1 vote:

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Lando Lincoln: Imagine if we had to endure not one year but TWO YEARS of campaigning. Mother of God.

You mean we didn't? I could have sworn the 2012 campaign began in 2010.

I'm pretty sure the 2016 campaign has been going since sometime in 2011.
2013-11-19 02:18:24 PM  
1 vote:

Lando Lincoln: Imagine if we had to endure not one year but TWO YEARS of campaigning. Mother of God.

You mean we didn't? I could have sworn the 2012 campaign began in 2010.
2013-11-19 02:08:58 PM  
1 vote:
You know, if the election was held now, candidate Romney would have yet another year of income tax returns that he would refuse to release.
2013-11-19 01:49:31 PM  
1 vote:
And the honest truth:  My life wouldn't be different in any meaningful way.  Just throwing that out there.  Romney wouldn't have been a disaster to this country, and on the same note Obama hasn't been either.  In other words, meh.
2013-11-19 01:36:07 PM  
1 vote:
Why just limit it to the 2012 election? Let's just go back and revisit EVERY presidential election? Forget recent history. What about Martin Van Buren? Or Fatty Taft? Huh?! John Tyler? Millard "The Duck" Fillmore? And Harding? James Buchanan? We could do this forever!
2013-11-19 01:33:02 PM  
1 vote:
And if my aunt grew balls, she'd be my uncle.
2013-11-19 01:26:45 PM  
1 vote:
Ohhhh man. I wish I could go back in time. I'd take State!
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