Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(All Africa)   Why SA's Occult-Related Crime Unit, founded by Kobus "Donker" Jonker in 1992 and limited to Christian officers only, is stupid. "We don't have a jealousy-related crimes unit, or a greed-related, tender-related, BEE-related, or alien-related unit"   (allafrica.com) divider line 28
    More: Weird, ORCU, South African, bees, police officers, greed, Internet Archive, morality  
•       •       •

2224 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Nov 2013 at 9:12 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



28 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2013-11-19 09:02:02 AM  
How I picture an Occult-Related Crime Unit.

4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-11-19 09:15:46 AM  
You know it's really something when you think SA stands for SomethingAwful and the headline still seems to make sense.
 
2013-11-19 09:16:12 AM  
I want to believe.
 
2013-11-19 09:17:33 AM  
Lest we go condemning South Africans for being barbaric, "experts on the occult" who are neither experts on anything nor learned in occult matters have been responsible for Americans being jailed as well.
 
2013-11-19 09:18:19 AM  
What a donk may look like
 www.wearysloth.com

On another note, GIS for just "donk" was educational.
 
2013-11-19 09:20:12 AM  
You want an Occult-Related Crime? The payroll for these idiots for the last 21 years.
 
2013-11-19 09:20:37 AM  

Weatherkiss: You know it's really something when you think SA stands for SomethingAwful and the headline still seems to make sense.




Seeing the SA in the headline I assumed Texas.
 
2013-11-19 09:22:10 AM  

Mid_mo_mad_man: Weatherkiss: You know it's really something when you think SA stands for SomethingAwful and the headline still seems to make sense.

Seeing the SA in the headline I assumed Texas.


... and it still makes sense if that was the case too.
 
2013-11-19 09:23:47 AM  

Mid_mo_mad_man: Weatherkiss: You know it's really something when you think SA stands for SomethingAwful and the headline still seems to make sense.

Seeing the SA in the headline I assumed Texas.


San Andreas?

static.gamesradar.com
 
2013-11-19 09:27:14 AM  
Donker means dark in afrikaans...for those who want to know
and Dude... let it go.
 
2013-11-19 09:27:53 AM  
You laugh subby but the next time teens are summoning the dead or standing on your lawn you'll wish your city had an Occult unit.
 
2013-11-19 09:28:44 AM  

DubtodaIll: What a donk may look like
 [www.wearysloth.com image 320x240]

On another note, GIS for just "donk" was educational.


Hmm, I was expecting something more NSFW, or at least a wider variety of images.  Apparently donk is a specific well defined term.
 
2013-11-19 09:29:07 AM  

Weatherkiss: You know it's really something when you think SA stands for SomethingAwful and the headline still seems to make sense.



If it was an article about a convicted pedophile being a moderator then yeah.
/It was Aatrek and it took one google search to find it out.
 
2013-11-19 09:38:00 AM  
I assumed the headline was talking about San Antonio, with all the teenage werewolf murders it would make sense.
 
2013-11-19 09:58:29 AM  
I thought the article would be about a unit specialized in dealing with ritual murders and witch doctors and things like that. Because those things happen in that region.
 
2013-11-19 10:08:27 AM  

batlock666: I thought the article would be about a unit specialized in dealing with ritual murders and witch doctors and things like that. Because those things happen in that region.


How else do you expect people to cure HIV?
 
2013-11-19 10:57:46 AM  
I like the part where parting your hair to the left could be evidence that you are in a cult. I KNEW by my brother was weird. I'm tellin' Mom.
 
2013-11-19 11:01:40 AM  

batlock666: I thought the article would be about a unit specialized in dealing with ritual murders and witch doctors and things like that. Because those things happen in that region.


That is probably the reason for its existence. However the article gives the impression that it has entirely been re-purposed to combat satanism among white teenagers which may just be a sub-task promoted by some religious nutters there, though some (many?) working there may regard all paganism/witchcraft as satanism.

Here is an interview by a "witch" of one of their officers:

http://www.penton.co.za/an-interview-with-an-occult-crime-unit-detec ti ve/
We then went into the topic of muti murders, which are unfortunately common in Africa and South Africa. I personally have been involved in looking for some missing children who have been found murdered, with genitals and eyes removed.  Yes, this is the work of a traditional healer, however not ALL traditional healers work in this way. Many traditional healers that I personally know only work with the indigenous plants, roots and leaves of the natural medicine that nature has provided us.

Therefore, let us rather look at the crime/s
* Child Abductions.
* Child Murders.
* Body Mutilation.
* Illegal trading in body parts.

By all means, investigate the crime, but please don't blame it on Witchcraft or the Occult.


Muti witchcraft beliefs are to blame. South Africa probably does need specialists in muti murders and similar criminal witchcraft, but not from a religious perspective.
 
2013-11-19 11:03:11 AM  
 
2013-11-19 11:07:11 AM  
FTA: The crime in question is against common sense and morality, and is vested in the reinforcing of a Christian evangelical "Satanic Panic".

There we go - the next album name from Steel Panther
 
2013-11-19 11:09:30 AM  
HairBolus

Muti witchcraft beliefs are to blame.

That's like saying belief in allotransplantation is responsible for organ trafficking. Kinda, but missing the point.
 
2013-11-19 11:40:28 AM  

Mid_mo_mad_man: Weatherkiss: You know it's really something when you think SA stands for SomethingAwful and the headline still seems to make sense.

Seeing the SA in the headline I assumed Texas.


Yeah, I did too. And I was thinking gee that year seems odd, because this nonsense in the US peaked in the 80s. *sigh*

/I think there's still people in jail for 'satanic abuse' crimes
 
2013-11-19 12:04:31 PM  
K.-Donker-Jonk?
 
2013-11-19 12:54:46 PM  
I actually can see some need for something like an occult crimes unit. When people commit crimes for reasons they see as occult, they tend to fall into patterns. Those patterns are invariably complex: the term occult itself means "that which is hidden," and so if just anyone could recognize the patterns, they wouldn't be occult. But the patterns still exist, and can still be recognized by someone else who knows the subject matter. The ability to recognize them would obviously be useful to law enforcement, but there's a catch: as the term suggest, experts on the occult are rather more difficult to find than experts on most other subjects. Seen in that light, a unit that could be consulted on these matters would be useful.

This said, I doubt that most modern "occult crimes units" are actually used this way. Maybe not any of them. These folks in particular seem to fancy themselves some kind of latter-day witch hunters.
 
2013-11-19 01:11:49 PM  

Millennium: I actually can see some need for something like an occult crimes unit.


For all those people turned into newts? It's a big problem Lou.
 
2013-11-19 01:53:08 PM  

Lady Indica: Millennium: I actually can see some need for something like an occult crimes unit.

For all those people turned into newts? It's a big problem Lou.


They got better.

I'm talking less about individual crimes and more about perpetrators: identifying and tracking people who are doing these things for occult motives. They do pop up from time to time.
 
2013-11-19 04:04:26 PM  

Millennium: Lady Indica: Millennium: I actually can see some need for something like an occult crimes unit.

For all those people turned into newts? It's a big problem Lou.

They got better.

I'm talking less about individual crimes and more about perpetrators: identifying and tracking people who are doing these things for occult motives. They do pop up from time to time.


In africa? It's a constant thing. Superstition abounds.

Not that the govt should play into it tho.
 
2013-11-19 05:54:05 PM  

Weatherkiss: You know it's really something when you think SA stands for SomethingAwful and the headline still seems to make sense.


I figured through context it was Saudi Arabia, but then I noticed the name of the founder didn't fit with that.
 
Displayed 28 of 28 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report