If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Reuters)   The Pentagon's accounting system is baloney marinated in hogwash, then thoroughly cooked   (reuters.com) divider line 50
    More: Obvious, United States Deputy Secretary of Defense, countries by number of troops, file systems, Secretary of Defense Robert Gates, Sarbanes-Oxley, accounting scandals, accounting practice, special reports  
•       •       •

4525 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Nov 2013 at 1:09 PM (21 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



50 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-11-18 01:12:42 PM
"You don't REALLY think they spent twenty-thousand on a hammer...thirty-thousand on a toilet seat, do ya?"
 
2013-11-18 01:13:29 PM
Two trillion went where?
 
2013-11-18 01:13:31 PM
Well, of course it is - there is plenty of waste in the DoD budget to be removed. Numerous redundant operational programs, billions in unwanted acquisitions from large defense contractor campaign donors, and a focus on building overseas infrastructure that we'll never use.

So naturally, the Pentagon wants to go after troop pay and benefits.  http://www.military.com/daily-news/2013/11/05/hagel-says-cuts-to-pay- a nd-benefits-are-needed.html
 
2013-11-18 01:13:49 PM

Sin_City_Superhero: "You don't REALLY think they spent twenty-thousand on a hammer...thirty-thousand on a toilet seat, do ya?"


Done in one.
 
2013-11-18 01:14:04 PM

baloney marinated in hogwash, then thoroughly cooked


So if the hogs are washed, that means the government pork would be clean.That should make everyone happy.
 
2013-11-18 01:14:29 PM
Is regular baloney not marinated in hogwash?
 
2013-11-18 01:15:54 PM

Englebert Slaptyback: baloney marinated in hogwash, then thoroughly cooked


So if the hogs are washed, that means the government pork would be clean.That should make everyone happy.


All these ham-fisted puns are a poor-sign of things to come.
 
2013-11-18 01:16:37 PM
Duh
 
2013-11-18 01:16:46 PM
As a former contractor to DFAS (Defense Finance and Accounting Service) I've gotta say:  "You don't know the half of it, sister."
 
2013-11-18 01:17:06 PM

Sin_City_Superhero: "You don't REALLY think they spent twenty-thousand on a hammer...thirty-thousand on a toilet seat, do ya?"


Is there nothing this movie that can't be quoted today?
 
2013-11-18 01:17:24 PM

UrukHaiGuyz: Englebert Slaptyback: baloney marinated in hogwash, then thoroughly cooked


So if the hogs are washed, that means the government pork would be clean.That should make everyone happy.

All these ham-fisted puns are a poor-sign of things to come.


Nice.  Subtle.
 
2013-11-18 01:19:04 PM
The Secret Space Program won't fund itself.
 
2013-11-18 01:20:03 PM

clkeagle: Well, of course it is - there is plenty of waste in the DoD budget to be removed. Numerous redundant operational programs, billions in unwanted acquisitions from large defense contractor campaign donors, and a focus on building overseas infrastructure that we'll never use.

So naturally, the Pentagon wants to go after troop pay and benefits.  http://www.military.com/daily-news/2013/11/05/hagel-says-cuts-to-pay- a nd-benefits-are-needed.html


if you read TFA it's because they actually have some idea what they pay for those things...they have no clue how much they spend on procurement or what they get for it::


In its investigation, Reuters has found that the Pentagon is largely incapable of keeping track of its vast stores of weapons, ammunition and other supplies; thus it continues to spend money on new supplies it doesn't need and on storing others long out of date. It has amassed a backlog of more than half a trillion dollars in unaudited contracts with outside vendors; how much of that money paid for actual goods and services delivered isn't known. And it repeatedly falls prey to fraud and theft that can go undiscovered for years, often eventually detected by external law enforcement agencies.
The consequences aren't only financial; bad bookkeeping can affect the nation's defense. In one example of many, the Army lost track of $5.8 billion of supplies between 2003 and 2011 as it shuffled equipment between reserve and regular units. Affected units "may experience equipment shortages that could hinder their ability to train soldiers and respond to emergencies,"


And keep in mind, that tactics and Strategy are all fine and good, but largely irrelevant to the success of real wars, the key factor, as it has been since Scipio whooped  Hannibal, has been logistics.    If there is one thing I would expect the armed forced to be the best in the world at, its tracking materials and supplies,  they have a whole division of each service that has no other job than keeping track of this shiat.
 
2013-11-18 01:22:13 PM

clkeagle: Well, of course it is - there is plenty of waste in the DoD budget to be removed. Numerous redundant operational programs, billions in unwanted acquisitions from large defense contractor campaign donors, and a focus on building overseas infrastructure that we'll never use.

So naturally, the Pentagon wants to go after troop pay and benefits.  http://www.military.com/daily-news/2013/11/05/hagel-says-cuts-to-pay- a nd-benefits-are-needed.html


I read that this morning and thought how farking stupid that was. Yeah cut the pay and benefits for people that have been shiat on the last 10 years and make sure nobody else wants to sign up.
 
2013-11-18 01:22:33 PM
How do you think the CIA hides their flying carrier?

mimg.ugo.com
 
2013-11-18 01:23:20 PM

Sin_City_Superhero: "You don't REALLY think they spent twenty-thousand on a hammer...thirty-thousand on a toilet seat, do ya?"


Sadly they actually do.  The theory that it's all funneled to black ops?   doesn't work because there is a completely separate, incredibly gigantic, secret "black budget" for those things Congress also passes.

as the Onion observed:

Smart, Qualified People Behind The Scenes Keeping America Safe: 'We Don't Exist'
 
2013-11-18 01:25:40 PM

groppet: clkeagle: Well, of course it is - there is plenty of waste in the DoD budget to be removed. Numerous redundant operational programs, billions in unwanted acquisitions from large defense contractor campaign donors, and a focus on building overseas infrastructure that we'll never use.

So naturally, the Pentagon wants to go after troop pay and benefits.  http://www.military.com/daily-news/2013/11/05/hagel-says-cuts-to-pay- a nd-benefits-are-needed.html

I read that this morning and thought how farking stupid that was. Yeah cut the pay and benefits for people that have been shiat on the last 10 years and make sure nobody else wants to sign up.


Well, this can work out.  The only ones that stay are the ones that REALLY want to be soldiers.  No need to come up with staff cuts if the staff takes themselves out.
 
2013-11-18 01:29:48 PM
Subby's mom enjoys the marinated baloney.
 
2013-11-18 01:31:49 PM
....so I'm getting a kick....
 
2013-11-18 01:33:27 PM

Magorn: Sin_City_Superhero: "You don't REALLY think they spent twenty-thousand on a hammer...thirty-thousand on a toilet seat, do ya?"

Sadly they actually do.  The theory that it's all funneled to black ops?   doesn't work because there is a completely separate, incredibly gigantic, secret "black budget" for those things Congress also passes.

as the Onion observed:

Smart, Qualified People Behind The Scenes Keeping America Safe: 'We Don't Exist'


Hah! Magorn is Larry Summers.
 
2013-11-18 01:35:09 PM
Sounds like the lunch special at Stuckey's
 
2013-11-18 01:37:00 PM
Trillion here, trillion there...and pretty soon you're talking about real money.
 
2013-11-18 01:39:02 PM
Sounds like they are still missing the 2.3 Trillion dollars from 9/10/01.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IVpSBUgbxBU
 
2013-11-18 01:40:50 PM
There is no business in this universe that could survive without have a good balanced spreadsheet of expenses vs. debits.  Unless of course that business has such a variable yet unlimited income that there is no point in tracking it.

This is how/why the gov't spending has gotten so far out of control.  This is how the gov't can wrack up multiple trillions in debt, but still find billions per day to fund things like wars that are doing the country no good whatsoever.

Does anyone else find it hipocritical as hell that the IRS will come and audit YOU if it doesn't appear that your finances are in line, but has absolutely no interest at all in auditing the gov't itself?!  It should be as simple as going to each department and saying, "how much do you spend?  What is your income?"  I know it would be 10,000's of lines in a spreadheet.  But just once, it would make sense to actually get all of that together.
 
2013-11-18 01:41:47 PM
How disgusting.
 
2013-11-18 01:42:28 PM
Well that's odd the Web site is down
 
2013-11-18 01:43:54 PM
img.fark.net
 
2013-11-18 01:48:27 PM
Thank goodness Wall Street doesn't engage in any accounting shenanigans.
 
2013-11-18 02:05:26 PM
You mean it's not the poor with refrigerators and air conditioners that are pissing away my hard earned taxes ?
 
2013-11-18 02:13:39 PM
Well now that the problem has been identified, I'm sure that the responsible parties will be indicted, and that everything will be rectified.

And that Santa Claus will marry the Easter Bunny in a gay marriage.
 
2013-11-18 02:17:46 PM

durbnpoisn: Does anyone else find it hipocritical as hell that the IRS will come and audit YOU if it doesn't appear that your finances are in line, but has absolutely no interest at all in auditing the gov't itself?!


That's the job of the GAO, not the IRS.  In fact, the GAO audits the IRS.
 
2013-11-18 02:46:45 PM

UrukHaiGuyz: Englebert Slaptyback: baloney marinated in hogwash, then thoroughly cooked


So if the hogs are washed, that means the government pork would be clean.That should make everyone happy.

All these ham-fisted puns are a poor-sign of things to come.


swine of the times
 
2013-11-18 02:52:09 PM
Many years ago I was involved in the budgetary process for the division of our agency I was working in at the time.  I lack the 5,000 pages needed to summarize the complete and utter bullshiat involved in this process.

/i don't do that any more, i just fill out the millions of forms necessary for the months-long process to procure free software
 
2013-11-18 03:00:49 PM
"Keeping all those useless bullets, explosives, missiles, rifles, rocket launchers and other munitions costs tens of millions of dollars a year."

They ever hear of a yard sale?
 
2013-11-18 03:33:53 PM
I heard the DoD office in Columbus is actively hiring fraud examiners.  This explains a lot.  The salary I was quoted isn't enough for something this farked.
 
2013-11-18 03:36:15 PM
So it's basically the same as every other accounting system the government has?
 
2013-11-18 03:37:53 PM

bighairyguy: Thank goodness Wall Street doesn't engage in any accounting shenanigans.


Numbers are only as good as the audits performed on them.  The auditing performed on banks is demonstrably flawed (as the last recession proved), but sadly the audits performed on government agencies are far worse.
 
2013-11-18 03:58:30 PM
As soon as the writer mentioned that $600 toilet seat I stopped reading. That to me indicates that the writer does / did not do his homework. That $600 toilet seat was for a very short run for seat and base that has to fit in a aircraft and must conform to Milspec and FAA regulations.
Go to a boat repair shop and ask to have them build you a fireproof fiberglass 4 foot counter top with a sink hole for your kitchen, then ask what it would cost.
 
2013-11-18 04:14:22 PM
It all comes down to saying "No" to somebody really important who has a lot of fancy medals an shiatty paperwork.

Local and State governments do it all the time to police and fire chiefs and they get red in the face and say "I need it to save lives!" but the answer is still No.

When you tell them No until they get the paperwork and finances right, then they take it seriously and task their subordinates to get it right the first time and demote those who don't.

Unfortunately the DOD just never hears the word "NO" nearly enough, especially when it comes to money, so they are neglectfully incapable of accounting for it.
 
2013-11-18 04:34:28 PM

SomeAmerican: bighairyguy: Thank goodness Wall Street doesn't engage in any accounting shenanigans.

Numbers are only as good as the audits performed on them.  The auditing performed on banks is demonstrably flawed (as the last recession proved), but sadly the audits performed on government agencies are far worse.


I used to work at a State University and they got written up two years in a row for not having the University's checkbook balanced.  Accounting 101 super fail.  I was asked to help them set up a process for this.  Me, the guy with an engineering degree.  The accountant basically said it was to complicated to automate and they didn't have time to manually match everything.  One I dug into what they were provided with, I could see their dilema because the two data feeds they had to reconcile were very incompatible.  I dumped it all into Excel and and ground through 27 months of statements.  When I was done, they were off by $1.62.  I offered to give them the money so it would balance, but they weren't allowed to do that.  I set up a way to translate the two feeds into compatibility that would resolve up to 98% of the line items each month so the task would be manageable.  Of course they didn't bother to use it.  I left a few months later.

A few years later, an analyst dug what looked like embezzlement to the tune about $250,000.  The analyst was fired for embarrasing the University.  The State got involved and dug deeper to find the rest of the now million dollar iceberg.  Lawsuits and criminal trials galore.  Glad I left when I did.
 
2013-11-18 04:40:51 PM

Magorn: clkeagle: Well, of course it is - there is plenty of waste in the DoD budget to be removed. Numerous redundant operational programs, billions in unwanted acquisitions from large defense contractor campaign donors, and a focus on building overseas infrastructure that we'll never use.

So naturally, the Pentagon wants to go after troop pay and benefits.  http://www.military.com/daily-news/2013/11/05/hagel-says-cuts-to-pay- a nd-benefits-are-needed.html

if you read TFA it's because they actually have some idea what they pay for those things...they have no clue how much they spend on procurement or what they get for it::


In its investigation, Reuters has found that the Pentagon is largely incapable of keeping track of its vast stores of weapons, ammunition and other supplies; thus it continues to spend money on new supplies it doesn't need and on storing others long out of date. It has amassed a backlog of more than half a trillion dollars in unaudited contracts with outside vendors; how much of that money paid for actual goods and services delivered isn't known. And it repeatedly falls prey to fraud and theft that can go undiscovered for years, often eventually detected by external law enforcement agencies.
The consequences aren't only financial; bad bookkeeping can affect the nation's defense. In one example of many, the Army lost track of $5.8 billion of supplies between 2003 and 2011 as it shuffled equipment between reserve and regular units. Affected units "may experience equipment shortages that could hinder their ability to train soldiers and respond to emergencies,"

And keep in mind, that tactics and Strategy are all fine and good, but largely irrelevant to the success of real wars, the key factor, as it has been since Scipio whooped  Hannibal, has been logistics.    If there is one thing I would expect the armed forced to be the best in the world at, its tracking materials and supplies,  they have a whole division of each service that has no other job than ...


In addition to that, there's a whole agency dedicated solely to logistics work: the Defense Logistics Agency. DLA is huge and has offices in many states. I'm perturbed that they don't have a handle on this.
 
2013-11-18 05:09:38 PM

kqc7011: As soon as the writer mentioned that $600 toilet seat I stopped reading. That to me indicates that the writer does / did not do his homework. That $600 toilet seat was for a very short run for seat and base that has to fit in a aircraft and must conform to Milspec and FAA regulations.
Go to a boat repair shop and ask to have them build you a fireproof fiberglass 4 foot counter top with a sink hole for your kitchen, then ask what it would cost.


So you are discounting the entire argument in the article because you found one error?
 
2013-11-18 05:37:30 PM

justinguarini4ever: kqc7011: As soon as the writer mentioned that $600 toilet seat I stopped reading. That to me indicates that the writer does / did not do his homework. That $600 toilet seat was for a very short run for seat and base that has to fit in a aircraft and must conform to Milspec and FAA regulations.
Go to a boat repair shop and ask to have them build you a fireproof fiberglass 4 foot counter top with a sink hole for your kitchen, then ask what it would cost.

So you are discounting the entire argument in the article because you found one error?


Not discounting the entire argument, disregarding it.  The toilet seat story is a signal to me that I cannot trust what is written.
 
2013-11-18 06:07:35 PM
Much of the money in actual fact is spent by fairly junior staff officers, volunteer troops with basically no professional training in financial systems. They screw up their bookkeeping, and sometimes that can't be fixed. Turnover is absolutely epic; people get transferred regularly, and fired not uncommonly, and continuity is a constant problem.

War's expensive, and often throwing money at the problem IS the answer. Once we get back to a peacetime garrison army, much of this will work itself out, but it's never going to be perfect.
 
2013-11-18 06:25:30 PM
Democratically elected or appointed corruption and incompetence.
 
2013-11-18 06:34:11 PM

Magorn: Sin_City_Superhero: "You don't REALLY think they spent twenty-thousand on a hammer...thirty-thousand on a toilet seat, do ya?"

Sadly they actually do.  The theory that it's all funneled to black ops?   doesn't work because there is a completely separate, incredibly gigantic, secret "black budget" for those things Congress also passes.

as the Onion observed:

Smart, Qualified People Behind The Scenes Keeping America Safe: 'We Don't Exist'


Yeah they either don't hire them or fire them if they find out they slipped through the cracks.
 
2013-11-18 06:59:33 PM
Who would ever expect this sort of thing from a government agency.
 
2013-11-18 07:37:37 PM

kqc7011: justinguarini4ever: kqc7011: As soon as the writer mentioned that $600 toilet seat I stopped reading. That to me indicates that the writer does / did not do his homework. That $600 toilet seat was for a very short run for seat and base that has to fit in a aircraft and must conform to Milspec and FAA regulations.
Go to a boat repair shop and ask to have them build you a fireproof fiberglass 4 foot counter top with a sink hole for your kitchen, then ask what it would cost.

So you are discounting the entire argument in the article because you found one error?

Not discounting the entire argument, disregarding it.  The toilet seat story is a signal to me that I cannot trust what is written.


In 1980, the ashtrays (Receiver, Ash, 1 each) for my Chinook helicopter cost $450 apiece. They were three pieces of stamped aluminum, one of which could slide up and down to open and close the ashtray. The passenger seats for my helicopter were $2500 each for a three-man seat. There are 10 of them in each helicopter, bright red. When the red faded out in the hot Hawaiian Sun, the pilots would instruct us to order new ones. We'd replace them approximately once a year.

We had an engine on my aircraft that kept getting high Exhaust Gas Temperature (EGT) readings. We had to cancel a few missions because of it. Our officers' solution was to have me stand in the side-door of the helicopter as we were hovering during a HIT check, and throw pebbles at the FOD screen of the engine until I could get one to go into the engine destroying it. A $300,000 engine.

We used to fly weekly from Oahu to Kahalui airport on Maui, so the pilots could get a Satellite Sundae at the airport restaurant. They were really good, but I dunno if they were worth using 1045 gallons of JP-4 aviation fuel to get one.

/$600 toilet seats, pfft
 
2013-11-18 10:33:00 PM
Page Not Found on the Reuters website.  Tinfoil Hat rebukers, explain this.

/I've noticed internet memes critical of the US military don't stay up long
 
2013-11-19 11:34:57 AM
i.imgur.com
this 4 subby, both for article (even if no longer @ Reuters) & headline
 
Displayed 50 of 50 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report