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(The Vine (Australia))   It's a meal designed to offend. Feast your eyes upon the Douche Burger, a burger made of wagyu beef, topped with foie gras and slathered in three different sauces - jalapeno, lime, mayo   ( divider line
    More: Spiffy, Douche Burger, Luke, Super Size Me, Idi Amin, paul, Morgan Spurlock, Collingwood, mission accomplished  
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8723 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Nov 2013 at 11:37 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-11-17 12:02:26 PM  
4 votes:
The burger condiment mish mashing didn't really get that bad till they started doing this with it...

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Mainly people who decide to make a bun out of an cheap, bottom of the barrel noodle, which actual poor people (mainly people who are not trust fund Hipsters making a fashion statement) subsist on when money gets tight; while charging out of the ass for it in price, should be skinned in the most ironic fashion.
2013-11-17 02:01:28 PM  
3 votes:

Gunderson: [ image 399x299]

This is a true doucheburger, but you probably never have heard of it before

"Have you ever eaten Kobe beef? No you haven't! You just paid for "Kobe beef"! In fact you can't even buy Kobe beef in this country, because it's only made in Japan, and it's illegal to import it. So if your local bistro is serving "Kobe sliders", just go across the street to White Castle, because IT'S THE SAME FARKING THING!!"

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/my favorite part, Lewis' response to a guy in a Dunkin Doughnuts commercial misrepresenting the term Artisan, "Well what a surprise, a Trust Fund Hipster talking out of his ass!"
2013-11-17 11:53:37 AM  
3 votes:
wouldn't that classify as a steak sandwich?
2013-11-17 11:58:16 AM  
2 votes:

Notabunny: Mayonaise is not food.

It's Satan's sperm, and anyone putting it near my food is taking their life in their hands.
2013-11-17 10:39:51 AM  
2 votes:
I think this is tongue in cheek.

And a true doucheburger would have artisinal Miracle Whip, not mayo.
2013-11-17 06:43:55 PM  
1 vote:
I'm pretty ok with $2-3/lb 80-85% ground beef, with a bit of garlic salt and pepper, loosely formed, and a slice of American "cheese" on a toasted cheap white or potato bun. Yes, with ketchup. And a salad.
I'm not fancy, and I like to be able to eat a burger without dislocating my jaw.
2013-11-17 02:27:35 PM  
1 vote:
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Wagyuu, eh?  Good luck grinding this.

I loved that the relatively lean Australian beef I could actually stand to eat in Japan was the cheap stuff at the grocery store while everybody paid top dollar for crap I'd have tossed straight in the dog's dish.

Had to relearn how to cook anything with beef in it in America because I got used to mentally estimating that half of it would be gone by the time it cooked.  First time I made some tacos back in Tennessee where I both started and ended with a pound of ground chuck I was confused.
2013-11-17 01:04:50 PM  
1 vote:
The wagyu beef burger is utterly pointless and makes it extra douchey. The entire reason why you would eat wagyu is because of the marbleization of the meat makes for some truly amazing steaks. They are super tender and more or less melt in your mouth. Once you grind up the meat it basically neutralizes the entire point of wagyu. You basically have burgers with an extra high amount of fat, which when cooked will mostly leave the burger.
2013-11-17 12:34:36 PM  
1 vote:
"Yes, the burger truly is the pizza of foods.".

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2013-11-17 12:34:09 PM  
1 vote:
It may be a doucheburger, but I would still attack that thing like a feral child on a fresh kill.
2013-11-17 12:26:03 PM  
1 vote:
The hipster douchebag label is being thrown around so often, I think those who keep using it ARE hipster douchebags.
2013-11-17 12:25:35 PM  
1 vote:

hubiestubert: Wagyu is a breed, and oddly enough, the US HAS Wagyu here on our soil--Yes, Virginia, the US raises Wagyu, right here. Kobe beef is an entirely different story, and there are very few licensed folks to carry Kobe here. Wagyu on the other hand, is much more readily available.

You don't wanna Wagyu beef in public.  You'll get arrested.
2013-11-17 12:05:58 PM  
1 vote:

dragonchild: FrancoFile: You know what goes w/ foie gras? Just a tiny bit of salt and pepper. It's already magical, it doesn't need a sauce.

That and I don't think the Japanese export their beef.  They don't make enough to meet domestic demand; they import the stuff from Australia.  And if you actually go all the way to Japan to eat real "wagyu", they're not going to put it in a goddamn burger.  You know what goes with wagyu?  Just some salt and pepper.  It's already magical; it doesn't need a sauce.

So. . . yeah.  Not only is Douche Burger douchey; odds are it's downright fake (especially at $20).

Wagyu is a breed, and oddly enough, the US HAS Wagyu here on our soil--Yes, Virginia, the US raises Wagyu, right here. Kobe beef is an entirely different story, and there are very few licensed folks to carry Kobe here. Wagyu on the other hand, is much more readily available.
2013-11-17 11:45:58 AM  
1 vote:
Mayonaise is not food.
2013-11-17 11:44:58 AM  
1 vote:
The mayonnaise alone is offensive.

/go to hell, mayonnaise
2013-11-17 11:44:28 AM  
1 vote:
They should have accompanied the burger with poutine au foie gras from Au Pied du Cochon.

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2013-11-17 09:11:14 AM  
1 vote:
LUKE: Has any foodstuff undergone so comprehensive a renaissance as the humble burger? For so long the scorned culinary province of teenagers, single dads and the humorously obese, over the last half a decade the burger has witnessed a return to zeitgeist perhaps rivalled only by skinny jeans and the music of Nile Rodgers.

The douche is strong with this one. Is this some sort of hipster douche irony that's he's a douche himself prodding other douches, or did merely eating the douche burger make him a douche? The world may never know.
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