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(NBC News)   Urban hens: Ova and out   (usnews.nbcnews.com) divider line 103
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8603 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Nov 2013 at 3:49 AM (48 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-11-17 12:38:46 AM  
tl;dr:

Eggs or GTFO
 
2013-11-17 12:44:02 AM  
Farking hipster pseudo-quasi-fufu-hippie assholes.
 
2013-11-17 12:48:18 AM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Farking hipster pseudo-quasi-fufu-hippie assholes.


that about says it all
 
2013-11-17 01:09:30 AM  
Hesitant to kill, pluck and eat a chicken, some people abandon the animal in a park or rural area.

These people have no farking right to eat meat.

Meat comes from living, breathing animals, asshole! Not Safeway.
 
2013-11-17 01:47:24 AM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: Hesitant to kill, pluck and eat a chicken, some people abandon the animal in a park or rural area.

These people have no farking right to eat meat.

Meat comes from living, breathing animals, asshole! Not Safeway.


Sure thing, Ted Nugent.
 
2013-11-17 03:51:54 AM  
Nevermind the huge numbers of dogs and cats people abandon... I try not to dwell on just how many animals people raise and then just abandon. It's not one of humanity's bright sides.
 
2013-11-17 03:56:13 AM  
"Ova and out"???

Settle down and rest with me
Oh fly with me lesbian seagull chicken
 
2013-11-17 03:56:32 AM  
It's not an abandoned pet, you don't put it in a goddamn shelter... just feed the farker to someone.
 
2013-11-17 03:58:49 AM  
Just bring in the coyotes to go after the chickens.
 
2013-11-17 04:02:20 AM  
It's enough to make one cry fowl....
 
2013-11-17 04:02:33 AM  
i.imgur.com

This is necessary.
 
2013-11-17 04:04:25 AM  
Yeah, that's the part of raising your own eggs that a lot of people seem blissfully unaware of.  Chickens play out, and once they do, you've got two choices:

(1) continue to waste food and money on feed and housing for chickens that will never lay another egg, or
(2) give them a new career as fricassée.

Apparently these people decided to pick the third nonexistent option.
 
2013-11-17 04:05:00 AM  
Stupid. Why not just butcher it and roast the biatch? Chickens are the quickest and easiest kill. Kind of a biatch to clean, but not as bad as butchering a hog. Waste of food not to.
 
2013-11-17 04:09:03 AM  
If you don't want to butcher the chicken yourself, why not just take it to an actual butcher?
 
2013-11-17 04:10:45 AM  
Seems like a good way to feed the homeless on the cheap.
 
2013-11-17 04:11:52 AM  

Nogale: If you don't want to butcher the chicken yourself, why not just take it to an actual butcher?


I would imagine a lot of butchers wouldn't be willing to take the bird. But that's silly, eating your own kill is very satisfying.
 
2013-11-17 04:23:42 AM  
Chickens begin laying eggs where they're 4 to 6 months old and are most productive for about two years, University of Wisconsin poultry specialist Ron Kean said.

images1.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-11-17 04:24:29 AM  
I wish people would start abandoning them where I live.  I would adopt them and give them a nice, loving home, one where they would be roasted and served up with stuffing, mashed potatoes, and green beans.
 
2013-11-17 04:32:29 AM  
While it's wasteful to not "take care of" a chicken you don't want anymore, I'm not going to get too up in arms about it. Chickens aren't quite as resourceful as feral cats and dogs. Chances are they probably get killed by a coyote, raccoon or possum inside of a week or two.

Can't say I'd like to be killed and eaten by something that leaks foul odors from their anus, but at least the chickens aren't roaming around or dying of starvation.
 
2013-11-17 04:32:32 AM  
Those poor... wait, what? Who the fark owns a chicken in the city? Farking hippies.
 
2013-11-17 04:33:04 AM  
Hens are abandoned when they stop laying eggs.

There's something very symbolic in that.
 
2013-11-17 04:37:48 AM  
Maybe KFC should start putting drop-off boxes in every restaurant
 
2013-11-17 04:50:23 AM  

robohobo: Stupid. Why not just butcher it and roast the biatch? Chickens are the quickest and easiest kill. Kind of a biatch to clean, but not as bad as butchering a hog. Waste of food not to.


I know a couple back in Portland who keep some laying hens.  The reason they don't kill them (at least with this particular couple, and likely a lot of the other neu-hippies out there) is that they've come to view the things as pets.  All of their chickens have names, and are fussed over just as passionately as your average rich girl's purse chihuahua.  When one of their hens managed to break its neck a while back, they buried it in their back yard and gave it a freaking headstone.

I told them next time they should give the dead bird to me and I'll make a nice meal of it.  They were  offended.
 
2013-11-17 04:53:23 AM  
www.sistersatellite.com

Here's a perfectly reasonable solution.

There's a guy about a half mile from my house who feeds a flock of about 50 pigeons every day. I suspect a kindly soul could slip a coupla ole girls into the mix without too much effort. I like the idea of feral chickens.
 
2013-11-17 05:05:15 AM  

redmid17: While it's wasteful to not "take care of" a chicken you don't want anymore, I'm not going to get too up in arms about it. Chickens aren't quite as resourceful as feral cats and dogs. Chances are they probably get killed by a coyote, raccoon or possum inside of a week or two.

Can't say I'd like to be killed and eaten by something that leaks foul odors from their anus, but at least the chickens aren't roaming around or dying of starvation.


Bonus: they won't breed because they can't lay eggs.
 
2013-11-17 05:26:48 AM  
Oh well. All that means is that they're going to ban chickens in urban areas. Because you farked up.
 
2013-11-17 05:31:57 AM  
Thanks for all the eggs. And manure. And bug patrol. And entertainment for the kids. You can live here 'til you fall off the perch.
 
2013-11-17 05:38:49 AM  

whidbey: Oh well. All that means is that they're going to ban chickens in urban areas. Because you farked up.


Yes this is clearly an epidemic worthy of immediate, swift, and harshly punitive measures
 
2013-11-17 05:42:21 AM  
Stupid farking hipsters are probably abandoning them once they realize there's a little work involved. Someone should kill these idiots before they multiply.
 
2013-11-17 05:44:13 AM  

Yes this is dog: Seems like a good way to feed the homeless on the cheap.

-=-
Came here to say that if I was homeless in that park, there would be no chickens.

"Sir, could I have a few bucks for some spices?"
 
2013-11-17 05:44:47 AM  
What an old hen might look like.

bnnreports.com
 
2013-11-17 06:14:09 AM  

Smirky the Wonder Chimp: Yeah, that's the part of raising your own eggs that a lot of people seem blissfully unaware of.  Chickens play out, and once they do, you've got two choices:

(1) continue to waste food and money on feed and housing for chickens that will never lay another egg, or
(2) give them a new career as fricassée.

Apparently these people decided to pick the third nonexistent option.


(3) pet chickens

//is the third and really oddball option. Chickens are not really pet quality animals, in general. Now ducks make nice pets, but they are extremely emotional needy, which should be something that Farkers can relate.
 
2013-11-17 06:25:01 AM  
Honestly what needs to be done is people who are selling the urban chickens and products need to start fostering the idea of 'what happens in a year or three'. It may certainly make some second guess doing it, but overall I think it would keep people doing it longer. The way it is now, people think of them as pets with a purpose. They're not great pets, but they do not think of them as food. But when it's no longer meeting it's purpose, they can't get more chickens unless they make room....but they would never kill the quasi-pet.

If at the start you view it as urban farming, AND provide an outlet for them to take the chickens to rather than doing their own slaughter, I think most would be okay with it. Especially if they didn't want to eat it themselves, but could donate it to a food pantry, or soup kitchen. That would also probably be a great resource for people with too many eggs too.
 
2013-11-17 06:37:09 AM  
this story gives me a sad.
/love seeing stories about chickens otherwise.
//interesting creatures with personalities
///tasty too
 
2013-11-17 06:45:57 AM  

Nogale: If you don't want to butcher the chicken yourself, why not just take it to an actual butcher?


This.
 
2013-11-17 06:57:23 AM  
Chickens are only productive for two years??? I must have had super chickens then, my hens laid much longer than that, pretty regularly, not some huge drop off. And when they were old, I used their poop for the garden. I did notice though, years ago, that the chicken feed I usually got at the feed store started changing, dropping in quality and lowering egg quality so I had to supplement more of their diet with scraps and bugs. I wonder what kind of chickens these people are buying and what they are feeding them.
 
2013-11-17 07:45:03 AM  
There's a reason chicken and dumplings is delicious, you morons!
 
2013-11-17 07:49:53 AM  
Are there not santiera ceremonies for such as these?  Maybe those are roosters; my mistake.
 
2013-11-17 07:52:03 AM  
ecmoRandomNumbers [TotalFark] 2013-11-17 01:09:30 AM Hesitant to kill, pluck and eat a chicken, some people abandon the animal in a park or rural area.These people have no farking right to eat meat.Meat comes from living, breathing animals, asshole! Not Safeway.I'm pretty sure meat comes from dead animals.Except some sushi,but that's fish, not meat so eat it on Friday & it'll be ok.
 
2013-11-17 07:54:57 AM  
bleah... unix returns? 0d0a...
 
2013-11-17 08:07:32 AM  
Thanks for all the eggs. And manure. And bug patrol. And entertainment for the kids. You can live here 'til you fall off the perch.

THIS.

Used to have pet chickens, will have them again when I move to my farm.
 
2013-11-17 08:07:42 AM  
I can't believe people would waste such amazing meat.  We should make a website where these people can log onto and find others nearby who would happily take their non-laying chickens off their hands for them.
 
2013-11-17 08:23:42 AM  

LadyHawke: I can't believe people would waste such amazing meat.  We should make a website where these people can log onto and find others nearby who would happily take their non-laying chickens off their hands for them.


Now I haven't had to pluck a chicken for about 20 years but I remember it being a huge pain in the ass. I wouldn't have a problem lopping off its head or ringing its neck but plucking it would have to be someone else.

Kinda making me miss my great-grandparent's farm. They died when I was a senior in high school and the family sold it to some developer and it's now a housing development. :/
 
2013-11-17 08:25:02 AM  

robohobo: Nogale: If you don't want to butcher the chicken yourself, why not just take it to an actual butcher?

I would imagine a lot of butchers wouldn't be willing to take the bird. But that's silly, eating your own kill is very satisfying.


I would imagine it would be a lot easier than you would think.  I know of several butcher shops offering meat processing as part of their business, as in they don't own the animal, you do.  To clarify, you take them an animal and they just do the butchering process and hand you the meat back.  Most often it is deer, but I would imagine they really don't care if it was a chicken.  They won't kill it for you though.

/The last I checked, the going rate for processing a deer is $70
//yes they are checked to make sure they are maintaining the same health standards as butchering any other animal
 
2013-11-17 08:30:20 AM  
Truth be told, old laying hens have a tendency to be pretty tough.  Of course, coq au vin was created for such a bird.  If you don't want to go to the trouble of that, laying hens make an awfully tasty stew or you can pressure cook the meat for casseroles and the like; then cook the bones and less meaty parts for the best chicken stock ever to grace your kitchen.

Using chickens for the eggs and then abandoning them is unconscionable.  Cowardly, even.  Humanely slaughtering them and using the meat is far more responsible and humane than abandoning them.
 
2013-11-17 08:36:50 AM  
you are supposed to eat them.   They are tough.  you make stew.  crock pot all day.  i love my chickens.
 
2013-11-17 08:39:22 AM  

lack of warmth: robohobo: Nogale: If you don't want to butcher the chicken yourself, why not just take it to an actual butcher?

I would imagine a lot of butchers wouldn't be willing to take the bird. But that's silly, eating your own kill is very satisfying.

I would imagine it would be a lot easier than you would think.  I know of several butcher shops offering meat processing as part of their business, as in they don't own the animal, you do.  To clarify, you take them an animal and they just do the butchering process and hand you the meat back.  Most often it is deer, but I would imagine they really don't care if it was a chicken.  They won't kill it for you though.

/The last I checked, the going rate for processing a deer is $70
//yes they are checked to make sure they are maintaining the same health standards as butchering any other animal


In most rural areas, there is a small poultry processor who will take birds and dress them for you.  Usually a couple bucks a bird.  As far as state and federal inspectors are concerned, there is a different set of standards for poultry processing and for large animal processing so the guy that does your deer may not be willing or even allowed to take poultry.  If you know of a farmer at your local farmer's market who sells chickens (providing that's allowed in your area), talk to him because he's getting his birds processed somewhere and he'll be able to point you in that direction.
 
2013-11-17 08:43:17 AM  

bigsteve3OOO: you are supposed to eat them.   They are tough.  you make stew.  crock pot all day.  i love my chickens.


This. Collect eggs while they're laying, let a few grow up and replace the current stock you have, and then kill the ones that aren't laying anymore for dinner. Such is the cycle of the farm.
 
2013-11-17 08:47:07 AM  
Clouse, who like many opponents of keeping urban chickens advocates a vegan diet.

farm4.staticflickr.com
 
2013-11-17 08:47:27 AM  

Gwendolyn: Now I haven't had to pluck a chicken for about 20 years but I remember it being a huge pain in the ass.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jMGZMoENjcU

Or, for those with limited space/money:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xlKr8AKEqBc
 
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