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(New Musical Express)   The thirty greatest crimes committed against music. Let's see: Nickelback, Bieber, the Gallagher Brothers, Queen, One Direction--wait, Queen, what the hell?   (nme.com) divider line 133
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5365 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 16 Nov 2013 at 4:26 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-11-16 05:40:51 PM  
Dwight_Yeast

The suit really feels like a money grab from the Gayes.

Doesn't SOUNG that way to me. The very first time I heard Blurred Lines, within the first few measures, I said to myself, "self, that's a gotdang ripoff of Give It Up by Marvin."
 
2013-11-16 05:46:42 PM  

stonelotus: LeroyBourne: Bowie gets a pass for that shiat, because he's Bowie and my hero.  And he was banging MJ for shiats and giggles.

mind bleach cannot erase the horrifying image you just created of David Bowie sodomizing a feces covered, hysterically laughing Michael Jackson.


I guess it's not weird, but I just didn't want to type out mick jagger and the thought came into my head someone will think of michael jackson.

I do like the 'hysterically laughing' part, that's just wrong.  Time to drink!
 
2013-11-16 05:47:33 PM  

simplicimus: Who did that horrible cover of "Behind Blue Eyes"? I'm thinking Lincoln Park or Limp Bizkut, bit I'm probably wrong. Oh, and from a decade ago, whatever country singer covered "Piece of my Heart".


Best cover of Behind Blue Eyes (but sadly just a few moments and not the full song) that I've every heard: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1GbVjEApiPU
 
2013-11-16 05:50:24 PM  
Sheryl Crow's "D'yer Mak'er."  Worst. cover. ever.
 
2013-11-16 05:50:29 PM  

SuperTramp: Dwight_Yeast

The suit really feels like a money grab from the Gayes.

Doesn't SOUNG that way to me. The very first time I heard Blurred Lines, within the first few measures, I said to myself, "self, that's a gotdang ripoff of Give It Up by Marvin."


Han shot first...

http://marquee.blogs.cnn.com/2013/08/16/robin-thicke-pharell-and-t-i -s ue-over-blurred-lines/

In short, the Gaye family *counter-sued* after they were sued first.
 
2013-11-16 05:51:37 PM  

fusillade762: So the impression I'm getting here is that they hate covers and Canadians. About right?


Yup, that's what I got out of it too. In a lot of cases they're not entirely wrong, but who's really offended by Michael Buble? That's just silly.
 
2013-11-16 05:52:52 PM  
Sheryl Crow's cover of "Sweet Child O' Mine"

Sweet Child O' Mine was also used as the background music recently for a Johnson & Johnson commercial. (I think it was played on something like a xylophone)
 
2013-11-16 05:53:03 PM  

BATMANATEE: I like Queen but I HATE Radio Ga Ga. Was the point to be meta and produce a song just as shiatty as the shaitty music they were making fun of? Is it supposed to be parody?


To be fair, I actually quite enjoy that '80s Britpop sound. I'm not saying that it's "good" music, but it is fun enough for me to listen to if I feel like singing terribly in my car.

Also, I love the piano in Radio Ga Ga, but I'm also usually a sucker for piano music in general, which comes from a totally uncritical place (by which I mean that it lights up the parts of my brain that produce excessive amounts of dopamine).
 
2013-11-16 05:56:08 PM  

Pokey.Clyde: Sheryl Crow's cover of "Sweet Child O' Mine"

Sweet Child O' Mine was also used as the background music recently for a Johnson & Johnson commercial. (I think it was played on something like a xylophone)


I'm waiting for Ozzy to sell out 'no more tears' to J & J.  I guess watching the commercial of a baby jamming out in the tub covered in soap and no tears to that song would be kinda cute.
 
2013-11-16 05:56:50 PM  

lasercannon: [www.abbaomnibus.net image 450x327]

Hey guys, what's going on?


The weird thing about ABBA is that their production is horribly dated (70s discoey Europop) and their lyrics are insipid, but the tunes are infectious and sung with talent and commitment. So they're both horrible and awesome, which makes them a great guilty pleasure.
 
2013-11-16 05:59:00 PM  

EngineerBoy: Han shot first...

http://marquee.blogs.cnn.com/2013/08/16/robin-thicke-pharell-and-t-i -s ue-over-blurred-lines/

In short, the Gaye family *counter-sued* after they were sued first.


They were sued first because the Gayes were essentially shaking Thicke & Co. down for a settlement beforehand.
 
2013-11-16 06:00:24 PM  

Pokey.Clyde: Sheryl Crow's cover of "Sweet Child O' Mine"

Sweet Child O' Mine was also used as the background music recently for a Johnson & Johnson commercial. (I think it was played on something like a xylophone)


But Etta's cover of Welcome to the Jungle was better than the original (sorry, Axl.)
 
2013-11-16 06:05:20 PM  

EngineerBoy: http://marquee.blogs.cnn.com/2013/08/16/robin-thicke-pharell-and-t-i -s ue-over-blurred-lines/

In short, the Gaye family *counter-sued* after they were sued first.


Or look at it another way: the Gayes were pushing for a cash settlement (ie, a money grab) and threatening a lawsuit, so Thicke et al called their bluff.

Tends to go towards my point, especially as it's rare for a plagiarism suit to go to court these days.  Most get settled out-of-court; see the Wayne Coyne/Cat Stevens case I mentioned earlier.
 
2013-11-16 06:05:27 PM  

The Bestest: EngineerBoy: Han shot first...

http://marquee.blogs.cnn.com/2013/08/16/robin-thicke-pharell-and-t-i -s ue-over-blurred-lines/

In short, the Gaye family *counter-sued* after they were sued first.

They were sued first because the Gayes were essentially shaking Thicke & Co. down for a settlement beforehand.


Let it go, largest exposed granitic pluton in the world. Are they still doing the laser light shows in the summer?
 
2013-11-16 06:14:56 PM  
Oh, noes, someone doesn't like something I like.

Wait, why are Scissor Sister's on there?

Picking up on the Pink Floyd covers theme, Jayo Tvaof added: "But The Scissor Sisters mutilation of 'Comfortably Numb' was worse."

Oh, it's just Pink Floyd, it's not like anything of artistic merit was sullied.

Speaking of the Scissor Sisters, they do a great cover of Franz Ferdinand's "Take Me Out"
 
2013-11-16 06:21:33 PM  
Ok, the list only had one Gallagher brother, subby....doing an atrocious cover of "Gimme Shelter"

//that cover gave me cancer
 
2013-11-16 06:28:03 PM  
Two words about Queen: Live Aid.

They came out of retirement for all intents and purposes, and blew the field away. It was their best show. Go YouTube it. Ah fark it here it is. I'll watch it now why not.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQsM6u0a038
 
2013-11-16 06:33:18 PM  
I'd like to mention Linkin Park's cover of Wish and then the whole album Hesitation Marks. Blargh it's even worse than WITHA TEETHA.
 
2013-11-16 06:52:24 PM  
Queen is music for lazy teenagers who are unable to find any good new music.


 

A Terrible Human: then the whole album Hesitation Marks.



I was really disappointed in this. The album seems to have received quite a bit of acclaim and all the previewed tracks were great... but the album had maybe only 1 or 2 other good tracks on it. The rest was completely forgettable.
 
2013-11-16 06:52:43 PM  

notyomama: Spadababababababa Spadina Bus: notyomama: simplicimus: Who did that horrible cover of "Behind Blue Eyes"? I'm thinking Lincoln Park or Limp Bizkut, bit I'm probably wrong. Oh, and from a decade ago, whatever country singer covered "Piece of my Heart".

I have never heard any other covers of anything that make me angrier than those two.

Challenge accepted:

http://youtu.be/lGt54Ozo8LQ

Ok, you win.  Why did you do that to me?  I couldn't make it through 10 seconds of that tripe.

*Sobs and covers face with hands*


Misery loves company, my friend.
 
2013-11-16 06:52:54 PM  

awfulperson: On an unrelated note, I am really tired of seeing musicians with scarred up, intentionally abused guitars. Willie Nelson's guitar is a bundle of twigs, held together with hemp. HE might have an excuse; the douche above and Courtney Love do not.


That's authenticity. Nelson didn't buy a beat up guitar. He beat it up by beating the music out of it.

Nowadays? They sell authenticity at the local store.

craigdamage: Queen is best appreciated in a big open room through big speakers.


Good music generally is.
 
2013-11-16 07:01:39 PM  

Smelly McUgly: I always have hated Queen with a passion, but then I heard "Radio Gaga" because of GTA V. Now I'm re-thinking my position on them and wondering if I should give them another, more extensive listen.

/But not "Bohemian Rhapsody." NEVER AGAIN.


I don't think Radio Gaga is even in my top 20 favorite Queen songs, you should definitely listen to some more.
 
2013-11-16 07:06:26 PM  

FeedTheCollapse: Queen is music for lazy teenagers who are unable to find any good new music.


 A Terrible Human: then the whole album Hesitation Marks.


I was really disappointed in this. The album seems to have received quite a bit of acclaim and all the previewed tracks were great... but the album had maybe only 1 or 2 other good tracks on it. The rest was completely forgettable.


Yeah, our musical heroes should never get clean, it totally ruins their art. We'll always have The Downward Spiral, though.
 
2013-11-16 07:06:58 PM  

H31N0US: Two words about Queen: Live Aid.

They came out of retirement for all intents and purposes, and blew the field away. It was their best show. Go YouTube it. Ah fark it here it is. I'll watch it now why not.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQsM6u0a038


FTFY.
 
2013-11-16 07:16:48 PM  

SuperTramp: Are they still doing the laser light shows in the summer?


..and artificial snow in the winter
 
2013-11-16 07:18:30 PM  

Spadababababababa Spadina Bus: notyomama: simplicimus: Who did that horrible cover of "Behind Blue Eyes"? I'm thinking Lincoln Park or Limp Bizkut, bit I'm probably wrong. Oh, and from a decade ago, whatever country singer covered "Piece of my Heart".

I have never heard any other covers of anything that make me angrier than those two.

Challenge accepted:

http://youtu.be/lGt54Ozo8LQ


I really wish I hadn't clicked on that

/Didn't know Everlast had a son
 
2013-11-16 07:20:55 PM  

Mr_Ectomy: FeedTheCollapse: Queen is music for lazy teenagers who are unable to find any good new music.


 A Terrible Human: then the whole album Hesitation Marks.


I was really disappointed in this. The album seems to have received quite a bit of acclaim and all the previewed tracks were great... but the album had maybe only 1 or 2 other good tracks on it. The rest was completely forgettable.

Yeah, our musical heroes should never get clean, it totally ruins their art. We'll always have The Downward Spiral, though.


Year Zero was fantastic and he was sober then too. I dunno the whole album seemed like stuff that was too boring to put on that How to Destroy Angels album.
 
2013-11-16 07:28:08 PM  

A Terrible Human: Year Zero was fantastic and he was sober then too. I dunno the whole album seemed like stuff that was too boring to put on that How to Destroy Angels album.


That's true, but maybe it was a combination of sobriety AND a NIN hiatus. Don't care, going to see them in 8 days and I'm  STOKED!
 
2013-11-16 07:45:29 PM  

Mr_Ectomy: A Terrible Human: Year Zero was fantastic and he was sober then too. I dunno the whole album seemed like stuff that was too boring to put on that How to Destroy Angels album.

That's true, but maybe it was a combination of sobriety AND a NIN hiatus. Don't care, going to see them in 8 days and I'm  STOKED!


Oooh lucky. :p
 
2013-11-16 08:04:40 PM  

AdrienVeidt: Queen is a band of extremely talented individuals that can't come together to make a good song.  Bohemian Rhapsody isn't the worst song in the universe, but it's a medley of random songs chopped up in a blender, with no artistic merit.  Their work on Flash Gordon and Highlander was stale and dated immediately upon release, and do nothing to improve the movies.  It's ugly to say it, but their reputation was saved by Freddie's death since we don't get to see them descend into Elton John-levels of schmaltz.


And yet all of it is still vastly better than most of us here come ever come up with.
 
2013-11-16 08:10:14 PM  

awfulperson: "Hey, remember when Bowie and Jagger teamed up and made mooney eyes at each other while they danced together on a fake street? That really scarred me for life! Boo-hoo-hoo! what a CRIME."


"Oh, Em, Gee, they added QUEEN?! How DARE they!! Well, I ought to just mreh--mehhh-blehh-blehh..."

What a stupid list.

On an unrelated note, I am really tired of seeing musicians with scarred up, intentionally abused guitars. Willie Nelson's guitar is a bundle of twigs, held together with hemp. HE might have an excuse; the douche above and Courtney Love do not.


Some of those banged up and abused guitars have "character".  They are like a fine wine, they get better with age.  Certain model Strats and Les Pauls are like that.  I'll give an example I am quite familiar with.  Blues artist Tommy Castro has a couple of dozen guitars.  Most of the time he uses a specific Strat for his shows because he likes the sound and the action.  It's old, the paint rubbed off, scratches all over it.  He could easily grab a different Strat from his collection, but he likes that one.
 
2013-11-16 08:14:18 PM  

H31N0US: Two words about Queen: Live Aid.

They came out of retirement for all intents and purposes, and blew the field away. It was their best show. Go YouTube it. Ah fark it here it is. I'll watch it now why not.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQsM6u0a038


Even the other artists (and there were some big names there) agreed that Queen and Freddie owned that show.
 
2013-11-16 08:14:23 PM  

bearded clamorer: Deslided

Oh, and add almost everything from the Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band movie soundtrack.


Let's leave Earth Wind & Fire out of this. Please. I hope that's what you meant by "almost".
 
2013-11-16 08:23:00 PM  

Mrbogey: The entry-

Stephen Johnson suggested Queen, along with a couple of others. "I just can't see why people like them", he writes.


Somehow I suspect he never heard anything of theirs beyond "Another One Bites the Dust" and "Body Language".
 
2013-11-16 08:26:28 PM  

FrancoFile: Either I am totally out of touch with music, or that list is really Brit-centric.  I have no idea who half those people were.


Considering that NME is a British publication that focuses mainly on British artists.....
 
2013-11-16 08:28:09 PM  
Fark, I am disappoint. It is a scientific fact that the two biggest musical abortions ever committed are:

A. Winger's cover of Purple Haze
B. Believe by Cher

These two things are completely totally indefensible, irredeemable & grounds for waterboating.

You may now continue your hatefest over bieber & Nickelback.
 
2013-11-16 08:37:20 PM  

Straight Outta Wells Branch: Fark, I am disappoint. It is a scientific fact that the two biggest musical abortions ever committed are:

A. Winger's cover of Purple Haze
B. Believe by Cher

These two things are completely totally indefensible, irredeemable & grounds for waterboating.

You may now continue your hatefest over bieber & Nickelback.


I haven't heard the first one, but I can imagine how bad it is.  I have, unfortunately, heard Cher's Believe.  It made me wish I had been born deaf.
 
2013-11-16 08:59:00 PM  

BATMANATEE: I like Queen but I HATE Radio Ga Ga. Was the point to be meta and produce a song just as shiatty as the shaitty music they were making fun of? Is it supposed to be parody?


That was actually how I took the song to be honest.
 
2013-11-16 09:11:46 PM  
"Stephen Johnson suggested Queen, along with a couple of others. "I just can't see why people like them", he writes."

Let me get this straight, three people voted for Queen and that's all it takes to get them included in the 30 greatest crimes committed against music?  What the fark kind of survey was this?
 
2013-11-16 09:16:55 PM  

eaglepuss: bearded clamorer: Deslided

Oh, and add almost everything from the Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band movie soundtrack.

Let's leave Earth Wind & Fire out of this. Please. I hope that's what you meant by "almost".


I was scrolling thru the comments to make sure someone else made this exact point. If you hadn't, I would have.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJIo0AP3MCM

pure awesomeness.
 
2013-11-16 09:29:50 PM  
Forget it, Jake, it's New Musical Express.
 
2013-11-16 09:33:20 PM  

FrancoFile: notyomama: simplicimus: Who did that horrible cover of "Behind Blue Eyes"? I'm thinking Lincoln Park or Limp Bizkut, bit I'm probably wrong. Oh, and from a decade ago, whatever country singer covered "Piece of my Heart".

I have never heard any other covers of anything that make me angrier than those two.    I already hated Limp Bizkit but that cover enraged me.  The country singer was Faith Hill and I have hated her ever since.  How dare she bastardize Janis' song.

Madonna's cover of American Pie.

/worst. cover. ever.


I'd go with Pearl Jam covering Last Kiss or Billy Idol covering Heroin.
 
2013-11-16 09:36:14 PM  
This, then everything else...

storage.canoe.ca

/probably a crime against everything.
 
2013-11-16 09:39:20 PM  

FeedTheCollapse: Queen is music for lazy teenagers who are unable to find any good new music.


 A Terrible Human: then the whole album Hesitation Marks.


I was really disappointed in this. The album seems to have received quite a bit of acclaim and all the previewed tracks were great... but the album had maybe only 1 or 2 other good tracks on it. The rest was completely forgettable.


When I was a teen, Queen WAS good, new music

/Check out "Back to the Light" by  Brian May
 
2013-11-16 09:39:55 PM  

Boris S. Wort: This, then everything else...

[storage.canoe.ca image 603x520]

/probably a crime against everything.


You are really not making Canadians look any better, dammit!
 
2013-11-16 09:47:53 PM  
I sort of had a brush with interpretive criminality just tonight.

I heard the Flaming Lips doing "No Quarter".

The first half-minute was amusing because I thought they were trying to be funny.  I love a good parody.  When ultimately there was no discernible punchline, I have to admit that I was a little put off by the experience, as if they had cheapened the song for no good purpose.

Judging it as criminal would probably be too harsh, because I'd defend their right to sing whatever they want to sing.

But it definitely left me thinking it was poorly thought out, kinda like Rosanne Barr's national anthem.

And I found that interesting because I don't consider myself a huge Zep fan.

/maybe I just heard the piece out of context...

//babble filter inop tonight...
 
2013-11-16 10:14:25 PM  

Straight Outta Wells Branch: B. Believe by Cher


..also known as the song that brought Autotune into the mainstream
 
2013-11-16 10:16:01 PM  
With all the Queen talk...no one's wondering how these guys made the list?


cdn.geeknation.com
 
2013-11-16 10:25:07 PM  

SuperTramp: Pokey.Clyde: Sheryl Crow's cover of "Sweet Child O' Mine"

Sweet Child O' Mine was also used as the background music recently for a Johnson & Johnson commercial. (I think it was played on something like a xylophone)

But Etta's cover of Welcome to the Jungle was better than the original (sorry, Axl.)


I can appreciate the style, her voice, and that she was INTO that shiat.

But, goddamn. I want to stick an M-80 in your dickhole for making me click that link. Good gawd.
 
2013-11-16 10:32:36 PM  
Anyone who dislikes Queen will immediately desolve into a puddle of wet human remains on attempt to enter my home. Anyone who wrote in Queen on this list will do it in their own homes. You've got a perfectly good opportunity to present your idiotic tastes in music to a rag no one's paid any attention to since its inception and you blow it by trying to be a hipster.

/How is autotune not even on the list? Because Adventure Time pulled a great joke out of it?
 
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