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(BBC)   Kenyan and friends run down a couple of cheetahs. This is why they win our marathons   (bbc.co.uk) divider line 62
    More: Cool, goats, Kenyans, Canadian Wildlife Service, Kenya Wildlife Service, car chase  
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7300 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Nov 2013 at 7:13 PM (21 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-11-15 05:05:59 PM
Meh. Cheetahs are fast, but they have almost no stamina. Their bodies are simply unable to cool themselves while running at full speed and also the sprint will burn up their energy reserves very quickly.

Humans, on the other hand, are built for long-distance endurance running. On an open savannah where the cheetah has nowhere to really hide, I would give the upper hand to the people.
 
2013-11-15 05:11:05 PM
Jesus!  Enough with the Obama threads today!  give it a rest!
 
2013-11-15 05:21:32 PM
In 'Merika we put a fat guy in a helicopter with a rifle. We're civilized like that.
 
2013-11-15 05:31:14 PM

ecmoRandomNumbers: In 'Merika we put a fat guy in a helicopter with a rifle. We're civilized like that.


They do the same thing in Russia, except Putin leaps from the helicopter with his bear hands and lands on the cheetah.  then he makes a loincloth out of its skin.
 
2013-11-15 05:47:57 PM
Persistence hunting. Humans are some scary mother farkers.

Most animals, you just run away from. If you get away you're fine.

With humans - nope. They don't stop. They keep coming. You run away, take a rest, look up, and there they are, slowly coming at ya. Runaway again, take a nap, wake up, and there they are again, still coming. They have almost no need for sleep. They won't stop. No matter how fast or how far you run, they keep coming until you drop.

We are like the real life version of every b-movie serial killer.
 
2013-11-15 06:02:03 PM

impaler: Persistence hunting. Humans are some scary mother farkers.

Most animals, you just run away from. If you get away you're fine.

With humans - nope. They don't stop. They keep coming. You run away, take a rest, look up, and there they are, slowly coming at ya. Runaway again, take a nap, wake up, and there they are again, still coming. They have almost no need for sleep. They won't stop. No matter how fast or how far you run, they keep coming until you drop.

We are like the real life version of every b-movie serial killer.


sooooo,you are saying this was a documentary?

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-11-15 06:11:50 PM

impaler: Persistence hunting. Humans are some scary mother farkers.

Most animals, you just run away from. If you get away you're fine.

With humans - nope. They don't stop. They keep coming. You run away, take a rest, look up, and there they are, slowly coming at ya. Runaway again, take a nap, wake up, and there they are again, still coming. They have almost no need for sleep. They won't stop. No matter how fast or how far you run, they keep coming until you drop.

We are like the real life version of every b-movie serial killer.


I have a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long evolution. Skills that make me a nightmare for creatures like you. I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.
 
2013-11-15 06:30:18 PM

ManateeGag: ecmoRandomNumbers: In 'Merika we put a fat guy in a helicopter with a rifle. We're civilized like that.

They do the same thing in Russia, except Putin leaps from the helicopter with his bear hands and lands on the cheetah.  then he makes a loincloth out of its skin.


That's why he needed two cheetahs.
 
2013-11-15 06:46:47 PM

ManateeGag: They do the same thing in Russia, except Putin leaps from the helicopter with his  bear hands  and lands on the cheetah.  then he makes a loincloth out of its skin.


This isn't a typo, either. He killed the bear and wears its hands as gloves so he can get a good grip on the Cheetahs.
 
2013-11-15 06:55:37 PM
Can't sleep.  Humans will hunt me.  Can't sleep.  Humans will hunt me.
 
2013-11-15 06:56:50 PM
Human beings area adapted to this kind of long-distance running. In an anthropology class about 20 years ago we watched a documentary showing how some African tribesmen could run down a giraffe to kill it in their traditional way, with spears. Basically, it was a long distance tag team, and it was pretty amazing to watch. Sad for the giraffe, it concluded with the butchering. But it really illustrated the way in which humans can be superior when working as a team...  hmmm
 
2013-11-15 06:59:10 PM
Tried and true method, especially since animals on the run have a tendency to circle.  Position hunters at intervals and it becomes the deadliest relay race ever
 
2013-11-15 07:13:00 PM
The villagers captured them alive and handed them over to the Kenya Wildlife Service.

"I need compensation from them because the cheetahs killed most of my goats," Nur Osman Hassan told the BBC's Somali Service.


Is this a cultural thing, expecting money from the authorities when you approach them over an event that caused you loss, but which had absolutely nothing to do with them?  I recall seeing a documentary about a little boat sinking in the Persian Gulf, and a US Carrier group saving the crew - the first thing they did once on board the Navy ship was to demand money to pay for their boat that sank.
 
2013-11-15 07:16:55 PM
Well, I guess this confirms the validity of an old joke I heard...

What is the worlds Fastest animal?

An Ethiopian Chicken

/Yes, tasteless I know... just like the chicken they couldn't catch.
 
2013-11-15 07:19:45 PM

ManateeGag: ecmoRandomNumbers: In 'Merika we put a fat guy in a helicopter with a rifle. We're civilized like that.

They do the same thing in Russia, except Putin leaps from the helicopter with his bear hands and lands on the cheetah.  then he makes a loincloth out of its skin.


I heard Putin needs at least two cheetahs to cover his loins.
 
2013-11-15 07:21:53 PM

RexTalionis: Meh. Cheetahs are fast, but they have almost no stamina. Their bodies are simply unable to cool themselves while running at full speed and also the sprint will burn up their energy reserves very quickly.

Humans, on the other hand, are built for long-distance endurance running. On an open savannah where the cheetah has nowhere to really hide, I would give the upper hand to the people.


Exactly, endurance hunts used to be one way our ancestors hunted. Chasing prey with our innate stamina (and ability to sweat to keep cool in the hottest part of the day, as well as the fact that we can carry water with us), and as long as you can track it, humans can run down almost anything.

That all being said, I'm REALLY impressed that they caught them alive, and were so compassionate about it. I mean, these guys were killing their goats, they lost a lot to the cats and they still captured them alive and were hosing them off after to make them comfortable. Also a very big deal considering how endangered they are and the lack of genetic diversity means every cheetah is really important for the species.
 
2013-11-15 07:23:45 PM

ManateeGag: Jesus!  Enough with the Obama threads today!  give it a rest!


Done in two.
 
2013-11-15 07:24:46 PM
They didn't do too well in outrunning those terrorists at the mall.

/too soon?
 
2013-11-15 07:26:55 PM

RexTalionis: Meh. Cheetahs are fast, but they have almost no stamina. Their bodies are simply unable to cool themselves while running at full speed and also the sprint will burn up their energy reserves very quickly.

Humans, on the other hand, are built for long-distance endurance running. On an open savannah where the cheetah has nowhere to really hide, I would give the upper hand to the people.


Also, I was listening to the BBC this morning; there's a huge stink about athletes from a certian African country not being tested for steroids; or being tested infrequently. It's big enough that they called a conference on doping in South Africa.

/ with an article

http://velonews.competitor.com/2013/11/news/anti-doping-bodies-to-mee t -one-year-after-armstrong_309166 (copy/pasta )
 
2013-11-15 07:27:48 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: The villagers captured them alive and handed them over to the Kenya Wildlife Service.

"I need compensation from them because the cheetahs killed most of my goats," Nur Osman Hassan told the BBC's Somali Service.

Is this a cultural thing, expecting money from the authorities when you approach them over an event that caused you loss, but which had absolutely nothing to do with them?  I recall seeing a documentary about a little boat sinking in the Persian Gulf, and a US Carrier group saving the crew - the first thing they did once on board the Navy ship was to demand money to pay for their boat that sank.


No, I *think* (not sure) it's more closely related to US programs that reimburse ranchers if a wolf kills their stock, in areas where wolves are protected. This way the ranchers will not suffer losses and therefore will be less likely to kill the wolves. Same thing here, cheetahs are seriously endangered, and their population numbers dipped so low, that their genetic diversity is pretty shiatty. They might not survive ultimately just due to that. And when your life depends on your livestock, you either have to protect it (kill all predators who threaten your herd) or you have to be compensated for the losses. Again just based on all I've read, I don't know if that's actually the answer.
 
2013-11-15 07:29:11 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: The villagers captured them alive and handed them over to the Kenya Wildlife Service.

"I need compensation from them because the cheetahs killed most of my goats," Nur Osman Hassan told the BBC's Somali Service.

Is this a cultural thing, expecting money from the authorities when you approach them over an event that caused you loss, but which had absolutely nothing to do with them?  I recall seeing a documentary about a little boat sinking in the Persian Gulf, and a US Carrier group saving the crew - the first thing they did once on board the Navy ship was to demand money to pay for their boat that sank.


"Acts of God", or in more modern terminology, "sh*t happens", is mostly a Western concept.  Everywhere else in the world, if something goes wrong, it's believed to be somebody's fault.  And since the government is the biggest somebody around, they usually end up getting the blame.
 
2013-11-15 07:31:05 PM
wearing skirts even
 
2013-11-15 07:33:52 PM
Let's not forget our very efficient use of energy and oxygen. We're just more efficient than most of the rest of the animal kingdom for endurance running.

/in addition to the sweating
 
2013-11-15 07:35:11 PM
Persistence hunting an apex predator is risky business. It will work a few times, then you get a smart one that realizes "F*ck all this running, these furless clawless fleshbags can't take a swipe worth beans!".
 
2013-11-15 07:35:55 PM
Well, when they run in anything, they often win.  Even US Presidential Elections.
 
2013-11-15 07:38:47 PM
news.bbcimg.co.uk
www.cabrn.bengalrescuenetwork.org
 
2013-11-15 07:42:31 PM
And presidential races?
 
2013-11-15 07:45:12 PM

ChubbyTiger: Let's not forget our very efficient use of energy and oxygen. We're just more efficient than most of the rest of the animal kingdom for endurance running.
/in addition to the sweating

//only the kangaroo and similar movers are more efficient on land. They actually "bounce" rather than jump. Their achilles tendons act like a spring and they hardly have to add any energy to that type of locomotion.
 
2013-11-15 07:46:26 PM
i.imgur.com

cdn2-b.examiner.com
 
2013-11-15 07:48:16 PM

johnnieconnie: Human beings area adapted to this kind of long-distance running. In an anthropology class about 20 years ago we watched a documentary showing how some African tribesmen could run down a giraffe to kill it in their traditional way, with spears. Basically, it was a long distance tag team, and it was pretty amazing to watch. Sad for the giraffe, it concluded with the butchering. But it really illustrated the way in which humans can be superior when working as a team...  hmmm


We don't have teeth or claws, we have bureaucracy.  Take that, Objectivists.
 
2013-11-15 07:52:23 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: The villagers captured them alive and handed them over to the Kenya Wildlife Service.

"I need compensation from them because the cheetahs killed most of my goats," Nur Osman Hassan told the BBC's Somali Service.

Is this a cultural thing, expecting money from the authorities when you approach them over an event that caused you loss, but which had absolutely nothing to do with them?  I recall seeing a documentary about a little boat sinking in the Persian Gulf, and a US Carrier group saving the crew - the first thing they did once on board the Navy ship was to demand money to pay for their boat that sank.


It is, but usually only in places where the Government has decided that the people can't kill the animal that is ruining their flock/herd of livestock. Basically, this was the tribal way of saying "You claim ownership of the cats? Fine. YOUR cat made a total mess out of my livestock. Pay up."

Knew an old lady who did that with deer here in Tennessee that were trashing her garden. Game warden said he couldn't let her shoot the deer, so she trapped them in a horse barn via high-fence paddock and loaded the deer in her horse trailer. Called the warden up and told him to come get "His" deer. They wound up relocating them.

/True story, old lady lived near a WMA by LBL.
 
2013-11-15 07:59:05 PM

impaler: Persistence hunting. Humans are some scary mother farkers.

Most animals, you just run away from. If you get away you're fine.

With humans - nope. They don't stop. They keep coming. You run away, take a rest, look up, and there they are, slowly coming at ya. Runaway again, take a nap, wake up, and there they are again, still coming. They have almost no need for sleep. They won't stop. No matter how fast or how far you run, they keep coming until you drop.

We are like the real life version of every b-movie serial killer.


That terminator is out there. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.
 
2013-11-15 07:59:17 PM
A winner never cheats, and a cheetah never wins.
 
2013-11-15 08:05:26 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: The villagers captured them alive and handed them over to the Kenya Wildlife Service.

"I need compensation from them because the cheetahs killed most of my goats," Nur Osman Hassan told the BBC's Somali Service.

Is this a cultural thing, expecting money from the authorities when you approach them over an event that caused you loss, but which had absolutely nothing to do with them?  I recall seeing a documentary about a little boat sinking in the Persian Gulf, and a US Carrier group saving the crew - the first thing they did once on board the Navy ship was to demand money to pay for their boat that sank.


Sure. In many places, whomever is the authority at the time is expected to figure out compensation for loss, or pass the matter along to someone that can.
 
2013-11-15 08:10:58 PM

HindiDiscoMonster: Well, I guess this confirms the validity of an old joke I heard...

What is the worlds Fastest animal?

An Ethiopian Chicken

/Yes, tasteless I know... just like the chicken they couldn't catch.



That is an old, old joke. I remember it from grade school.... and you totally farked it up.

It's supposed to go, "What's the world's second fastest animal? An Ethiopian chicken. What's the world's fastest? Any Ethiopian."

Note: I'm not taking credit, just correcting. I'd guess it was a joke that came about on schoolyards everywhere when the Ethiopian famines were in the news so much decades ago. Kids can come up with some evil humor.
 
2013-11-15 08:12:28 PM
Also, good on the Kenyans for not killing the cheetahs for just being cheetahs. I'm surprised since I'd usually expect most rural folks to just kill an animal that was bothering them. That's what ours often do.
 
2013-11-15 08:21:59 PM

mongbiohazard: Also, good on the Kenyans for not killing the cheetahs for just being cheetahs. I'm surprised since I'd usually expect most rural folks to just kill an animal that was bothering them. That's what ours often do.


There are millions of raccoon and coyotes.

There aren't that many cheetas left.
 
2013-11-15 08:25:51 PM
img.fark.net
 
2013-11-15 08:40:57 PM
It take a lot of qat to catch the big cat
 
2013-11-15 08:43:45 PM
This thread is comedy gold.

Cheetah-loincloth-wearing comedy gold.
 
2013-11-15 08:45:24 PM

hardinparamedic: mongbiohazard: Also, good on the Kenyans for not killing the cheetahs for just being cheetahs. I'm surprised since I'd usually expect most rural folks to just kill an animal that was bothering them. That's what ours often do.

There are millions of raccoon and coyotes.

There aren't that many cheetas left.


Got some yotes at a friends ranch that are wiping out his goats.  We could kill a hundred coyotes and not even make a  dent.
 
2013-11-15 08:54:10 PM

LoneVVolf: Persistence hunting an apex predator is risky business. It will work a few times, then you get a smart one that realizes "F*ck all this running, these furless clawless fleshbags can't take a swipe worth beans!".


I don't think a cheetah would do that, I've never heard of a man eating cheetah. A jaguar I would bet on though.
 
2013-11-15 09:01:03 PM

LoneVVolf: Persistence hunting an apex predator is risky business. It will work a few times, then you get a smart one that realizes "F*ck all this running, these furless clawless fleshbags can't take a swipe worth beans!".


Thus our nice big brains tell us to carry long sharp sticks (I'm sure there's a word for such tools) and hunt single animals in teams when they may defeat us in single combat. WE are the apex predator.
 
2013-11-15 10:05:13 PM
When I was younger, my friends and I could run down three cheetahs.

/actually, it was run down to the Cheetah III. Different kind of pu**y.
 
2013-11-15 10:07:27 PM
I am very impressed that they managed to do this without killing the cheetahs. If this would have happened in the States, somehow those cheetahs would have ended up being shot "by accident."
 
2013-11-15 10:17:14 PM
This should have been saved for Caturday. ( just 'sayin.)
 
2013-11-15 10:28:16 PM
Poor kitty.
 
2013-11-15 10:32:47 PM
Fast animals, Slow Children. Tonite on Fox.
 
2013-11-15 10:51:58 PM
Sivas Kangal. Surprised they are not using these dogs with their flock. They are being flock protection against Cheetahs in Kenya and are also bred to protect against wolves. Pretty bad ass dog. I want one to protect my house. :)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kangal_dog
 
2013-11-15 11:29:21 PM

impaler: Persistence hunting. Humans are some scary mother farkers.

Most animals, you just run away from. If you get away you're fine.

With humans - nope. They don't stop. They keep coming. You run away, take a rest, look up, and there they are, slowly coming at ya. Runaway again, take a nap, wake up, and there they are again, still coming. They have almost no need for sleep. They won't stop. No matter how fast or how far you run, they keep coming until you drop.

We are like the real life version of every b-movie serial killer.


"Listen, and understand. That Terminator is out there. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead."
 
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