Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Huffington Post)   Ted Cruz's father explains...sexual perversion due to atheism? Hey now, as a high level militant atheist, we're not perverts *at all*. Now if you excuse me, I have to go peg some Christians in the basement   (huffingtonpost.com ) divider line
    More: Amusing, Ted Cruz, humans, Ecuadoran, moral absolutism, perverts, population ageing, Rafael Cruz, Iowa Republican Steve King  
•       •       •

1268 clicks; posted to Politics » on 14 Nov 2013 at 10:08 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



115 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2013-11-14 10:23:48 AM  
Nearly 17,000 people have suffered sexual abuse at the hands of the clergy since 1950, according to USA Today.

This just support Cruz's theory, if you look at it the right way, I'm sure...
 
2013-11-14 10:25:23 AM  

Lionel Mandrake: You mean moral absolutes like "thou shalt not kill" And yet, I have a sneaking suspicion that Sr. Cruz is pro-death penalty.


That just means "thou shalt not kill" is merely an approximate rule-of-thumb for the actual exact moral absolute he's referring to -- roughly: "You should do whatever God commands you to do."

Cut to Euthyphro....
 
2013-11-14 10:25:36 AM  

IdBeCrazyIf: vpb: kxs401: How does one become a high-level atheist? I was unaware there were levels.

You get experience points for each perverted sex act, then you can level up when you accumulate enough of them.

So I'm guessing as the age goes down the points go up?

Sweet, I'm so gonna level after I fark that 13 year old this weekend


img.fark.net
 
2013-11-14 10:25:58 AM  

vernonFL: As a kinky bisexual who grew up Catholic, im really getting a kick out of these replies. You think you know kinky, but you dont.

/Okay, you do


Well we all have the internet, so perhaps we know kinky, but I assume that most of us here (myself included) don't haven't known kinky in the biblical sense.

On a scale of 1 (lights out, pull the wiener through the fly in your PJs) to 10 (back up the school bus full of tied up drifters and farm animals) I'm maybe a 6 or 7.
 
2013-11-14 10:26:54 AM  
God: "Still way ahead of ya."
 
2013-11-14 10:30:55 AM  
I like to feel really guilty and pretend a space alien is watching me every time I have sex.

I'm a normal moral Christian.

/paying tithes makes the guilt go away.
 
2013-11-14 10:33:39 AM  
In the Alamo?
 
2013-11-14 10:35:50 AM  
How has this thread gotten this far without anyone mentioning their high school experiences with Mormon girls?

It's amazing what they'll come up with short of actual "penetration."
 
2013-11-14 10:36:34 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: I like to feel really guilty and pretend a space alien is watching me every time I have sex.

I'm a normal moral Christian.

/paying tithes makes the guilt go away.


I wonder what percentage of Christians get off on God watching them every time they have sex.
 
2013-11-14 10:37:02 AM  

Rapmaster2000: In the Alamo?


That's what Ted Cruz calls Marcus Bachmann's butthole.
 
2013-11-14 10:38:51 AM  

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: [www.rawstory.com image 615x345]

Because atheists believe in doing whatever they want, and if there are no moral absolutes, then there will be nothing but moral anarchy, he said.

"Do we know any politicians that have done that?" he asked.

"Hitler!" volunteered Larry Pratt of the organization Gun Owners of America, who was in the audience.

"Oh, we don't have to go that far, Larry," said Cruz. "Just go to Washington. Just go to the White House."


He literally fought for Fidal Castro in the communist revolution. His Canadian-born son is Senator for Texas.  WTF.  This is crazy shiat.
 
2013-11-14 10:39:40 AM  

Headso: Rapmaster2000: In the Alamo?

That's what Ted Cruz calls Marcus Bachmann's butthole.


Corndogholing?
 
2013-11-14 10:41:34 AM  
Counterpoint: Catholic School Girls.
 
2013-11-14 10:41:37 AM  

Type_Hard: This has been making the rounds on my FB feed lately... seemed fitting...

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 281x320]

Well put.  Also, if you do moral things to avoid internal hell-fire or gain favour in heavan, you are doing it out of self interest not for the sake or morality itself.

Only a person who doesn't believe in supernatural rewards/punishments is capable of true morality for the sake of morality.

 
2013-11-14 10:43:13 AM  
I thought ya'll were all Pervects and Deveels
 
2013-11-14 10:44:59 AM  

loonatic112358: I thought ya'll were all Pervects and Deveels


I'm a dark sided slykick.
 
2013-11-14 10:45:15 AM  

milkyshirt: Headso: Rapmaster2000: In the Alamo?

That's what Ted Cruz calls Marcus Bachmann's butthole.

Corndogholing?


double ended corndog!
 
2013-11-14 10:45:38 AM  

Lionel Mandrake: And of course, this leads us -- when there are no moral absolutes -- leads us to sexual immorality, leads us to sexual abuse, leads us to perversion. And, of course, no hope. No hope.

You mean moral absolutes like "thou shalt not kill"  And yet, I have a sneaking suspicion that Sr. Cruz is pro-death penalty.


Mr. Cruz,

We atheists get our morals from observation of the world around us and compassion for our fellow man.

You get your morals from a book.

Who has the moral high ground, again?

/Yes, I did say this to Sarah Palin.  And I will say it to any Christian who claims that atheists have no morals.
 
2013-11-14 10:49:52 AM  

Troy McClure: While perverts and abusers can be found in any group of people, the atheist abusers don't have a powerful, international organization to help cover up the crime, hide the abuser, and move the person to another location where they can keep abusing without punishment.


At least, not anywhere but Soviet Russia.

/Just playing devil's advocate.
//Whose advocate?
///AAAARGH!
 
2013-11-14 10:51:23 AM  

PC LOAD LETTER: You would need to dig pretty deeply on 4chan to get to the level of perversion of this guy and his family:

[www.mmdtkw.org image 720x576]


Meh.  Most of the crap about the Borgias isn't true.  It was slanderous bad press started by his successor, Julius II, who hated his guts.  Alexander VI was a cultured man, who brought the Renaissance from Florence to Rome.

Go back into the Middle Ages, and you find Popes who were much more perverse than than him.
 
2013-11-14 10:52:14 AM  

IlGreven: Lionel Mandrake: And of course, this leads us -- when there are no moral absolutes -- leads us to sexual immorality, leads us to sexual abuse, leads us to perversion. And, of course, no hope. No hope.

You mean moral absolutes like "thou shalt not kill"  And yet, I have a sneaking suspicion that Sr. Cruz is pro-death penalty.

Mr. Cruz,

We atheists get our morals from observation of the world around us and compassion for our fellow man.

You get your morals from a book.

Who has the moral high ground, again?


Do you really think they'd say "you" to that argument?  Really?

Also: atheism is not an ethical philosophy, it's a response to the assumed default of religious belief.  You approximately described secular humanism, but some atheists are absurdists, some are existentialists, some are secular Buddhists, and some are even secular Christians(i.e. believing Jesus gave a good description of what it means to be a good person without being divine).

Humanism strikes me as the most pragmatic approach, but it's not the only one.
 
2013-11-14 10:54:28 AM  
I missed the part where I'm supposed to indulge in sexual perversion.  I'm pretty sure I've been a lot more strict about that sort of thing than most Christians, even.

Keep in mind, though, that "sexual perversion" is often Christer code-speak for homosexuality.

/atheist
//was a virgin until marriage
 
2013-11-14 10:56:56 AM  

nmrsnr: Why is it always sex with these people? If there are no moral absolutes, why not say it'll lead to wanton theft, robbery, assault, murder, hell, even human slavery? Why do they always go straight to the kinky sex stuff? In terms of biblical morality, that's way down on god's list of things to care about.

ikanreed: Because that's the distinguishing characteristic between their sense of morality and a good one. Atheists think things are immoral if they harm others. These douchebags measure immorality by a list of proscriptions.


More exactly, the research of Haidt and others suggest that such conservatives put somewhat less emphasis than liberals on caring (avoidance of harm) and fairness (equitability/reciprocity), due to conservatives also weighing In-group loyalty, submission to authority, and purity (including sexual).

Thus, the difference in sexual prescriptive norms from those divinely commanded by God is one of the most dramatic and obvious ones for highlighting.

Satan's Bunny Slippers: What the actual hell?


Secular humanism de-emphasizes in-group loyalty, authoritarian submission, and most purity stuff (aside from epidemiological control); it therefore undermines the "true" moral absolute rooted in "You should do whatever God commands you to do" -- with authority acting as the root for in-group and purity, as well as for equitability/reciprocity and care.
 
2013-11-14 10:59:35 AM  

ikanreed: Also: atheism is not an ethical philosophy, it's a response to the assumed default of religious belief.


Or, alternately, a class of philosophies which (either as primary premise or as inference) reject that default.
 
2013-11-14 11:01:46 AM  

abb3w: More exactly, the research of Haidt and others suggest that such conservatives put somewhat less emphasis than liberals on caring (avoidance of harm) and fairness (equitability/reciprocity), due to conservatives also weighing In-group loyalty, submission to authority, and purity (including sexual).

Thus, the difference in sexual prescriptive norms from those divinely commanded by God is one of the most dramatic and obvious ones for highlighting.


Well, we all have a little right wing authoritarian in us. An utter absence would be a sign that you're rebelling against your own nature.  It is only in comparing oneself to others that it appears minimized.
 
2013-11-14 11:02:49 AM  

abb3w: ikanreed: Also: atheism is not an ethical philosophy, it's a response to the assumed default of religious belief.

Or, alternately, a class of philosophies which (either as primary premise or as inference) reject that default.


Well, that's a shades of gray argument of infinite recursive depth.  Let's say I agree with that but prefer my wording.
 
2013-11-14 11:03:01 AM  

kxs401: How does one become a high-level atheist? I was unaware there were levels.


You start out as an A-1, in which you only get this t-shirt:

i1.cpcache.com


Once you can quote Dawkins from memory you get this snazzy belt buckle:

rlv.zcache.co.uk


This goes on until you reach the top of the Atheist hierarchy, at which time you'll be issued this license plate:

3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-11-14 11:05:00 AM  

sammyk: /athiest
//very much perverted
///when he's right, he's right


Being an atheist has no bearing on being a kinky SOB, though at least we're generally a lot more comfy with it.

Part of me feels like I should have taken advantage of some Catholic school girls' silly guilt complexes back when I was a proper age to do so :(
 
2013-11-14 11:06:58 AM  
Only if she's hot.

What if she at least has a cute face, I mean I'm not a wizard here. To correctly emotional manipulate them I need the proper poor body image and daddy issues. Those things are hard to find man.


You gotta come hang out with me some time. Among the people I regularly hang with, finding a woman WITHOUT body image and daddy issues is virtually impossible. Maybe the fact that all my friends are totally damaged should tell me something about myself now that I think about it.
 
2013-11-14 11:08:01 AM  

Lionel Mandrake: vpb: kxs401: How does one become a high-level atheist? I was unaware there were levels.

You get experience points for each perverted sex act, then you can level up when you accumulate enough of them.

You also get XPs for leaving "under God" out when you recite the Pledge of Allegiance, when you scribble "In God We Trust" off bills (the greater the currency, the more points you get), when you buy and/or read a book by Dawkins, Hitchens, or Harris, or lodge a complaint against a creche on public property.

And you pretty much go up an entire level every time you dunk a crucifix in a jar of piss.


Well, then, consider me a Demi-G....what's the equivalent of a DemiGod in Athiesm?  Demi-Hitchens?  Demi-BigBang?
 
2013-11-14 11:09:25 AM  

ManateeGag: Ted Cruz's biggest problem isn't going to be Chris Christie or RAND PAUL, it's going to be his own fathersupporters.


Now made slightly more historically accurate
 
2013-11-14 11:11:09 AM  

ikanreed: IlGreven: Lionel Mandrake: And of course, this leads us -- when there are no moral absolutes -- leads us to sexual immorality, leads us to sexual abuse, leads us to perversion. And, of course, no hope. No hope.

You mean moral absolutes like "thou shalt not kill"  And yet, I have a sneaking suspicion that Sr. Cruz is pro-death penalty.

Mr. Cruz,

We atheists get our morals from observation of the world around us and compassion for our fellow man.

You get your morals from a book.

Who has the moral high ground, again?

Do you really think they'd say "you" to that argument?  Really?


Well, if they say they are after that, they're too far gone.

Also: atheism is not an ethical philosophy, it's a response to the assumed default of religious belief.

And you're overanalyzing. It doesn't matter whether it's secular humanism, ethical culture, or what have you, these sorts of Christians lump them all under "atheism". You go to them with what they understand, and you beat them with it. That's how you get your point across.  Bog the argument down with "secular humanism" this or "existentialist" that and your argument gets lost.  Make the point first, then sort out the minutiae.
 
2013-11-14 11:11:39 AM  

Girl Sailor: Only if she's hot.

What if she at least has a cute face, I mean I'm not a wizard here. To correctly emotional manipulate them I need the proper poor body image and daddy issues. Those things are hard to find man.

You gotta come hang out with me some time. Among the people I regularly hang with, finding a woman WITHOUT body image and daddy issues is virtually impossible. Maybe the fact that all my friends are totally damaged should tell me something about myself now that I think about it.


*elects not to ask how she doing out of respect
 
2013-11-14 11:20:34 AM  
www.freethoughtpedia.com
 
2013-11-14 11:20:44 AM  

Sybarite: I've known some devout Christian women who had among the more perverted minds I've encountered. I always kind of wondered if they had to ask forgiveness for specific acts or if they just assumed God knew what they were talking about and brushed over the details.


There is a LOT of sadomasochism in the Bible.
 
2013-11-14 11:23:06 AM  
If that thing I do with rubber bands and maple syrup is perverse, I don't want to be moral.
 
2013-11-14 11:24:07 AM  

JusticeandIndependence: [www.freethoughtpedia.com image 400x400]


Damn
 
2013-11-14 11:25:11 AM  

kxs401: How does one become a high-level atheist? I was unaware there were levels.


You start out by wishing people "Happy Holidays".
 
2013-11-14 11:26:57 AM  

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: "Hitler!" volunteered Larry Pratt of the organization Gun Owners of America, who was in the audience.


Um....... I don't think Hitler was atheist.
 
2013-11-14 11:30:49 AM  
Ted Cruz's dad knows what he's talking bout when it comes to perversion. While he didn't invent the Dirty Sanchez, he did perfect it and made it the most artistocratic of all.

When his son dethrones Jesus Christ, I'm sure there'll be a book detailing it all.
 
2013-11-14 11:37:36 AM  
abb3w:

Secular humanism de-emphasizes in-group loyalty, authoritarian submission, and most purity stuff (aside from epidemiological control); it therefore undermines the "true" moral absolute rooted in "You should do whatever God commands you to do" -- with authority acting as the root for in-group and purity, as well as for equitability/reciprocity and care.

Oh I know.....I just cannot fathom that there are those who are so ingrained in whatever religion to have a problem with this.

But then again, yes, yes I can.....
 
2013-11-14 11:39:09 AM  

QueenMamaBee: Nina_Hartley's_Ass: "Hitler!" volunteered Larry Pratt of the organization Gun Owners of America, who was in the audience.

Um....... I don't think Hitler was atheist.


That's because you're not a republican.  A good challenge for republicans is to tell them to identify a public statement by Hitler they disagree with(once you substitute America for Germany).
 
2013-11-14 11:46:47 AM  
Empathy.

If you have it, the gravest sins are just impossible to commit. It has nothing to do with religion.
 
2013-11-14 11:48:19 AM  
Sexual Perversion Results From Atheism?

That's a funny way to spell "Catholicism".
 
2013-11-14 11:53:34 AM  

QueenMamaBee: Nina_Hartley's_Ass: "Hitler!" volunteered Larry Pratt of the organization Gun Owners of America, who was in the audience.

Um....... I don't think Hitler was atheist.


Forget it, he's rolling.
 
2013-11-14 12:05:25 PM  

kxs401: How does one become a high-level atheist? I was unaware there were levels.


Of course there are levels! There are levels for everything:
i560.photobucket.com

/even if I have to dig out ye auld rule booke to get them looking sorta right
 
2013-11-14 12:56:40 PM  

Crotchrocket Slim: sammyk: /athiest
//very much perverted
///when he's right, he's right

Being an atheist has no bearing on being a kinky SOB, though at least we're generally a lot more comfy with it.

Part of me feels like I should have taken advantage of some Catholic school girls' silly guilt complexes back when I was a proper age to do so :(


Duh! of course you should have.
 
2013-11-14 01:06:09 PM  

Satan's Bunny Slippers: Oh I know.....I just cannot fathom that there are those who are so ingrained in whatever religion to have a problem with this.


There's some data to suggest that although environment mediates expression, the attitude tendency toward authority precedes any particular religious upbringing.
 
2013-11-14 01:06:33 PM  
images2.wikia.nocookie.net
I'm changing my diagnosis to "Remarkably well-adjusted"
 
2013-11-14 01:12:30 PM  

Eddie Adams from Torrance: Counterpoint: Catholic School Girls.


I'd say the Mormons give them a run for the money. Something about oppressive religions making them freaks in bed. They just feel guilty afterwards.
 
Displayed 50 of 115 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter








In Other Media
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report